PLEASE slow down in parking lots

[Nonbryan 173]

A friend of mine lost his 3 yr. old daughter this weekend in an accident that could have easily been prevented.  Please SLOW DOWN when driving in parking lots, especially around events where there are lots of children around.   Next time you are driving in a park, or near a school, or leaving your kids soccer game, put your phone away, slow down and be aware that at any moment, a child may run out in a parking lot and your actions could drastically change your life and others lives. 

[BabaYaga 15,302]

Horrible.  Noted.  I drive a large truck.  Few years back, not yards from our house neighbors were out front (both sides of the street) being friendly, talking.  I was creeping along as there were a lot of cars parked on the street.  Kids says something, I divert my eyes, look back and see a flash of blonde curls flash over and in front of my hood.  I was maybe going 5mph, so I stop.  Dad's screaming.  Little girl starts crying.  My hands would not stop shaking for close to 10 minutes.  She has darted out to see her friend between two parked cars.  

Please people, situational awareness.  For you.  And others.  

[Samson's Wig 3,193]

Yeesh.  I have young ones and this stuff scares the hell out of me.  Even walking them to school people drive too fast and don't pay attention when they just dropped off their own kids.   I can't imagine what a horrible scene that was and here's hoping your buddy can find his way to peace.

[HOOKEM4 5,039]

Jesus, I cant imagine going through that. 

[High Plains Drifter 11,050]

Be strong for your buddy, OP.

 

[Updawg 2,278]

Horrible. Scary.

[Your Mom 4,827]

Terrible. I’m sorry for your friend’s family. Parking lots scared the shit out of me when my kids were toddlers. They are far more dangerous for kids than a busy street is. 

[HouTex 1,887]

Not to take away the good message of the OP, parents hold your kid’s hand in busy areas where drivers might be going fast and/or might not be able to react in time if your kid does what kids tend to do.

[Lhorn 4,928]

That’s horribly and makes me ragey. Imagine taking a life like this over something so senseless. I pray that the parents can someday find peace and that the driver lives a miserable life - hopefully a short one. Unbelievable. Slow the fuck down people. Trust me, you aren’t that important to be risking the lives of others.

[Gene Parmesan 4,008]

It is scary.  As much as you try to drill into your 4 year olds head about a parking lot nothing is stopping the impulse of them to jerk their hand out of yours to look at a shiny object they spotted. 

[Coelenterate Fuccboi 13,119]

The risks we take behind the wheel to arrive somewhere a few seconds to a minute faster is unbelievable at times.

[Drew 2,499]

I had an instance where I was coming around a curve on a street in a residential area, not going over 25 or so, saw a young teen/older kid shooting hoops with some other kids.  he looked right at me coming and I take my foot off the gas, then he takes a shot, misses, and the basketball starts bouncing right over towards my car as I'm staring to pass(I had pulled to the far side of the street as far away as I could go).

Shit you not, the kid chases the ball INTO my car.  I can say that because he hit/dented my front driver fender, then busted my side mirror.  I jerked away from him as I saw him and ended up jumping the curb.

 

Obviously wasn't my fault, as nothing I could do short of completely stopping way before I got to his driveway...but of course his dad runs out the house and is mad at me for "hitting his kid" when ALL the evidence clearly shows me turning away, driving slow, and that the kid hit me, not the other way around.  Luckily an off duty cop(I know), was watering his grass and saw the whole thing and deescalated the situation(that can happen).

 

Needless to say, you always gotta be looking out for everything. Sometimes there are just things you can't avoid.

[wood 11,230]

2 hours ago, Nonbryan said:

A friend of mine lost his 3 yr. old daughter this weekend in an accident that could have easily been prevented.  Please SLOW DOWN when driving in parking lots, especially around events where there are lots of children around.   Next time you are driving in a park, or near a school, or leaving your kids soccer game, put your phone away, slow down and be aware that at any moment, a child may run out in a parking lot and your actions could drastically change your life and others lives. 

I'm so sorry to hear this. Sickening.

I'd also add residential streets as a place to just take it a little extra slow.

Quote

She has darted out to see her friend between two parked cars.  

This is the biggest danger in the neighborhoods imho, along with kids shooting out from driveways on their bikes, etc.

 

Last year when my 13 yo was 12, he rode to HEB (when it was open) to grab something. Mom had already shown him the safest way to go, but he got careless. A little while later there's a knock on our door and there's this woman standing there with my kid, looking like a ghost. She brought him home after he rode into the front right corner of her car. Taco'd his front wheel, but he was fine. She was a wreck. Left so quick we didn't even get her name or get a chance to look at her car to see if we needed to pay for any damage. Probably thought we were assholes that might sue her. My kid had just jumped on his bike and rode down the sidewalk in front of the store and into a crosswalk across the side lot beside the store. The lady was screened from him by a parked car, so even though she was going very slowly, neither of them could react in time to avoid the collision. Needless to say we have gone over it many times since then about how lucky he was and reinforced that he is to get off his bike and walk from now on once he gets to the parking lot. 

Edited October 1, 2019 by wood

[Brisketexan 105,170]

18 minutes ago, Lhorn said:

That’s horribly and makes me ragey. Imagine taking a life like this over something so senseless. I pray that the parents can someday find peace and that the driver lives a miserable life - hopefully a short one. Unbelievable. Slow the fuck down people. Trust me, you aren’t that important to be risking the lives of others.

Maybe I don't have all the facts, but in the reporting on this horrible story, I haven't seen any reporting that the driver was driving unreasonably fast or recklessly.  The OP's point is well-taken -- slowing down and keeping your head on a swivel in a parking lot may enable you to save a life, and that's a good message.

But as for the driver who hit this little girl....there but for the grace of God go I.  We've all driven 15mph+ through a parking lot.  Any one of us could have that moment where someone darts from between cars, or from out of our vision, and it's unavoidable.  Hell, see some posts on this page.  See any of us who have hit and killed an animal while driving (I have, in spite of my best efforts).  I suspect that the driver in this case is in their own hell as well.  It's an awful damned tragedy for everyone involved.  And unless some facts come out that the driver was driving recklessly, I can't imagine wishing the driver any more pain than they're already in.

I know someone who killed a pedestrian in an unavoidable accident (as in, full police investigation and determination of same).  Doesn't really matter.  The only upside is that he didn't go to jail.  But he has to live with that fact every day, and it's changed him.  The universe can be a merciless bitch.

[TwiceHorn 31,511]

Yeah, in the "average" case of this happening, God forbid, you don't have to wish anything extra on the driver.  

[Bevo 13,589]

22 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

I know someone who killed a pedestrian in an unavoidable accident (as in, full police investigation and determination of same).  Doesn't really matter.  The only upside is that he didn't go to jail.  But he has to live with that fact every day, and it's changed him.  The universe can be a merciless bitch.

I wonder if the decision whether or not to prosecute is subjective at times. Years ago I was entering an on-ramp in San Francisco (onto 101) and a homeless guy ran across the on-ramp wearing dark clothes (with no obvious street light). It wasn't so close but it obviously scared me a bit. If I had hit the guy, would I be prosecuted? What if I had had a beer that night?

[Brisketexan 105,170]

14 minutes ago, Bevo said:

I wonder if the decision whether or not to prosecute is subjective at times. Years ago I was entering an on-ramp in San Francisco (onto 101) and a homeless guy ran across the on-ramp wearing dark clothes (with no obvious street light). It wasn't so close but it obviously scared me a bit. If I had hit the guy, would I be prosecuted? What if I had had a beer that night?

In my friend's case, he had been drinking, so I can tell you what happened there.  They examined each issue separately -- was he intoxicated, and did he commit intoxication manslaughter?

They weren't sure they could make a case on intoxication - didn't register that high, but alcohol was present.  But the real determining factor was that the investigation found that NO driver -- sober, drunk, in between - could have avoided the collision. When you're going the legal posted speed (say, 40 mph), and someone jumps out of the dark directly in front of you (not at a legal crosswalk)....there's nothing Mario Andretti could have done.

You would have had a lousy time with law enforcement.  You'd have spent a lot on a lawyer.  You'd have to live with the image of that man's face hitting your windshield as he died.  But you probably wouldn't have been prosecuted.

Sometimes, there's nothing you can do.  And honestly, as a human being, that's the realization that terrifies me the most.  I can drive perfectly my whole life, but if the moment comes and there's an unavoidable accident, someone else may die.  I may die.  And there's nothing I can do to control it.  It's just damned awful.

[strangulation! 1,716]

i always thought that if you were drunk then your car wasn't even supposed to be there, so that's another standard altogether.

[Brisketexan 105,170]

23 minutes ago, strangulation! said:

i always thought that if you were drunk then your car wasn't even supposed to be there, so that's another standard altogether.

Nope.  

For example, let's say you're drunk.  But you stop at a red light.  The light turns green.  You go, at a normal speed....and the (sober) jackass coming across, from a blind corner where nobody can see him coming, runs the red, hits your front end at 60 mph, rips your car apart, and his flips into a light pole, killing him and his passenger.  Even though you were drunk, that didn't CAUSE the accident -- him running the red light and speeding did.

You being drunk is sure as hell going to subject you to greater scrutiny, and a zealous DA could try and make the case, but it wouldn't be a good one.

[Sbbruin 21,865]

This is one of my greatest fears.  My stupid teens still don't look where they are going in parking lots or crossing the street half the time. It boggles my mind.

When I was 4, I was hit darting across the street.  It is one of my first memories and I still recall it in detail.  I was playing catch (football) with my older brother.  Ball bounces across the street.  I run across, pick it up, and then just immediately run back.  It is near the corner, so the driver was going pretty slow.  But he turned the corner and I can see the big white corner of the car hitting me square in the face.  I bounced off, bloodied face, but OK (of course I screamed my head off though).  If I was one step further ahead, it could have ended very badly, and very early, for me.

[Bevo 13,589]

 

1 hour ago, Brisketexan said:

They weren't sure they could make a case on intoxication - didn't register that high, but alcohol was present.  But the real determining factor was that the investigation found that NO driver -- sober, drunk, in between - could have avoided the collision. When you're going the legal posted speed (say, 40 mph), and someone jumps out of the dark directly in front of you (not at a legal crosswalk)....there's nothing Mario Andretti could have done.
 

It seems like without a Go Pro on your dash that it would be impossible to determine whether the driver had enough time to react. Awhile back someone posted a video of a guy crossing through the regular lanes into the carpool lane in Houston. Hearing the story, it was impossible to tell whether he could have avoided the accident. After watching the dashcam, there was no doubt. It made me a believer. Although I guess if I was in the wrong, it would be easy for the police to use my own footage against me.

Edited October 1, 2019 by Bevo

[RPM 26,327]

Walking out of a restaurant one night many years ago after having dinner with friends & family when I see my 4 year old niece fly past me running as fast as she can. I just managed to grab her by the hair right as a pickup went by. She was screaming and wailing about me pulling her hair until she started screaming and wailing about her Mom whipping her ass in the parking lot in front of God and everyone.

[ernest_t_bass 1,196]

Such terrible news, OP.  

I still hold my 9.5 year old daughter's hand in parking lots and crossing streets.  And I don't give a fuck what anyone says about it.  Still make her make the decisions, make her look, etc.  But people are stupid.  Had a dumb fuck in a truck come speeding through a Taco Bell parking lot.  Missed her by a solid 5-10 yards, but she made the comment of how fast he was going, and that she could have been hit.  I loathe parking lot drivers.

[Bevo 13,589]

Had a patient ask if this happened in RR

[conVINCEd 21,469]

I watched one of my friends in the first grade get blasted by a pickup while  chasing a ball into the street.  I remember every second of what happened.  My mom told me to run three streets over and get his mom.  In hindsight I was probably wasn’t the best person to deliver that news to his mom, but I vividly remember her beating the shit out of the driver, who apparently had a case of empty beer cans in the bed of his truck.  My friend spent a month in the hospital, but was eventually fine, and he grew up to become a yell leader at aggy, so as a wise man once said in Charlie Wislon’s War once said, “we’ll see.”

[futureman 22,507]

3 hours ago, Lhorn said:

That’s horribly and makes me ragey. Imagine taking a life like this over something so senseless. I pray that the parents can someday find peace and that the driver lives a miserable life - hopefully a short one. Unbelievable. Slow the fuck down people. Trust me, you aren’t that important to be risking the lives of others.

it was a tragic accident you nutcase. 

[Nonbryan 173]

56 minutes ago, Bevo said:

Had a patient ask if this happened in RR

Yes, it happened in RR

[wood 11,230]

1 hour ago, ernest_t_bass said:

Such terrible news, OP.  

I still hold my 9.5 year old daughter's hand in parking lots and crossing streets.  And I don't give a fuck what anyone says about it.  Still make her make the decisions, make her look, etc.  But people are stupid.  Had a dumb fuck in a truck come speeding through a Taco Bell parking lot.  Missed her by a solid 5-10 yards, but she made the comment of how fast he was going, and that she could have been hit.  I loathe parking lot drivers.

People have something to say about you holding your 9 yo kid's hand? WTF?

[ernest_t_bass 1,196]

39 minutes ago, wood said:

People have something to say about you holding your 9 yo kid's hand? WTF?

Are you familiar with Shaggy Surly?

[wood 11,230]

7 minutes ago, ernest_t_bass said:

Are you familiar with Shaggy Surly?

Oh yeah ... that.

[Lhorn 4,928]

4 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Maybe I don't have all the facts, but in the reporting on this horrible story, I haven't seen any reporting that the driver was driving unreasonably fast or recklessly.  The OP's point is well-taken -- slowing down and keeping your head on a swivel in a parking lot may enable you to save a life, and that's a good message.

Point taken.  You are right, we don't know that the driver's speed was excessive.  My response was clearly glib in retrospect and somewhat rooted in the belief that in general people drive too fast through neighborhoods and parking lots.  As a parent, I've had thoughts of similar things happening to my kids and it's terrifying.  I would think that someone driving through a parking lot near kids/soccer fields would be crawling.  Assuming they were being reckless is an unfair assumption i shouldn't have made, but I'm not willing to concede that they were being vigilant either.  Probably somewhere in between.  With regards to the trauma suffered by the driver, I'm sure he feels terrible but my sadness with regards to this incident lies entirely with the child and his family.   

[luke duke 6,413]

A friend of mine lost his 3 yr. old daughter this weekend in an accident that could have easily been prevented.  Please SLOW DOWN when driving in parking lots, especially around events where there are lots of children around.   Next time you are driving in a park, or near a school, or leaving your kids soccer game, put your phone away, slow down and be aware that at any moment, a child may run out in a parking lot and your actions could drastically change your life and others lives. 

I know the guy too. It’s a horrible situation.

[luke duke 6,413]

I watched one of my friends in the first grade get blasted by a pickup while  chasing a ball into the street.  I remember every second of what happened.  My mom told me to run three streets over and get his mom.  In hindsight I was probably wasn’t the best person to deliver that news to his mom, but I vividly remember her beating the shit out of the driver, who apparently had a case of empty beer cans in the bed of his truck.  My friend spent a month in the hospital, but was eventually fine, and he grew up to become a yell leader at aggy, so as a wise man once said in Charlie Wislon’s War once said, “we’ll see.”

These two statements are contradictory.

[fattyflattie 4,639]

It apparently only knocked the brain cells out of him. 

Edited October 2, 2019 by fattyflattie
Forgot to quote Luke

[Asithappens 974]

22 hours ago, Nonbryan said:

A friend of mine lost his 3 yr. old daughter this weekend in an accident that could have easily been prevented.  Please SLOW DOWN when driving in parking lots, especially around events where there are lots of children around.   Next time you are driving in a park, or near a school, or leaving your kids soccer game, put your phone away, slow down and be aware that at any moment, a child may run out in a parking lot and your actions could drastically change your life and others lives. 

Good psa.

But are there really events with lots of kids around in parking lots? 

Yeah, we should drive slower but where are the parents?

[BabaYaga 15,302]

19 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Sometimes, there's nothing you can do.  And honestly, as a human being, that's the realization that terrifies me the most.  I can drive perfectly my whole life, but if the moment comes and there's an unavoidable accident, someone else may die.  I may die.  And there's nothing I can do to control it.  It's just damned awful.

True.  But there is a VAST chasm between what you can control and what you cannot.  It's a case study in situational awareness.  Control all that you can, when you can, and carry that message over to those around you.  Be your own best bet.  Have your mind present on the moment when you enter into a 6,000+lb block of moving steel.

If your time comes, it comes.  At that time, my own garden will have been tended.

[Nonbryan 173]

22 minutes ago, Asithappens said:

Good psa.

But are there really events with lots of kids around in parking lots? 

Yeah, we should drive slower but where are the parents?

Yes, most of the events in my life have lots of kids around parking lots.  Baseball fields, football fields, soccer fields, school, swimming pool, the park, Longhorn games, etc.....  If you don't have children, you may not be as dialed in on this one, but hopefully this thread can save someone else from a life of regret and misery that this family and this driver are experiencing right now.  Honestly, kids are just the subject matter here, but this pertains to all people regardless of age.  We all have our heads in our phones and shit can go down fast.  As shown here, it can have permanent repercussions.

And the parents were right there with the child holding hands.  Shit happens fast.  Kids have lots of energy and are eager to see the world!  Driving is a big responsibility and we need to be reminded at times of what that responsibility entails.

Edited October 2, 2019 by Nonbryan

[Asithappens 974]

1 hour ago, Nonbryan said:

Yes, most of the events in my life have lots of kids around parking lots.  Baseball fields, football fields, soccer fields, school, swimming pool, the park, Longhorn games, etc.....  If you don't have children, you may not be as dialed in on this one, but hopefully this thread can save someone else from a life of regret and misery that this family and this driver are experiencing right now.  Honestly, kids are just the subject matter here, but this pertains to all people regardless of age.  We all have our heads in our phones and shit can go down fast.  As shown here, it can have permanent repercussions.

And the parents were right there with the child holding hands.  Shit happens fast.  Kids have lots of energy and are eager to see the world!  Driving is a big responsibility and we need to be reminded at times of what that responsibility entails.

Most of those venues have parking lots, yeah, but are some distance from them. 

I have kids and as a parent this isn't an issue of speeders as much as negligent parents. 

Watch your kids. THAT'S the real message you need to convey.

[Gene Parmesan 4,008]

That is absolutely the appropriate response.

[Nonbryan 173]

27 minutes ago, Asithappens said:

Most of those venues have parking lots, yeah, but are some distance from them. 

I have kids and as a parent this isn't an issue of speeders as much as negligent parents. 

Watch your kids. THAT'S the real message you need to convey.

Well, you don't know the facts here and couldn't be more wrong.  I'm sorry you feel the need to appeal for attention in such a somber moment.

[Nice Guy Eddie 13,515]

52 minutes ago, Asithappens said:

Most of those venues have parking lots, yeah, but are some distance from them. 

I have kids and as a parent this isn't an issue of speeders as much as negligent parents. 

Watch your kids. THAT'S the real message you need to convey.

Yep, in many cases it takes several points of failure for an accident to happen. Kids start to play chase and run out from between 2 cars. The drivers needs to be alert but the parents need to stop the kids chasing each other.  I've seen parents staring at their phones while their kids are running around too.

I don't know this exact situation but the blame is usually more with the distracted parent than the distracted driver.  Very sad when this happens.

[Asithappens 974]

28 minutes ago, Nonbryan said:

Well, you don't know the facts here and couldn't be more wrong.  I'm sorry you feel the need to appeal for attention in such a somber moment.

And I'm sorry for the tragedy that occurred here, but let's get serious about this.

1) I think that the population of posters here don't speed through parking lots, but I bet a lot of us have kids. So, the "target market message" is: watch your kids.

2) What do you have control over? The other guy speeding? No. You DO HAVE CONTROL over your kid. Watch your kids.

 

 

[gsoda3 3,272]

we have a friend who saw it happen.  she said she saw the dad holding the child's hand, let go of it to reach for something (sunscreen?) and the next thing she saw was the child darting away from the dad.  unspeakable tragedy. 

[Sbbruin 21,865]

3 minutes ago, gsoda3 said:

we have a friend who saw it happen.  she said she saw the dad holding the child's hand, let go of it to reach for something (sunscreen?) and the next thing she saw was the child darting away from the dad.  unspeakable tragedy. 

That makes me nauseous just thinking about that.  Unspeakable indeed.

[Asithappens 974]

I know people who have lost a small child by backing over them in a car. I don't know how anyone could really get over that. 

[Sbbruin 21,865]

1 minute ago, Asithappens said:

I know people who have lost a small child by backing over them in a car. I don't know how anyone could really get over that. 

Same.  The dad never was the same.  Parents divorced a few years later and the dad just went downhill

[HouTex 1,887]

I know people who have lost a small child by backing over them in a car. I don't know how anyone could really get over that. 

When my kids (now post college adults) were toddlers to kindergarten age I would have nightmares of this happening. Sometimes it would take forever to leave my garage because I had to first triple check where my kids were. I was concerned they could run behind my car in the seconds it took for me to check around and then get in the car and back out. I can’t imagine anything worse for a parent.

[Jive Turkey 12,629]

sorry for your friend's loss.

towards the very top of things that piss me off is seeing somebody in a big ass truck or SUV in a crowded, tight parking lot, with one hand on the wheel and the other hand on the iPhone, yapping away and totally oblivious to what's going on around them.  it's maddening.  the impulse to jump on the phone as soon as you get in the car, before you've even exited your parking space.

[B00M 6,430]

43 minutes ago, gsoda3 said:

we have a friend who saw it happen.  she said she saw the dad holding the child's hand, let go of it to reach for something (sunscreen?) and the next thing she saw was the child darting away from the dad.  unspeakable tragedy. 

 

Fuck.

That settles it. I'll continue to carry my 22 month old twins through parking lots until they're 18. 

[luke duke 6,413]

Good psa.
But are there really events with lots of kids around in parking lots? 
Yeah, we should drive slower but where are the parents?

I have kids and as a parent this isn't an issue of speeders as much as negligent parents. 
Watch your kids. THAT'S the real message you need to convey.

Fuck you

https://cbsaustin.com/news/local/round-rock-family-speaks-mourns-for-daughter-after-fatal-auto-pedestrian-crash