Jump to content

Surly Dad Thread

BigDHornfan

By BigDHornfan
in Daily Texan

 Share

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 3.7k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Popular Posts

ocugolf
ocugolf

Many of you know my story. Lost a daughter to still birth at 8 months about 6 years ago. Well after 6 years of frustration, disappointment, hundreds of thousands of dollars in doctor bills for IUI, IV

closetojumping
closetojumping

My 8th grader got into St. John's! The counselor told me about it last night, early, because he was excited to get him. The boy has been diagnosed with autism and is enduring his third straight year i

scottsins
scottsins

Hi guys! Just posting from our hospital room. Not even sure what day it is, but I’m all up in this thread now, after the arrival of my first and last born spawn at the spry age of 49. Do I get an o

Posted Images

atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89626

Posted
Posted

My grandmother is pushing 90.  Last grandparent I have. My kids are almost 3 (daughter) and almost 6 (son), and so she’s always been really old and frail to them.   They see her once or twice a year for nearly two weeks (she lives with my dad)  but are on FaceTime a few times a week with her   

We got notice this morning that she probably won’t make it to Thanksgiving and maybe not even to November  

I’ve kinda been preparing for this for a year or two (she had a bad fall last year that scared me), but they have no clue since she’s always been frail in their eyes. I’ve had her in my life for over 40 years.  It sucks/hurts to lose that last close connection to the WWII generation, and to a big chunk of my childhood (spend quite a few summers on the farm she shared with my grandpa) but I’ve beem through this with three grandparents, and was around for two great-grandparents to pass away, and I know I will seriously grieve later on.

My daughter won’t fully understand, other than she won’t be around when we visit, and she won’t be on FaceTime anymore.

When we told my son she was very sick, he straight-up asked if she was dying, and we told him she was.  Lot of tears, and later on, questions.  We were honest with him.  

His first experience with death, but we are going to be visiting my grandma within a week or two, so the kids have at least one more chance to see her while she’s cognizant and able to talk to them.  We are going to FaceTime every day as well.

  He’s recently watched the Daniel Tiger episode on a goldfish dying (which was from the Mr. Rogers episode), and we plan on watching it and the Mr. Rogers episode of the same topic again.  It sounds silly, but he seems to get a lot from certain episodes from those two shows (going to the doctor, dentist, etc.) that he can directly apply. 

Any words of advice for that age?

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Jkwellborn

Jkwellborn 6688

Posted
Posted

Atb, just sit him down and explain it to him. My granddad died when my little girl was about 4. We answered her questions simply. She seemed to have a decent grasp on it, as much as a child that young could. She wasn’t around him a lot.

My grandmother passed away last year. I was really close to her. My little girl, 7 then, knew I was upset and would come hug me and tell me it was going to be alright.

Kids are gonna take it different. I think it depends on how close y’all are to them.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Damor

Damor 1236

Posted
Posted

We're all different in how we respond, so it's totally to be expected that kids will be too.  That does make it hard to give advice, though.

This book was very helpful for our then-5yo when my mom died.  I think I mentioned it once on the old scattergories site.  Be advised it has religious themes if that's not where you are.
51QW1CJMNTL._SX468_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

Kids do tend to do better when it's expected and they can ask question beforehand, so you're on on the right track.  That made a big difference for our son (well, that and my wife was a child life specialist in a previous career), but even then, the road can get rocky.  Just be there as best you can.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
PvilleStang

PvilleStang 2875

Posted
Posted

Shit, shes been cluster feeding on Mrs. PVS for the last few nights, not sleeping more than two hours at a time. Then that happened out of nowhere.

We just drove up to Dallas with her, was a nightmare thanks in part to Bee Cave Rd. being shut down. Took almost 2 extra hours to get here.

Sent from my SM-G950U using Tapatalk

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Goofyboy

Goofyboy 3269

Posted
Posted

Need some advice:

My kids teacher told me yesterday that my son and one other 2nd grader in her class (Special Education for behavioral issues) were purposely left out of the COGAT testing that all of the other second graders completed, would you consider that discrimination?

My kids teacher said she had to make it an issue for them to be tested and they both were yesterday, which is still in the testing window. I’m pissed, but I’m not sure what recourse I should take. I don’t want this happening to another kid that’s in a class like this. My kid is one of the smartest 2nd graders in the whole school (tests in the 99th % in almost all areas) so cognitive ability is not his issue, and even if it was, that’s no reason to leave him out.

Can I sue for discrimination? Seems extreme and likely hard to prove.
Should I just complain to the principal or go higher?

Link to comment
Share on other sites
bernorange

bernorange 8359

Posted
Posted

I'm not sure I understood the situation. 

You have a 2nd grader in a special class for kids with behavioral issues.  The special class only has two kids in it that are 2nd graders?  What grade level are the rest of the students?

The school was conducting a test for all 2nd graders and the two 2nd graders in the special class did not participate.  What does "My kids teacher said she had to make it an issue for them to be tested and they both were yesterday" mean?  I am trying to parse that sentence, but I'm really not sure what you are communicating here.  The teacher purposefully excluded the 2nd graders in her class, or the teacher had to jump through some hoops to get the 2nd graders in her class eligible to participate in the testing?

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Goofyboy

Goofyboy 3269

Posted
Posted

Sorry for the confusion:

The counselor left out my son and another 2nd grade student from testing. My sons teacher, acting as an advocate for the two students, had the counselor test them yesterday.

This is a class for kids with behavioral and emotional issues that a general education teacher isn’t equipped to handle. There are 9 kids, three teachers and are 1st through 5th grade. My son should be finishing the program in the next few months. The class falls under the special education umbrella.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
CooterBrown

CooterBrown 18003

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, Modessit said:

Hope nobody at school found out. Looks like a sure visit from the cops and CPS.

Nope. She said she saw it right away and didn't even remove it from her lunch box. We keep all the kid drinks for lunches in one fridge door so I just grabbed a drink without paying much attention.  That beer had been put there with all the flavored water. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
tbone_

tbone_ 14109

Posted
Posted

Sounds to me like the kind of routine dumb mistake made by schools everywhere. And sounds like the teacher was watching out for your kiddo and fixed the mistake.

 

I wouldn’t sue. I would just get to know the counselor and teacher. Be as involved and engaged as possible. Be the polite squeaky wheel so it will be hard for them to mistakenly overlook your kids in the future. You gotta stay on the school teachers/admin. But be polite about it. It will go a long way.

 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites
bernorange

bernorange 8359

Posted
Posted

So, if I'm understanding correctly, your son and the other student were excluded from the test with the rest of the 2nd grade, but their teacher did ensure that they got tested.

You are questioning the original decision to omit them from the testing with the rest of the school.

Was it oversight (an administrative fuckup)?

Was it deliberate/considered (to avoid potential behavioral disruptions for the rest of the student body presumably)?

Was it discrimination (special ed kids second class) or nefarious (schools funding can be impacted by student performance on standardized testing)?

I would consider the first two questions before looking to the last one.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Modessit

Modessit 5598

Posted
Posted
And that’s why I asked. Thank you for the responses. I’m usually pretty level headed, but when it comes to schools and my kid, our experiences have not been exactly great. We got really lucky with this teacher. She’s been amazing.

My wife is a special ed teacher. I'll ask her about this tonight to see if she can explain why they might have been omitted originally. Then you can decide how to respond knowing the school's side if it.

 

I know that some kids under the special ed umbrella are exempt from certain tests the "regular" kids have to take and it's possible that kids that are in special ed programs for reasons other than cognitive ability are just automatically lumped in with the others.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Rip76

Rip76 4924

Posted
Posted (edited)

Had not checked into this thread yet.  This is a good one.  

Some of you have known me since Hornfans.  Many things going on these days. 

Recently divorced, with an Autistic son.  

Alex just started 5th grade at a new school.  (5th freaking grade, I posted pics of him on Hornfans when he was born).  He is doing well, but we are still dealing with his hyperactivity, and ability to focus.  If he would just slow down mentally, I believe he could focus and really take off.  (Still a bit weary of the medication route).

His mother is really good with him, and we are still looking at what days he will stay with me.  (I travel every other week so I'm thinking when I'm in town, maybe Tues-Thurs and when I'm out of town, have him that weekend.)

So many unknowns lie ahead.   

Just a couple of pics of Alex these days.

41298091_2141913312495312_10318150834008

 

41286217_2141964672490176_27211622965827

Edited by Rip76
  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites
hornian

hornian 5210

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, Rip76 said:

Had not checked into this thread yet.  This is a good one.  

Some of you have known me since Hornfans.  Many things going on these days. 

Recently divorced, with an Autistic son.  

Alex just started 5th grade at a new school.  (5th freaking grade, I posted pics of him on Hornfans when he was born).  He is doing well, but we are still dealing with his hyperactivity, and ability to focus.  If he would just slow down mentally, I believe he could focus and really take off.  (Still a bit weary of the medication route).

His mother is really good with him, and we are still looking at what days he will stay with me.  (I travel every other week so I'm thinking when I'm in town, maybe Tues-Thurs and when I'm out of town, have him that weekend.)

So many unknowns lie ahead.   

Just a couple of pics of Alex these days.

41298091_2141913312495312_10318150834008

 

41286217_2141964672490176_27211622965827

Awesome. My sister is a BCBA, if you ever need someone to work with send me a PM and I can send you her info. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Rip76

Rip76 4924

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, hornian said:

Yes, she works in Austin. She actually works more with fairly uncommunicative kids - but she certainly has recommendations if needed. 

Ok great.

I appreciate that for sure.  He’s getting so much better at communication, but we’re not there yet.

Where we need to be.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
hornian

hornian 5210

Posted
Posted

Went to hospital last night becaus wife (39 weeks) thought it was happening. Got there around 6:30, they did the tests and told us to go home. 

Anout 2 am wife wakes me up - baby was actually coming this time got admitted st 3:00 a.m. a five labor has to started, but #2 should be here today. 

We waited to find out gender, so gonna be in for a surprise here shortly. 

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

Posted
Posted

Congrats to you and best of luck today.  We're heading up to the sonogram for 12/13-week limb checkup and all that.  We also have the option to find out sex/gender today, I'm leaving it to my wife to decide.  Positive vibes out there for all us dads this morning...

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Schulz2.0

Schulz2.0 28951

Posted
Posted
On 9/24/2018 at 5:45 AM, MNLonghornFUKM said:

that hair tho. Thats a much more heartwarming post than what I was about to say...we're at the 4 month sleep regression and it sucks.  at least he goes back to bed every time but awake and kicking every 2 hours is a mf'er

My kid had a week of 1 hour to 1 1/2 hours of sleep between waking up every night. It just stopped a couple days ago. I’m hoping that was his 4 month sleep regression happening a couple weeks early and we’re not in for more shortly.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
kmac30

kmac30 416

Posted
Posted

My wife’s niece is in town. She’s 1 and has usually been standoffish towards me. Today she let me hold her and play with her. My kids are 6 and 5 (twins). Originally we said we were done when I turned 40. Chance of twins again is higher than normal. I could handle one more but no way could I handle twins again. SIL is preggo and due in April. She’ll be 40. My wife is 36.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
 Share
Go to topic listing


Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business and Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Subscribe!... Donate!... Advertise... COOKIE MONSTER!

×
×
  • Create New...