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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do

Spur08

By Spur08
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Modessit

Modessit 5667

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For us to know he needs to update it by letting us know if there were any kind of sexual relations later that night or if he tried to get her interested and she told him how insensitive he was and that she was exhausted and worked so hard on dinner and was so tired she might die....and then messed around on Facebook and Pinterest until 2AM.
 
"Sorry, honey, I'm just too exhausted. I'm going straight to bed - to sleep - right after I watch 3 hour-long episodes of this TV show on the tablet."
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Walden Ponderer

Walden Ponderer 12639

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So, we're still shopping for land on which to build and garden. I'm cool with taking our time because there are a lot of variables. 

I found out today about one I wasn't aware was on our list.

See, some parts of The Triangle are like the hippie elite of Austin on steroids, and while I dig the Liberal vibe, especially in contrast to College Station, I have no desire to live out the real life sequel to Portlandia.

Mostly, Mrs. Ponderer agrees, but this morning, she laid this one on me:

"We don't want to live in any of the neighborhoods where white privilege is so pervasive, but we do want to be able to easily shop there."

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gecko

gecko 1104

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Wait you actually have to go to a quilt convention with her on a Saturday?  Why??  Does she not have “quilt friends” or any friends she could drag to such a event other then you?

I am not attending the quilting convention. Repeat...I AM NOT attending. It’s a mother/daughter thing.
For the record, they design and create really high quality stuff.
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Modessit

Modessit 5667

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By the way....did I mention that I’m not attending the quilting convention?

Also her quilts make great baby gifts. If you’re looking to do something unique as a gift I could get you in the queue.
My grandma used to churn out 3-4 high quality quilts per week by hand. She sold them for several hundred up to $1000 or more. When she was bored she'd watch tv and make lace. Never had a real job her entire life. Farmer's wife who raised 6 kids.
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Armybrat

Armybrat 41412

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13 hours ago, Walden Ponderer said:

So, we're still shopping for land on which to build and garden. I'm cool with taking our time because there are a lot of variables. 

I found out today about one I wasn't aware was on our list.

See, some parts of The Triangle are like the hippie elite of Austin on steroids, and while I dig the Liberal vibe, especially in contrast to College Station, I have no desire to live out the real life sequel to Portlandia.

Mostly, Mrs. Ponderer agrees, but this morning, she laid this one on me:

"We don't want to live in any of the neighborhoods where white privilege is so pervasive, but we do want to be able to easily shop there."

Collie Station burnout?

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Judge Roybeanbag

Judge Roybeanbag 11860

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Not so much stupid as just unfortunately funny.  Went to HEB with my wife Saturday after the game, since it was open and I was already in a foul mood.  We have a floor lamp next to a reading chair that the bulb had gone out on, so "light bulbs" were on the list.  Apparently she didn't completely trust me to remember the exact type of bulb we needed, because as I walked to that section she shouted from 2 aisles away "DON'T FORGET WE NEED A THREE-WAY!".   

No volunteers stepped forward.

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Grade of D as in David

Grade of D as in David 13255

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12 hours ago, Modessit said:
12 hours ago, gecko said:
By the way....did I mention that I’m not attending the quilting convention?

Also her quilts make great baby gifts. If you’re looking to do something unique as a gift I could get you in the queue.

My grandma used to churn out 3-4 high quality quilts per week by hand. She sold them for several hundred up to $1000 or more. When she was bored she'd watch tv and make lace. Never had a real job her entire life. Farmer's wife who raised 6 kids.

ben stiller hal l GIF

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Gil Bang

Gil Bang 26241

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9 hours ago, Walden Ponderer said:

College Station really is the absolute worst of what white people bring to America. Hell, at least in the trashiest parts of the Appalachians, the food is good; College Station doesn't even have that much going for them.

Y'all got dillo though.

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Hate

Hate 20249

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On 10/27/2019 at 5:19 PM, Modessit said:

Next weekend as in the bye week? Sounds like she's doing it right.

I'd rather go to a quilting convention than watch this football team.  At least there will be some GILFs to creep on at the convention. 

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28931

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On October 28, 2019 at 9:26 AM, Judge Roybeanbag said:

 Apparently she didn't completely trust me to remember the exact type of bulb we needed, because as I walked to that section she shouted from 2 aisles away "DON'T FORGET WE NEED A THREE-WAY!".   

No volunteers stepped forward.

As far as you know. 

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Modessit

Modessit 5667

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Wanna good laugh? Here in Carrboro, NC, we have The Armadillo Grill.  If that's "Authentic TexMex" then I'm Mae West.
When I was stationed in Denver in 1988-90, there was an old Pizza Hut that had been turned into a "Mexican restaurant" and advertised a tamale special. I love tamales so me and another guy from San Antonio decided to check it out. All the employees were Chinese, they were "out of tamales", and the food sucked.
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mulletpelini

mulletpelini 5225

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13 hours ago, Modessit said:
On 10/28/2019 at 7:19 PM, Walden Ponderer said:
Wanna good laugh? Here in Carrboro, NC, we have The Armadillo Grill.  If that's "Authentic TexMex" then I'm Mae West.

When I was stationed in Denver in 1988-90, there was an old Pizza Hut that had been turned into a "Mexican restaurant" and advertised a tamale special. I love tamales so me and another guy from San Antonio decided to check it out. All the employees were Chinese, they were "out of tamales", and the food sucked.

and the name of that place was.....Casa Bonita

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Lone Star Horn

Lone Star Horn 2071

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On 10/30/2019 at 7:48 AM, Modessit said:
On 10/28/2019 at 7:19 PM, Walden Ponderer said:
Wanna good laugh? Here in Carrboro, NC, we have The Armadillo Grill.  If that's "Authentic TexMex" then I'm Mae West.

When I was stationed in Denver in 1988-90, there was an old Pizza Hut that had been turned into a "Mexican restaurant" and advertised a tamale special. I love tamales so me and another guy from San Antonio decided to check it out. All the employees were Chinese, they were "out of tamales", and the food sucked.

Back when I was first stationed at Hurlburt Field, Fort Walton Beach, Florida, when my new roommate found out I was from Texas, he asked if I liked Mexican food. I said of course, and he wanted to go to the best Mexican food place in the area, Pancho's. We went, it had the right look, but I didn't look closely enough at the menu. When I ordered a Carne Guisada plate, the waitress asked if I wanted a potato or fries with that. I was stunned, and didn't know what to say. I took the fries, but told my roommate that this is not Mexican food, without beans and rice.

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mulletpelini

mulletpelini 5225

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14 hours ago, Saint Austin said:

Not my wife, but a woman at work saw a hawk perched outside one of our windows. She asked if I thought it was a boy or a girl. I had no idea, but another woman said boy, because she's "pretty sure all hawks are boys."

well in her defense they did all descend from Jurassic Park

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Js1

Js1 87187

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18 hours ago, Saint Austin said:

Not my wife, but a woman at work saw a hawk perched outside one of our windows. She asked if I thought it was a boy or a girl. I had no idea, but another woman said boy, because she's "pretty sure all hawks are boys."

I grew up thinking all dogs were boys and all cats were girls.

Don't ask me, as a 7 year old, how I thought puppies and kittens were born.  

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