Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do

[Armybrat 40842]

39 minutes ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

My mother in law ordered the code red on Sunday, "Get Jake to the ranch." The translation being, "We are all going to the ranch near Gonzalez to hole up until this virus thing blows over. You need to get your ass down here asap." Using the family emergency plan secret phrase for sure added to the drama and urgency. As if someone were going to intercept the encrypted message, crash the survivalist party and abscond with all of our precious resources. Good thing she didn't know that my son had been in the mall food court with the covid patient or I don't think we would have made the cut. 

I suppose you could live out there indefinitely on catfish out of the lake but I'd rather die on a ventilator in the hospital than be on the lamb with Typhoon Mary for more than a couple of days. 

Hope they have a sufficient cache of .22 ammo.

[MNLonghornFUKM 8817]

My mother in law ordered the code red on Sunday, "Get Jake to the ranch." The translation being, "We are all going to the ranch near Gonzalez to hole up until this virus thing blows over. You need to get your ass down here asap." Using the family emergency plan secret phrase for sure added to the drama and urgency. As if someone were going to intercept the encrypted message, crash the survivalist party and abscond with all of our precious resources. Good thing she didn't know that my son had been in the mall food court with the covid patient or I don't think we would have made the cut. 
I suppose you could live out there indefinitely on catfish out of the lake but I'd rather die on a ventilator in the hospital than be on the lamb with Typhoon Mary for more than a couple of days. 

That’s a very peaceful few weeks or months with you and the kid.


I’d look into it

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

39 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

Hope they have a sufficient cache of .22 ammo.

Yeah, he's gonna need to shoot himself by day 3.

[davidg 4037]

47 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Yeah, he's gonna need to shoot himself by day 3.

Who doesn't carry around a special bullet just in case

[RamjetFDO 10575]

11 hours ago, mulletpelini said:

Asian Dawn works better

 

Did you read that in Time magazine?

[Beau Vine 54221]

17 hours ago, Texaus said:

But all that shit would get too hot atop the dryer, explode and possibly burn the house down. She was just being cautious putting it on the washing machine

It's almost like you've heard about my wife....

[Beau Vine 54221]

Quote

What a sucker.

Caelie Wilkes’ dream of being a nurturing plant parent died on the vine when she realized the succulent she’d been tenderly tending for two years was a fake. She recounted her botanical boo-boo Friday in a viral Facebook post.

“I feel like these last two years have been a lie,” Wilkes, 24, wrote.

The stay-at-home mom from California admits she was extremely proud of her “beautiful succulent,” which lived for two years on her kitchen window sill. She was such a dedicated caretaker that “if someone else tried to water my succulent I would get so defensive.”

However, when she tried to transplant it into “the cutest vase,” she made a disturbing discovery: Her “perfect plant” was phony.

“I pull it from the container [and] it’s sitting on Styrofoam with sand glued to the top!” Caelie wrote. “ tried my hardest to keep it looking it’s best, and it’s completely plastic!”

Enlarge ImageCaelie Wilkes spent two years watering her “perfect plant” before realizing it was fake.Facebook

Her faux-plant rant went viral on Facebook, racking up almost 9,000 reactions since Friday as well as a flurry of comments.

“It’s like when you’re in college or high school, and they give you that fake baby to carry around for months to teach you what it’s like to be a mom,” quipped one Facebooker.

“If you loved your plant so much, what’s it matter if it’s fake?” wrote another. “Just cut the styrofoam to fit your new pot and keep the ‘plant’ you love.”

Wilkes’ green-thumb-gone-wrong moment was also shared to an Australian indoor botany page, the Mirror reports, where other plant enthusiasts shared similar tales of deep-rooted deception.

“My friend at work always kills the plants because she doesn’t water them, so I put a fake one in the cafe,” posted one horticultural hornswoggler. “She watered it for a month before I told her it was fake.”

However, some social media watchdogs were less sympathetic.

“How do you have a ‘plant’ for 2 years, take meticulous care of it the entire time, and not notice that it hasn’t grown a millimeter or changed color at all?” pondered one Facebook pundit on Wilkes’ post.

https://nypost.com/2020/03/03/woman-waters-perfect-plant-for-2-years-before-realizing-its-fake/?utm_medium=SocialFlow&utm_campaign=SocialFlow&utm_source=NYPTwitter

https://www.facebook.com/caelie.chapman.5

[NAVY 6740]

1 hour ago, Beau Vine said:

https://nypost.com/2020/03/03/woman-waters-perfect-plant-for-2-years-before-realizing-its-fake/?utm_medium=SocialFlow&utm_campaign=SocialFlow&utm_source=NYPTwitter

https://www.facebook.com/caelie.chapman.5

The levels of attention whoring and stupidity are off the charts 

[Pato del Muerto 52495]

Even if it was real, it’s a succulent. Wife has a dozen around the house, they require almost no effort. 
 

wait...

Edited March 3, 2020 by Pato del Muerto

[TKthunder2 4991]

13 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Even if it was real, it’s a succulent. Wife has a dozen around the house, they require almost no effort. 
 

wait...

Wife had about killed one in our house and told me to throw it away but I just put it in the garage.  3 months later it’s back to good.  Trying to decide what to do with it.

[Pato del Muerto 52495]

1 minute ago, TKthunder2 said:

Wife had about killed one in our house and told me to throw it away but I just put it in the garage.  3 months later it’s back to good.  Trying to decide what to do with it.

Succulents divide easily. So the long game play is to divide and cultivate lots of plants in the garage, sell them online, keep splitting them, make a fortune, and then one day say hey honey you remember that plant you told me to throw away?

[Mitch Cumsteen 18549]

In more coronavirus updates, my wife miraculously found the only place left in San Antonio that still had hand sanitizer. It was a custodial supply place that allegedly is the go to source for the local police and fire departments. They apparently have a chemist who supplies them directly, and the alcohol concentration is upward of 75% vs. the regular 60% that the local ignoranti are using. All you 60% motherfuckers are surely going to die or get the heebie jeebies.

Unsurprisingly, my wife cleaned them out of whatever stock they had plus she special ordered 4 more fucking gallons of the shit. She somehow spent $137 on got damn hand sanitizer. She's also hoarding the shit from her family -- don't tell Typhoon Mary that we are sitting on the motherlode because we ain't sharing. The good news is that whatever we don't use to clean our hands (I estimate around 3.9 gallons), I'm pretty sure I can mix with Topo Chico and lime and get shitfaced.

[HenryJames 66049]

Ranch water, imo.

[Judge Roybeanbag 11819]

My wife wanted to watch something on TV last night.  I glance over and she's holding the remote up, furiously pressing the button with nothing happening.  Then she pulls off the battery cover, rolls them around a bit, puts it back on.  Finally gets the TV on.   I asked her if the batteries were dead.  She says she doesn't think so, she just changed them a month or two ago.  Fast forward a couple minutes, she's lying on the couch and a banner keeps popping up on the TV screen "This feature not available".   Out of the corner of my eye I see her leg is laying on the remote and it's flashing red constantly.  

Her:  Why is it doing that?

Me: What?

Her: that annoying banner thing!

Me: I think you're pressing the closed-caption button or something.

Her: I don't have the remote!

Me: Well your leg is laying on it.

Her:  Oh oops.

Me:  That must be why the batteries keep going dead.

Her: Tone.

 

 

Edited March 3, 2020 by Judge Roybeanbag

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

50 minutes ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

In more coronavirus updates, my wife miraculously found the only place left in San Antonio that still had hand sanitizer. It was a custodial supply place that allegedly is the go to source for the local police and fire departments. They apparently have a chemist who supplies them directly, and the alcohol concentration is upward of 75% vs. the regular 60% that the local ignoranti are using. All you 60% motherfuckers are surely going to die or get the heebie jeebies.

Unsurprisingly, my wife cleaned them out of whatever stock they had plus she special ordered 4 more fucking gallons of the shit. She somehow spent $137 on got damn hand sanitizer. She's also hoarding the shit from her family -- don't tell Typhoon Mary that we are sitting on the motherlode because we ain't sharing. The good news is that whatever we don't use to clean our hands (I estimate around 3.9 gallons), I'm pretty sure I can mix with Topo Chico and lime and get shitfaced.

You've made the first mistake about Doomsday Prepping. Don't tell others that you are Doomsday Prepping. We know where you are and we'll be coming for your hand sanitizer. 

[Armybrat 40842]

5 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

You've made the first mistake about Doomsday Prepping. Don't tell others that you are Doomsday Prepping. We know where you are and we'll be coming for your hand sanitizer and masks.

Fify

[Nivek 16928]

Getting some home improvement done around the house, I had a guy come out measure everything, got a price, and we set a plan. A few scheduling conflicts gave us about 60 days before he could begin. After 3/4 of the work is complete she decides that maybe she would have liked a different plan for some things. Apparently 60 days was not enough time for her to ruminate over baseboard trim for a bathroom.

[Armybrat 40842]

Contractors realllly hate the changes in the middle of a project. And it can be very costly, so do not let her complain about the $$$$.

[mulletpelini 5211]

8 hours ago, Cheeseweasel said:

You've made the first mistake about Doomsday Prepping. Don't tell others that you are Doomsday Prepping. We know where you are and we'll be coming for your hand sanitizer. 

We laugh at Mitch now, but that mfer is long gaming us.  He's gonna cut that 3.9 gallons into millions of tiny bottles and sell it at a premium when shit hits the fan.  Retiring and laughing, that's what he'll be doing.

2 hours ago, Armybrat said:

Contractors realllly hate the changes in the middle of a project. And it can be very costly, so do not let her complain about the $$$$.

cmon brat does he really have a choice whether she complains or not.

[ShaggyBevo RIP 3868]

On 3/4/2020 at 12:51 AM, mulletpelini said:

We laugh at Mitch now, but that mfer is long gaming us.  He's gonna cut that 3.9 gallons into millions of tiny bottles and sell it at a premium when shit hits the fan.  Retiring and laughing, that's what he'll be doing.

He can cross market it as a fire starter for the doomsday preper crowd.

[miguelito 11264]

Whoever stole my wife's Ipad managed to return it to her desk later that day, and placed it below some papers she was working on.

[NAVY 6740]

a sinister plot to make her look unorganized 

[CycleTex87 2970]

I’m assuming the police were working in shifts to recover the iPad?

[Grade of D as in David 13253]

2 hours ago, miguelito said:

Whoever stole my wife's Ipad managed to return it to her desk later that day, and placed it below some papers she was working on.

What's she doing with the new iPad she ordered to replace it?

I'll offer tree fiddy and a best buy coupon.

[HenryJames 66049]

Whenever I walk around the house, I just take mental notes of where my wife has left her purse, keys, laptop, our daughter, etc.

[elfenix 34238]

5 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

For the record, Get Jake to the Ranch should be added to Surly lexicon.

Coming in the fall to a football thread near you.

it's already my new euphemism for taking a shit

[MNLonghornFUKM 8817]

Wife wanted me to bake our dominos pizza last night an extra few minutes to kill off the Coronavirus on it

[deadshank 24652]

Just now, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Wife wanted me to bake our dominos pizza last night an extra few minutes to kill off the Coronavirus on it

no wai

[RockyMountainHighHorn 890]

Ok so the story might not be funny but anyone that has done this I’m sure will find joy. Also, I am looking for advice from people that have done this but my pride gets in the way of starting a whole embarrassing thread. 
 

anyway, while at a kings hockey game last week, my fiancé spun a wheel and magically “won” a free 3 day trip to various US locations. She was so happy and pumped, it was great to see. We walk over to the lady running this event to get the scoop. She goes on to ask us all of these questions-age, relation, combined income, estimated savings, etc. we magically matched all of the criteria because she then burst out and said “wow you really did win!!!......” she went on to explain that all we have to do is to attend a 90 seminar on all of their luxury vacation homes. Attend the seminar-leave with a free vacation. My fiancé was beaming. I have a good 20 signals through all of this that we need to just leave-nods, pokes, saying we are busy every day for the next year, we are busy! She didn’t bite. I don’t know why I knew this but I remembered as a kid seeing my parents come home from one of these at each other necks and looking like they came back from battle. Remember the following days all of our neighbors talk about how much bullshit these companies are filled with, yadda yadda yadda. Now the lady says it will cost 50$ to save our seat at the seminar. As she pulled the card out I literally grabbed it and put it in my pocket and said no we are busy. The lady then turned to me and said what’s the big deal. After fishing in my pocket for the card, my fiancé paid the fee, signed the docs and walked away the happiest person on earth. She just won a free damn trip. I was pissed that all of my signs of “abort! Abort!” Were ignored. “I took your card and said let’s not do this.”
“oh I thought that meant you were going to pay” 

“what about all of the times I said I was busy or shook my head?”

”babe we won a free trip, be excited! It’s only 90 minutes.” Thank god there was a hockey game to enjoy. 
 

called my mom the next day to make sure I wasn’t being crazy and that this was going to be a train wreck....being a room full of the most over the top used car salesman tactics that would drive me insane. We are millennials, we don’t save for a vacation home. My mom responded, “you are going to overdose on Xanax after 30 minutes. Don’t go.”  
Anyone gone to one of these?

[MNLonghornFUKM 8817]

Went to a timeshare opening in celebration Florida like 20 years ago to get comped Seaworld tickets. I was 12 at the time so it didn’t bother me as long as we went to sea world

[elfenix 34238]

i guess they were really hurting for sales to be hitting up a 12 year old

[NeverMarryAStripper 21906]

Sitting through those things wouldn't be worth it if they gave you a blow job under the table while it was going on.  It's a complete beating.  It's like the word no doesn't exist to them.  It's like being Mormon and having a dozen wives all on their period at the same time.  Before it's over you would be willing to sacrifice your first born on an Aztec altar.  My ex did this once.  I told her if she ever did it again I would murder her in her sleep and bury her in the back yard, and I meant it. 

[El Diablo 4232]

A rather naïve coworker "won" an all expense paid vacation to the Bahamas last year.  That was one excited lady. She'd filled out an "entry form" at a local restaurant and dropped it into a box by the cash register and out of all the names in there she was the one that got drawn!

So she gets the call, "You've WON!". So excite, much joy. Fee? Okay. $35 to reserve her spot in paradise, honey get out the credit card and give the lady those digits. Okay now what? Trip leaves from Miami, when can you be here? Huh? I have to go TO Miami to gets my free vacation? How much is airfare from Texas to Miami for me and my husband? WHAT???? FUCK YOU YOU SCAMMING BASTARDS!@!

[burntorangebongos 10710]

41 minutes ago, RockyMountainHighHorn said:

Ok so the story might not be funny but anyone that has done this I’m sure will find joy. Also, I am looking for advice from people that have done this but my pride gets in the way of starting a whole embarrassing thread. 
 

anyway, while at a kings hockey game last week, my fiancé spun a wheel and magically “won” a free 3 day trip to various US locations. She was so happy and pumped, it was great to see. We walk over to the lady running this event to get the scoop. She goes on to ask us all of these questions-age, relation, combined income, estimated savings, etc. we magically matched all of the criteria because she then burst out and said “wow you really did win!!!......” she went on to explain that all we have to do is to attend a 90 seminar on all of their luxury vacation homes. Attend the seminar-leave with a free vacation. My fiancé was beaming. I have a good 20 signals through all of this that we need to just leave-nods, pokes, saying we are busy every day for the next year, we are busy! She didn’t bite. I don’t know why I knew this but I remembered as a kid seeing my parents come home from one of these at each other necks and looking like they came back from battle. Remember the following days all of our neighbors talk about how much bullshit these companies are filled with, yadda yadda yadda. Now the lady says it will cost 50$ to save our seat at the seminar. As she pulled the card out I literally grabbed it and put it in my pocket and said no we are busy. The lady then turned to me and said what’s the big deal. After fishing in my pocket for the card, my fiancé paid the fee, signed the docs and walked away the happiest person on earth. She just won a free damn trip. I was pissed that all of my signs of “abort! Abort!” Were ignored. “I took your card and said let’s not do this.”
“oh I thought that meant you were going to pay” 

“what about all of the times I said I was busy or shook my head?”

”babe we won a free trip, be excited! It’s only 90 minutes.” Thank god there was a hockey game to enjoy. 
 

called my mom the next day to make sure I wasn’t being crazy and that this was going to be a train wreck....being a room full of the most over the top used car salesman tactics that would drive me insane. We are millennials, we don’t save for a vacation home. My mom responded, “you are going to overdose on Xanax after 30 minutes. Don’t go.”  
Anyone gone to one of these?

Call her credit card company and tell them she made the transaction while drunk and dispute the transaction. Tell your fiance it is a timeshare scam with hard sales tactics and she didnt win anything but a sales seminar. 

Im sure their is a yelp page or something online about this company so show her that if she needs further convincing.

[AUS-97HORN 11758]

1 hour ago, RockyMountainHighHorn said:

Anyone gone to one of these?

for the love of god man, grow some balls and fucking use youtube  https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=timeshare+sales+pitch

 

show her the various videos of folks being miserable telling sales people no, being guilted into signing things.     

 

Its not worth the fucking prize to deal with that shit.  Especially if your future wife has some issues saying no to strangers.

Edited March 6, 2020 by AUS-97HORN

[txhorns 2409]

14 minutes ago, AUS-97HORN said:

Especially if your future wife has some issues saying no to strangers.

We already know this.  How else do you explain her going on a date with him in the first place?

[RockyMountainHighHorn 890]

she got to walk around excited for a few days and now gets to walk around shameful and apologetic after I sent her some articles and videos of these. 
damn straight with the picking me comment. She puts up with me and being an avatar on this site. I got lucky. 
have all of my rep for the asspen recs. Forgot about that one. 

Edited March 6, 2020 by RockyMountainHighHorn

[Trey3216 15346]

Wife got sold some “free show tickets and dinner for two” in Vegas for one hour of our time during lunch.  I said “we’re not going to this bullassshit, it’s a time share scam”.  
 

we went for 8 minutes and they started badgering us, like I knew they would, and we left the tour out of a side door.   Dude was chasing us saying we couldn’t just leave.  I told him to fuck off, because how the fuck are you gonna keep me here.  

[Longhornfan1024 1707]

2 hours ago, RockyMountainHighHorn said:

Ok so the story might not be funny but anyone that has done this I’m sure will find joy. Also, I am looking for advice from people that have done this but my pride gets in the way of starting a whole embarrassing thread. 
 

anyway, while at a kings hockey game last week, my fiancé spun a wheel and magically “won” a free 3 day trip to various US locations. She was so happy and pumped, it was great to see. We walk over to the lady running this event to get the scoop. She goes on to ask us all of these questions-age, relation, combined income, estimated savings, etc. we magically matched all of the criteria because she then burst out and said “wow you really did win!!!......” she went on to explain that all we have to do is to attend a 90 seminar on all of their luxury vacation homes. Attend the seminar-leave with a free vacation. My fiancé was beaming. I have a good 20 signals through all of this that we need to just leave-nods, pokes, saying we are busy every day for the next year, we are busy! She didn’t bite. I don’t know why I knew this but I remembered as a kid seeing my parents come home from one of these at each other necks and looking like they came back from battle. Remember the following days all of our neighbors talk about how much bullshit these companies are filled with, yadda yadda yadda. Now the lady says it will cost 50$ to save our seat at the seminar. As she pulled the card out I literally grabbed it and put it in my pocket and said no we are busy. The lady then turned to me and said what’s the big deal. After fishing in my pocket for the card, my fiancé paid the fee, signed the docs and walked away the happiest person on earth. She just won a free damn trip. I was pissed that all of my signs of “abort! Abort!” Were ignored. “I took your card and said let’s not do this.”
“oh I thought that meant you were going to pay” 

“what about all of the times I said I was busy or shook my head?”

”babe we won a free trip, be excited! It’s only 90 minutes.” Thank god there was a hockey game to enjoy. 
 

called my mom the next day to make sure I wasn’t being crazy and that this was going to be a train wreck....being a room full of the most over the top used car salesman tactics that would drive me insane. We are millennials, we don’t save for a vacation home. My mom responded, “you are going to overdose on Xanax after 30 minutes. Don’t go.”  
Anyone gone to one of these?

I mean, instead of beating around the bush just grow some balls and tell her "no, this is a fucking scam" in front of the lady's face.  

[WhatTheBuck 28779]

6 hours ago, miguelito said:

Whoever stole my wife's Ipad managed to return it to her desk later that day, and placed it below some papers she was working on.

This stinks! This is total B.S.! THIS -- oh, here it is. 

[elfenix 34238]

1 hour ago, RockyMountainHighHorn said:

being an avatar on this site

i like your wife's ass

[CycleTex87 2970]

Did the timeshare thing in Pagosa Springs CO about 20 years ago, when the kids were 6/4/2.  We had friends in Pagosa, wanted to go see them, had a couple nights comped at this place, just had to go through the sales pitch.  Horrible experience.  They said they had stuff for the kids to do, but didn’t really. About 3 hours into the deal, kids were completely melting down, and I think it was best for everybody that we just left without signing anything. /CSB

[Dennis Taylor 18819]

5 hours ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Wife wanted me to bake our dominos pizza last night an extra few minutes to kill off the Coronavirus on it

you smothered it in hand sanitizer first,  right??

[Fudge Nuggets 19190]

My dad loves the freebies from the timeshare scammers. I think he gives them so much shit they are begging him to leave before it’s done. This is also a man whose main hobby is fucking with telemarketers. 

[Nivek 16928]

1 hour ago, CycleTex87 said:

Did the timeshare thing in Pagosa Springs CO about 20 years ago, when the kids were 6/4/2.  We had friends in Pagosa, wanted to go see them, had a couple nights comped at this place, just had to go through the sales pitch.  Horrible experience.  They said they had stuff for the kids to do, but didn’t really. About 3 hours into the deal, kids were completely melting down, and I think it was best for everybody that we just left without signing anything. /CSB

My parents went to one of these when we were kids, due to my Mom.  My Dad had the idea of sugaring up the kids before the event so they ultimately asked us to leave.

[TrashMaster G 17554]

7 hours ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Wife wanted me to bake our dominos pizza last night an extra few minutes to kill off the Coronavirus on it

Peak wifeness there.

[TrashMaster G 17554]

7 hours ago, RockyMountainHighHorn said:

Ok so the story might not be funny but anyone that has done this I’m sure will find joy. Also, I am looking for advice from people that have done this but my pride gets in the way of starting a whole embarrassing thread. 
 

anyway, while at a kings hockey game last week, my fiancé spun a wheel and magically “won” a free 3 day trip to various US locations. She was so happy and pumped, it was great to see. We walk over to the lady running this event to get the scoop. She goes on to ask us all of these questions-age, relation, combined income, estimated savings, etc. we magically matched all of the criteria because she then burst out and said “wow you really did win!!!......” she went on to explain that all we have to do is to attend a 90 seminar on all of their luxury vacation homes. Attend the seminar-leave with a free vacation. My fiancé was beaming. I have a good 20 signals through all of this that we need to just leave-nods, pokes, saying we are busy every day for the next year, we are busy! She didn’t bite. I don’t know why I knew this but I remembered as a kid seeing my parents come home from one of these at each other necks and looking like they came back from battle. Remember the following days all of our neighbors talk about how much bullshit these companies are filled with, yadda yadda yadda. Now the lady says it will cost 50$ to save our seat at the seminar. As she pulled the card out I literally grabbed it and put it in my pocket and said no we are busy. The lady then turned to me and said what’s the big deal. After fishing in my pocket for the card, my fiancé paid the fee, signed the docs and walked away the happiest person on earth. She just won a free damn trip. I was pissed that all of my signs of “abort! Abort!” Were ignored. “I took your card and said let’s not do this.”
“oh I thought that meant you were going to pay” 

“what about all of the times I said I was busy or shook my head?”

”babe we won a free trip, be excited! It’s only 90 minutes.” Thank god there was a hockey game to enjoy. 
 

called my mom the next day to make sure I wasn’t being crazy and that this was going to be a train wreck....being a room full of the most over the top used car salesman tactics that would drive me insane. We are millennials, we don’t save for a vacation home. My mom responded, “you are going to overdose on Xanax after 30 minutes. Don’t go.”  
Anyone gone to one of these?

Ask your fiance how much the "free" trip has cost so far.

[NeverMarryAStripper 21906]

It’s not too late to bail, on the fiancé not the sales pitch

[Grade of D as in David 13253]

9 hours ago, RockyMountainHighHorn said:

Ok so the story might not be funny but anyone that has done this I’m sure will find joy. Also, I am looking for advice from people that have done this but my pride gets in the way of starting a whole embarrassing thread. 
 

anyway, while at a kings hockey game last week, my fiancé spun a wheel and magically “won” a free 3 day trip to various US locations. She was so happy and pumped, it was great to see. We walk over to the lady running this event to get the scoop. She goes on to ask us all of these questions-age, relation, combined income, estimated savings, etc. we magically matched all of the criteria because she then burst out and said “wow you really did win!!!......” she went on to explain that all we have to do is to attend a 90 seminar on all of their luxury vacation homes. Attend the seminar-leave with a free vacation. My fiancé was beaming. I have a good 20 signals through all of this that we need to just leave-nods, pokes, saying we are busy every day for the next year, we are busy! She didn’t bite. I don’t know why I knew this but I remembered as a kid seeing my parents come home from one of these at each other necks and looking like they came back from battle. Remember the following days all of our neighbors talk about how much bullshit these companies are filled with, yadda yadda yadda. Now the lady says it will cost 50$ to save our seat at the seminar. As she pulled the card out I literally grabbed it and put it in my pocket and said no we are busy. The lady then turned to me and said what’s the big deal. After fishing in my pocket for the card, my fiancé paid the fee, signed the docs and walked away the happiest person on earth. She just won a free damn trip. I was pissed that all of my signs of “abort! Abort!” Were ignored. “I took your card and said let’s not do this.”
“oh I thought that meant you were going to pay” 

“what about all of the times I said I was busy or shook my head?”

”babe we won a free trip, be excited! It’s only 90 minutes.” Thank god there was a hockey game to enjoy. 
 

called my mom the next day to make sure I wasn’t being crazy and that this was going to be a train wreck....being a room full of the most over the top used car salesman tactics that would drive me insane. We are millennials, we don’t save for a vacation home. My mom responded, “you are going to overdose on Xanax after 30 minutes. Don’t go.”  
Anyone gone to one of these?

What a coincidence last week she won a trip to pound town with a layover in dick city.

[Grade of D as in David 13253]

9 hours ago, elfenix said:

i guess they were really hurting for sales to be hitting up a 12 year old