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Hornius Emeritus

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Everything posted by Hornius Emeritus

  1. I use a helicopter. It's a little touch and go at busy intersections like 42nd and Broadway, but the helicopters make so much noise and those blades are whipping around real fast and nobody wants to take a chance on being decapitated.
  2. I've been told it's because I touch myself at night.
  3. Make it a 6-star system. The top 10 in the nation are 6 stars. The top 11-100 are 5 stars. The next 101-200 are 4 stars The next 201-300 are 3 stars The next 301-400 are 2 stars The next 401-500 are 1 stars Everybody else gets a scarlet zero to wear on their uniform.
  4. Tyler Van Dyke is a good pickup for them, assuming he's recovered from his ACL tear. Also, I just negged a bunch of you who can't figure out that this is the recruiting board, not the Mack Brown threadcrapping board.
  5. Texas 31 Ohio State 28 Texas 415 yards offense
  6. Carlton's HUDL is very impressive. He's a fluid athlete who can REALLY run and has great agility. Texas NEEDS this young man.
  7. Lightnin' Hopkins and a beautiful Guild guitar.
  8. How much eligibility does Shaw have left?
  9. I just want to say that chili on spaghetti is a crime against all that is good and righteous and wholesome in life and an abominable stain on the very soul of humanity. Carry on.
  10. Shut down Ohio State's rushing game/counters and force Will Howard to beat us.
  11. That's not true. There's one in San Ygnacio, 244 miles from Austin.
  12. Jim Hogg was one of the best governors Texas ever had. His children were remarkable, too.
  13. Did you overlook the fact that the missing weed-whacker belonged to a judge? I think you must have.
  14. I knew my day in the sun would one day come.
  15. Byron Murphy's teammates prank him with a 155k restaurant bill. The look on his face is priceless.
  16. SIAP. DEFINITELY NSFW:
  17. They had him returning punts and kickoffs. In fact, he was the only punt returner they had this year. I doubt they would have him back there if he has trouble catching the football.
  18. SIAP. I love seeing the reaction of the cheerleaders!
  19. I don't think you're understanding what I was saying. This is their biggest win since 1993. That is a true statement. That isn't saying that this is a bigger win than 1993, but that it's their biggest bowl win since then.
  20. They still haven't won the national title this year.
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