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Gatorubet

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by Gatorubet

  1. Y’all miss some shit tastic football in the swamp. Florida has a 9 point lead with 4;20 and the Bulldogs have a third and 16. Our snowflake defensive back can’t make a fucking tackle and so the guy escapes and gets a first down by a half yard. Bulldog scores td Florida needs to hang on up 2 and get a first down with less than two minutes on the clock. First two running plays we get 9 yards; third and one. What does Sunbelt Billy do? Draws up a passing play where we get sacked and can’t attempt the fourth and one because it’s now fourth and seven. Mississippi State marches down the field after the punt and they’re within the Florida 30 and gonna win with a field goal. Mississippi states regarded coach decides he needs to keep passing even though two run plays and a field goal wins the game. Florida’s ginormous number 99 somehow makes an interception in the flat and Florida wins, very possibly depriving me of Billy being fired tonight. Just a miserable evening
  2. Whoa they are Mr. Salty…. my experience should tell you to wait for the Helobius game prediction to determine your level of pre-game combativeness.
  3. Does the espresso machine in the sleeper have the full nine bars of pressure?
  4. Edit: The video does not show the physical altercation that followed - the Swiss man protecting his wife and two-year-old child from the Russian - but Ivan was arrested by Swiss police and the nation of Ukraine has demanded that the Swiss investigate this criminality, putting pressure on the prosecution.
  5. But….little Nevaeh in South Dakota did not have to compete against a trans athlete.
  6. Yes, the person who started the tariff wars says that China not agreeing to his unilateral imposition of high tariff bullshit is the thing that forced Trump to impose even higher tariffs when his tender, gerbil dick size feelings become hurt at the concept of other countries not doing the stupid things that he says.
  7. I usually tell them that it’s more important for us to discuss our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ than talk about finances. “You have an accent, are you saved?”
  8. ….. but what a glorious 24 hours it was. Years from now I will smile when thinking about that day while eating government cheese.
  9. “Science” is derived from an old Indo-European word that meant, “to do your own research online”.
  10. And that same British photographer went on to worldwide fame for photographing Bigfoot
  11. 3 putt is a gentleman. I’m positive he won’t make jokes when he sees your shrunken balls.
  12. Rubio will probably tell us that, while Trump did have to promise to blow Putin at the next G-8, he held firm on not having to stroke his balls. Advantage Alpha Trump.
  13. Kobylarczyk. Notice that the Latino man did not say, “Shut up, you stupid Polack”! Which may be why he is still employed. Karen 💇 haircut noted.
  14. Drifter, thank you for protecting us all from the looming recession. Your sacrifice is appreciated.
  15. https://share.google/CnvNOX5ywJs46xEw1
  16. Gatorubet

    Getting old sucks

    Or as his neighbors call him, “The Super-Spreader!”
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