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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do

Spur08

By Spur08
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Modessit

Modessit 5603

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Last Wednesday I came down with a very mild case of the flu. Nothing more than a sporadic fever and aches, easily controllable by Tylenol. I knew it was the flu because I was exposed to it the weekend before visiting my dad in the hospital, and I figured it was mild because I already had a flu shot. All I needed to do was wait for the proverbial 5-7 days to pass but wife was nagging me everyday to go to the doctor and get tested, even if it never got worse. She and the kids never got sick. I called the doctor's nurse and she said it sounded so mild that I probably wasn't that contagious, especially since I wasn't sneezing or coughing. Just wait it out and come see us if it gets worse.
I started feeling better yesterday but she kept STILL nagging so today I went in to see the doctor. They agreed with me and basically told me we were both wasting our time but laughed when I said I was there to keep my wife happy. 
Get home this afternoon and report back to Ms CL.
Ms CL: Did you get tested for the flu?
Me: No, they didn't even mention it. They said that I didn't appear ill. 
Ms CL: Why didn't you ask to be tested?
Me: I guess because they could tell I was no longer sick?
Ms CL: Well how am I supposed to know if you actually had the flu? What if I catch it from you? 
Me: Because it's all gone now. Wouldn't you have already caught it by now if it were going to happen?
yada yada yada... TONE
In the future:

Wife: Did you get tested?

You: Yes.

Wife: And?

You: They said, "You're fine and tell your wife to quit wasting our time."
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T’Boo Ted Marshall

T’Boo Ted Marshall 2732

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We decided to give one of those telematics devices a try to lower our car insurance rates. We’ve had no tickets or accidents so I just wanted to see if we could get it lower.
During a 90 day period they measure the times of day you drive(12-4 am is bad), rapid acceleration(not speed) and hard braking.
My wife says I drive crazy but to me I keep up with the flow of traffic in Dallas.

After one week she has 8 hard braking events. I have zero.

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Flg8rfan

Flg8rfan 201

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We decided to give one of those telematics devices a try to lower our car insurance rates. We’ve had no tickets or accidents so I just wanted to see if we could get it lower.
During a 90 day period they measure the times of day you drive(12-4 am is bad), rapid acceleration(not speed) and hard braking.
My wife says I drive crazy but to me I keep up with the flow of traffic in Dallas.

After one week she has 8 hard braking events. I have zero.

Back when they only gave you one, my wife handed it to me and said I was our last hope for a discount
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Francisco 2.0

Francisco 2.0 32395

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10 hours ago, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:

We decided to give one of those telematics devices a try to lower our car insurance rates. We’ve had no tickets or accidents so I just wanted to see if we could get it lower.
During a 90 day period they measure the times of day you drive(12-4 am is bad), rapid acceleration(not speed) and hard braking.
My wife says I drive crazy but to me I keep up with the flow of traffic in Dallas.

After one week she has 8 hard braking events. I have zero.

When my daughter was a senior, I put one of those on her car.  She has always been a responsible driver, but I wanted to see if it did, by chance, lower the rate.  I was upfront with her; told her what this device did, and showed her that I (and the insurance company) could monitor her driving habits.  I told her not to think about it, and just drive like she had been driving all along.  I also made the ex aware of this, given that A) I paid for the car and B) I alone was paying the insurance and registration on the car, along with the maintenance.  To my surprise, the ex was receptive of the idea as well; I figured she would have screamed something about "spying on our child" to me.

In the 90 day period, she had zero hard braking attempts.  She may have had 4 or 5 rapid acceleration events.  It was pretty boring; I'd say roughly 3/4 of her driving was 1 mile to school, and then home each day.  There was some "late" night driving, when coming home from a game or other school event (latest around midnight).  Her longest trip in the car during the time was around 25 miles; top speed was 75 or so.  Really, really boring driving history, to be honest, for which I'm glad.

Rates went up by around $150/6 months after the experiment.

 

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T’Boo Ted Marshall

T’Boo Ted Marshall 2732

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When my daughter was a senior, I put one of those on her car.  She has always been a responsible driver, but I wanted to see if it did, by chance, lower the rate.  I was upfront with her; told her what this device did, and showed her that I (and the insurance company) could monitor her driving habits.  I told her not to think about it, and just drive like she had been driving all along.  I also made the ex aware of this, given that A) I paid for the car and B) I alone was paying the insurance and registration on the car, along with the maintenance.  To my surprise, the ex was receptive of the idea as well; I figured she would have screamed something about "spying on our child" to me.
In the 90 day period, she had zero hard braking attempts.  She may have had 4 or 5 rapid acceleration events.  It was pretty boring; I'd say roughly 3/4 of her driving was 1 mile to school, and then home each day.  There was some "late" night driving, when coming home from a game or other school event (latest around midnight).  Her longest trip in the car during the time was around 25 miles; top speed was 75 or so.  Really, really boring driving history, to be honest, for which I'm glad.
Rates went up by around $150/6 months after the experiment.
 

Has to be other factors that increased the rate. They all tout no increased rates no matter what and I discussed at length with Underwriters back in my insurance days.

Anyway, I currently sit at a 22% discount. Wife is at 9% and fading fast.

Something does seem odd though. Some of the events of hard braking she is in the school drop off/pick up line and barely moving.
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LebongJames

LebongJames 1812

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31 minutes ago, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:


Has to be other factors that increased the rate. They all tout no increased rates no matter what and I discussed at length with Underwriters back in my insurance days.

Anyway, I currently sit at a 22% discount. Wife is at 9% and fading fast.

Something does seem odd though. Some of the events of hard braking she is in the school drop off/pick up line and barely moving.

On the phone in the line not paying attention and letting the car roll and then noticing that she will hit the car in front of her, she slams on the brakes.

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Francisco 2.0

Francisco 2.0 32395

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1 hour ago, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:


Has to be other factors that increased the rate. They all tout no increased rates no matter what and I discussed at length with Underwriters back in my insurance days.
 

I have to assume the random late night drives is what bumped it up, along with the 75 she was doing in a 65.  Also, the agent/company was told when she was added on the policy that all she would be doing was driving to/from school.  I figure they marked the policy some way, and the after hour drives were not during school time.

Either way, the rates have not increased in 2 years, she will be 20 in a month, and I figure that's a minor win as well.

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elfenix

elfenix 34307

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Posted (edited)
3 hours ago, Pig Bellmont said:

That’s exactly why I never want one of those things. It’s more ammo for the insurance company to screw you

they've got app based monitors now - i downloaded one for a different company, used it, and it spit out just about the same rate i was already paying. 

gasbuddy can do the same thing, though, obviously, isn't tied into insurance. 

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ShaggyBevo RIP

ShaggyBevo RIP 3868

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14 hours ago, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:

We decided to give one of those telematics devices a try to lower our car insurance rates. We’ve had no tickets or accidents so I just wanted to see if we could get it lower.
During a 90 day period they measure the times of day you drive(12-4 am is bad), rapid acceleration(not speed) and hard braking.
My wife says I drive crazy but to me I keep up with the flow of traffic in Dallas.

After one week she has 8 hard braking events. I have zero.

You aren't on your phone multitasking like she is so that is an apples to oranges comparison. /woman

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Modessit

Modessit 5603

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When we switched insurance companies, we got ONE for her car. Rates went down $12 after the test period and were sent it back. Didn't get one for my car since I drive about 1000 miles per week doing Amazon and Uber delivery.

Recently Uber announced a Safe Driver contest with a max prize of $6000 and a bunch of smaller $500 per day prizes. It was partnered with Progressive and done thru an app. 90% of us aren't doing it - especially if we have Progressive - because as soon as they find out your doing Uber they cancel your insurance.

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Js1

Js1 85402

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On 2/2/2020 at 7:49 PM, ernest_t_bass said:

Wife was heating up a sauce cup in microwave, and didn't pull foil all the way off the top.  Starts sparking, and I tell her to open the door.  Keeps sparking, "OPEN THE DOOR!"  She runs the opposite direction.

spacer.png

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TrashMaster G

TrashMaster G 17561

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On 2/2/2020 at 8:49 PM, ernest_t_bass said:

Wife was heating up a sauce cup in microwave, and didn't pull foil all the way off the top.  Starts sparking, and I tell her to open the door.  Keeps sparking, "OPEN THE DOOR!"  She runs the opposite direction.

You just got a very low-cost look at what you can expect from her in a real emergency.  That's good information to have.  You should evaluate and plan accordingly.

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mulletpelini

mulletpelini 5211

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2 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

You just got a very low-cost look at what you can expect from her in a real emergency.  That's good information to have.  You should evaluate and plan accordingly.

Yeah reminds me of the time mullet jr. jr. was choking to death when he was a week old.  Mom just stood there and cried, didn't lift a gotdamn finger or try to do a fucking thing.  Good thing dad was there.  Still pisses me off.

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Spoosner

Spoosner 86

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21 minutes ago, RamjetFDO said:

Every. Motherfucking. Time.

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My wife has a habit of saying "Long story short,..." more than once in the process of telling a story that has not been shortened at all (or if it has I praise jeebus I wasn't there for the full version).  I want to tell her to stop because it just makes the story longer, but I also like sex.

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huge

huge 3793

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36 minutes ago, BHMCruiser said:

My wife got a "Goddammit that's not what I asked you and I don't care about that" from me last night and for some reason did not warmly receive what was intended as warmhearted constructive criticism

savage

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ABSR

ABSR 5315

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18 hours ago, Modessit said:
18 hours ago, RamjetFDO said:
Every. Motherfucking. Time.
storytelling.jpg

Replace "Apologize" with "Repeat parts of story with different details and then argue that she never said the first details and you're just an asshole and she WAS going to ask if you wanted to have sex later but now you can forget it".

Modessit get's women...well not "gets with", but gets.

Also, I would say no woman ever feels she has been talking too long, and as far as getting to the point, it is more of concluding the ramble so you can validate her feelings instead of really stating the conclusion/facts/purpose/ending.

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Modessit

Modessit 5603

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Modessit get's women...well not "gets with", but gets.
Also, I would say no woman ever feels she has been talking too long, and as far as getting to the point, it is more of concluding the ramble so you can validate her feelings instead of really stating the conclusion/facts/purpose/ending.
It's not about the nail.
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Pig Bellmont

Pig Bellmont 8719

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21 hours ago, RamjetFDO said:

My wife used to do that, but I would always say "too late"... so she finally stopped.

I’ve started to lean into the journey through irrelevant details for my own amusement. For example when a tangent starts “remember, she was the one who you met 6 months ago at my moms thing”

I offer, “what was she wearing that night? Was it that flower blouse or was that your other friend? Who is she dating now?”

The longer  and more off track we go the more fun

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Liteitup

Liteitup 138

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1 hour ago, Pig Bellmont said:

I’ve started to lean into the journey through irrelevant details for my own amusement. For example when a tangent starts “remember, she was the one who you met 6 months ago at my moms thing”

I offer, “what was she wearing that night? Was it that flower blouse or was that your other friend? Who is she dating now?”

The longer  and more off track we go the more fun

Oh, hell no.

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Modessit

Modessit 5603

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I’ve started to lean into the journey through irrelevant details for my own amusement. For example when a tangent starts “remember, she was the one who you met 6 months ago at my moms thing”
I offer, “what was she wearing that night? Was it that flower blouse or was that your other friend? Who is she dating now?”
The longer  and more off track we go the more fun
"The one with the big tits that kept licking her lips when you weren't looking? Or the one who rubbed her ass against me in the kitchen? "
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TrashMaster G

TrashMaster G 17561

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1 hour ago, Modessit said:
3 hours ago, Pig Bellmont said:
I’ve started to lean into the journey through irrelevant details for my own amusement. For example when a tangent starts “remember, she was the one who you met 6 months ago at my moms thing”
I offer, “what was she wearing that night? Was it that flower blouse or was that your other friend? Who is she dating now?”
The longer  and more off track we go the more fun

Read more  

"The one with the big tits that kept licking her lips when you weren't looking? Or the one who rubbed her ass against me in the kitchen? "

"Didn't you say she banged one of her co-workers once, or am I thinking of someone else?"

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Buzzrock

Buzzrock 14922

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I’ve started to lean into the journey through irrelevant details for my own amusement. For example when a tangent starts “remember, she was the one who you met 6 months ago at my moms thing”
I offer, “what was she wearing that night? Was it that flower blouse or was that your other friend? Who is she dating now?”
The longer  and more off track we go the more fun


You’re on to something. This approach helps avoid the inevitable “you don’t listen to me!” rant. Another good tactic is just occasionally repeat something back to her. “Really, Susan actually said that to you?” and then you can tune out for a few more minutes. Try it. They really think you’re listening.
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mulletpelini

mulletpelini 5211

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PB has it figured out.  It's also along the same lines of going shopping with her.  Doesn't really bother me much as I don't mind looking at all the other pussy shopping too.  When I've had enough though, I'll start to comment how good clothes are looking on other women as well as her.  She gets the message.

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