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ernest_t_bass

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Everything posted by ernest_t_bass

  1. Started The Blacklist. Watched it years ago, but not sure where I ended it.
  2. Awesome stuff, Trey. The power and comfort of prayer is like nothing else on earth. Blessings to you and your family!
  3. I love the Office for what it is. I don't set high lofty expectations on my comedy.
  4. Update - things not looking good. My kids are out of the church, but my wife's resentment towards me is x10. She told my oldest daughter, but decided to do it on her own. If you pray, I need as much as you are willing to pray. I'm so broken and devastated right now. Christ came into my life at the exact right time. Peace, brothers and sisters.
  5. I hate tapa. Why on earth wouldn’t tapa make subscribed threads sort by last updated? Is it borked or am I borked? Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
  6. Just started Umbrella Academy with my daughter.
  7. Bump My counselor has me going through Romans 12:9-21 and breaking down each verse, and different parts of individual verses, and journaling how I can use what God says and apply it to my marriage, and apply it to how I choose to treat my wife. Example, verse 9 says that "love must be sincere" (NIV) or "without hypocrisy" (NASB). Great discussion with him on how to break that down, what it looks like, and how to apply it to our marriage. I'm telling you, I'm loving this counselor. Really challenging my heart, getting me into the word, and helping me keep my focus on my own personal relationship with God, above my marriage. When I'm focusing too much on our marriage as a primary focus, I get clouded by selfishness, and lack of reciprocation.
  8. Watched The Peanut Butter Falcon with the family. Solid, heart warming flick. 9/10
  9. We were seeing a counselor (against her will, imagine that), but it didn't pan out. Don't get me wrong, our attitudes were completely different going in. I wanted conviction, and I wanted to be rocked, so I could make fundamental changes in my life. She currently runs from conviction and struggle (minions doing work). However, the counselor was a jerk, in my opinion. He didn't know how to handle people differently. He spoke to me on my character/personality level, and got through to me, but he tried to talk to her in the same regard, and it backed her into a corner. Yes, part of that was conviction, but he didn't handle her with grace. I'm not just sticking up for her, b/c I think there is some "cop out" in it, but he was an arse. I've sense been talking to a new counselor, a pastor friend, who has been in credible. He's a professional in character value set analysis and application and works with high profile people in state and federal governments (secret service to name one). He has been wonderful for me, and it is not anything I'm forcing on my wife, as badly as I want her to participate. Over our 12 year marriage, it didn't matter how hard she tried (same with alcoholism), no changes were going to be made unless ETB decided to make changes for the good of his own self. As a believer, I truly believe in the power of prayer, so all I can do is relentlessly pray, seek positive earthly counsel, seek the Word, and seek Christ through thought and action. May the fruits of my labor be a light to encourage change.
  10. 1 - For the record, this is not "my church." I attended bed side baptist for the last 4-5 years. This was my wife's church that she took the kids, joined her mom, etc. Without discussion, she just no longer wanted to attend our old church (I liked that church). I have never liked the church where they decided to migrate, b/c it is weak theology... bread and water, no meat. The pastor has apologized to me, and I bought it. Stupid me. 2 - As a 5-year recovering drunk, I served self, and chased the next drink, never the last. Took me 5 years to stop those ways, even though alcohol is no longer present. I still struggle mightily. We are very different people, but divorce is not an option for me. I want to respect each other, and learn to love each other for our differences, not resent each other. It took me a LONG time for Christ to get ahold of my heart, so I'm holding out hope for her. I once despised the ground she walked on, zero attraction, etc. When I learned (again) the true love of Christ, "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us," and that truly and sincerely hit my heart like a freight train, I saw this woman for the first time. Love overcame me, and it still does to this very day. While I get frustrated, I'm letting go of resentments, and I'm learning to LOVE!
  11. I listen to Sirius XM Channel 63 to immerse myself with the positive atmosphere in which I want to live. It has nothing to do with anyone else besides me. It's not blared aloud as I cruise the streets. It's for me and my own heart. I love Mercy Me.
  12. Aside from God's will. My will. Etc. My kids can't be taught the word of God by someone their mother had an affair with. If the husband has an affair with the babysitter, you don't still keep taking your kids to the same babysitter.
  13. So in regards to my current dilemma of getting my kids out of the church... My stomach has been in knots since I found out the pastor was back in the pulpit (after 6 weeks), I've sought the word of God, counsel from another pastor, counsel from God fearing men, b/c I knew how the conversation would go when I finally brought it up to my wife. For the record, I just want my kids out of there, and eventually my extended family (MIL, BIL+fam). I do not care how the church handles the pastor. That is between them and God. I couldn't take it anymore, so I brought it up last night, and it was a huge blowup. "He made a mistake! We have to forgive! The kids love that church! You try to control everything!" To which I say, "I want my kids out of there. They can't be lead by a man you had an affair with." I'm just going to keep it at that, b/c I could babble forever on the pleasantries of our exchange. She will not forgive me for leading a godless life, marriage, family for 12 years, but she will forgive him immediately for tearing our family apart, from the pulpit no less. There is not an ounce of joy in her, a supposed believer, for me recommitting my life to God. She has so much resentment built up towards me. Anywho... brothers and sisters, please pray for me and my wife and my family. Pray that #1 we will both seek what God wants first and foremost. That our hearts are filled with scripture, and a love based on what Christ exemplified. #2 that we are ready and willing to build a marriage built on the love and passion that Christ has for us, and eager to share that with each other. God bless all of you
  14. Watched Airplane last night. 11/10. Classic
  15. My problem... Apparently this pastor's plan was to confess to the congregation on July 5, the day after the sins had been revealed. Problem is, all of our family that attends that church was in Tennessee at the lake. MIL, two BIL and their family. The service was not put on Facebook. So no one has any clue what was said. Since then, he removed himself from the pulpit, but still lead worship. I told my wife that she was done with that church (obviously), but my kids still go there with their grandmother. My daughter was just baptized there 2 weeks ago, but by the old senior pastor, not the offender. No way I'd have ever let that happen. I'm not going to go into detail, but my problem is this... August 16, the offending pastor reclaimed the pulpit. 42 days of unbiblical repentance is apparently enough. My belief, based on God's Word from Titus, 1 Timothy, 1 Corinthians, is that he is disqualified as a pastor. He, like anyone else, deserves God's forgiveness, but we hold overseers to a higher standard, and based on this standard, he is no longer qualified to lead a church. My children still go there, and that is struggle #1. My extended family still attends, and that is struggle #2. I need prayer, and I need to make sure that I do not act out of selfish desires, rather let God take control of this situation. 1 Timothy 3 Qualifications for Overseers and Deacons 1 Here is a trustworthy saying: Whoever aspires to be an overseer desires a noble task. 2 Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife,temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach, 3 not given to drunkenness, not violent but gentle, not quarrelsome, not a lover of money. 4 He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full[a] respect. 5 (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?) 6 He must not be a recent convert, or he may become conceitedand fall under the same judgment as the devil. 7 He must also have a good reputation with outsiders, so that he will not fall into disgrace and into the devil’s trap. Titus 1 Appointing Elders Who Love What Is Good 5 The reason I left you in Crete was that you might put in order what was left unfinished and appoint[a] elders in every town, as I directed you. 6 An elder must be blameless, faithful to his wife, a man whose children believe[b] and are not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient. 7 Since an overseer manages God’s household, he must be blameless—not overbearing, not quick-tempered, not given to drunkenness, not violent, not pursuing dishonest gain. 8 Rather, he must be hospitable, one who loves what is good,who is self-controlled, upright, holy and disciplined. 9 He must hold firmly to the trustworthy message as it has been taught, so that he can encourage others by sound doctrine and refute those who oppose it.
  16. Now that I'm at a computer and have time, I'll share my testimony. First... sober since April 27, 2015. I was raised in a non-denominational, very legalistic church. That church has since exposed their own love of legalism, repented, and fallen on God's Grace. Doesn't mean the congregation doesn't still struggle, but their old legalistic ways have been brought to light. I went to church 3x per week and it was force fed. I had many "come to Jesus" moments, but my first true experience of God revealing himself to me was at the age of 19. I felt like I accepted Christ's salvation at that point, but I strayed and lived my own life. I left the Word, and joined the world. I struggled and teetered with "believer" and "agnostic." Never an unbeliever, but definitely questioned. I struggle with control, and I've never wanted to give up full control. Admitting my struggle with alcohol was hard enough, but not enough to bring me to the God/Christ of the Bible. I was very selfish in my marriage for 12 years (we just celebrated 12 years in July). Honestly, my wife and I struggle very much with our own selfishness and self-serving in our marriage, as I'm sure all couples do. Well, here is where God decided to say enough is enough, and lead me to him... Last fall (2019) I decided to join a group of guys in a Bible study. Very hesitant, and was there more for the fellowship than anything else. Last October I bought my first devotional book, and remember texting the group... "I can't believe I just bought this... here we go." God worked on my heart for months, slowly building a full on revelation of Himself to me. In April my wife and I had a big blow up, I left the house for a few days, and it lead to a lot of introspection, and God said... "Get your head out of your butt and start changing your ways." At that point, I decided to start working on our marriage, and my selfishness. 12 years of this crap, so my wife is/was very hesitant. Lots of back and forth and pushback from my wife, regardless of my efforts. "Is there anyone else?" I would ask countless times. "NO!" is the response I got every time. Nose to the ground, I kept working, kept reading, kept my fellowship, and God kept bringing me closer to him. And then... July 4th we're at my BIL's lake cottage for a few days. I was hesitant to go, b/c I did not feel my wife really wanted me there. I felt like she wanted me there to save her own face, and didn't want to explain to people of a failing marriage, and wanted me there for my own pleasure, rather than the pleasure and company of each other (if that makes sense). I obviously decided to go, and things were going "decent," and there was a little bit of connection. On July 4 in the afternoon, I decide to walk to the house to go to the bathroom, check my phone, while my wife was at the lake about 100 yards away. I had zero intentions of checking her phone when I went up there, but something lead me to do it. I checked her messages, and nothing. You're an idiot, ETB... wait, let's just check Instagram for the heck of it. What's this?... a message from her pastor. I read through the message, and I see some I love you's. My naivety and my trust won't let me believe it is anything other than a pastor reaching out to his flock... "I love you in Christ." Then I see some "Baby's" in the message. Then I go back to about a week before the lake, and she says to this guy, "Oh my gosh, he said he's coming to the lake on 4th of July. I don't want him there." To which he responded something to the effect, "It's OK. Maybe you won't have to be around each other much. I wish I could just squeeze you and snuggle you." At that point, I lost it. I confronted her sister in law (brother's wife) and she knew nothing and was appalled. I called for my wife and confronted her. I was 8 hours from home, and I should have just taken off and left, but I didn't. God said, "Run to ME!" That is all I wanted to do. I wanted to pick up the Bible, I wanted to pray, and I had no idea why. Was scaring the heck out of me, b/c that wasn't "me." I'm not going to get into the repentance and reconciliation process that is frustrating me to no end, but I will say that it has been repeated over and over again that there was never anything physical, and that this was purely an emotional affair. My own insecurities give me doubt. My wife said that from start to finish, this probably lasted 6-8 months, which lead me to back track and apply it to my own experience, and please take joy in this revelation. This is my take on it... October - perhaps this is when this "friendship" started, when they started giving things to each other that belonged to their respective spouses. God starts his work on me, and I purchase my first devotional book. Had this affair been brought to light, we would be divorced, and I would not have God in my life on my own accord. April - perhaps this is when the "friendship" crossed the line into "I love you." Wife and I have a blow up. She said she wanted to tell me of the affair then, but did not. God turned it up a notch, and said, "Work on yourself and your marriage. Get your head out of your butt." Had I learned of the affair then, I would not have been able to stay with my wife. I was not strong enough. Probably divorce, or a firm separation. July - this is when everything was revealed. God finally said, "ETB, you're ready. I have prepared you to deal with this, and to bring Me glory through this. Here you go. Here is what is happening." God waited until I was ready to repair my marriage for His glory before He revealed it to me. He put my wife through this for a reason as well, but I'm still not sure why. She has not fully repented, and is still burying things, but I have to continue to pray that God will not only work on my own heart, but on hers as well. I am drawing closer to Him daily, and our marriage is at a very slow rebuild. I have more to share, but it is a different problem, so I will save for another post. To God be the glory!
  17. This is not intended to be a spam thread, rather a thread for those who are believers to unite, throw prayer requests (and know they'll actually be taken), talk scripture, etc. I've recently recommitted my life to Christ, this time for good (39 years old). As a recovering alcoholic, I know it's one day at a time. Today I am sober, and today I choose to follow Christ.
  18. And then a few episodes later where he had the "drunk" dream. The reality was all sorts of uncomfortable.
  19. Watching Catastrophe with my wife. Rob's relapse almost had me in tears :(
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