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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do


Spur08

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13 minutes ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Lldog is OG.. but damn, not sure if ive ever heard anyone trash fritos.

No it's not a divorce worthy, but fritos are a sensitive issue. My mom bought scoops instead of regular like 15 years ago and it still gets my old man angry. Next time she does that I wouldn't be surprised if they split

On the most recent ski trip I had to stop at three different markets/grocery stores in search of regular Fritos for chili pie. One place had chili cheese Fritos, one no fucking Fritos at all (NFFAA), and the last only scoops. I fucking bought the scoops and punched the bag on the counter before I made the frito pies. Wife had no appreciation for the frito nuance. 

Edited by Anastasis
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8 hours ago, Upgrayedd said:

Got back last night from a week-long trip to Colorado skiing.  We drove.

I pack the car.  I also unpack the car.  Luggage, skis, boots, gear, etc.  Skis and poles go in the roof box.  This time so did the boots.  She assists with the unload.

Her:  Why did you put the boots in the roof box?  They were in my boot bag.

Me:  I pulled them out so I could flatten the boot bags.  Easier to see out the back with the rear-view mirror.

H:  They were in the bag though.

M:  Yes.  Yes they were:

H:   I didn't want them up there.

M:  What difference does it make?  It's storage space for shit we don't need in the car.  They were up there on the ride up too.  

H:  I wanted them in the bag.  Especially on the ride up because I don't like putting on cold boots.  You could have put the bag to the side.

M:  The boots had all night to get to room temperature, so that's not a good reason.  Tell you what, next time you can load the gear.

So she doesn't like my tone.  And because she's irritated, instead of setting my skis down on the concrete driveway like they should, she decides to de-tune the edges by setting the tips down and sliding them across the driveway until she puts the tails down.  I know her and she didn't do it on purpose out of spite - more likely she's frosted about the boot thing and not paying attention.

M:  The fuck you do that for?

H:  ????

M:  I could hear the edges grinding on the driveway (someone may accurately point out that edges on the tips should be de-tuned anyway, but it shouldn't be with the driveway method, so that's not the point).

H:  They're fine.

M:  You'd have a conniption if I did that to your gear.  Help me get the roof box off please.

The roof box is light, but bulky.  Helps to have two people.  I slide the front of the box off the rack towards her to grab.  I have the back and am ready to lift.

M:  Ready?

H: . . . . . . . . .

M:  Ok?

H: . . . . . .

M:  It's customary to have a verbal acknowledgment if you are asked if you are ready or not.  Ready?  Yes or no?

H.  Maybe.

There’s a lot of tales on here that make me cringe, but wow. If that’s an accurate play by play you’ve got my sympathy 

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13 hours ago, Upgrayedd said:

So she doesn't like my tone.  And because she's irritated, instead of setting my skis down on the concrete driveway like they should, she decides to de-tune the edges by setting the tips down and sliding them across the driveway until she puts the tails down.  I know her and she didn't do it on purpose out of spite - more likely she's frosted about the boot thing and not paying attention.

M:  The fuck you do that for?

H:  ????

M:  I could hear the edges grinding on the driveway (someone may accurately point out that edges on the tips should be de-tuned anyway, but it shouldn't be with the driveway method, so that's not the point).

H:  They're fine.

M:  You'd have a conniption if I did that to your gear.  Help me get the roof box off please.

White people problems.

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My wife and I recently bought a really old house that we're going to renovate.  First step is to pull down some badly-installed sheetrock in the entryway to expose the original shiplap boards underneath.  We want to paint those so that we get the effect of having the exposed wood.  She was trying to put together a project plan last night.  For reference, I'm a project manager by trade, so it's clear this wasn't going to go so well.  Two of the steps involve pulling down the existing sheetrock, and finishing the boards underneath, and she could not figure out what order to do this in.  I spent 20 minutes explaining why you had to pull the sheetrock down first before you could paint the boards underneath.  I have no idea how I managed to not run screaming from the building.  She kept saying "I have to think visually".  Ok, I get that, but we finally got to the point where I said "you're ready to paint, but you haven't pulled the sheetrock down yet.  What are  you painting?".  The answer is "sheetrock", not what she was looking for.  I'm still not sure she believes me.

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Just now, Mudcat35 said:

My wife and I recently bought a really old house that we're going to renovate.  First step is to pull down some badly-installed sheetrock in the entryway to expose the original shiplap boards underneath.  We want to paint those so that we get the effect of having the exposed wood.  She was trying to put together a project plan last night.  For reference, I'm a project manager by trade, so it's clear this wasn't going to go so well.  Two of the steps involve pulling down the existing sheetrock, and finishing the boards underneath, and she could not figure out what order to do this in.  I spent 20 minutes explaining why you had to pull the sheetrock down first before you could paint the boards underneath.  I have no idea how I managed to not run screaming from the building.  She kept saying "I have to think visually".  Ok, I get that, but we finally got to the point where I said "you're ready to paint, but you haven't pulled the sheetrock down yet.  What are  you painting?".  The answer is "sheetrock", not what she was looking for.  I'm still not sure she believes me.

oh you poor bastard

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13 minutes ago, Mudcat35 said:

My wife and I recently bought a really old house that we're going to renovate.  First step is to pull down some badly-installed sheetrock in the entryway to expose the original shiplap boards underneath.  We want to paint those so that we get the effect of having the exposed wood.  She was trying to put together a project plan last night.  For reference, I'm a project manager by trade, so it's clear this wasn't going to go so well.  Two of the steps involve pulling down the existing sheetrock, and finishing the boards underneath, and she could not figure out what order to do this in.  I spent 20 minutes explaining why you had to pull the sheetrock down first before you could paint the boards underneath.  I have no idea how I managed to not run screaming from the building.  She kept saying "I have to think visually".  Ok, I get that, but we finally got to the point where I said "you're ready to paint, but you haven't pulled the sheetrock down yet.  What are  you painting?".  The answer is "sheetrock", not what she was looking for.  I'm still not sure she believes me.

This is not someone I would embark upon an expensive DIY home renovation project with. But then again, I don't eat disgusting nutritionally deficient shit like Fritos either, so I guess everyone else around here is envious of your choice of partner.

Edited by Llogg
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21 minutes ago, Llogg said:

This is not someone I would embark upon an expensive DIY home renovation project with. But then again, I don't eat disgusting nutritionally deficient shit like Fritos either, so I guess everyone else around here is envious of your choice of partner.

Nutritionally deficient? I suppose you think bacon is nutritionally deficient because it doesn't have enough vitamin C? What about ribeye?

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57 minutes ago, Llogg said:

This is not someone I would embark upon an expensive DIY home renovation project with. But then again, I don't eat disgusting nutritionally deficient shit like Fritos either, so I guess everyone else around here is envious of your choice of partner.

As opposed to all those other magnificently nutritious salty snacks out there?

Dude, you said something stupid and got called out on it.   When you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

Move on.

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1 hour ago, Mudcat35 said:

My wife and I recently bought a really old house that we're going to renovate.  First step is to pull down some badly-installed sheetrock in the entryway to expose the original shiplap boards underneath.  We want to paint those so that we get the effect of having the exposed wood.  She was trying to put together a project plan last night.  For reference, I'm a project manager by trade, so it's clear this wasn't going to go so well.  Two of the steps involve pulling down the existing sheetrock, and finishing the boards underneath, and she could not figure out what order to do this in.  I spent 20 minutes explaining why you had to pull the sheetrock down first before you could paint the boards underneath.  I have no idea how I managed to not run screaming from the building.  She kept saying "I have to think visually".  Ok, I get that, but we finally got to the point where I said "you're ready to paint, but you haven't pulled the sheetrock down yet.  What are  you painting?".  The answer is "sheetrock", not what she was looking for.  I'm still not sure she believes me.

You really need to document the progress of this renovation by posting pictures here

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14 hours ago, Covri said:

Wife brought home kroger brand corn chips instead of Fritos to make frito pie. Should this go here or in why did you get divorced thread?

 

And yes they are noticeably sucky compared to the real ones. 

Frito pie?

 

When the fuck did we get to TexAgs.

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Just now, MNLonghornFUKM said:
20 minutes ago, G650 said:
This is a site where a substantial amount of posters wear cargo shorts. I'd just let it go and let them eat in filth man.

Lldogg hates fritos and wears cargos. The worst kind

Well shit. I'll leave him to his own devices then.

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6 minutes ago, huge said:

I think that the G man was conflating fritos and cargos.

Remember, this is a guy that says suit pants with belt loops are only for the unwashed masses.

I'd wager the correlation between Fritos eaters and cargo shorts is much higher than Fritos eaters who don't wear cargos.

Edited by G650
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17 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

$240 haircut? That shit better hold up long enough to look good in the casket.

For a cut an color that is on the cheaper side IME.   That it happens only once or twice a year it makes it palpable.   My hair cuts are cheaper and more frequent.

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1 hour ago, TrashMaster G said:

As opposed to all those other magnificently nutritious salty snacks out there?

Dude, you said something stupid and got called out on it.   When you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

Move on.

That does it. I’m gonna make a veggie straw pie and see how that goes. 

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On 3/4/2019 at 11:07 AM, JimmyHoffa said:

 

It was pretty much this. They finally decided on a place, I called to make a reservation and they were full which started the whole process over again. I then made a reservation on my own without female approval and everyone was happy with the outcome. 

 

LMAO! Yeah, they were happy to your face. Because women, bro.

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3 hours ago, Mudcat35 said:

My wife and I recently bought a really old house that we're going to renovate.  First step is to pull down some badly-installed sheetrock in the entryway to expose the original shiplap boards underneath.  We want to paint those so that we get the effect of having the exposed wood.  She was trying to put together a project plan last night.  For reference, I'm a project manager by trade, so it's clear this wasn't going to go so well.  Two of the steps involve pulling down the existing sheetrock, and finishing the boards underneath, and she could not figure out what order to do this in.  I spent 20 minutes explaining why you had to pull the sheetrock down first before you could paint the boards underneath.  I have no idea how I managed to not run screaming from the building.  She kept saying "I have to think visually".  Ok, I get that, but we finally got to the point where I said "you're ready to paint, but you haven't pulled the sheetrock down yet.  What are  you painting?".  The answer is "sheetrock", not what she was looking for.  I'm still not sure she believes me.

Ask her to develop a CPM schedule.  Cost-loaded for bonus points.

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