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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do

Spur08

By Spur08
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McCroskey
McCroskey

Buddy sent a text today...said his wife decided to shop vac their fireplace and clean up all the ash. When she finished, she turned around and didn’t realize the shop vac lid wasn’t really seated, so

BearCountry11
BearCountry11

From earlier this evening...   My father in law lost his cell phone on the golf course this afternoon.  It was raining so we didn’t have much hope it would still be working but he shares the

RamjetFDO
RamjetFDO

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nnm

nnm 36566

Posted
Posted
2 minutes ago, ztejas said:

 

Who fucking cares.

People who work at Kroger grocery stores in Phoenix. 
People who are looking for grocery stores in Phoenix. 
People who take the time to quote and comment on that post. 
 

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ztejas

ztejas 43528

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, nnm said:

People who work at Kroger grocery stores in Phoenix. 
People who are looking for grocery stores in Phoenix. 
People who take the time to quote and comment on that post. 
 

I think we are taking the original joke and beating it into a pulp at this point. 

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Upgrayedd

Upgrayedd 5818

Posted
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1 hour ago, nnm said:

People who work at Kroger grocery stores in Phoenix. 
People who are looking for grocery stores in Phoenix. 
People who take the time to quote and comment on that post. 
 

I believe those shown are all Frys.  Kroger parent.  Frys branded.

Driving around Phoenix looking for Kroger, and driving by Frys, because Google maps says there is one there, is something stupid my ex-wife would do.

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CycleTex87

CycleTex87 2981

Posted
Posted
6 hours ago, mininghorn88 said:

Since she obviously does not have proper gas cans, how does she expect to transfer that gas into a tank? I know of several possible remedies but for some reason I do not think that she has thought that far ahead.

I mean that’s way down the line of problems needing solved.

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SquishMitten

SquishMitten 10425

Posted
Posted
This thread should teach you things. Things like - you should've known she wouldn't ever come up with a place. Honestly that's your job anyways. 

Yeah. For most women, once kids are in the picture Mother’s Day becomes more important than their birthday or Valentine’s. Until the kids are grown, it’s our job to make it special for them. Took me a while to learn that lesson, and I still manage to fuck it up sometimes.
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SquishMitten

SquishMitten 10425

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There is a chance that the gas will make that plastic soft and could rupture and spill. Dumb.


^^ Pretty likely unless she puts them into something else within a couple days.

She could have bought 1-gallon water jugs, dumped the water...


Even thinner plastic. They wouldn’t last long at all. Much better for transport though.
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kmac30

kmac30 416

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Posted

My wife won 2 of the raffles our girls softball all stars team had. One of them was $500 cash. She feels guilty. I told her to send in the shit money and take this as a sign. I also outlined
3 different locations in our house she could keep that money that would be safe.

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ROFL BOX

ROFL BOX 6649

Posted
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On 5/14/2021 at 9:15 AM, SquishMitten said:


Yeah. For most women, once kids are in the picture Mother’s Day becomes more important than their birthday or Valentine’s. Until the kids are grown, it’s our job to make it special for them. Took me a while to learn that lesson, and I still manage to fuck it up sometimes.

Crayon hooked me up with some quality product for M's Day & I still didn't get any.

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ROFL BOX

ROFL BOX 6649

Posted
Posted
On 5/15/2021 at 11:23 AM, Baboontyme said:

Stop. Putting. The. Fucking. Tongs. In. The. Fucking. Drawer. With. The. Fucking. Tongs. Facing. Fucking. Out.

Stop. Putting.  Wooden.  Handled.  ANYTHING.  In.  The.  Fucking.  Dishwasher.  Especially.  Steak.  Knives.

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nnm

nnm 36566

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Buzzrock said:

Debated shitty parking thread or this one, but this one’s more fun.

Apparently it’s park wherever the fuck you want day at our house:

9abbf5c7f1384ffcc76537b60582843a.jpg

So I joined in:

0d5c1babbe11a994599dcd03330a6ef6.jpg

Wtf is with the coach light centered over the garage?

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ztejas

ztejas 43528

Posted
Posted
4 minutes ago, Sam Lin said:

Forgot whose wife had the drink cover idea? Not sure if here or TOS. Just saw this shared, seems to be exactly the product:

921046199_nightcapdrinkcover.thumb.JPG.4d9575b345a3b0586980f043e6e61f15.JPG

A girl pitched this in my entrepreneurship class in college as her business plan project. We all thought it was dumb. I still think it's dumb. I also bet they sell a lot of those things.

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Dennis Taylor

Dennis Taylor 18853

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23 minutes ago, ztejas said:

A girl pitched this in my entrepreneurship class in college as her business plan project. We all thought it was dumb. I still think it's dumb. I also bet they sell a lot of those things.

A business plan designed to get women to overpay for useless shit has never failed 

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markstanco

markstanco 12586

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Just now:

Mrs MS: can you believe school is out in under a week?

Me: it's next Thursday, so, not under a week.

Her: you can't count weekend days

Me: Yes you can, but if you didn't it is still 8 business days until next Thursday.

Her: But they don't really do anything the last 2 or 3 days.

I let her win that one by not replying and just laughing.

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After irth

After irth 1243

Posted
Posted
15 hours ago, markstanco said:

Just now:

Mrs MS: can you believe school is out in under a week?

Me: it's next Thursday, so, not under a week.

Her: you can't count weekend days

Me: Yes you can, but if you didn't it is still 8 business days until next Thursday.

Her: But they don't really do anything the last 2 or 3 days.

I let her win that one by not replying and just laughing.

You two sound made for each other.

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Sawbonz

Sawbonz 27584

Posted
Posted
On 5/4/2021 at 12:50 AM, TTU13 said:

So backstory, my wife’s dad passed away from cancer (pancreatic) at a young age. So I get she’s sensitive to the subject.

I like the occasional dip and also smoke the occasional cigar. Typically I buy cigars in bulk (way cheaper). She always gives me shit when I buy it and says “fine enjoy your cancer”. Makes it seem like I smoke a cigar daily, instead it’s usually 2 a month. The cigars I buy I usually only smoke half of them and share the other half with whoever I smoke them with.

Fast forward to yesterday we go to a cigar lounge to celebrate her brother moving close to us. She’s ripping those little cigars that look like blunts like they’re going out of style and saying how fun the cigar bar is.

When she gets cancer you’ll never hear the end of it

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