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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do

Spur08

By Spur08
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BearCountry11

BearCountry11 1234

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

It didn't have anything to do with beer or wine.  It was all about her asserting her dominance over you and then rubbing your face in it.  Kind of like when another dog pees in your yard while your dog looks helplessly on through the window.

Oh it was 100% a power move.  I was livid.  She ended up ordering wine afterwards but her reasoning for not going to the sports bar was because she did NOT want to drink beer.  

As a result, I did get a “get out of jail free” card with going to the in-laws on Sunday and can watch hours of uninterrupted football instead.  

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Buddy sent a text today...said his wife decided to shop vac their fireplace and clean up all the ash. When she finished, she turned around and didn’t realize the shop vac lid wasn’t really seated, so

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Trey3216

Trey3216 15346

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11 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

^^^^

Once sent my wife to the HEB five minutes from my house to get one ingredient that I needed for the dinner I was already preparing (and the reason why I needed it was that she used the last of it and didn't write it on the grocery list that's on the fridge, so I had no idea we didn't have it).  

Took her 40 minutes to return.  She "saw people that she knew."  

"Did you tell them that your husband is at home waiting for this ingredient so that he can finish dinner for the family?  I guess not.  Maybe you should have?"

TONE.  

The butcher liked the cut of her jib

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Angry Gorilla

Angry Gorilla 1766

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Posted

My wife owns a small women's clothing boutique.  She is constantly bringing home clothes from the store that she either has to mail out, get altered or dry cleaned, or return to the designer.  Every time she takes all the hangers in the closet to hang them on her little hanging rack she uses.  Now, every time I take my laundry into the closet to fold, I have maybe 2 hangers left.  

I've asked her calmly and politely many times and offered to buy her as many hangers as she needs from Amazon.  Yet every week I have no hangers.  Now when I confront her about it, instead of asking nicely I tell her (without raising my voice) to stop taking my hangers and to buy some if she needs them.  She then starts acting like I'm OJ with some uncontrollable temper and am about to snap at any second.  That makes me 10X more ragey than the hangers.  I would rather her look me in the eye and say "fuck you, I'll use  your hangers whenever I damn well please" than start trying to reverse the situation and act like the victim.

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NeverMarryAStripper

NeverMarryAStripper 21880

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Angry Gorilla said:

My wife owns a small women's clothing boutique.  She is constantly bringing home clothes from the store that she either has to mail out, get altered or dry cleaned, or return to the designer.  Every time she takes all the hangers in the closet to hang them on her little hanging rack she uses.  Now, every time I take my laundry into the closet to fold, I have maybe 2 hangers left.  

I've asked her calmly and politely many times and offered to buy her as many hangers as she needs from Amazon.  Yet every week I have no hangers.  Now when I confront her about it, instead of asking nicely I tell her (without raising my voice) to stop taking my hangers and to buy some if she needs them.  She then starts acting like I'm OJ with some uncontrollable temper and am about to snap at any second.  That makes me 10X more ragey than the hangers.  I would rather her look me in the eye and say "fuck you, I'll use  your hangers whenever I damn well please" than start trying to reverse the situation and act like the victim.

 

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Buffsoldier

Buffsoldier 1895

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Posted
24 minutes ago, Angry Gorilla said:

I did order 100 hangers.  And yes it's not about the hangers, it's the attempt to play victim every time she knows she fucked up.

1. Go to her store, during business hours, while she is there.

2. Pull the clothes off of 20 or 30 hangers and drop them on the floor.  Look her in the eye while you do so, and don't say a single word.

3. Leave with your hangers.

4. ?

5. Profit.

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BearCountry11

BearCountry11 1234

Posted
Posted
13 hours ago, BearCountry11 said:

Wife and I decided yesterday that we would go to a sports bar to watch Horns play VCU today.  I’m excited because this woman rarely wants to watch sports.  

I get home from work and she immediately tells me she wants to go to this wine bar because she is in the mood for wine and not beer.  I’m pissed because I want to watch the game and this wine bar doesn’t have a tv (wine selection at sports bar is lacking).  After a brief argument we go to the wine bar.  We get our table and my wife orders a fucking Stella Artois.  I stare in disbelief.  

Wife:  “well you were talking about drinking beer so much it made me want a beer!”

 

Need to post a follow up.  

Getting ready to go to work today and wife hits me with “I actually really liked that Stella last night.  We should buy some!”

 

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davidg

davidg 4036

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, Angry Gorilla said:

My wife owns a small women's clothing boutique.  She is constantly bringing home clothes from the store that she either has to mail out, get altered or dry cleaned, or return to the designer.  Every time she takes all the hangers in the closet to hang them on her little hanging rack she uses.  Now, every time I take my laundry into the closet to fold, I have maybe 2 hangers left.  

I've asked her calmly and politely many times and offered to buy her as many hangers as she needs from Amazon.  Yet every week I have no hangers.  Now when I confront her about it, instead of asking nicely I tell her (without raising my voice) to stop taking my hangers and to buy some if she needs them.  She then starts acting like I'm OJ with some uncontrollable temper and am about to snap at any second.  That makes me 10X more ragey than the hangers.  I would rather her look me in the eye and say "fuck you, I'll use  your hangers whenever I damn well please" than start trying to reverse the situation and act like the victim.

Do you only have like 4 or 5 hangers?  Seems like after the second time, you would just go buy a shit ton of hangers anyway  and be done with it.  One reason I like the wire dry cleaners hangers is because my wife wont hang her shit on them.  

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Angry Gorilla

Angry Gorilla 1766

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Do you only have like 4 or 5 hangers?  Seems like after the second time, you would just go buy a shit ton of hangers anyway  and be done with it.  One reason I like the wire dry cleaners hangers is because my wife wont hang her shit on them.  


I should have bought the hangers after the first time. My mistake was asking my wife nicely to not take them and thinking she would. I guess this belongs in the stupid husband thread.


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Thatguy

Thatguy 8685

Posted
Posted
On 12/4/2018 at 8:21 PM, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:


Wait just a dam minute here. I thought Derka was the only black guy on this site?

   Don't worry. We aren't taking over. There demographic here is much like the Demographic at Texas. That's the same thing I tell my neighbors as well.

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mulletpelini

mulletpelini 5210

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Angry Gorilla said:

 


I should have bought the hangers after the first time. My mistake was asking my wife nicely to not take them and thinking she would. I guess this belongs in the stupid husband thread.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

All you had to do was buy hangers to get more hangers.  Because that's the logical thing that will happen now.

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ABSR

ABSR 5309

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Posted

My birthday is coming up, so last weekend my wife asked me "ABSR, where do you want to go for your family birthday dinner?"

We are going to be at an event before hand, so I think about it, pick a place that is near the location, nice, but not super nice, and tell her "I want to go to X."

To which she replies, "No, that's not a good place for your birthday.  Where else would you want to go."

So I then say, "Well, then let's go to restaurant Y."

To which she replies "No, that's not a good place either.  Where else?"

So I then say "What do you think?"

So she proceeds to look on her phone at places and Yelp reviews and picks one that we have never been to before, and has cuisine which she and the kids can't eat (Italian and they are Gluten Free).   I point this out, but she says they have things for them, so I say "Great!  Let's go there!"

She then says, "But you haven't looked at it, you need to go on line and look at it."

So I pretend to look it up on my iPad, say it really looks good, and that we should go there.

She says okay, and then tells me two other families are joining us.

... There have been worse birthdays.

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Buffsoldier

Buffsoldier 1895

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27 minutes ago, ABSR said:

To which she replies, "No, that's not a good place for your birthday.  Where else would you want to go."

So I then say, "Well, then let's go to restaurant Y."

To which she replies "No, that's not a good place either.  Where else?"

In the immortal words:

"I don't condone it. But I understand it."

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4th and 5

4th and 5 4914

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, Angry Gorilla said:

My wife owns a small women's clothing boutique.  She is constantly bringing home clothes from the store that she either has to mail out, get altered or dry cleaned, or return to the designer.  Every time she takes all the hangers in the closet to hang them on her little hanging rack she uses.  Now, every time I take my laundry into the closet to fold, I have maybe 2 hangers left.  

I've asked her calmly and politely many times and offered to buy her as many hangers as she needs from Amazon.  Yet every week I have no hangers.  Now when I confront her about it, instead of asking nicely I tell her (without raising my voice) to stop taking my hangers and to buy some if she needs them.  She then starts acting like I'm OJ with some uncontrollable temper and am about to snap at any second.  That makes me 10X more ragey than the hangers.  I would rather her look me in the eye and say "fuck you, I'll use  your hangers whenever I damn well please" than start trying to reverse the situation and act like the victim.

how many hangers - no matter how many I throw out -  do we have in our closet?

 

tenor.gif?itemid=10135114

 

PM me your address and I'll send you a box full 

 

 

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8800

Posted
Posted
On 12/3/2018 at 6:10 AM, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Defeated it. We started unloading storage pods to move into the new house last night...she has these aged, broken, spring popped, heavy, awkward to lift, red, ugly old ass couches that she bought on her own before I met her.. she wanted me and my BIL to carry to the unfinished basement that has stairs with a hair pin turn so tough to maneuver furniture thats actually worth something. anyways she wanted the couches down there so its a place to sit when we have tornadoes.

 

our city hasnt seen a tornado do any damage or kill anyone since 1957. Yea we get warnings/tornadoes out in fields miles from here but nothing like tornado alley.

 

anyways, after about 5 min of back and forth banter...we're bringing the couches to the dump and ill bring down lawn chairs if we need a place to sit out an F5.

It's a tarp,.....

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Brew

Brew 3049

Posted
Posted
9 hours ago, Buffsoldier said:

1. Go to her store, during business hours, while she is there.

2. Pull the clothes off of 20 or 30 hangers and drop them on the floor.  Look her in the eye while you do so, and don't say a single word.

3. Leave with your hangers.

4. ?

5. Profit.

5 should be edited to leave half your shit. However, that would be a better long-term financial decision than a money pit otherwise known as a clothing boutique.

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Horns1

Horns1 41

Posted
Posted
11 hours ago, Angry Gorilla said:

My wife owns a small women's clothing boutique.  She is constantly bringing home clothes from the store that she either has to mail out, get altered or dry cleaned, or return to the designer.  Every time she takes all the hangers in the closet to hang them on her little hanging rack she uses.  Now, every time I take my laundry into the closet to fold, I have maybe 2 hangers left.  

I've asked her calmly and politely many times and offered to buy her as many hangers as she needs from Amazon.  Yet every week I have no hangers.  Now when I confront her about it, instead of asking nicely I tell her (without raising my voice) to stop taking my hangers and to buy some if she needs them.  She then starts acting like I'm OJ with some uncontrollable temper and am about to snap at any second.  That makes me 10X more ragey than the hangers.  I would rather her look me in the eye and say "fuck you, I'll use  your hangers whenever I damn well please" than start trying to reverse the situation and act like the victim.

User name checks out.

 

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ShaggyBevo RIP

ShaggyBevo RIP 3868

Posted
Posted (edited)
17 minutes ago, PilotsError said:

I like how you idiots think buying more hangers is going to solve the problem, as if she wouldn't take every one of them as well.

This. They'd have to be camo or sports team prints for her not to take them.

Make her buy the hangers so she can deduct them as a business expense.

Edited by ShaggyBevo RIP
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