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Posted
8 minutes ago, Tylerocks said:

Do you guys get texts interrupting your bathroom sessions?

 

"Where are you??"

"Are you almost done?"

 

 

wtf is that about?

It’s unreal. You haven’t talked to me all day, and now you have an urgent question about whatever the fuck?

Posted
10 hours ago, Tylerocks said:

Do you guys get texts interrupting your bathroom sessions?

 

"Where are you??"

"Are you almost done?"

 

 

wtf is that about?

THIS. It's a sixth sense that wives have.  OMG he's been in the bathroom for 10 minutes!  Screaming, jealousy, claims of abandoning the family, being a deadbeat dad, betrayal.  WTF I'm taking a shit, woman.  I'll be out in a few minutes.

Posted

On the other hand, their bathroom visits - regardless of whether they consist of nothing more than grabbing a nail clipper to go trim the sprouts with - culminate with the fart fan switched to "Full On" instead of only 60 minutes, even if it's 0200.

 

Posted
12 minutes ago, thunderlounge said:

TIL: he was not speaking of a perimeter alarm. 

I even googled it before posting the Chris Rock gif.  Maybe I should've figured it out from the thread context, but I didn't.  

Posted
Oh shit. Wife(43) sounded the Peri alarm this morning while we made the kids breakfast.
Learning from those unwise souls above I just stared blankly ahead and took a large gulp of coffee.

We’re here for you, dude. Be proud that she is aware. You are ahead of the game.
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Posted

I know it's stolen valor since it's not a wife but the wildest and longest (5+ years) friend with benefits of my life just started perimenopause at 42.  She is now my friend.  

It's stunning what happened to her drive and general demeanor.  Good luck.

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Posted
5 hours ago, Not a cat said:

I know it's stolen valor since it's not a wife but the wildest and longest (5+ years) friend with benefits of my life just started perimenopause at 42.  She is now my friend.  

It's stunning what happened to her drive and general demeanor.  Good luck.

It's not all women. Some of the horniest women I've encountered were in the midst of perimenopause. 

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Posted
On 4/21/2025 at 10:40 AM, Tex Long said:

On the other hand, their bathroom visits - regardless of whether they consist of nothing more than grabbing a nail clipper to go trim the sprouts with - culminate with the fart fan switched to "Full On" instead of only 60 minutes, even if it's 0200.

 

My husband won't fix my fart fan.  I can't decide if he's lazy or gross.  Probly a little of both.

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Posted
22 minutes ago, tigol said:

My husband won't fix my fart fan.  I can't decide if he's lazy or gross.  Probly a little of both.

Next birhday - or whatever occasion - buy him a new one. But make certain the switch has a remote.

Posted
2 hours ago, tigol said:

My husband won't fix my fart fan.  I can't decide if he's lazy or gross.  Probly a little of both.

Is this you?

 

Posted

I was going out for a farewell party for a friend. 15 minutes before I'm supposed to leave the house.

 

Her: Can you grill the galbi before you go?

Me: Okay, where is it?

Her: It's still frozen...

Posted
6 hours ago, Dennis Taylor said:

She turned on the light to walk through the laundry room to go into the garage and get in her car and leave.  It's broad fucking daylight and that room might be 10' wide

I'm not saying you wouldn't be convicted if you shot her - just saying that I would understand. 

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