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Brisketexan

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Everything posted by Brisketexan

  1. Sigh....my kingdom for a president as experienced, wise, and measured as Vigo these days.
  2. Oh, we're worse. Because we have no excuse. We've actually TASTED having a relatively educated population, growing economic opportunity and prosperity....and we've now said "NOPE. WE WANNA BE LIKE MISSISSIPPI, BUT MEANER TO HISPANICS."
  3. 1990, 1970s, fuck it, I'm old. The point remains, beef fat is both better for the end product, and better for you (all things in moderation and all that).
  4. Fuck, it's made the driving experience damned near impossible for "lazy/comfort cars." And I like a lazy, comfort drive. But FFS, the other day, the rental car outfit put me in a new Honda Odyssey minivan. I get in, the hazards are on. It took me three minutes of hunting around the front of the vehicle to find the button to turn them off (not in any of the usual, central places -- or on the steering column). Then, I find the push start button....but cannot for the life of me figure out how to put it in gear. Shifter on column or floor? Nope. Instead, three buttons in a busy main console. Well, not three buttons. One button up top for Drive. Then, below it, kind of a button/switch for Reverse. Then below that, a button for Park. I adjust the mirrors (because the last driver was obviously a dwarf). Ten minutes after getting in the car, I can now leave the lot. On my drive, I stop to get a bottle of water. Come out....the mirrors all re-set to their previous setting, so I have to adjust them all again. Is there a button or something somewhere to make my setting the default, so I don't have to keep adjusting them? Fuck if I know. Maybe it's on the dash. Or the door. Or the center console. Or maybe it's the 9th option on the third page of the 2nd menu option on the LCD screen display. I want to start the car, use the turn signal, hazards, windshield wipers, and headlights, and shift it into its various gears. And I apparently need a 30 minute orientation session to figure out how to use features THAT HAVE BEEN EASY AND USABLE FOR FUCKING 70 FUCKING YEARS, WHY IN THE FUCK DO YOU NEED TO CHANGE EVERY SINGLE FUCKING ONE OF THEM?
  5. Had a colonoscopy this morning first thing. Was loopy, but hungry. Had the wife pull through McDonald's around the corner for an Egg McMuffin and hash brown for me to have for breakfast before taking a drug-fueled nap. It was exactly as good as it always is, and may be the best thing they do. Also, they should go back to frying their fries in beef fat. The science has developed since the 70s when they dumped that approach. Turns out, it's the better approach. And much more delicious.
  6. Louisiana: where they ban imaginary chemical pollution, but also eliminate all regulation of ACTUAL chemical pollution. We have officially evolved into a new species. Homo Dumbassmaximus.
  7. June 1st: Chaser Trump just wants to be able to say “I made a deal.” It doesn’t matter what the deal actually is, because he’ll just lie about it in effusive terms: “It’s a beautiful deal, an amazing deal, the most incredible deal ever, people are saying. Much better than the terrible deals Obama and Biden made.” The deal could provide for the US delivering nuclear weapons to Iran, and that’s what he’d say.
  8. Cool. But he still has your support, right? And the punchline is, there’s plenty of facefucking of children happening in this state as we speak. Just check in on an evangelical church youth pastor - fully protected by Paxton, of course. I just used an example of the most depraved crime I could think of. Or, as a Republican youth pastor would call it, “a pretty good Tuesday night.”
  9. I mean…the guy literally filed a public document in court admitting he broke the law…and has not only faced zero consequences, but is the most powerful official in the state. So, yeah, take your pick. He could slaughter a puppy, overcook a steak, cheat at cards, beat a grandmother senseless, what have you….his numbers would never go down.
  10. Stupid to build the rocket on stainless steel when they built a whole city on rock and roll.
  11. I've had downright bad barbecue at Smitty's in the past 5-7 years. Been a while since I've been to Kreuz. HOWEVER, I ate there on the actual opening day of the new Kreuz digs (it was opening day of dove season, we ate a bunch of bbq and then went hunting, it was a glorious day). Haven't been there in a quite a few years, though. Our typical Lockhart routine is 1) take some of the kids' out-of-town friends shooting at Lone Star Gun range, then lunch at Black's. Which has always been outstanding.
  12. The choice being:
  13. "Hey FSD, how are you doing?" "FINE." [crashing sounds]
  14. Yeah. Nobody here is saying that you can't put food X inside a tortilla and eat the hell out of it. We are Texan males who have all had too much to drink before. If it's edible, odds are we've at one point or another wrapped it in a tortilla and eaten it, proudly. But there's a difference between "I just ate some stuff from the fridge on a tortilla" and "come see our brilliant new taco this month!" Fucking hell, 95% of these places can't even execute a basic, regular taco (carne asada, carnitas, etc.) for shit. And certainly not for under $6.
  15. Trump's waiting to see if Paxton actually facefucks an infant to death while pledging his fealty to Lord Trump. I doubt he'll have to wait long.
  16. Because the car alerting the user that the system the user is relying upon just disengaged is WOKE. Why are you afflicted with the WOKE MIND VIRUS, bro?
  17. Mr. Simon is correct. It's hard to fathom because it's utterly backwards. The Gestapo is the bad guys. They are always the bad guys. This isn't hard.
  18. Man....and they still fucking HATE them some nazis. The museum at the Akershus fortress is all about "here's how utterly fucky the Nazis were, and here's how much we hated them. And we executed that fucker Quisling right over there -- get your photo taken on the exact spot where we ventilated the shit outta him!" So, you know.....going full Nazi when trying to sell them cars is certainly a choice.
  19. Dude. Paxton could facefuck an infant to death on live TV, and -- because at least one decent, human person (read: LIBTARD!) would say "dear God, that's awful! What a terrible person!" -- his support among GQP voters would go UP by at least 2 points. The cruelty isn't just the point, it's the sole attribute of any value to GQP voters. The more horrific the candidate is, the stronger their support. Because that REALLY owns tha libz.
  20. Don't get me wrong. A concoction like that is just fine if it's the result of "fucking hell, I wanna make a snack. Got some leftover grilled salmon in the fridge. Wonder how that'll taste if I crunch up some of these pistachios on it?" But goddammit. There's no great food that we can't utterly enshittify.
  21. Evil people should be treated as awfully as the law allows. There are no boundaries, no limits, other than "don't break the law." That's it. That's the only limit.
  22. I truly don't understand how "political insiders" don't see the obvious here. Seriously, it's as predictable as aggy shitting the bed. Hell, MORE predictable.
  23. Yes and no. The current information ecosystem prizes nothing as highly as it does stupidity, soundbites, trolling, and outright fucking lies. You cannot succeed WITHOUT that component. But I agree, the opposition voting base is not as susceptible to those things across the board, so you ALSO need, you know.....facts, truth, and logical reasoning. A one-two punch. Which will be two wildly different messages selling the same thing, but that's marketing, people. Like selling a luxury sportscar: Advertisement to people who read the Economist: "A luxury ride, with rich Corinthian leather, and the acceleration that the discriminating and skilled driver prefers." Advertisement to people who get their news from TikTok: "It makes awesome 'VROOM VROOM' noises! It goes super fast! Look at this video of a chick with big tits riding shotgun on a racetrack, with them tig ole biddies bouncing around!" You can sell the same car to both audiences.* We just have to get over ourselves and start speaking fluent VROOM VROOM AND TIG OLE BIDDIES and such, metaphorically speaking. * Note: both advertising styles will work on Surly posters.
  24. We just had friends who meet that description (they're a bit more religious than average, I think) over for dinner on Friday. And yeah....they've been in a super-shitty place since October 7th (and really, before that -- let's not forget the Tree of Life and anti-semitism of Trump Regime 1.0). Seems like whenever history decides to veer into "let's make things really shitty" territory, it always seems to follow with "and don't worry....we've got a special seat up front reserved for jews."
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