YGIFS

What, these? These are our everyday balloons and signage. (By the way-the seafood tower was fantastic, I went back for thirds):

Yeah, still think back to the milk carton days. We were raised to believe that millions of kids were just stolen outta the blue by total strangers. My friend's mom was actually in the Chicago audience the day Oprah had that guy on in the 80's saying hundreds of thousands of kids were just being randomly abducted all over the country. Turned out to be total bullshit. -Missing kids, 95% of the time it's a relative or family friend that takes them. not the dude in the windowless van. -Missing adults, 95% of the time---they wanted to disappear. If you live in a city with more than 10,000 people...every single day you walk/drive past somebody who is "missing." Even in this digital footprint age, it is so much easier to go off the grid than most people realize. We have all met dozens of people over the years who were "missing", but we just didn't know it because they seemed completely "normal."

That's a weird story. I don't know why he struck me as being about my age and similar lack of maturity. Looks like he was significantly older. I would not have guessed fighting people at the YMCA, but Aggie gonna Aggie. Yeah, even from my deranged ass...that dude always seemed unhinged. But I hope he went painlessly and is in a better place. One of the reasons I like this place. We can all bullshit and pontificate and bloviate (Lord knows I'm leading that charge), but there are good friends on here. Folks I've helped IRL, and folks who've helped me through some shit, IRL. Most message boards and social media are just absolutely toxic. Seemed like Branding Iron was trying to let some shit out, but didn't know how. There is more connectivity than ever given technology and travel, but yet we are more isolated and alone. We still have the same percentage of mentally ill, addicted, and suicide as we did 100 years ago despite all the helpful resources being more available than ever. In the end, broadcast your shit to get it off your chest and listen to people in distress. And play and watch baseball whenever you can. I played some format of baseball for every day of my childhood and even Fall Ball for Stetson University. There isn't a game that goes by where I don't learn something new about the pastime and how it's a reflection of real life. Like it was conveniently placed upon our laps 150 years ago when we needed it most. Augie was right, it is at once the most cruel and most beautiful life experience all at the same time. May Schloss carry that torch, onward...through the fog.

You know these sibling cop murder cover-ups just remind me that me and brother never do anything together anymore, dammit.

He was definitely crazy, but seemed to be (but who really knows with all our online bullshit) about my age. Based on some references he made. Hope it was painless since it was probably before his time. Anyway, back to 'Baseball Law'........

I get all my advice from my friend's cousin's ex-boyfriend's nephew who works at 31 Flavors. My work takes me into some precarious environs. I learned awhile back there is another world that runs parallel to the one most of us know and with which we feel comfortable. There's another one beyond that in which I caught a glimpse or two and it scared the living shit out of me. I imagine there's more beyond that, but I don't have the stomach for it anymore. The things and people that hide in plain sight are what initially intrigued me, but I saw more than I cared to witness. The thing that sent me over the ledge was when I learned how narcotics (recreational drugs, fentanyl, etc.) are distributed around our country. Yeah, it comes across our borders or ports illegally by some fake-documented guy in a busted up Honda Odyssey who doesn't have much to lose and gets a nice payday if it works. But the brown dude who can't read English street signs doesn't take it all the way to Chicago or Dallas or Boston. There are sorting hubs all over Texas, protected by law enforcement. They then head out behind a normal looking U.S. Citizen in a normal looking car with proper tags, they look like they're doing highway patrol. Then a trooper from the next state picks up the tail and lags behind. And hands it off to the next state line. And so on and so on. It works amazingly well and everybody involved gets a nice bonus. Once I saw behind that curtain, I thought, "I'm good. Y'all take care. I don't need to spend the rest of my life looking over my shoulder. But kudos on the efficient logistics." That, and the best man at Dad's first marriage was married to Sam Giancan's daughter (Boss of Chicago) and was his hit man for many years. Spent decades in federal prison, but gave me some pointers when we'd visit him at the holidays.

Whatever happened to that guy? I'm sure I'm getting this story wrong, but I think about 10 years ago, he had some kind of mental/physical breakdown. He'd come over and troll on LFZ/HF back in the day, and I thought he was just an extremely annoying Aggie. But IIRC, he had some serious shit go down awhile back which would explain his lack of online presence. Or maybe he just grew up and saw the light. Dunno. He was more annoying than Liucci and any other 10 texags posters put together, but there was something always a little off about him. CDC talked about this briefly after the presser on Wednesday. Still shuffling through some plans for that driveway between the tennis center and LF. Outfield seating, maybe an elevated deck. They want to make it a back-end priority of the capital campaign that is still underway. But he was adamant that a re-do of the main concourse from 3b to home 1b gets a massive overhaul, plus the LF food truck area and that 1b line 'hospitality' tent that doesn't really serve a purpose anymore. Those will start sooner rather than later, but the OF project will probably only get the money and break ground in the very last year of the Capital Campaign. There's just too much other shit going on in East Campus right now to make that a priority. But I'd bet you'll see the baseline projects at DFF start after the 2025 season.

Dem titties be rouge. -Did you say "rouge" I meant rude. But her face be all rouge. What were we talking about again. (I like how no effort was made to hide those perfect nipples, somebody slipped one by the editor, I mean nipped. Wait, no...I meant slipped)

Yeah, this California thing is kind of a self-perpetuating myth. Austin is a great example of it. Five years ago, the RPT/Abbott/Patrick could't shut the fuck up about how all these blue state coastal elites were coming to Texas to save money and dilute our conservative voting base. Then, all of a sudden, it's conservatively-principled Californians fleeing a Blue State oppressive regime for the liberty and opportunity that only the Texas Miracle can provide. Well which one is it? Because I know and work with hundreds of them and they're the same fucking people they were 5 years ago. California has some batshit lunatic, far-left elected officials. But it also gave this country Nixon and Reagan, two hardnose conservatives. Governor Arnold wasn't that long ago. Nor was Pete Wilson. Yes, the Bay Area and signifiant portions of the L.A. MSA are too extreme for much of America. And the whole state has to play by the rules of a solidly-left Sacramento. But much of that state is quite moderate. It had more Trump voters than Texas did in 2020. You go below IH-80 and east of IH-5, and then the NE region.........those massive tracks of land and millions of people make East Texas look downright liberally enlightened.

Well, I don't have the agency-oriented legal prowess of some of you; but we've done some decent-sized mineral/royalties deals and interact with the Railroad Commission and EPA on a regular basis. And I can tell you this, when I think of subsurface hydrocarbon expertise, I think of Brett Kavanaugh doing a keg stand.

Wait, the physical version of the wooden paddle with the ball on the string, or like the early video game console that had the dials so you could play "Pong"? And to Neonmoon's point-----can somebody please tell me where this Civil War be taking place? I want to make sure I have something nice to wear. I can't remember his name, but at the time, he was the head of the FBI's counter-terrorism unit. It had gotten a robust amount of resources and funding after the first bombing of the WTC in the 1990's. Before that, it was all focused on the USSR. Anyway, he died just a few years ago. But he gave this interview to Esquire in the mid 2000's, where he recounts picking up bits and pieces here and there of what he felt like could be a potential attack on high value targets in the U.S. in the early 2000's. He didn't have enough to go on, but he was the first one to take note that it was weird that were these young Middle Eastern men on work visas, renting apartments and taking flying courses in small towns in Florida and Minnesota. And he said something to the effect of, "We got complacent. But I knew we were just fucking due." We are, as a nation, once again, very complacent and accepting of completely insane banalities. We are due for something bad, something internal. I am not worried about violence in the streets, the Mason-Dixon line, Confederates and Seditionists, what gives me pause is precisely that there is no demarkation. they don't know who to fight, who to shoot, where to do it, and for what 'leader', they just want somebody to suffer to validate their woeful ignorance. I have battled many foes, smart and powerful. I have lived many lives and served many masters. But as history has taught me, the guy I worry about the most is the one in the corner with nothing left to lose. He beats me more often than not. Again, our prize mistake-failure of imagination.

Yes, I realize now that it was a holiday party. But I'm only seeing now, in June, for the first time. To be fair to me, you have to admit Liucci seems like the kinda guy that does karaoke to Creed every week of the year.

I would trade the entire Freedom Caucus (plus Boebert's ex-husband) for one dishonorably discharged Ukrainian E-1 and some packing tape.

Solid plan, but two big issues. It doesn't take care of the teeth. And wastewater plants have lots and lots of cameras and security in the United States. In this day and age, it is so incredibly easy to find, given their digital footprint, where people buy their groceries, get takeout, buy drinks, and obtain prescription drugs. We're finding better success with just tampering with what they're going to ingest with horrifying amounts of fentanyl. Yeah, it sucks when family members find the body, but it's so much cleaner than dragging a body out to a river or basin or trying to burn it without being seen. They do a toxicology run, and it looks like the person simply overdosed on a problematic substance, not some exotic poison. You use a burner phone beforehand to text them that you've got their requested "party supplies." They hit ignore, but it's logged at the cell carrier. Have a middle-man follow them to see when they get a to-go order from a restaurant or leave their cart unattended in the aisle while they run and grab something else, or actually do get narcotics. Sprinkle it in while nobody is looking. Better yet, those shelves that every fast-food/fast-casual restaurant has with the labeled bags waiting to be picked up by a door-dash guy or the person themselves. You make like you're looking for your order...sprinkle in the fentanyl, and just grab some napkins instead and head out. The most effective killers are nowhere near the victim 24 hours prior and 24 hours afterwards. The most effective way to get rid of a dead body is to have EMT or a Coroner handle it for you. It would shock most people if they knew how even in the age of CSI: Tucson or whatever, how easy it is to disappear people.

Name is Garmin, Fred Garmin. Male prostitute. /danaykroyd

Billy Luici covering a Creed love ballad during the week we got their baseball coach. We are in the strangest fucking timeline.

Beating a dead horse as Lobo is wont to do. Just gotta get a few million of Trump's middle 25mm voter bloc to sit this out in a few states that don't have any high profile races down-ballot (Gov, Sen., et. al.). Last night didn't help at all, it made them think "Hey, he's a convicted asshole but he sounded like the bold guy I liked in 2016 & 2020. Honey, get out my voter registration card. We're gonna vote for him after all." Meanwhile the DNC is worried about how the 9 college kids who actually vote in Michigan feel about Biden's stance on Gaza.

First thing I do when I go into a hotel room is get out two chlorox wipes from my travel pack. One for the remote/telephone/desk/doorknobs/closet handles. And then one for the bathroom fixtures. People think I'm a crazy germaphobe, but it takes maybe 90 seconds. There are literally 1000 hotel rooms around this country, and another 100 abroad that I have jerked off in and then touched something like the bathroom door, washcloth, faucet, tissue box, remote, etc. And I'm a sickie, but there are millions of travelers filthier than me. So next time you're at the Dallas Crescent watching your wife rinse off her makeup with a washcloth, know there's a little bit of my boys on her face. I subscribe to the notion that you need some exposure to germs to build up a healthy immune system. But sadly for the tough Alpha Males out there, that line of medical thinking doesn't apply to amount of semen generously strewn about this nation's business hotels. Do yourself a solid, pack some sanitary wipes. UNTIL NEXT TIME....................

Yeah, I get it. There's a reason "Look at my wonderful staff and cabinet!" has never been a highly run messaging effort in 99% of campaigns.

Man, that was only about 10+ miles from where I spent most of my childhood. We probably found the same smut mags in the forest preserve at some point. Yeah, I don't know or why they started arriving at my house...but one day they just did. My mom would just toss 'em in the trash with the other junkmail and I'd go fish it out in the middle of the night. And then Matt R. found his older brother's Adam & Eve porno catalogs. So we called into the number and signed up to receive them. I don't know how I managed to intercept them since I was usually the last one home each day. Maybe everybody else in the house just threw 'em out or didn't say anything. I'm sure my brilliant 15yo brain came up with some kinda alias. It was basically just still shots of sex toys and porno shoots. To Racquel Darrian....you 'da real MVP!

Someone mentioned upthread the incomprehensible gap between being a President and running for President. I think Biden has done an absolutely amazing job of building an administration around very capable people who can handle tough shit and look good doing it. He can't run on that, because it makes him seem feeble and not truly in charge. But he's getting shit done by having great people do great stuff. Well, cat's outta the bag now DNC. Joe's done a fine enough job making himself look feeble. May as well pivot to his team and record, what the fuck else do you have to lose?

Yeah, Biden's performance aside. I'll give Trump this. He was loud, lying, brash, inaccurate, completely full of shit, offensive, incorrect, disgusting, pouty, and displaying signs of cognitive decay. But he's consistent. It was exactly the Trump his people wanted to see and adore. And he delivered. He played all his greatest hits of bullshit, and did with a smile and energy. Bad news is his middle 25mm voting bloc, some of them just reinvigorated to still register to vote instead of sitting this one out in a few key states. "Hey, he's still the same lying asshole I liked in 2016 and 2020. Maybe I will register after all, this could be fun."

What time is that ruling expected? Or, more accurately---what time is a law clerk in heels expected to run down the steps and wave some stuff around above her head? He won't do shit. the DNC will probably send a congratulatory edible arrangement to Trump after he's off the hook. The only guy with any balls left in this fight is Jack Smith and he's being neutered at every turn and shown no support whatsoever because "that wouldn't indicate impartiality."

Trump was old and fat, but happened to capture lightning in a bottle in 2016 between his ego, the politically sidelined white stupids, Obama leaving office, etc. Biden was already old, but was so juiced in by the Clinton/Obama Democratic machine, he was picked to end the madness of Trump. The Republicans fell completely in lock-step with Trump from 2021 to 2024. The Democrats had that same span of time to let Joe surround himself with very capable people to take care of some very serious issues, and they did just that. They also had that same timespan to groom and introduce a new candidate for 2024 that wouldn't undermine Joe's efforts on important goals. There is a way to do that, and they fucked it up at every turn. So this is what we get. Obviously not as significant as POTUS, but there are very substantial institutions, corporations, lower elected offices, etc. that have someone take the reins while a younger person is prepped for taking over in the intermediate-term timeline. It's a delicate balance but there are tens of thousands of examples of how it can be done effectively. But nope, the Democratic party said, "Yeah, we're 50/50 with a convicted felon and rapist...we could plan ahead...or we could just take the coin toss."

What the fuck is 'Lesbian Feta', is that like when a female Aggie member of the Corps of Cadets goes down on a Ewe while studying abroad in Athens? Also, pos rep to RPM for the Spiegel catalog. This was later in their run, but gives you a sense of what great joy it brought to junior high boys in the tri-state area: