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William Bludworth

Burnt Ends
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Everything posted by William Bludworth

  1. I'm not picky. Shower, shitter, wherever the lord takes him. Although I'm doubting he can shower or shit on his own. I feel really, really bad for his home health nurse. The smell alone. Can you Imagine? I would rather inhale methane from a deceased body.
  2. Aren't they the same person?
  3. Dope. I trust Dabo's recruiting which is why I found it weird that they list him as a three-star. Lol, OK. Clemson's record may not be good, but y'all sure as hell have good players. I still can't get over the fact you have three possible first round picks at WR and the bottom fell out. Did two out of three get injured? I watched a game where I saw Williams come out, but I think he went back in. Man y'all are absolutely loaded. There is absolutely no reason at all for your season. None.
  4. Which is both weirdly a miracle and also scary to think something like that could walk into your home, eat all of your food, and there is no way to stop him. Not even a crane could move that amount of mass.
  5. What is Keegan-Michael-Key doing there? Who knew he was a beam over? As for that sideline reporter...
  6. I was aiming for at least 3, so lets go with every year he's alive he gets a $5m raise. So yeah, one year. Two tops. Give him some incentive to stay alive. It's not like they know what to do with money, anyway. Might as well just give it to his family until they too die of a massive stroke.
  7. The one thing I'll say about my aggy family is they are 2%ers. Very successful, but also very realistic. Hell, my cousin even said Miami would beat them, with my uncle chiming in he was right. They were talking about how they robbed ND of the win, and then Texas came off the top ropes. They said that's when it dawned on them they have played no one, and the one team they did destroyed them. They just plainly stated there was no way they were winning a CFP game after having to make a miraculous comeback against a 4-win USCe team, barely escaped a 5-win Arky that Texas pummeled, beat a hapless Mizzou with a third string QB, beat a coachless LSU, and barely escaped against a 5-win Auburn. They knew. We watched it together and it was brutal for both teams. Neither should have been in the CFP. Cristobal is so fucking bad. Elko is about to have to rebuild, which as far as I know he's never had to do before. We all just sat there laughing at how bad both teams are. I'm just glad they don't make excuses and shit. They're real people who don't live in fantasy land. Reed is worse than I remembered. I thought maybe it was a one-off against us because we're just better all around, but nope, he's dog shit. They better figure something out soon because they won't be making the CFP again in the next 3-4 years. They have to let Reed walk. Literally any QB on their roster has to be better than him. He's less than a scrub.
  8. Hate to see that. These bowl games are fun, but it's still just as brutal as a regular season game. Hopefully it's nothing too serious and he makes a solid recovery.
  9. Obviously a Lacrosse player.
  10. Yeah, but if you're an alcoholic she can always be a 9.
  11. If God exists, he'll do us this favor and have the aggy brass sign him to a lifetime contract with no buyout fees if he ever decides to leave. Each year his salary gets bumped up $1m until he dies of a coronary heart attack in his shower.
  12. I'm over the whole PK is gone stuff. He dug us out of the grave, I'm grateful for him, he's moving on, we're better for it. We can't keep having shitty secondaries praying our front 4-5 can constantly get to the QB, or hoping our Edges/LB like Simmons, Umeozulu, Terry, Lance Jackson, Spence, Bo Barnes, Ty Smith, or Orogbo can keep pulling rabbits out of their asses and kill someone. I'm actually surprised Sark is keeping Orphey since our DB's looked like asswater so tainted that chlorine tablets couldn't clean it. Travaris Robinson will make a damn good safeties coach if Muschamp ever gets around to hiring him. I want to see what he can do with Zelus Hicks, Xavier Filsaime, Jelani McDonald, Jonah Williams, Graceon Littleton (if he's not moved to corner full-time), and JJ-R.
  13. Yes, but if he came here he can help us score against them, and that will make up for his lack of production against daddy. If he doesn't come here it means he either sucks (he went to ou, so we already know that), we don't want him, or...that pretty much nails both options.
  14. I saw a video title from OTF about Clemson safety Khalil Barnes. Anyone know how good he is? I know nothing about him, but he's rated a three-star as a transfer. Obviously the coaches know better, especially considering Mosley was a "three-star" and he balled out. Same for Trey Moore, who did well at his time here. Not a world beater, but we definitely needed him and he delivered. @Doc Sam Beckett What can you tell me about Barnes? I have no idea if he would even come here or if the coaches are actively recruiting him.
  15. Pitts is underutilized simply because all they want him to do is catch, and he's a pretty good blocker, but look who's running the team. Why they drafted him is beyond me if he's only getting the ball passed his way 3-4 times a game (with the occasional 5-6), and most are for 5/6 yards. If Bijan were anywhere else he would be the top RB in the league, instead they just don't know what to do with a generational talent, so they pair him with a scrub in Allgeire because...reasons. Imagine Bijan on Philly's squad, Detroit, Seattle, or hell, even Tampa Bay (that's just my dream speaking), he would be even more incredible. Saquon says Bijan is the best back in the NFL, and so did Jonathan Taylor. Coming from those two, it's hard to argue. Although I think I would have Bijan, Saquon, Jahmyr Gibbs, and McCaffrey 1a, 1b, 1c, and 1d. In no particular order. Dude has 1,250 yards rushing @ 5 ypc and 6 rushing TD's to go along with 800 receiving yards and 3 TD's. He has over 2,050 yards from scrimmage and 9 TD's. How do you fuck that up? To put that in perspective, Saquon has 1,072 rushing with 7 TD's @ 4 ypc and 273 yards receiving and 2 TDs for 1,345 yards from scrimmage and 9 TD's; Gibbs has 1,102 w/ 13 TD's rushing and 560 yards receiving w/ 4 TD's for 1,662 and 17 TD's from scrimmage; McCaffrey has 1,039 rushing w/ 9 TD's and 849 receiving w/ 7 TD's for 1,888 and 16 TD's. Only Bijan has over 2,000 all purpose yards and is on the worst team. As for Pitts, he's a great pass catcher, but they rarely ask him to do much else, so he just tries to find someone to block. The Falcons are an absolute shit show that make Dallas look like prime New England. Honestly, I wish Harbaugh would have gone there. He at least knows how to use the running game and TE's. It's hard to pull for Atlanta when they're run by morons. Between Arthur Smith and Raheem Morris, I don't know who is the shittiest. Neither coach earned it, and they have no offensive identity whatsoever. When your TE has more receiving yards than your #1 WR, you're going backwards.
  16. We want Venebals to stay at ou as long as Paterno stayed at Pedo. That's like one million cat years.
  17. It's really hard to say for me, personally. I guess because since Sark owns BV he looks average to below average, but when I see him against other teams he looks the part of a top-5 defensive coach. I don't know if it's mind games he's playing with himself when going against us or we're just that much more talented (using recruiting rankings). I will say I do think he's a top-5 defensive guy. He just can't get over the hump against us, and he was a moron for letting Gabriel walk in favor of Arnold, who we all knew was asswater. I really, really hope Maqueer is back next season. He's the gift that keeps on giving, and Muschamp will murder him. I was way too young to remember him, but a few months ago (maybe you?) someone corrected me about who went 4-0 against ou and I went down a rabbit hole on this guy. What an absolute stud. I came away with a new found respect.
  18. They're a veterinary school. They get spayed and neutered before starting classes.
  19. I don't want to give Ryan Williams what he wants because, well, he has Wingo hands. But if he's affordable (he's not) and won't break the bank, take him. He's not total shit, he's shown flashes, and obviously not every WR is made the same. He had a shit year, and that may be his mean, but what he showed his freshman year was nothing short of phenomenal for a kid who was just 17. I don't know if it's a Soph slump or what, but my guess is he's soft. Once he got lit up hard he wasn't the same again. He avoids contact. All I was saying is if Sark took him (he's not leaving Bama so it's moot) I would be fine with it. No disappointment. But I would much rather have Antonio Williams, TJ Moore, or Wesco (man that's crazy they have three bad ass WR's and can't win more than 6 games). Cam Coleman is just another Wingo, so I don't care about where he lands. Wingo, Williams, and Coleman all seem to have a problem catching the ball.
  20. This so perfectly encapsulates aggy lol
  21. Stefon Diggs - Gaithersburg, MD - DC metro Caleb Williams - DC Keilan Robinson - DC Kam Chancellor - Virginia (close enough) Russell Wilson - Virginia (100 miles south of DC metro) Darren Waller - Landover, MD - DC metro Kendall Fuller - Baltimore Vernon Davis - DC Joe Haden - Fort Washington, MD - DC metro Savion Hitler - part of the broader Washington Metro Area region I don't know if you know what a map is or how one works, or even the word "most," but everyone I named aside from Aaron Hernandez is from either the metro itself or close enough.
  22. Shit, you're right. I knew that and I still couldn't stop writing Virginia. Derp.
  23. Phil Kessel and John Daly are men who can never be replicated. They're in their own universe, but somehow are absolutely awesome at their sport.
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