The thing to remember when you see Russian's in uniform die, is that they have all made choices, which lead them to their death. They had the choice to refuse conscription (yes, they would have gone to prison, but that's a choice), they had the choice to flee their country (they didn't), they had the choice as mercenaries not to take blood money (they did it anyway), and ultimately, they had the choice to surrender, even to the bitter end (the Ukrainians have repeatedly shown a willingness to accept a surrender) and they didn't do that either. Further, they made the choice to accept their society as it is, and they did nothing about it, they are complicit by proxy to this entire shitshow.
Now, also consider this, these are people in uniform, active combatants, in a war. The Russian's have slaughtered civilians, tens of thousands of them. That these men might not have done it means very little to me at least, as their mere presence on the field perpetuates the Russian continued attack of said civilians.
So when you consider all this, maybe you won't feel so bad about it. While the waste of human lives is an affront to decency, we must also consider the justness of the why.