Funk Doctor Spock

I tried telling the folks on the recruiting board they were a poverty program, but they weren't having it.

Hwy, Zuhn. How you feeling about Ant Hill and the rest of the team now? Have you played the #1 defense before? Cause your ass got shut out on offense. Thanks for playing.

I call bullshit. He's at least closer to Tom Brady than Cam Rising. He's applied for AARP.

Absolutely awful. He can't rap. His cadence is fucking horrible. He sounds like one of those idiots at a party that tries to rap when they're drunk.

Dillon Gabriel is the same age as Aaron Rodgers, so he's seen some shit on his journey from UCF all the way to the PNW. He's basically Lewis and Clark.

We going balls deep this go-round

Fuck you, Napier. I hope you catch dysentery, dengue, yellow fever, and Zika at the same, you fucking piece of platypus shit! How motherfuckers gonna de-commit from a school going to the SEC championship AND the CFP? What fucking world are we living in?

Fuck your fucking face, Napier. I hope you lose every game next season by 50, you piece of shit!

Dude will reach 1k this season to keep the streak going. Bet on it. He's a fucking dude.

Username check out

It was us, but in a sarcastic way.

True. But their coach apparently is a shitty recruiter (which I thought he was OK, but apparently not). Poor bastards. Maybe they'll slip down to 26 where they'll be raked after last night.

Dude, I don't want facts. Stop it!

That's a shame. What will they do now

The heir apparent to Banks looks really fucking good. Didn't miss a heat.

Well let's hope as get Mathis on cxampus.

Ah, forgot about then adding that to their record.

They have the 11tg ranked recruiting class and they're complaining. Because of course they are. They aren't a blue blood. They'll never sniff a top 3 class again because it's being held up by Sips, UGA, and possibly Bama/fOSU

Dear diary....

Jesus Christ. It's like they expect year 1 to be NC contenders. They're too impatient. Gotta keep up with the Joneses. A competent HC will build his team over time, but that's not what they want. They're babies who want it Now! I don't want to wait for year 2, 3, 4 to build a roster. Gimme gimme gimme. God damn. It's like dealing with kids on Adderall.

Wait, didn't they win 9 games this year?

Having family members graduate from A&M they're 2%ers. They don't make up shit and make excuses. They know their deficiencies. They're big time donors, but they know they're behind Texas in a big way, but they still do what they can. We always rib each other each Christmas when they call me a tea supper and I call them sheep lovers. They're cool as shit, and super fucking hilarious. I wish they would get on this board y'all would like them. They're like bizzle but don't travel to spotty Vancouver. I'll try again this Christmas to get them to sign up. Like me, they're into self deprecating humour. The only issue is my cousin is dealing with muscular dystrophy and needs around the clock care, but she's aware. She does read the boards and finds them hilarious, so it makes her happy.

#1 you're an aggy

I'll miss you, fam. #DBU

I just saw a third year QB struggling to find his read and overthrow his WR's, or miss their routes. I really thought he would single-handedly lose us the game. And then I realized we hade the #1 defense in the nation for a reason, and every absolutely balled the fucked out. I was so tense my gummies didn't work that's how badly I wanted to beat those assholes. God our defense is God-level. Sorrell. Burke, Simmons, Collins, Broughton, January, Mukuba, Taaffee, Mcdonald, Muhammed, Barron. Holmes, and the list goes 3 deep. To say we're blessed would be an understatement. They've sweat blood, sweet, and tears for this program and they will be rewarded with an NFL contract. We're gonna miss them, but we got ballers coming in. We do it the Bama way, not the Georgia way, who has only been to the CFP 3 times. 2017, 2021, 2022, and that's it. Sure, they have as many titles as Clemson, but we have a coach who learned under both Pete Carroll and a Nick Saban. We're now at rgw elites table it wasn't an aberration from last year, we're in the SEC CCG, and the playoffs in year 2 in the supposed "hardest conference" It's not hard to recognize we will win a NC or 3 with Sark at the helm. I have full faith in the man for what he's done, and his recruiting has proven he's dedicated to getting us there he will not stop.