Bernard

No specific excercise. Just going about my daily business. Bernard

They are cops with law degrees. What do you expect? Bernard

1. Briargrove to Med Center is no picnic. 2. Lots of ways to get from WestU to Med Center without getting on Kirby. Bernard

Sister came in from Cali today. Straight from airport to Pappasito’s. Kept it pretty keto: guacamole, ceviche, bacon wrapped shrimp, shared some of sis’s fajita meat. I drank iced tea while she’s downing beers. Next fast starts after mom’s 75th birthday on Tuesday. Still hovering around 75 pounds lost Bernard

How badly do you need a real, actual yard? In that price range, the nice houses on top locations are few and far between. If you can deal with a townhouse, you can have the best of the best. Bernard

The real question is how long before Costco buys Specs and Walmart buys Centential? Bernard

Contrary to many posts above... This isn’t about letting Walmart and Costco sell booze in their existing stores. This is about letting them (or any other publicly traded company) own liquor stores. Nothing in this ruling, assuming it stands up to appeal, changes the fact that liquor will still be sold in exclusively in liquor stores on prescribed days and hours. Walmart and Costco and now open liquor stores. They can also acquire existing liquor stores. Bernard

Is the fastest message board ramp up ever? Bernard

Who made that jump? Everyone who thinks UFO = ET transportion vehicle. U stands for Unidentified. If you haven’t identified it, then you don’t know what the fuck it is. Why assume that it is a alien? Bernard

I’m prepping a lawsuit against Kevin Morgan to regain ownership of the Bernard Forum. Until the judge gives a ruling, we’ll just have to keep all the tales of lying, cheating, thieving, assuaging and murdering cops (and their colleagues who cover for them) in the yet-to-be-named News forum. The boot lickers and those who prefer to bury their heads in the sand, will just have to deal with it. Bernard

WeMo WiFi light switch turns on/off my front porch lights at dusk/dawn. It automatically adjusts to changing sunset/sunrise times. Best $40 ever. Honeywell WiFi thermostats. I’ve had programmable before, but changing the program was a pain. Now I can adjust the program with a few clicks on the app. Also great is the ability to turn the thermostats way up when leaving town in the summer without having to come home to a hot house. A couple clicks a few hours before arriving and the temps are perfect when I get home. Bernard

Just a reminder of the power of Shaggy/Surly... When all this shit was going down, I pinged a buddy of mine who’s a partner at PWC. He replied that he knew nothing of the situation, but had heard the story from about ten different people over 24-48 hours. Said he was checking with HR for more info. Next day HR informs him they pulled his job offer. Never underestimate Shaggy/Surly. If my buddy heard it himself from 10 different people, PWC probably heard it from 1,000 people. Bernard

I’m three minutes from 59 and Sweetwater. That was as far from the freeway as I would consider. Four minutes to Town Center. Easy walk/bike to all kids schools. As far as suburbs go, I’m pretty happy with it. Bernard

Welcome to the fasting club, Mr. Drummond. Eating once a week amazing. I would have never believed it possible until I started doing it. Bernard

If I had to commute from Sugar Land to Downtown everyday, I'd: 1. Suck it up and pay the HOV/HOT tolls; or 2. Buy a cushy 60+ MPG scooter that can hit 80 MPH, stash some rain gear in it, and cruise the HOV free every day. Super easy ride straight to/from downtown, or 3. Pick up a slug from a Smith Street bus stop, ride HOV to West Belfort Transit Center, drop them off, continue solo on 59 (traffic flows freely after Beltway 8 until 99 mess). I'm assuming #3 is possible. Never done it. I do know a Texas Ex chick who use to do something similar years ago to get on the Katy Freeway HOV. She kept a small sign in her car. Picked up people from bus stop. She says she never had a problem finding riders. Now she lives in a new Bellaire mansion, so it's not an issue. All that being said, at the hours OP is talking about, traffic is rarely an issue. Being close to the freeway is a big help. Some suburb locations are a beating just to get to the freeway. Avoid that at all costs. Bernard

Not eating anything. I’ve done it for roughly 75 of the 90 days so far in 2018. Guaranteed to lose weight. Bernard

How does one make the jump from “I don’t know what I saw” to “I know exactly what I saw and I’m positive it was an alien space craft”? Bernard

There's a guy in a white van out in the parking lot waiting to help you out. Bernard

Cold. Delicious. Beer. Need I say more? Bernard

Long Haul CSB: Guy I’ve known since I was kid worked for Shell for 20+ years. For quite some time he spent two weeks of every month in Brunei. IAH to Tokyo to Guam to Brunei. One day his boss appeared at his office door and told him his BusinessFirst tickets were costing too much and he’d have to fly coach. Dude just glanced up from computer and said, “Fuck that. I’ll quit this company before I fly there in coach.” Boss replied, “OK. Nevermind”. He never mentioned again. Bernard

Tower Records didn't appear before 1989(ish). So it has to be after that. Bernard

Ha. Yes. Just realized it was Rocko. Bernard

Cubic zarconia is actually more brilliant. She'll never know. If she finds out, tell you had to take a stand for the victims of violence and corruption that is part and parcel of the diamond business. Separately, you're about to enter into a legally binding contract stipulating that 50% of every penny you earn for the entirely of your marriage instantly becomes hers. Great idea. Bernard

1st of 6 five pounds fasts to get me from 70 to 100 is complete. Scale hit 75 pounds lost this AM. Time for another Elaine Benes approved Big Salad. Full Discloure: the water fast has become a bit less strict in the past week or so. GF made tacos one night. I had a few spoonfuls or seasoned ground beef straight rom the pan. Steaks on the grill another night. She ate 2/3rds of a New York Strip. She was about to wrap up the leftover portion and put in the fridge. Seconds later it was in my belly. So tasty. Starting round 2 of 6 tomorrow. Bernard

RIP Otto's Hamburgers. Their Super Burger (double meat, double cheese) kicked so much ass. Their BBQ restaurant out back was no bueno though. Bernard