Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do

[deadshank 24,653]

4 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Final update on SIL.

We moved her to the living room and took the 3 kids.  We traded 3 yappy kids that don't like to sleep for a grown-ass adult that complains and snores.  Win.

I could write quite a bit about all the things she did to somewhat ruin the vacation, but I'll pick two.

We were at Hollywood Studios.  We needed to get from one side of the park to the other as we had reservations for Tower of Terror.  I was in the lead with the kids.  We kept having to stop and wait for SIL.  At one point, she completely disappeared.  After several calls, my wife finally got hold of her to find out she didn't really want to ride ToT.  We found her on the way back, sitting at a table, with two plates of food.  She decided to fly all the way to Orlando to ... eat.  

She loaned my son a cooling towel while we waited in line for a ride.  He accidentally left the plastic carrying bag for the towel on the ride.  She began to berate him about being irresponsible.  This is when I finally lost it.  You've got to understand my 15 year-old is the perfect kid - 4.0 GPA, never raises his voice, never does anything wrong.  I told him not to worry about it and that, "Losing a replaceable plastic bag is far less irresponsible than, say, NOT FUCKING WORKING!".  I have no idea how much of this she heard; however, from this point on, the group kind of just left her to herself.  At least my wife was on board.

 

I’m disappointed that this story did not end with “then I put my foot in her fat ass.”

 

[mininghorn88 2,320]

It never ceases to amaze me that there are such dumbasses and assholes in the world like your SIL.

My thought process is so foreign to these types that I actually enjoy listening (or reading) about the absurdity of it all.

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

16 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

She decided to fly all the way to Orlando to ... eat.  

[40acredropout 2,908]

On 7/6/2022 at 8:38 PM, markstanco said:

"If you prepare the turkey burgers and the onions I will cook them. But make sure the burgers are really thin"

Okay.

"One of them fell apart because it was too thin and fell through the grates. Why did you do it so thin?"

Okay again.

It's a gas grill. Grab the grate with a wrench or I can and pull it out.

Nope it's dirty now.

Nice of you to have homosexuals over for dinner.

 

Edited July 8, 2022 by 40acredropout

[Js1 85,744]

8 minutes ago, 40acredropout said:

Nice of you to have homosexuals over for dinner.

I resent that.  Turkey burgers suck. 

[Trey3216 15,380]

18 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

Let’s hope not.

I admire your optimism though. 

As lazy as she is and as much as she likes to eat, I imagine he'll have a FINAL update in the next dozen or so years.  

[Longboard Horn 40,843]

[Knoxtnhorn 6,164]

Luckily my wife is on board, and this crap doesn't come between us.

My MIL passed away from cancer a year ago.  She moved down here so that my wife and SIL could care for her.  Before she got too sick, she planted a rose garden in front of my SIL's house.  They named it "June's Garden".  Went over to mow yesterday and found almost all of the roses had died due to lack of water.  SIL has been back in town for over a week.  One can actually touch the bushes from the front porch.  When I told my wife, she went apoplectic.  SIL's excuse was that the water hose had deteriorated and was unusable.  I told my wife she could have just filled up a container w/ water and thrown it off her front porch without even having to touch the yard.   

SIL's disability gimmick apparently ends in August.  She has yet to find a job.

Though I know my posts are far from humorous per this board, I appreciate y'all letting me vent.

[Crapinon 2,311]

While we were getting ready for work this morning, I mentioned to my wife that the Japanese EX Prime minister had been assassinated. She asked me why he didn't have protection like our presidents. While we were discussing this, I mentioned Jimmy Carter, then Reagan. She told me in no uncertain terms that Reagan was president before Carter. I told her that was incorrect. She kept telling me I was wrong so I suggested she look it up. "I don't need to look it up because I know I'm right and you're wrong." So I looked it up, read it to her, did a victory lap and spiked the ball. She was not amused and told me I didn't have to be so smug about it. When I told her my smugness was a direct response to her smugness, she said "I'm ready to go to work where everyone is not a jerk." Should be a fun evening.....

[tbone_ 14,255]

While we were getting ready for work this morning, I mentioned to my wife that the Japanese EX Prime minister had been assassinated. She asked me why he didn't have protection like our presidents. While we were discussing this, I mentioned Jimmy Carter, then Reagan. She told me in no uncertain terms that Reagan was president before Carter. I told her that was incorrect. She kept telling me I was wrong so I suggested she look it up. "I don't need to look it up because I know I'm right and you're wrong." So I looked it up, read it to her, did a victory lap and spiked the ball. She was not amused and told me I didn't have to be so smug about it. When I told her my smugness was a direct response to her smugness, she said "I'm ready to go to work where everyone is not a jerk." Should be a fun evening.....

Well yea, because the Iranians wouldn’t release the hostages until after Regans inauguration because of some beef they had with Carter.

[deadshank 24,653]

54 minutes ago, Crapinon said:

she said "I'm ready to go to work where everyone is not a jerk." Should be a fun evening.....

She went to work on me and it was a fun evening 

[Incredulity 11,686]

1 hour ago, Crapinon said:

While we were getting ready for work this morning, I mentioned to my wife that the Japanese EX Prime minister had been assassinated. She asked me why he didn't have protection like our presidents. While we were discussing this, I mentioned Jimmy Carter, then Reagan. She told me in no uncertain terms that Reagan was president before Carter. I told her that was incorrect. She kept telling me I was wrong so I suggested she look it up. "I don't need to look it up because I know I'm right and you're wrong." So I looked it up, read it to her, did a victory lap and spiked the ball. She was not amused and told me I didn't have to be so smug about it. When I told her my smugness was a direct response to her smugness, she said "I'm ready to go to work where everyone is not a jerk." Should be a fun evening.....

Tonight’s the night to try for butt stuff

[WhatTheBuck 28,825]

2 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Luckily my wife is on board, and this crap doesn't come between us.

My MIL passed away from cancer a year ago.  She moved down here so that my wife and SIL could care for her.  Before she got too sick, she planted a rose garden in front of my SIL's house.  They named it "June's Garden".  Went over to mow yesterday and found almost all of the roses had died due to lack of water.  SIL has been back in town for over a week.  One can actually touch the bushes from the front porch.  When I told my wife, she went apoplectic.  SIL's excuse was that the water hose had deteriorated and was unusable.  I told my wife she could have just filled up a container w/ water and thrown it off her front porch without even having to touch the yard.   

SIL's disability gimmick apparently ends in August.  She has yet to find a job.

Though I know my posts are far from humorous per this board, I appreciate y'all letting me vent.

Roses are really hearty plants. Chances are they’re not dead. Do some googling, trim everything back, keep them watered, and they’ll probably recover.

I once lived in an apartment with a rose bush in between a couple shrubs. Some landscapers dug it up and replaced it with another shrub. (Wtf?) Then the rose bush sprouted up again in front of that shrub. They’re hard to kill.

”As long as the roots are not severed, all is well. And all will be well in the garden.”

[Grade of D as in David 13,253]

2 hours ago, Crapinon said:

While we were getting ready for work this morning, I mentioned to my wife that the Japanese EX Prime minister had been assassinated. She asked me why he didn't have protection like our presidents. While we were discussing this, I mentioned Jimmy Carter, then Reagan. She told me in no uncertain terms that Reagan was president before Carter. I told her that was incorrect. She kept telling me I was wrong so I suggested she look it up. "I don't need to look it up because I know I'm right and you're wrong." So I looked it up, read it to her, did a victory lap and spiked the ball. She was not amused and told me I didn't have to be so smug about it. When I told her my smugness was a direct response to her smugness, she said "I'm ready to go to work where everyone is not a jerk." Should be a fun evening.....

 

Lol your weekend is fucked. Should have pulled this on a Tuesday.

[nnm 36,841]

39 minutes ago, Grade of D as in David said:

Lol your weekend is fucked. Should have pulled this on a Tuesday.

Kinda hard to schedule the assassination of a foreign leader.
Unless you’re an assassin.  

[WhatTheBuck 28,825]

Damnit. I meant “hardy.”

[WhatTheBuck 28,825]

17 minutes ago, nnm said:

Kinda hard to schedule the assassination of a foreign leader.
Unless you’re an assassin.  

I wonder how many hash oil cartridges the assassin had.

[Crapinon 2,311]

4 hours ago, deadshank said:

She went to work on me and it was a fun evening 

So you like to hear someone bitch about work and watch cat videos on FB?

[Longboard Horn 40,843]

15 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

SIL's disability gimmick apparently ends in August.  She has yet to find a job.

You to the SIL next month 

[HenryJames 66,275]

17 hours ago, Crapinon said:

"I'm ready to go to work where everyone is not a jerk."

Obviously not a Surly mod.

[Grade of D as in David 13,253]

1 hour ago, HenryJames said:

Obviously not a Surly mod.

[SHOOTER12 8,852]

23 hours ago, Crapinon said:

While we were getting ready for work this morning, I mentioned to my wife that the Japanese EX Prime minister had been assassinated. She asked me why he didn't have protection like our presidents. While we were discussing this, I mentioned Jimmy Carter, then Reagan. She told me in no uncertain terms that Reagan was president before Carter. I told her that was incorrect. She kept telling me I was wrong so I suggested she look it up. "I don't need to look it up because I know I'm right and you're wrong." So I looked it up, read it to her, did a victory lap and spiked the ball. She was not amused and told me I didn't have to be so smug about it. When I told her my smugness was a direct response to her smugness, she said "I'm ready to go to work where everyone is not a jerk." Should be a fun evening.....

You're married to my wife?  Great!  Keep the bitch.

Edited July 9, 2022 by SHOOTER12

[956 Worldwide 34,908]

We were standing on our landing locking the door and our upstairs neighbor walked down the stairs, said hello, and continued on.

Wife: “Does she live above us or below us?”

[gyroprotagonist 2,595]

33 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

We were standing on our landing locking the door and our upstairs neighbor walked down the stairs, said hello, and continued on.

Wife: “Does she live above us or below us?”

[ABSR 5,327]

50 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

We were standing on our landing locking the door and our upstairs neighbor walked down the stairs, said hello, and continued on.

Wife: “Does she live above us or below us?”

Your wife sounds SUPER hot!

[BHMCruiser 1,818]

On 7/8/2022 at 4:05 PM, Knoxtnhorn said:

Luckily my wife is on board, and this crap doesn't come between us.

My MIL passed away from cancer a year ago.  She moved down here so that my wife and SIL could care for her.  Before she got too sick, she planted a rose garden in front of my SIL's house.  They named it "June's Garden".  Went over to mow yesterday and found almost all of the roses had died due to lack of water.  SIL has been back in town for over a week.  One can actually touch the bushes from the front porch.  When I told my wife, she went apoplectic.  SIL's excuse was that the water hose had deteriorated and was unusable.  I told my wife she could have just filled up a container w/ water and thrown it off her front porch without even having to touch the yard.   

SIL's disability gimmick apparently ends in August.  She has yet to find a job.

Though I know my posts are far from humorous per this board, I appreciate y'all letting me vent.

Again, I find them HILARIOUS

[Kennythetiger 9,496]

On 6/28/2022 at 4:27 PM, Reagan1k said:

Interview is scheduled for 3 weeks from now when I make a Batan style march across the country for the visit.  In the meantime, a neighbor is doing the bare basics as a gesture of goodwill.  I can’t wait until she wants to backcharge his ass for something he did “wrong”.

Any updates???  

[Knoxtnhorn 6,164]

Quick update as I don't have shitall else to do right now.  /Teacher on summer break

1. My SIL dropped her two dogs off at my parent's house before she flew (Disney).   She flew back on July 1st; we returned on July 7th.  Come to find out, she never picked the dogs up.  She had tested positive for Covid, so that may or may not have been a valid excuse.  She had very minor symptoms; however, I am under the impression that dogs can contract Covid, so that may have been her reasoning.  Regardless, she didn't notify either of my parents.  After a week, my mom just took them over to her.

Still no job.  She's down to about 3 weeks before her disability runs out.  I have already made it perfectly clear that there is no way in hell she's going to end up in my house.  Wife agrees.

2.  This'll be fun.  Long story short, my wife's cousin may have stolen or manipulated their grandfather's will.  He passed in 2021.  The cousin and his wife just bought a brand new house and $60k+ truck. I jokingly told my wife that that's where the will money went.  She said that probate (or whatever it is) generally takes at least a year to get settled.  Come to find out the cousin is now claiming that she wasn't in the will.  Without turning this into a 2-page post, just rest assure that there is absolutely no way that he would have left her out of his will on purpose.  My wife is looking into attorneys, so I've got that drama to look forward to.

Fun side story.  My wife's grandparents got divorced 60 years into their marriage (in 2017) because the grandmother's sisters kidnapped her.  From what I understand, grandmother got put into the hospital.  Her sisters were bringing food to her.  The doctor asked that they stop because she was put on a specific diet.  The sisters assumed that the grandfather's side of the family was trying to alienate them, so they convinced grandmother to cut off contact with grandfather and, eventually, divorce him.  It was actually quite sad.  Both grandparents were old and in poor health.  Neither one really understood what was going on.  They were just listening to those that they trusted.

I have no idea how my wife is so normal.

[Pato del Muerto 52,853]

21 minutes ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

I have no idea how my wife is so normal.

Think a little more on this. 

[tigol 2,421]

39 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Think a little more on this. 

Exactly.  She's not normal.  Your radar is jammed.

[Knoxtnhorn 6,164]

2 hours ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Think a little more on this. 

Cute.

[ztejas 43,741]

2 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Quick update as I don't have shitall else to do right now.  /Teacher on summer break

1. My SIL dropped her two dogs off at my parent's house before she flew (Disney).   She flew back on July 1st; we returned on July 7th.  Come to find out, she never picked the dogs up.  She had tested positive for Covid, so that may or may not have been a valid excuse.  She had very minor symptoms; however, I am under the impression that dogs can contract Covid, so that may have been her reasoning.  Regardless, she didn't notify either of my parents.  After a week, my mom just took them over to her.

Still no job.  She's down to about 3 weeks before her disability runs out.  I have already made it perfectly clear that there is no way in hell she's going to end up in my house.  Wife agrees.

2.  This'll be fun.  Long story short, my wife's cousin may have stolen or manipulated their grandfather's will.  He passed in 2021.  The cousin and his wife just bought a brand new house and $60k+ truck. I jokingly told my wife that that's where the will money went.  She said that probate (or whatever it is) generally takes at least a year to get settled.  Come to find out the cousin is now claiming that she wasn't in the will.  Without turning this into a 2-page post, just rest assure that there is absolutely no way that he would have left her out of his will on purpose.  My wife is looking into attorneys, so I've got that drama to look forward to.

Fun side story.  My wife's grandparents got divorced 60 years into their marriage (in 2017) because the grandmother's sisters kidnapped her.  From what I understand, grandmother got put into the hospital.  Her sisters were bringing food to her.  The doctor asked that they stop because she was put on a specific diet.  The sisters assumed that the grandfather's side of the family was trying to alienate them, so they convinced grandmother to cut off contact with grandfather and, eventually, divorce him.  It was actually quite sad.  Both grandparents were old and in poor health.  Neither one really understood what was going on.  They were just listening to those that they trusted.

I have no idea how my wife is so normal.

You must really love your wife to put up with that level of family insanity. 

[SHOOTER12 8,852]

11 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Quick update as I don't have shitall else to do right now.  /Teacher on summer break

1. My SIL dropped her two dogs off at my parent's house before she flew (Disney).   She flew back on July 1st; we returned on July 7th.  Come to find out, she never picked the dogs up.  She had tested positive for Covid, so that may or may not have been a valid excuse.  She had very minor symptoms; however, I am under the impression that dogs can contract Covid, so that may have been her reasoning.  Regardless, she didn't notify either of my parents.  After a week, my mom just took them over to her.

Still no job.  She's down to about 3 weeks before her disability runs out.  I have already made it perfectly clear that there is no way in hell she's going to end up in my house.  Wife agrees.

2.  This'll be fun.  Long story short, my wife's cousin may have stolen or manipulated their grandfather's will.  He passed in 2021.  The cousin and his wife just bought a brand new house and $60k+ truck. I jokingly told my wife that that's where the will money went.  She said that probate (or whatever it is) generally takes at least a year to get settled.  Come to find out the cousin is now claiming that she wasn't in the will.  Without turning this into a 2-page post, just rest assure that there is absolutely no way that he would have left her out of his will on purpose.  My wife is looking into attorneys, so I've got that drama to look forward to.

Fun side story.  My wife's grandparents got divorced 60 years into their marriage (in 2017) because the grandmother's sisters kidnapped her.  From what I understand, grandmother got put into the hospital.  Her sisters were bringing food to her.  The doctor asked that they stop because she was put on a specific diet.  The sisters assumed that the grandfather's side of the family was trying to alienate them, so they convinced grandmother to cut off contact with grandfather and, eventually, divorce him.  It was actually quite sad.  Both grandparents were old and in poor health.  Neither one really understood what was going on.  They were just listening to those that they trusted.

I have no idea how my wife is so normal.

 

10 hours ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Think a little more on this. 

 

10 hours ago, tigol said:

Exactly.  She's not normal.  Your radar is jammed.

Dem genes be percolating....watch out. 

[cactusflinthead 27,615]

21 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

Any updates???  

Yeah, I am expecting to hear he's way too expensive. Bonus points if the kindly neighbor has given up helping too.

Possible scenarios include stopping random vato with mower to inquire about his rates and his subsequent abandoning her insane demands.

[AUS-97HORN 11,874]

24 minutes ago, cactusflinthead said:

Yeah, I am expecting to hear he's way too expensive. Bonus points if the kindly neighbor has given up helping too.

Possible scenarios include stopping random vato with mower to inquire about his rates and his subsequent abandoning her insane demands.

or, follow me here.... you read her the fucking riot act to shut the fuck up, and pay for the damn yard guy whatever the fuck he asks for.  There is a damn good chance the yard people had to raise their rates in the last year by a lot

 

It sucks but my yard guy had to start charging all his clients an extra $20/mo to help pay for the increased overhead of gas/ repair/expenses, etc.

 

[cactusflinthead 27,615]

20 minutes ago, AUS-97HORN said:

or, follow me here.... you read her the fucking riot act to shut the fuck up, and pay for the damn yard guy whatever the fuck he asks for.  There is a damn good chance the yard people had to raise their rates in the last year by a lot

 

It sucks but my yard guy had to start charging all his clients an extra $20/mo to help pay for the increased overhead of gas/ repair/expenses, etc.

 

This month is the first one in the last year that fert went down. Round-up went up every month last spring/ summer. It's either eat the cost in a locked in contract or renegotiate. 

She is gonna find out pretty quickly that the cheap guys aren't as cheap as they used to be. She might figure out being nicer has its perks, but I doubt it. Be a bitch and you get no extras. Bare fucking minimum and you're gonna see a price increase for the bitch/asshole factor.

[nnm 36,841]

She’s obviously heard of something called a hammer drill. 

 

[Pato del Muerto 52,853]

That actually went better then what was playing in my head from reading your post.  

[66BUFF 2,574]

38 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

That actually went better then what was playing in my head from reading your post.  

I got to quit watching so much porn

[Jameslaw121 4,455]

1 hour ago, 66BUFF said:

I got to quit watching so much porn

yeah - that was me too...

[Jameslaw121 4,455]

20 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Quick update as I don't have shitall else to do right now.  /Teacher on summer break

1. My SIL dropped her two dogs off at my parent's house before she flew (Disney).   She flew back on July 1st; we returned on July 7th.  Come to find out, she never picked the dogs up.  She had tested positive for Covid, so that may or may not have been a valid excuse.  She had very minor symptoms; however, I am under the impression that dogs can contract Covid, so that may have been her reasoning.  Regardless, she didn't notify either of my parents.  After a week, my mom just took them over to her.

Still no job.  She's down to about 3 weeks before her disability runs out.  I have already made it perfectly clear that there is no way in hell she's going to end up in my house.  Wife agrees.

2.  This'll be fun.  Long story short, my wife's cousin may have stolen or manipulated their grandfather's will.  He passed in 2021.  The cousin and his wife just bought a brand new house and $60k+ truck. I jokingly told my wife that that's where the will money went.  She said that probate (or whatever it is) generally takes at least a year to get settled.  Come to find out the cousin is now claiming that she wasn't in the will.  Without turning this into a 2-page post, just rest assure that there is absolutely no way that he would have left her out of his will on purpose.  My wife is looking into attorneys, so I've got that drama to look forward to.

Fun side story.  My wife's grandparents got divorced 60 years into their marriage (in 2017) because the grandmother's sisters kidnapped her.  From what I understand, grandmother got put into the hospital.  Her sisters were bringing food to her.  The doctor asked that they stop because she was put on a specific diet.  The sisters assumed that the grandfather's side of the family was trying to alienate them, so they convinced grandmother to cut off contact with grandfather and, eventually, divorce him.  It was actually quite sad.  Both grandparents were old and in poor health.  Neither one really understood what was going on.  They were just listening to those that they trusted.

I have no idea how my wife is so normal.

God i can't wait until Thanksgiving...

Wife : What do we need to bring to Knox's for Thanksgiving?

Me : Just a big fucking tub of popcorn.

[Knoxtnhorn 6,164]

1 hour ago, Jameslaw121 said:

God i can't wait until Thanksgiving...

Wife : What do we need to bring to Knox's for Thanksgiving?

Me : Just a big fucking tub of popcorn.

Except that we may be in Hot Springs this year on TGiving.  SIL is all yours.

[Tylerocks 2,557]

I know this is small potato's to some of the shit some of y'all are dealing with, but....

 

Her: complains about the kitchen being dirty/messy.

Also Her: leaves a trail of dishes on the counters, in the sink, leaves empty packaging and stuff for the recycling bin on the counter.

Keep in mind that the dishwasher and compactor are no more than a step or 2 away and the recycling bin is 10 feet away in the garage.

Edited July 13, 2022 by Tylerocks

[Sandman 3,420]

Went grocery shopping with the wife, she had asked me to remind her to get stuff to make pigs in a blanket. As we entered the aisle, I said don't forget to get the croissant stuff. I meant to say "crescent rolls", I'm no foodie snob or a frenchman and don't know why I said croissant but I did. She laughed and said "You mean crescent rolls? LOL". I said well, croissant is french for crescent so it's the same thing. She said "That's not true. Croissants are round." 

[Knoxtnhorn 6,164]

3 hours ago, Tylerocks said:

I know this is small potato's to some of the shit some of y'all are dealing with, but....

 

Her: complains about the kitchen being dirty/messy.

Also Her: leaves a trail of dishes on the counters, in the sink, leaves empty packaging and stuff for the recycling bin on the counter.

Keep in mind that the dishwasher and compactor are no more than a step or 2 away and the recycling bin is 10 feet away in the garage.

Lol.  Somewhere on this thread I pointed out that my wife (and kids) will leave recycled items at the base of our back door.  If you open the back door to the porch, the large, Rubbermaid recycling container is right there.  I measured.  24 inches from the "settling" spot to the container on the other side of the door.

This morning - 2 aluminum cans, 3 cardboard boxes, 3 plastic bottles - 2 feet from the container.

[Lhorn 5,024]

My 9 yo had a friend over while we are packing stuff for a move. Wife decided to make dinner of tater tots, Dino nuggets for the kids and chicken apple sausage.  Keep it simple, fine with me. 
Spills Dino nuggets on the floor walking from the garage fridge to the kitchen.  Decides to put everything on the grill since it’s hot and don’t want to turn on the oven. Also fine.  Puts food on the grill, walks away for 15 minutes and burns most of the food.  Cut off MOST of the burnt part and serve to your family….. her typical home cooked meal.  Then get angry at me when I mention that she burns a lot meals.  

She’s not a bad cook, she’s a lazy, careless cook. 
 

 

[Sam Lin 3,564]

Coworker had a story about his parents, apparently mom always burned the eggs, blamed the pan. Dad bought her a new pan one Christmas. First day after, she used it, he took a bite, and said "well, it's not the pan."

[shakahorn 1,650]

6 hours ago, Sandman said:

Went grocery shopping with the wife, she had asked me to remind her to get stuff to make pigs in a blanket. As we entered the aisle, I said don't forget to get the croissant stuff. I meant to say "crescent rolls", I'm no foodie snob or a frenchman and don't know why I said croissant but I did. She laughed and said "You mean crescent rolls? LOL". I said well, croissant is french for crescent so it's the same thing. She said "That's not true. Croissants are round." 

Guess she ain't never been to Jack in the Box for breakfast.

 

csb some other dudes wife, this Greek lady who we did business with, took me and my business partner out for lunch.  Trying to show off her Greek heritage, she would explain all the dishes that came out which was pretty standard Greek fare served in America.  Spanikopita, moussaka, souvlaki, whatever.  When she said 'and this is pita bread' like she was talking to a little kid, I finally lost it and said 'yeah lady, we have Jack in the Box where I come from.'  Lunch ended pretty awkwardly after that.

[Dennis Taylor 19,024]

16 hours ago, 66BUFF said:

I got to quit watching so much porn

That was just the first few seconds...after that she had to call someone to come fix the cable

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

6 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Coworker had a story about his parents, apparently mom always burned the eggs, blamed the pan. Dad bought her a new pan one Christmas. First day after, she used it, he took a bite, and said "well, it's not the pan."

And that's why you don't have a baby brother.