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BurntOrangeCrush

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by BurntOrangeCrush

  1. I've studied genealogy extensively. Based on the facts above going back to 1032, your wife and her family come from a long line of Albanian peasantry. No charge, fellow surly member.
  2. Gomer Pile Driver and the Tea Baggers
  3. Aggy sucks harder than Candi. Hook 'em!
  4. Those aggy jerseys are missing the words "agricultural and mechanical"
  5. An aggy and a longhorn grad are visiting Alaska and stop in a bar to get a drink. This loudmouth Alaskan asks them where they are from, and he says "We Alaskans are the only real men. We can drink a fifth of whiskey, wrestle a bear, and have sex with a woman in under an hour". Aggy calls bullshit, so the Alaskan downs a fifth of jack, grabs a girl at the end of the bar and takes her out back and nails her, then they hear howling out in the woods as he wrestles a grizzly. He walks back in and said "I told ya so". The UT grad says he can do that, so he does the same things and with just a minute to spare, he limps in the bar after completing the 3 tasks, but needs an ambulance. aggy says "give me a bottle of jack"! and he downs it quickly. There are no girls in the bar, so he heads out into the woods. Again, they hear alot of crying and screaming, and then he walks into bar, bloody and limping. He says, "Ok, I have 20 minutes left. Where is this woman you want me to wrestle?"
  6. Great win! Thanks to all for providing updates
  7. Who gives a shit about what people think about the Big 12 vs sec? The only problem that the Horns have is that they have been shitty and have made dicey coaching and AD hires. All elite programs have fallen of the cliff at times. But make no mistake we will be back. Because we're Texas. JFC we are getting elite recruiting classes despite horrible on-field results. At Texas, we will always get great recruits. We need great coaching and leadership. We're certainly not aggy, who has to make up mythical championships to display on the stadium or hire a recruiter who tries to awkwardly relate to the young kids that Chris Hansen will be interviewing him on a Dateline Special coming soon. We're not 2nd tier program that depends on others in the conference to be good so we can have cred for victories. Simply put, conference rankings don't mean shit. Texas wins all of their games, or just wins the Big 12, we will be in the final four. And that doesn't change if every Big 12 team is mediocre or how strong the sec is. Therefore, we don't have to resort to trying to sell how strong the Big 12 is or root for the other conference teams so we can scream "Big 12! Big 12!". I hate all other Big 12 teams. You know, because they are fighting us in the fucking standings. AND...Texas is paid more than any school with the additional funds from the LHN. Suck it.
  8. Poison. Particularly Bret Michaels. His lyrics seem like they were written by a 7th grader. The guitarist is quite possibly the worst live performer I have ever seen.
  9. Thanks for the rec, I will check it out
  10. I was a young adult when Nirvana came out. It's useless to argue about what bands are great. Everyone has different tastes. I always loved hard rock/metal, grew up in the MTV era where they actually played videos, and got to listen to different types of music that I never would have sought ought before. Nirvana changed the landscape. They were different, original, and I respect the hell out of them. That being said, I thought their songs were catchy and I bought their cd's, but they just didn't do a lot for me. I liked Alice in Chains over Nirvana. Liked the heaviness, and Layne Staley's voice/lyrics were awesome. I was never a "college radio" guy so that has something to do with it. I was AC/DC-Metallica-Megadeth-Slayer-Maiden etc...so Nirvana just didn't register for me as much as some.
  11. When I finally wash my truck and the next morning I see that a squadron of birds have carpet bombed the hood and windshield.
  12. "ass, my dude". Stop saying that. It's annoying as fuck (AF for you youngsters)
  13. Disagree. She will say that it's the fault of the referees or offer some kind of conspiracy that the ACC made this happen because they are angry that the best football coach in college football history left the conference. Then she will scratch her cat, post some more pics of Jimbo and how hot he is, whip out the clit-beaters and call it a night.
  14. aggy recruiting mods and fans have never seen or talked about a recruiting class that wasn't ranked in the top 5 before the football season starts. Ever.
  15. That's better than your wife calling Monty Python and the Holy Grail "stupid" but I feel your pain.
  16. Welcome aboard Jared! Hook 'em!
  17. This morning...I have been sick all week and still in bed. Wife comes back in the bedroom and says she is going shopping and I tell her to take all the time she needs as I was going to relax and try to get better and just watch movies and take meds. I love my wife, but when I am sick I like to be left alone: Her: Whatcha gonna watch? Me: I don't know (but please just go shop with your friends and leave me alone) Her: Don't watch any of our Netflix shows without me here Me: ok (please quit talking I don't feel good) Her: Are you going to take a nap? Me: Maybe (I'm not sure, but I know I won't be napping while you are still here talking) Her: ok, when I get back when we can watch something together Me: great! (not really) She gets home and I am halfway thru watching my favorite movie The Holy Grail: Her: Watcha watching? Me: Monty Python and the Holy Grail Her: You watch that alot over the years. How come you don't watch it with me? Me: because you won't like it. (we have different tastes. "Pitch Perfect" and "Bridesmaids" are her Holy Grail) Her: Start from the beginning and let me catch up So I start it over and we get to the castle scene where they are arguing about European swallows. At that point, she says: Her: This is stupid Almost a deal breaker for me.....
  18. During the last few minutes (start at 2:47 ) where he is talking about how he has changed and he regrets his mistakes, I could have sworn I have heard that before.
  19. Excellent news. Hook 'em!🤘
  20. Welcome to the 40 Hudson! Hook 'em!
  21. Great news! Hook 'em Tyler
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