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Carl Spackler

Burnt Ends
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Everything posted by Carl Spackler

  1. The sound of that aggy clown jizzing in his pants as he watched his simulated TD celebration was both comedy gold and disturbing at the same time.
  2. Home Depot dude at 1:00:54 of that video is my hero.
  3. Apparently their cohort, Phil McCracken, managed to evade arrest.
  4. FWIW, the misspelled reference to Liucci & Co. as "staph" actually fits.
  5. You're . . . welcome? Do I get some kind of $ reward for it? Like maybe a cut of Kern's NIL money? That should work out to about $1.29.
  6. He was ranked as a top 5 punter coming out of HS and averaged 46+ his senior year, so I question whether we can definitely say that he doesn't have the talent or leg. You're basing your conclusion on a freshman season in which he's been injured for at least part of the time. If you applied the same reasoning in 2015, you would have been ready and willing to cut Dickson loose. That said, as I said in another post, I would have absolutely no problem with portaling in a proven, experienced punter in '25. Texas should always be looking to improve at every position if possible.
  7. So now that overrated, untested Texas squad is actually way more talented than the the aggy players that were part of highly-rated recruiting classes because we spent boatloads of NIL money. I swear, I need a program to keep up with the changing narrative on TexAgs.
  8. I would have no problem with that plan. And for the record, I never said I think Kern has the potential to be "great down the road." I said it's reasonable to expect that he'll improve over his performance this season, which is something different.
  9. He averaged 45+ in the UTSA and ULM games, but I honestly don't recall if those were on the fly or due to getting good bounces. He averaged 46+ as a HS senior. So apparently he's got the ability to lift it better than the 40 he has averaged this season. But he certainly hasn't been booming anything this year, esp. since his injury.
  10. Sorry -- I should have phrased it differently. He's a lock to enter the portal, so he's all but gone at this point. I should have written, "I forgot that he's leaving the program."
  11. I'd say that's a legit question based on his performance since being hurt. He started the season off somewhat shaky (CSU, Michigan), which is understandable given that he's a true frosh. But then he seemed to be settling in (UTSA, ULM) and hitting the ball better. Unfortunately, he got hurt right around the Mississippi State game. Since coming back after the Georgia game, Kern just hasn't seemed explosive at all with his punts, so I wonder if whatever caused him to sit a couple games might still be affecting him on some level. FWIW, I'm not sure that the blocked punt in the A&M game wasn't Kern's fault. His protectors all blocked to their right and the left wing peeled off downfield and didn't bother to block, which would suggest that the call was for Kern to slide right and punt the ball on the move. But Kern punted straight on, which allowed the rusher (who had free rein due to the left wing taking off) to easily get to the contact spot and practically take the ball off Kern's foot. If that was the case, then it was a mental mistake on Kern's part. It's either that or the wing completely fucked up. The punting has definitely been subpar this season. But I wouldn't panic. Recall that Kern was considered one of the top 5 HS punters coming out of school, i.e., he has the requisite talent and leg. It's reasonable to expect that he'll improve as he gets experience and completely recovers from whatever physical ailments he has. Even the great Michael Dickson struggled his first season -- remember the snap against Okie Lite that went through Dickson's hands and hit him right in the facemask? But Dickson improved dramatically after his first season and became arguably the greatest punter in UT history. Am I suggesting that Kern is Dickson part deux? Not at all. I'm simply saying that it's reasonable to expect that Kern will improve. Ah, that's right. I forgot that he left the program.
  12. Do we really know that at this point, though? Or could it be a situation in which they've simply been stuck behind older, more experienced DTs with NFL-level talent (Sweat, Murphy, Collins, Broughton) as well as older, more experienced portal additions (Lole, Norton, et al.), and they might actually show some ability once they're given a chance next season? I'm not arguing one way or the other -- I'm just questioning whether we can definitively label those two players busts in light of the circumstances I described.
  13. You had to have been loving life at that point. I hope it made it worth having to put up with aggy in-laws the other 364 days of the year.
  14. As I understand it, there are basically two types of targeting under NCAA rules: (1) leading with the crown of the helmet while making forcible contact; or (2) making forcible contact with the head or neck area of a defenseless opponent with the helmet. The first type of targeting was not committed by Mukuba because he didn't lead with the crown of his helmet. The second type was not committed because the opponent player was not defenseless as defined by the rulebook.
  15. Sir, we have identified your problem.
  16. It's even funnier when you watch Zuhn get stood up and knocked back on that play.
  17. Was it approximately 18 years ago? Cuz if it was . . .
  18. Breathlessly waiting for Graham Harmon to rank Texas 7th in the SEC due to an obviously deficient redzone offense and punt protection scheme.
  19. Only to certain posters.
  20. Try not to piss your pants publicly like this. It's unmanly.
  21. Absolutely dominating this game and only up 10 points. Fuuuuccccckkkkkkkkk. The only fucking thing that can beat us is turnovers, and Ewers keeps fucking turning the goddam ball over.
  22. Not disagreeing with you. Just saying he has the capacity to improve. With Bert, he's reached his ceiling & we pretty much know what we're getting.
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