Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do

[Upgrayedd 5861]

It's like a serial killer list.

[mulletpelini 5220]

likes to fuck alot

[AUS-97HORN 11991]

if she wasnt standing in front of the stupid names, I would have assumed those are the names of the dogs coming to visit my local vets office.

[Trey3216 15450]

1 minute ago, AUS-97HORN said:

if she wasnt standing in front of the stupid names, I would have assumed those are the names of the dogs coming to visit my local vets office.

She was having a Fantasy Father draft 

[TrashMaster G 18036]

49 minutes ago, luke duke said:

I'll take Stupid Names Nobody Won't Make Fun Of for $500, Alex.

[SHOOTER12 8883]

9 hours ago, babysdaddy said:

perfect, thanks son.

Older ladies with nothing to do are always looking at every situation with stink face.  And my wife hates my mom.  I know very few MIL/DIL relationships that work

Sometimes things go great. My mom loved my wife dearly and was so proud I had married a successful doctor. Only she isn't..... poor mom, dementia sucks. She did love Mrs. Shooter dearly though.

God Bless you mom....

[Brew 3049]

1 hour ago, Upgrayedd said:

It's like a serial killer list.

Future stripper would be my guess.

[HenryJames 67124]

1 hour ago, luke duke said:

Tryxie!

[SilasCoade 2622]

1 hour ago, luke duke said:

Not a single one of those is a real fucking name. TFOH

Edited June 5, 2019 by Llogg

[MNLonghornFUKM 8964]

Would

[NeverMarryAStripper 22242]

Did

[luke duke 6447]

if she wasnt standing in front of the stupid names, I would have assumed those are the names of the dogs coming to visit my local vets office.

 

 

 

[HenryJames 67124]

Should have named the kid Chewbarka.

[Cheeseweasel 26439]

11 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Sometimes things go great. My mom loved my wife dearly and was so proud I had married a successful doctor. Only she isn't..... poor mom, dementia sucks. She did love Mrs. Shooter dearly though.

God Bless you mom....

Going thru the same thing with my Mom, bro. Fuck dementia so fucking hard.

[Sandman 3427]

19 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Sometimes things go great. My mom loved my wife dearly and was so proud I had married a successful doctor. Only she isn't..... poor mom, dementia sucks. She did love Mrs. Shooter dearly though.

God Bless you mom....

So you married a shitty doctor? That's still pretty cool.

[mulletpelini 5220]

Just gotta have patience.

[Anastasis 23700]

On 6/4/2019 at 7:07 PM, luke duke said:

I would put up with her shit for a while. 

[lateshow 1319]

Lakynn? Tha fuck kinda name is that?

Edited June 6, 2019 by lateshow

[luke duke 6447]

Lakynn? Tha fuck kinda name is that?

As someone in the comments stated, everyone from Utah is a blond, white, Mormon with a degree from BYU. So in order to distinguish themselves they give their kids dumb names that are derived by taking a syllable from 3 normal names and mashing them together.

[Cheeseweasel 26439]

48 minutes ago, lateshow said:

Lakynn? Tha fuck kinda name is that?

Obviously the mom is lakynn a few brain cells.

[thunderlounge 8324]

1 hour ago, lateshow said:

Lakynn? Tha fuck kinda name is that?

 

New-age hippie stripper name. Kid ain’t even got a chance.

[Reagan1k 3041]

These people are all just playing the long-game to fuck with Starbucks baristas.

[Reagan1k 3041]

dp

Edited June 6, 2019 by Reagan1k
dp

[HenryJames 67124]

1 hour ago, thunderlounge said:

 

New-age hyppie strypper name. Kyd ain’t even got a chance.

fify

[General Specific 3484]

 
New-age hippie stripper name. Kid ain’t even got a chance.

Hey now, our sons and grandsons need to experience girls with daddy issues to!

[Trey3216 15450]

1 hour ago, Reagan1k said:

dp

[gyroprotagonist 2597]

5 hours ago, lateshow said:

Lakynn? Tha fuck kinda name is that?

yeah, how is that pronounced?  Lay'-kin, Luh-kin', El'-uh-kin?  This important issue has been driving me crazy.

[Kennythetiger 9584]

4 hours ago, Reagan1k said:

These people are all just playing the long-game to fuck with Starbucks baristas.

I'm just "Bob" when I order coffee.  Figure it makes their job easier.

[Cheeseweasel 26439]

12 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

I'm just "Bob" when I order coffee.  Figure it makes their job easier.

Boob!!! I have a grande half caf no whip iced mocha for BOOB?!

[Modessit 5665]

I'm just "Bob" when I order coffee.  Figure it makes their job easier.

Battery Operated Boyfriend? It might make your mom's job easier.

[thunderlounge 8324]

1 hour ago, Modessit said:

2 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

I'm just "Bob" when I order coffee.  Figure it makes their job easier.

Battery Operated Boyfriend? It might make your mom's job easier.

 

[DigglerontheHoof 21516]

10 hours ago, lateshow said:

Lakynn? Tha fuck kinda name is that?

A stupid one, just like the rest of them.

[luke duke 6447]

Wife and kids were at the hotel pool

[General Specific 3484]

Wife and kids were at the hotel pool

Well, did the pool guy pull out or what?

[cactusflinthead 27626]

On 6/5/2019 at 6:10 AM, luke duke said:

 

 

 

 

I wandered into Utah for longer than I expected. Those Mormon girls are kinda funny. 

[MNLonghornFUKM 8964]

Wife and kids were at the hotel pool

Your own pizza, peace and quiet, beer, tv to yourself for 2.5 hours. Congrats!

[NeverMarryAStripper 22242]

Puliing out when it arrives is probably how y’all ended up with kids

[luke duke 6447]

1 hour ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

2 hours ago, luke duke said:

Wife and kids were at the hotel pool

Your own pizza, peace and quiet, beer, tv to yourself for 2.5 hours. Congrats!

Why do you think it took me that long to follow up?

[ChickenSandwich 9921]

[T’Boo Ted Marshall 2779]

Lakynn? Tha fuck kinda name is that?

Know of a couple in WF that spelled it Laiken.

[NWBuck 8621]

9 hours ago, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:

Know of a couple in WF that spelled it Laiken.

Takes a Laiken and keeps on tiaken?

[Dennis Taylor 19293]

15 hours ago, luke duke said:

Why do you think it took me that long to follow up?

my guess is phone died from too much facebook/pinterest and she was completely cut off from the rest of civizilation 

[Cheeseweasel 26439]

43 minutes ago, Dennis Taylor said:

my guess is phone died from too much facebook/pinterest and she was completely cut off from the rest of civizilation 

Watch she out for a walk in Hawaii? Do we need to send a rescue crew?

[Longboard Horn 41324]

21 hours ago, ChickenSandwich said:

Hey, it's me! 

[tbone_ 14413]

If I’m here, and you’re here, isn’t this our time?

[BearSchlong 8233]

Wife was vacay planning while I was trying to watch episode 5 of Chernobyl.

Did you guys know that Nova Scotia is a sovereign country?

[HenryJames 67124]

14 hours ago, Dennis Taylor said:

my guess is phone died from too much facebook/pinterest and she was completely cut off from the rest of civizilation 

And couldn’t remember the room number.

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

"Did you know that the zip code in Beverly Hills really is 90210?"

 

I swear to God, she's not usually that dense. She graduated from The By God University of Texas, after all.

[Sandman 3427]

Driving through some rural area today, my wife was taking pics to send to her friend in NYC who loves that shit. She snaps a nice pic, you could see for miles. She said, with awe in her voice, "This looks like a PHOTOGRAPH!", I told her that it was and she took it herself. Got tone at first but she lightened up quick. Said she meant to say postcard. I just laughed.

[BradInATX 9208]

Wife never ever locks the front door. I've been leaning on her about it for awhile because we have a baby and I'm protective etc. She told me the other day that she was going to really take it seriously because she loves our kid.

 

Been locked in the back yard going on 3 hours now. Good thing I have a pool and now 3 lone stars left. Not answering the phone, but I'm not trying that hard to get in