Surly Dad Thread

[MNLonghornFUKM 8817]

Congrats! You’re so fucked, enjoy!

[hookem2010 2624]

Well, it went down about half an hour after that last post. Baby boy popped out on the 2nd contraction she pushed on, before the OB even made it into the room. It was insane and amazing. 

[Etexhorn13 3045]

4 hours ago, hookem2010 said:

Well, it went down about half an hour after that last post. Baby boy popped out on the 2nd contraction she pushed on, before the OB even made it into the room. It was insane and amazing. 

For your sake, I hope it happened while you were still upstream of everything before your caveman brain kicked in and said “sure, what the hell, I’ll take a look!” like I did as my son was starting to come out. 

[NotActuallyALonghorn 4976]

We've had three. The first was an emergency C-section after 27 hours of active labor. The second had to be pulled out with a suction cup thingy on his head after 20 hours of labor and three hours of pushing (9.5 pound baby probably didn't help on my wife's small frame). The third was a scheduled C-section because he was breeched. Took all of the doctor's weight to push over ten pounds of baby out of the wife's belly. Your wife/baby momma doesn't know how good she had it.

[atomheartbevo 89648]

So my 6 year-old, she's been listening to some of my music, and sometimes I have on some 70s AM radio playlist type of stuff.

Anyways, she loves the Eddie Rabbit "Driving My Life Away" song, but I really didn't think anything about it.

And then my wife asked me why our daughter is asking what a truck stop cutie is.

[hookem2010 2624]

First night in the house since leaving the hospital. I'm currently alternating between doing laps around the living room to stay awake and rocking him on the couch since he has no interest in sleeping in his bassinet tonight. Swaddle technique needs improvement and my already moderate-heavy caffeine intake will be increasing substantially. He is pretty damn adorable though.

[Dnaguy 11944]

3 hours ago, hookem2010 said:

First night in the house since leaving the hospital. I'm currently alternating between doing laps around the living room to stay awake and rocking him on the couch since he has no interest in sleeping in his bassinet tonight. Swaddle technique needs improvement and my already moderate-heavy caffeine intake will be increasing substantially. He is pretty damn adorable though.

Get something like this:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B013GYQVCW?ref_=cm_sw_r_cp_ud_dp_N7DW6WA0E2ZNJQZSQA2J

No technique needed.

Work smarter not harder.

Congrats on the new little one.

Buckle up.

[Bateshorn 9927]

Boy #2 graduated from HS this weekend. I’m 3 months away from being an empty nester. 

[Etexhorn13 3045]

32 minutes ago, Dnaguy said:

Get something like this:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B013GYQVCW?ref_=cm_sw_r_cp_ud_dp_N7DW6WA0E2ZNJQZSQA2J

No technique needed.

Work smarter not harder.

Congrats on the new little one.

Buckle up.

Yep…big time this^^^ google sleep sacks. We used Halo but there are less expensive options - I’d find one you can get a three pack in because they will spit up and/or have a blowout inevitably. If y’all don’t already have them, I’d also get sleep gowns and pajamas with the double zipper so you can just zip up from their leg. Those will make the middle of the night diaper changes way smoother. 

[NoName 16351]

2 hours ago, Etexhorn13 said:

Yep…big time this^^^ google sleep sacks. We used Halo but there are less expensive options - I’d find one you can get a three pack in because they will spit up and/or have a blowout inevitably. If y’all don’t already have them, I’d also get sleep gowns and pajamas with the double zipper so you can just zip up from their leg. Those will make the middle of the night diaper changes way smoother. 

can't agree enough on this.

we did the swaddle w/ muslin blanket for like a week and switched over 100% to the velcro ones like this:

https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B08X8WMVLD

but there are a million out there that are basically that exact one.

if you struggle with different ones, a ton of people we know personally recommend the Ollie swaddle, which is $$$$ from what I understand but gets incredible reviews

if you are a data/reading person this is far and away the best book i have come across: https://www.amazon.com/Cribsheet-Data-Driven-Relaxed-Parenting-Preschool/dp/0525559256

Emily Oster is excellent. Really hones in on what is important vs basically what is clickbait when it comes to studies/data on parenting and kids.

one other thing i would recommend is looking into baby carriers. doesn't matter what it is - wrap, baby bjorn, whatever - they are amazing and i don't understand why every single parent doesn't use them. baby will sleep in them (when ours was pissed, we would swaddle her and i would wear her and it worked like 95% of the time on getting her to sleep), you have hands free to do chores or whatever else - phone, kindle, book, etc and baby is generally happy in it

[hookem2010 2624]

We've got some version of the baby Bjorn and my wife just ordered a cloth swaddle-like carrier. I definitely going to invest in those velcro swaddles though.

[Celery Man 20934]

at 1 months I still use the shit out of the babybjorn. My wife some other version of the same thing, was absolutely worth it for us to each have our own one. Up until we lost our bigger dog recently it was nighttime routine for me to strap on Rory and have Kevin on one side and Sully on the other for a walk around the pond, and I wish I had a nickel for every new balance wearing dad walking by who said "looks like you've got your hands full!". I'll still wear Rory in the grocery store too if it's a quick one. If she wants to go on a walk she picks up her shoes and then goes over to where the bjorn is hanging and pulls on it.

Secret on that thing is to tighten up the bottom strap that goes around your waist.

If the little fucker is still getting an arm out using the velcro swaddles, go darkwing duck

 

 

Ok, and now a help request for myself - as mentioned, 13 month old. We're going to drive up and visit my sister in New Jersey (NYC new jersey) which is about an 8-9 hour drive from where we are in North Carolina. Wife doesn't want to rely too heavily on videos because car sickness or something - what should we do to try and keep kiddo entertained? I think we should probably split it into two drives and stop near DC, but either way - bunch of toys to cycle through, snacks, make sure the nap coincides with the drive?

[Goofyboy 3278]

We’ve reached the next stage: preteen braces. One week down - 22 months to go.

[Wiler77 1566]

Dropped the 10 and 7 year old boys off at camp yesterday.  2 weeks.

They're first timers, and we purposely didn't send them with friends, so I thought there would be a little nervousness.

Nope.  They flew out of the car and were on their way.  As my wife said, "the only tears were Mommy's".

[Fudbelty 2788]

9 yr girl and 6 yr old boy both went to soccer camp today. Proud dad moment when I found out the high school coaches actually noticed their skill and commented on it to mom. I know we’re years off and they may not even play in hs but still awesome.

[atomheartbevo 89648]

 

[Sandman 3403]

One of my twin daughters (no pics) moved out last year and tomorrow the other one is leaving. Neither will be far away but still, an empty nest. I got used to them being gone during the summers at their mom's house over the last 10-12 years, so I'm not too torn up about this. I will miss them but I'll enjoy the quiet time with the Mrs. as well. 

[hookem2010 2624]

The baby is 3 weeks old now. Fortunately, I'm not working right now because homeboy does not like to sleep from 1-6 AM. Otherwise, it's been pretty smooth sailing outside of the hospital mistakenly telling us that his newborn screen flagged a potentially serious genetic disease. Turns out they put in the wrong birthday and his labs were perfectly normal. That was a nice 18 hours of terror.

[MNLonghornFUKM 8817]

The baby is 3 weeks old now. Fortunately, I'm not working right now because homeboy does not like to sleep from 1-6 AM. Otherwise, it's been pretty smooth sailing outside of the hospital mistakenly telling us that his newborn screen flagged a potentially serious genetic disease. Turns out they put in the wrong birthday and his labs were perfectly normal. That was a nice 18 hours of terror.

Took them 18 hrs to discover your kid wasn’t born in 2012? Scary stuff regardless, sounds like you’re enjoying the graveyard shift!!

[Etexhorn13 3045]

Really hoping this first flight goes well with my 9 month old. The boy is ready. 

[tbone_ 14115]

It’ll be fine. Fuck the people that don’t understand kids.

[Etexhorn13 3045]

We had a blowout 5 min before we landed and got baby shit on my shorts so that was cool. Otherwise, that was a lot easier than I thought it would be. 

[hornian 5212]

Hard to get get action shots, but damn it feels good to recreate the crocodile mile for my kids with a couple of Costco finds. 
 

 

[hookemATL 11714]

12/10 dad rating. Outfuckingstanding

[BrazilHorn 6586]

My oldest (15) and his buddy just landed in Anchorage for a three week hiking/fishing/kayaking/orienteering camp. 
 

Feels weird having him so far away from the family. 

[Post Oak 20210]

Loved this.  Just a dad and his boy at a ballgame. 

 

[hornian 5212]

2 hours ago, Post Oak said:

Loved this.  Just a dad and his boy at a ballgame. 

 

I had a moment (off camera) like that at the Disch with my 3 year old and our next door neighbor’s kid this season at one of the mid week games (I think the Texas State game).
 

In the middle of an inning they were bored, so I took them to go run around while the neighbor kids dad stayed to watch the visitors bat.  We were playing in the grassy area behind the food trucks down the left field line and a ball lands and rolls to them. I told them “I think that’s a foul ball” and the neighbor kid picks it up. All the sudden a bunch of other kids come running over (from the actual stands I guess) and confirm it.
 

My 3 year old didn’t care, but the neighbor did (she was 6 so had a better grasp on how lucky it is to get a foul ball). She ran back to her dad and he was as excited as that dad in the video for her. 

[Rickylovesweed 14293]

On 6/24/2022 at 7:52 AM, Sandman said:

One of my twin daughters (no pics) moved out last year and tomorrow the other one is leaving. Neither will be far away but still, an empty nest. I got used to them being gone during the summers at their mom's house over the last 10-12 years, so I'm not too torn up about this. I will miss them but I'll enjoy the quiet time with the Mrs. as well. 

It takes some adjusting. When both my kids moved away for college it was a very odd experience for a few months.

I had always thought I would enjoy the quiet which I’ve grown to appreciate but it took some time to adjust. It’s hard to see your kids move away but I never expected I would miss the noise. 

[Celery Man 20934]

Man. The advice on how there are so many "last times" when they are little is so true. I watch the kiddo at night and bathe her/give her her last bottle/put her down. One big one was when we started doing her baths in the tub upstairs instead of in the sink. That was like a whole routine that we'd done her whole life and then it was very different and that little stage was over.

The past week, the wife has informed be that Rory is just about done with the breast milk and her night bottle is going to get smaller and smaller until it is nothing, and it's up to me to decide when to pull the plug entirely. This is the only bottle of breastmilk Rory is drinking at this point, and I decided that tonight was it. Bathed her, took her downstairs, and as soon as I picked up her sippy cup with regular milk instead of her regular bottle, she fucking lost it. Screech crying, no sound coming out crying, pushing away from me and flailing off the couch. Standing in the middle of the floor. Walking to the steps, collapsing on the first step crying. Kicking her legs crying. She wouldn't let me sing her to sleep at first - I had to stick her in her crib and let her flip out for a bit and then go in, hold her and sing until the big gasping cry breaths stopped. She's down. But goddammit, I gave her a bottle every night, what the fuck am I going to do. That was one of our things.

[Pig Bellmont 8712]

I’ve got no secret, just empathy that it’s hard. I have two kids - now 6 and 4. Each were different at that age. The first always had a hard time sleeping, like for 3 years. The second had colic and that’s a different thing, but was better at sleeping.  Good luck, Celery. All you can do is your best

[gyroprotagonist 2592]

kindof a cool moment.  boy is now 14 and for the first time we went to the gym and ran the court for a few games of pick up ball together.  i would still whoop his ass in 1v1 but as i am pushing 50 it is inevitable that he will take me down at some point.   but i am 6'7'' 230 and have a few inches and 100 lbs on him

these seem like the golden years right now.  Daughter at 12 is still in this great phase of telling us she loves us all the time and has not turned into a teen beast as of yet.  son is very chill and not really pushing boundaries.  The pandemic locking us in with each other has no doubt changed the dynamic some and i think we may be better for it.  brother and sister have become really close and even though there is the typical surface back and forth, they like hanging out together for the most part.

[Celery Man 20934]

Second night of no bottle went much smoother than the first - was stupid for me to try and sub out the sippy cup for the bottle, better to just jump to brushing her teeth and power through her confusion that something is missing from the routine.

The massive upside that didn't hit me until last night when I was going through my normal nightly routine is... holy fuck, as soon as my wife is done with the pumping I'm done with cleaning bottles and pump shit until the next one.

[hookemATL 11714]

We are almost clear of bottles for good. After that the diapers go. Happy she is growing up, sad to see it go by so fast but FUCK washing bottles and spending a fortune on diapers. 

[hookem2010 2624]

Little guy is almost to 8 weeks now. I did not think a task as simple as washing bottles could get so old, so fast. We're going through a bit of sleep regression already. After a short stretch of only 2 wake-ups per night, he has a single 3-4 hour initial sleep and then is up every 90 minutes or so after that. We've got a snoo, so I guess I'll try and let it soothe him back to sleep for 10-15 minutes before grabbing him. Thoughts or advice on lengthening those sleep segments?

Edited July 26, 2022 by hookem2010

[MNLonghornFUKM 8817]

Little guy is almost to 8 weeks now. I did not think a task as simple as washing bottles could get so old, so fast. We're going through a bit of sleep regression already. After a short stretch of only 2 wake-ups per night, he has a single 3-4 initial sleep and then is up every 90 minutes or so after that. We've got a snoo, so I guess I'll try and let it soothe him back to sleep for 10-15 minutes before grabbing him. Thoughts or advice on lengthening those sleep segments?

Thoughts and prayers. There’s Hope. My kids were the shit sleepers. Now at 7Yo and 4YO they sleep 10 hrs a night.

So yea. You’ll get there. I still get ptsd

[Etexhorn13 3045]

1 hour ago, hookem2010 said:

Little guy is almost to 8 weeks now. I did not think a task as simple as washing bottles could get so old, so fast. We're going through a bit of sleep regression already. After a short stretch of only 2 wake-ups per night, he has a single 3-4 hour initial sleep and then is up every 90 minutes or so after that. We've got a snoo, so I guess I'll try and let it soothe him back to sleep for 10-15 minutes before grabbing him. Thoughts or advice on lengthening those sleep segments?

Just grin and bear it. We did one of those sleep courses (Taking Cara Babies) that was pretty helpful for helping us develop a routine and some general tips and stuff, but YMMV. The sleep regressions we went through usually only lasted a few nights at most, but it sucks when they come around. We found that a hand on his chest for 10 min or so would sometimes be all it took to get him back to sleep, but if that didn’t work we’d just rock him back to sleep. He may just need a little milk to get him back. 
 

Those first 2.5-3 months seem like a blur, though, so good luck. 

[Goofyboy 3278]

Little guy is almost to 8 weeks now. I did not think a task as simple as washing bottles could get so old, so fast. We're going through a bit of sleep regression already. After a short stretch of only 2 wake-ups per night, he has a single 3-4 hour initial sleep and then is up every 90 minutes or so after that. We've got a snoo, so I guess I'll try and let it soothe him back to sleep for 10-15 minutes before grabbing him. Thoughts or advice on lengthening those sleep segments?

Does he eat over night? See if you can up his food a little. 8 weeks is sleep, eat, poop, repeat….

[SKJ 1311]

My son just got accepted to one of the best automotive tech schools in the area as a junior in high school.  He'll do half days at high school and half days at tech... he found a passion and he's going for it.  

I've already found him a job at a race shop when he graduates.  When he graduates,  He'll have something like 6 ASE certs.

In the area we live in,  if he graduates, he'll also get a free class in any other area the tech school offers....

He asked me,  dad,  you won't be disappointed if I don't go to college? 

I was like,  son,  you find what you want to do and I'll spend my time kicking doors open for you. 

Very proud.  He'll get a career basically for free,  have no college debt  and get to do what he loves.... 

It also doesn't hurt that his uncle builds and races cars as a hobby... the boy is set for life and I'm very thankful

[HornPhD 1368]

My 14-year old son and I had some great quality time in London last Friday (also on Wednesday when we went to the Churchill War Rooms). Hard to believe he’s going to be in high school next month. Yes, we looked like typical Americans with our sleeveless shirts; however, I was wearing button downs all week and this was our last full day. 

Changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace

 

Lunch at The Guinea

Abbey Road

 

 

[hookem2010 2624]

12 hours ago, Goofyboy said:

Does he eat over night? See if you can up his food a little. 8 weeks is sleep, eat, poop, repeat….

Yea, we try to give him a good feeding right before bed and at his first wake up. Last night was his worst night in a while though. Fortunately, neither of us are back at work yet so we can take the day to recover. But even so, that shit wears you out.

[choripan 790]

Our 4yo and 3yo fell asleep like this on Saturday night on the pull-out couch while watching movies. [Heart-Eye Emoji!]

 

BTW, hang tight for those of you that are having a tough time. Ours are 19 months apart, so we had 2-under-2 for a bit.

It may seem like it sucks now, but you'll probably reach a point down the road where you *wish* you could just wake up at 3am and rustle up a bottle to get them through the night and stuff like that. Or to have an hour or two just looking into your young baby's eyes, singing, shushing, while alternating between "damn, I love you so much" and "GO TO SLEEP MFER." Try to keep that perspective and realize that, like the cheesy song says, "you're gonna miss this." It's the advice we got many times over and it worked great for us.

[Celery Man 20934]

Fuck. You.

 

[tbone_ 14115]

That’s supposed to be done at 3am Christmas Eve.

[Celery Man 20934]

7 hours ago, tbone_ said:

That’s supposed to be done at 3am Christmas Eve.

Right?

The biggest fuck you is that by birthday present came significantly early, just minutes before this behemoth kitchen arrived

“I’ll get this thing put together downstairs first. Games probably haven’t even finished downloading yet.” Still haven’t played with it.

 

just like dad

Edited August 6, 2022 by Celery Man

[Snake Diggity 4621]

11 hours ago, Celery Man said:

Fuck. You.

 

Good job.  We bought one of the plastic ones about that size that came in 3 pieces.  So assembly was cake but I was still pissed about how much sq footage of our living room it took up.  But I have been shocked by how much mileage my 2 girls have gotten out of that damn thing.  They play with it everyday going on 5 years and probably have another 3-4 years left.  I’ve eaten an absolute fuckton of imaginary food in the last half decade.

Edited August 6, 2022 by Snake Diggity

[atomheartbevo 89648]

New season of Bluey in just two days.

[next2naus 439]

On 7/26/2022 at 8:48 AM, hookemATL said:

We are almost clear of bottles for good. After that the diapers go. Happy she is growing up, sad to see it go by so fast but FUCK washing bottles and spending a fortune on diapers. 

no you are not.....Sippy Cups and those thermos type cups, sure some parts are dishwasher safe but its never as easy as just reaching for an adult style cup. 

[hookemATL 11714]

3 hours ago, next2naus said:

no you are not.....Sippy Cups and those thermos type cups, sure some parts are dishwasher safe but its never as easy as just reaching for an adult style cup. 

It’s tradition in my family that once you hit the age of three you only drink out of the hollowed out skulls of the siblings you killed in mortal combat. So no need for sippy/thermos cups. 

[NotActuallyALonghorn 4976]

On 8/5/2022 at 11:48 PM, Celery Man said:

Fuck. You.

 

Next time ditch the manual screw drivers and just use a power drill. 

[next2naus 439]

2 hours ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

Next time ditch the manual screw drivers and just use a power drill. 

this is true, and use the drill and not an impact driver