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Superhero

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by Superhero

  1. Yeah, ain't no way. BUT, those guys at the NFL combine can get some air. I get about 5" on a good day. 4" if you ask my wife.
  2. @Brisketexan?
  3. Can’t have just Asian and other smart people in Yale. Gotta mix it up with some dumb hicks.
  4. Damn. Memories. The Sonics were my team in the 90s.
  5. Staying hydrated in a shower is important. Downing a beer or four in the shower after a long day doing yardwork is the tits.
  6. WAY BEYOND SURLY at this one. I had a lull between my projects so I volunteered to help a team in another part of the country (not Seattle) with their project. Bid date was 08/19 (Who the fuck bids a project on Monday?) Anyway, had to book 2 trips, go there on Tuesday, come back on Friday to attend my wife's grandmother's funeral, fly back on Sunday and leave Monday. Now the bid date is pushed to 08/26 (Who the fuck bids a project on Monday?). My initial thought was to keep everything the same, but push it back a week. But I turn 50 on the 21st, and there's no fucking way I spend my birthday alone in another city. I've told their division president I'll get there Thursday. We'll see what happens. But this whole work thing is really cramping my lifestyle.
  7. Reggie Miller scored 9 points in 8 seconds against the New York Nets. What has Sid done?
  8. Couch fucker being an Iraq war veteran is a technically true, but dig deep and his job was to escort journalists. He was NOWHERE near the front lines.
  9. Andor says hello.
  10. Plenty of Mercedes, BMWs and a few Porsches parked in apartment parking garages. All about priorities.
  11. How does she take that girth?
  12. … then I think I’d have to sleep with the couch. Sacking JD would mean chief dumbass made a mistake. He’s gonna ride with the couch fucker ‘til the end.
  13. I spoke too soon. We just moved offices and I took a dump for the first time in the new space. The seat was lower than at the old office, and even lower than the ones at home. It’s not quite squatty potty low, but I expect things to go more smoothly here. [Putting a silver lining around a shitty situation]
  14. Are you 10 years old or just weird? I pity anyone who has to put up with your ignorance and broken moral compass. Now piss off and let the adults talk.
  15. That sounds like an elementary school restroom with the low toilets and hold-down faucets. Are you sure you’re supposed to be there as a grown man?
  16. I jammed my pinky while swimming with my kids. It’s still hurting after 3 weeks.
  17. Hollywood and AI content creators. You have your instructions.
  18. Steve Holt!
  19. Are you implying that I'm an Ohio couch fucker?
  20. We moved offices and the director level people now get their own offices (fuck you open offices). This is my new office on day 1. I need to personalize it. The white walls and fluorescent lighting make me think a black leather couch would seem appropriate, but unfortunately it won’t fit. Any of you want to play interior decorator?
  21. FYI, when the woman was looking at the cat outside, she asked "Do you want to come in and sit for a while?"
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