I don't think I've ever mentioned this before so apologies if I have. I have an estranged uncle. For whatever reason he wants nothing to do with me or my family. I've seen him maybe twice in the last 25 years, once at my grandpa's funeral and once at a family get together. He allegedly told his kids (my cousins) early in their life that we didn't want anything to do with them so I've had no relationship with them at all. It wasn't until a few years ago that my sister reached out to them and learned this. I have wanted to meet them more and get to know them because....I mean come on man they're family. I have 5 first-cousins in total and my uncle's side has 3 of them. My other cousins I know them, their spouses, when they graduated high school, when they graduated college, their interests, etc. I know nothing about my uncle's kids. We went to one of their weddings and I brought my wife with me. On the drive home the first thing she said was "wow that was awkward, they acted like they didn't really know you". I had to tell her that was kind of true. They don't really know me and I don't really know them. My grandma wasn't at the wedding. She lives alone 7 hours away but we have the same experience. She doesn't really know them. We've tried multiple times to meet up and things always fall apart for one reason or another. I finally said to myself you know what if they want to know me they can reach out to me.
I bring all of this up because one of my cousins is pregnant. My grandma is about to become a great grandmother. I have no idea if she's going to make an attempt to be there for the delivery. When I was born my dad recorded her and my grandpa literally sprinting into the hospital and grabbing me from the nurse's arms because they wanted to hold me. They were so in love with me as a baby. It just breaks my heart that this baby won't get to experience the kind of love and affection I got from her when I was born. I only had 1 great grandparent alive while my mom was pregnant but she (the great grandparent) passed away 2 months before I was born. I wish she got to see me and hold me. Breaks my heart man. Thanks for reading this.