Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Posted

The one chair works great unless she’s one of Vic’s girls. Now she had free pass to sit on his lap or she can sit at his feet looking up at him adoringly. Strong move. 

Unless he pussed out sat on sand at her feet so she’d be “comfy”. 

Posted (edited)
6 hours ago, Nolacycling said:

Called lady friend to go to beach for full moon tonight.

Me: Do you want me to bring a chair for you?

Her: No thanks, I'll sit on sand.

Upon arrival, I pull out my chair.

Her: Oh, you have a chair, you should of said something.

Me: I did.

Her: You should have told me you were going to have one.

Me: Do you want to move by the lifeguard stand and sit on the steps?

Her: No, I'll be fine.

So you thought you’d bring a chair while she sat on the sand next to you? Seems like a weird move for a romantic trip to the beach. I think your options were to sit with her in the sand or two chairs. 

Edited by Pig Bellmont
Posted
6 hours ago, Nolacycling said:

Called lady friend to go to beach for full moon tonight.

Me: Do you want me to bring a chair for you?

Her: No thanks, I'll sit on sand.

Upon arrival, I pull out my chair.

Her: Oh, you have a chair, you should of said something.

Me: I did.

Her: You should have told me you were going to have one.

Me: Do you want to move by the lifeguard stand and sit on the steps?

Her: No, I'll be fine.

She’s used to me bringing the blanket

Posted
58 minutes ago, Pig Bellmont said:

So you thought you’d bring a chair while she sat on the sand next to you? Seems like a weird move for a romantic trip to the beach. I think your options were to sit with her in the sand or two chairs. 

100% this.

Posted
22 minutes ago, Saint Austin said:

100% this.

My first thought was he thought he'd need the chair for when she gets on her knees for the "romantic full moon on the beach hummer" because he didn't want to stand or lay in the sand for it.

Posted
Yea being a bitch is tough.

I do everything. Mop, toilets, laundry, bake, house repairs, car repairs, trash. Wash kids, change diapers, braid hair, cook, clean, dishes. I don’t give a shit what chore it is. I just do it.

During Texas football, everyone can watch with me or fuck off.
Posted
1 hour ago, Pig Bellmont said:

So you thought you’d bring a chair while she sat on the sand next to you? Seems like a weird move for a romantic trip to the beach. I think your options were to sit with her in the sand or two chairs. 

Or bring an inflatable mattress.

Posted
8 hours ago, Nolacycling said:

Called lady friend to go to beach for full moon tonight.

Me: Do you want me to bring a chair for you?

Her: No thanks, I'll sit on sand.

Upon arrival, I pull out my chair.

Her: Oh, you have a chair, you should of said something.

Me: I did.

Her: You should have told me you were going to have one.

Me: Do you want to move by the lifeguard stand and sit on the steps?

Her: No, I'll be fine.

Something, something sandy vagina something.

Posted

Wife calling me at work.....................

Mrs. Hoffa- Do you think I should buy the boys medium swimming suits? 

Me- I think that would be fine, isn't that what they wear now?

Mrs- Yes

Me- Perfect, I will talk to....

Mrs.- I should probably get them a new set of goggles too, I need to double check what else is on the list, do you remember if we need...........

 

FUCK MY LIFE I AM SHOPPING WITH MY WIFE AND I AM NOT EVEN AT THE FUCKING STORE WITH HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Like 6
Posted
1 minute ago, JimmyHoffa said:

Wife calling me at work.....................

Mrs. Hoffa- Do you think I should buy the boys medium swimming suits? 

Me- I think that would be fine, isn't that what they wear now?

Mrs- Yes

Me- Perfect, I will talk to....

Mrs.- I should probably get them a new set of goggles too, I need to double check what else is on the list, do you remember if we need...........

 

FUCK MY LIFE I AM SHOPPING WITH MY WIFE AND I AM NOT EVEN AT THE FUCKING STORE WITH HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You should drop a: "Since we're out, let's stop and pick up some liquor after we finish with the swimming stuff."

  • Like 6
  • Haha 1
Posted
Wife calling me at work.....................

Mrs. Hoffa- Do you think I should buy the boys medium swimming suits? 

Me- I think that would be fine, isn't that what they wear now?

Mrs- Yes

Me- Perfect, I will talk to....

Mrs.- I should probably get them a new set of goggles too, I need to double check what else is on the list, do you remember if we need...........

 

FUCK MY LIFE I AM SHOPPING WITH MY WIFE AND I AM NOT EVEN AT THE FUCKING STORE WITH HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stop talking to my wife you asshole!

 

 

I'm so numb to my wife starting a sentence with "I need"

Posted
2 hours ago, Wiler77 said:

Right now she's logging into Surly to start a thread called "boyfriends and the stupid shit they do"

Yep. Gave the lets 'cuddle' on a blanket at the beach signal and Nola brought himself a chair instead. 

Posted
2 hours ago, Nivek said:


I do everything. Mop, toilets, laundry, bake, house repairs, car repairs, trash. Wash kids, change diapers, braid hair, cook, clean, dishes. I don’t give a shit what chore it is. I just do it.

During Texas football, everyone can watch with me or fuck off.

So...what does she do? You do all the household chores and take care of the kids, and you’re married, so we know it’s not sex you’re receiving in return. What’s the upside here?

Posted
9 minutes ago, Frank The Tank said:

So...what does she do? You do all the household chores and take care of the kids, and you’re married, so we know it’s not sex you’re receiving in return. What’s the upside here?

Pooper

Posted
You should drop a: "Since we're out, let's stop and pick up some liquor after we finish with the swimming stuff."

Honey, since we are out lets get some Anal lube, duct tape, shovel, lye, and some chloroform.
Posted
So...what does she do? You do all the household chores and take care of the kids, and you’re married, so we know it’s not sex you’re receiving in return. What’s the upside here?

Money. The upside is that my house isn’t filthy from 3 kids. Even if there is marker art on a wall.
Posted
8 minutes ago, General Specific said:


With a list like that, why spring for the lube? Seems like over kill here.

The Lube is in case he wants to stuff her in a barrel and it is a tight fit.  She might be a Vic special.

Posted
4 hours ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Stop talking to my wife you asshole!

 

 

I'm so numb to my wife starting a sentence with "I need"

When it comes to phone calls, my wife starts every sentence with "Um". I've gotten numb to it over the years.

Posted
51 minutes ago, demos said:


I dunno; throwing a load in the dishwasher is pretty easy.

Especially if that's what you call banging your wife

(speaking from experience)

  • Like 3
Posted

Hey we should watch the right stuff with the kids. Its long but I think the boys would be into it, 50th anniversary and all. 

Whats that? Never seen it.

Is it about new kids on the block?

fuck my life  

 

  • Like 2
  • Haha 2
Posted
1 hour ago, Anastasis said:

Hey we should watch the right stuff with the kids. Its long but I think the boys would be into it, 50th anniversary and all. 

Whats that? Never seen it.

Is it about new kids on the block?

fuck my life  

 

Is she hot?  She must be hot.

Posted
Called lady friend to go to beach for full moon tonight.
Me: Do you want me to bring a chair for you?
Her: No thanks, I'll sit on sand.
Upon arrival, I pull out my chair.
Her: Oh, you have a chair, you should of said something.
Me: I did.
Her: You should have told me you were going to have one.
Me: Do you want to move by the lifeguard stand and sit on the steps?
Her: No, I'll be fine.

Rookie. You should have brought at least 3 extra chairs in case she didn’t like the first two extra ones that she didn’t want in the first place.
  • Like 2
Posted
On 7/17/2019 at 10:46 AM, Nivek said:

I do everything. Mop, toilets, laundry, bake, house repairs, car repairs, trash. Wash kids, change diapers, braid hair, cook, clean, dishes. I don’t give a shit what chore it is. I just do it.

During Texas football, everyone can watch with me or fuck off.

 

On 7/17/2019 at 12:54 PM, Frank The Tank said:

So...what does she do? You do all the household chores and take care of the kids, and you’re married, so we know it’s not sex you’re receiving in return. What’s the upside here?

 

D-m-k9-NW4-AA21n-K-format-jpg-name-mediu

 

  • Like 4
  • Haha 1
Posted


That is some passive aggressive bullshit. He should use that poster to light his grill.

Fuck that, burn it ALL down, house and everything in it... take the kids and run!!!!

This is just the start... of the public list.

How many gold stars she give you when you make her orgasm?

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.



×
×
  • Create New...