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Gatorubet

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by Gatorubet

  1. Hear me out. I think Kyle needs to be boots on the ground as an MP in occupied Gaza. His unique combination of skills (warrior and cultural sensitivity) makes him a natural to patrol the dark streets.
  2. About time to scotch and vape and watch Auburn take it to the dirt burglars. All them Auburn boys is tall…
  3. The orange shit stain has that natural standing lean forward thing going on. It’s like he’s always prepared to cheat off somebody’s paper.
  4. Thank you. Fuckers would not go away - until they did. I will take that W after the Tennessee loss, and I was nervous as hell the first half
  5. World’s people? That sounds DEI as fuck.
  6. I know an attorney named Mr. Justice.
  7. True story. Senator Smoot of Utah introduced a bill to give my great-great grandmother a pension for her husband’s role as a veteran of the Civil War. He (my g-g-gf) obviously forgot to tell his wife something, as it turns out he deserted from the infantry, returned to Michigan, and then accepted a $ bonus to join the cavalry (record keeping was almost not existent, so he was successfully able to do this. I visited the national archives and viewed his actual civil war enlistment records in Washington DC a decade ago). He deserted again when the cavalry was called to duty in Tennessee. He eventually joined the Mormon church and headed out to Idaho to Homestead. Senator Smoot was not the smartest man.
  8. Perhaps it’s time for a military parade to celebrate the victory? Generalissimo Trumpo is probably right in the middle of fitting his new uniform.
  9. it just dawned on me that having my roof replaced in October probably save me a ton of money. And a very experienced Hispanic work crew doing the great work (for the Canadian company owners, as it turns out, in this dada-esque world)) might not be happening right now.
  10. if a post could be described simply by an image.
  11. We need to be careful. There is an excellent chance that the Canadian Mounted Police will strike in the dead of winter - when the rivers are frozen over - and will disguise themselves with American hockey jerseys to enter our houses at night (after politely knocking) and then fill up our breath holes with moss and mud while we sleep.
  12. our fearless leader has a strong tariff game.
  13. I don’t know, I’d be tempted to poke her eye with my finger and yell, “Say it! Say, ‘I yam what I yam…”
  14. “God wants his little men to lose their fingers in the factory spindles, because then they won’t be tempted to put them in a girl’s’ devil orifice when they get older.”
  15. And then there is this: if my current State Farm homeowners insurer ever pulls out of the state or drops me, I will pay the house off just so I won’t have to have some ridiculously overpriced homeowners insurance of last resort to placate my mortgage lender. I will look around and buy some relatively cheap fire insurance. I have fixed my attic to Miami Dade code and put on a new roof with cat 3 shingles and extra nails per shingle. I paid surprisingly little to have them put that waterproof membrane across the entirety of the roof and not just the valleys. So if I no longer have insurance for hurricanes, I can put 3 or 4K in CDs every year so that if I do get hit by a hurricane that causes some damage, I will pay for it myself. i’m willing to risk the tornado threat, which is not nonexistent, but pretty damn close. i’m not sure how bad it is in Texas, but getting affordable homeowners insurance is an extreme problem in Louisiana now that the last legislature repealed the law that said your insurer could not drop you after three years. mine is up for renewal in July, and as I sued them over hurricane Ida, and recovered far more than State Farm said I owed, I am expecting to be dropped.
  16. Well, my five bedroom home’s monthly mortgage is less than the cost of the average apartment in New Orleans. As long as I can make more than 2.7% on my money, I can see no reason to pay my mortgage off. By not doing that (paying off home) I was able to grab some juicy fed i-bonds at almost 7%.
  17. Right after he releases his grades and his taxes.
  18. Never, never, never good to get divorced and lose half your shit late in life. As an old guy working longer than I envisioned post-full Social Security retirement age, my goals are to continue to not have a single dime in credit card or auto loan debt, keep pumping at less 50 K in my solo 401(k), every year (separate from savings and investments) and to keep reminding myself there is no reason to pay off my small mortgage when the interest rate begins with a “2”. One small benefit at keeping working is that Social Security takes your 30 best earnings years every year and re-calculates the figures. it ain’t much, but I’m making about $600 a month more than I would have had I retired at 66. I have the perfect old guy job right now, making six figures but not having any real responsibility - which means I don’t have any stress or anything I can fuck up. I’m trying to make myself as invaluable as possible, because my goal next year is to either retire or preferably tell my employer I will work Tuesday Wednesday Thursday and have a four days weekend every week, in return for 60% of my current compensation. That arrangement would keep me busy and my mind still intellectually stimulated, while allowing me four days a week to woo the wommins du jure on mini Vacays. And I like the idea of continuing to add to my assets before I have to dig into them to live. Plus, I want to have a bigger estate to leave to my two sons. They are gonna have to live in this shit show world after I pass, and I don’t think it’s gonna be as enjoyable as my 30s and 40s were for them.
  19. “The answer has always been right in front of you, you just had to read it for yourself.”
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