HateYouAndMyself

I don't buy that Football scoop article claiming Arnett is or has always been our top target. If that is true we have gone about this in a profoundly idiotic way. Could have locked him up days ago before Oregon got involved and certainly while LSU was still jerking itself to the idea of Freeman. We could still get Arnett but now it'll come with a 3 way bidding war driving up his price. So why wouldn't that have already been taken care of? Were we holding out for Quinn? That would be a pretty fucking dumb reason as him staying in the NFL was predictable as hell. The Raymond ghosting stuff is just bizarre and I'm not even going to bother trying to understand it until the hiring process is over. I'm a bit concerned we are trying to slow play him because Sark prefers Tosh and knows there isn't room for both plus the primary DC but Raymond is the kind of a guy where if you are getting a yes you take a yes and just write off whatever your 'alternative' plans were. Ash ultimately being the guy would feel like a bit of a dick punch but I went into this process reconciled to his return and being mostly okay with it so despite some sexier names having come and gone I guess I can't bitch if he is the choice. Especially if we just keep Hutzler. Would make that Joseph hire.. just fucking weird though since he isn't that great a complimentary piece to Ash. Lots of overlap in skillset and specialty.

Maybe Sark is traveling by hot air balloon so he can pick up Brees for that analyst role without ruining the surprise

I'm a bit surprised nothing has started to leak about Golding (if he is in fact our DC hire). You would think right about now is when Bama insiders would be told to leak that shit so they can get the initial shock over with amidst the celebration of the win and then pivot right into a replacement announcement late tonight or early tomorrow. Certainly doesn't mean its 'not' happening, but I was expecting something just like the O'Brien story that got put out there around kickoff.

I wonder if Bama hiring O'brien makes it more or less likely that Banks will walk and join us in Austin. I would think O'Brien has 'his guys' he will want to install in at least a few positions, right? I still think Banks is the white whale of the various Bama coaches who could potentially come with Sark (Flood would be I guess but I take that as a given)

When did Crowder trade in his balls for the most feminine and dainty of vaginas? NTTAWWT

Yadier Molina couldn't find an MLB gig so he is instead joining us an QB analyst. He will split the load with Drew Brees

This is probably bullshit but I'm choosing to believe its real until proven otherwise edit: just realized this probably the wrong thread for it but oh well

We just need to pretend we are hiring Golding, find out whoever Saban is going to replace him with and then offer THAT person like 4M a year to be DC

Can we hire whoever at Bama is able to use this black magic fuckery to always take out the opposing team's best offensive player on the first series of the game?

Personally would have preferred Arnett + Raymond over Golding + Scott but both are fairly great outcomes. Even if Golding underwhelms he should help Sark establish that Bama winning mentality throughout the program. A lot easier to impose all those small things that Bama does that give them an edge when you have both coordinators having just been coaching there. I don't care if we end up a shameless copy of the Bama program and their methods; it fucking works.

Simmons decides to stay with Sooners (was probably only ever fishing for a raise), Wiggins is a no, can't really get Tee Martin because of the scandal / ongoing investigation and then the USC guy is really not THAT dramatic an upgrade if at all over Coleman.. I can see in that circumstance just giving Coleman his shot with this different scheme and less ass surrounding him at other coaching positions. I do think we need to land big at TE coach, though. Flood is a solid recruiter but I'm not sure he can be 'the guy' to drive shit home and Coleman / Drayton are competent but not needle pushers. If anything at all maybe some player we were hoping to flip declared he is sticking with Bama / going there instead but I fully agree its dumb as fuck to believe that Saban would risk pissing off or alienating the guy about to call his championship game by dramatically flipping a coach from him an hour before kickoff

Is Milwee still with Bama? My understanding is that he vacated his analyst duties once he originally took the Ark St job. I do not believe he rejoined to help them with title game prep. I could absolutely be mistake, though. Point is, even with Milwee coming to join Texas he wouldn't necessarily be on any theoretical flight back from Miami since he might not currently be in Miami with the team anyway atm.

Clearly Cade Brewer is simply going to be a Player-Coach for the TE position

I would think Patricia would be an analyst hire, if at all. I don't see him jumping from HC of the Lions right into a college DC gig. That seems an odd fit. Especially with his name tainted a bit by his experience in Detroit. But joining a staff as an analyst and give something to do while he waits for his next real opportunity? Would make sense and explain those zoom calls with Sark (assuming the guy isn't just completely full of shit, which he probably is). Edit: Difference between Patricia and someone like Quinn, who I think did get real DC consideration, is Quinn was a DC in college before. Patricia hasn't done college work other than grad assistant shit at Syracuse Side note about Coleman: maybe this is an insane suggestion but couldn't he simply be coaching TEs if we are also getting Wiggins? A lot of programs basically combine the two units for the lion share of their drills and practice time and then shuffle the TEs in with OL for blocking scheme stuff. All his comments about Coleman 'working with the wideouts' would absolutely be true if half the time he is helping run WR drills along with Wiggins. The complete lack of names being floated for TE coach (I don't buy the Banks talk) has me thinking something like that is at least possible if unlikely.

Leaking Golding as DC right before he potentially gives up 60 to the OSU offense would be perfectly on brand for us so I see your point.

Ah didn't think it ventured into politics since it was just a goofball but better safe than sorry. Gotcha and will adjust edit: Also very fitting username since you're right, I didn't haha. Guess you can't delete posts once they've been quoted, but either way thanks for heads up.

Agreed. Marques Tuiasosopo is about as likely to be our TE coach as this guy

Oh that is the old Raiders/Jets QB?? God that takes me back. Announcers used to have way too much fun just saying his name as much as possible whenever he was in the game. Rest of this offensive staff is going to be absolutely beastly regardless of which WR coach target we end up with so if he is at least a solid recruiter it probably doesn't matter what other shortcomings he has.

I'll flat out admit I've never never heard of him before now but the moment I see some smaller program position coach get linked to one of our HC due to 'them having history' I automatically assume he fucking blows until proven otherwise. That is what the 2010s have done to me.

Or a very small seat belt that would fit a pet monkey?

I'd really like him on staff for recruiting, but if he's demanding play calling responsibilities and oregon will give him that, you just have to move on. The recruiting isn't worth sacrificing the entire defense. When we hired Joseph it made me wonder if perhaps that was part of also landing Lupoi. His issue at Bama was playcalling but specifically because he just had no advanced grasp on passing defenses. So get him on staff as Co-DC non-playcaller and he can learn from Joseph whose specialty is exactly that (passing defense schemes). Win-win for both of us and it sets Lupoi up to either be more prepared for his next true DC gig or even to be our primary DC if whoever we get to 'run' the defense gets a HC gig within first couple of years. I have serious doubts Oregon is going to hand him the keys to their entire defense any more than we would and a second failing by Lupoi would probably mark the forseeable end to his full DC / HC dreams so maybe he will be more open minded to what we can provide. Unlikely but it could happen. The problem in that scenario is we still have no one who can coach CBs / LBs and generally Lupoi has focused on the DL. Maybe he focuses instead on LBs and Golding shifts back to being a secondary coach like he was earlier in his career? I'll just say it right now that if we roll into 2021 with only Joseph, whose not really a player development guy nor a corner-specialty guy either, and Blake goddamn Giddeon as our only two secondary coaches we deserve the impending disaster that heralds. Maybe you get some dynamite sub-assistant level guys or something

Wait.. did Wiggins really follow Zach Smith? I'm going to take that as evidence he really is coming to Texas and he is simply brushing up on his Tom Herman drama so he can better relate to the survivors in our program upon his arrival.