Surly Dad Thread

[Celery Man 20966]

1 hour ago, Jerry Callo said:

When my kids were babies, we didn't any fancy things like that.  On more than one occasion, I'd put the kid in the carrier and put the carrier on top of the washing machine.

this is like that, but you've got a guy that throws increasingly heavier tennis balls into the machine as the baby continues to cry

[BabaYaga 15301]

1 hour ago, South Austin said:

 

My fiance was between you guys.  Wait . . . that came out wrong.

 

No it didn't

[Jkwellborn 6708]

Man, kids are mean.  I’ve been coaching ours since they could speak that they can’t be bystanders when they see bullying, they’ve got a responsibility to fight it, even if it’s not happening to them.  

No doubt. Kids are fucking assholes.

[next2naus 439]

50 minutes ago, BabaYaga said:

No it didn't

Everyone came just fine, wait,wut?

[Celery Man 20966]

 

[YGIFS 19452]

On 3/8/2024 at 11:21 AM, Jerry Callo said:

When my kids were babies, we didn't any fancy things like that.  On more than one occasion, I'd put the kid in the carrier and put the carrier on top of the washing machine.

Then your wife got stuck inside said washing machine and that's how you got baby #2?  

[NoName 16354]

On 3/8/2024 at 10:54 AM, Celery Man said:

I was trying to remember how expensive this thing was and so I looked it up - like 1600, worth it. Curious how much I get for it after we move kid 2 to the crib and a disconnect my balls.

just want to point out you can get them used and the price on used ones has plummeted over the last 2 years. seen it for <$600 locally, which is a screaming deal

if folks end up getting them i'm sure that Celery or I would happily share some tips. it really is an incredible device.

4 mo is avg over 11 solid hours of sleep per night at this point, and would sleep longer if he didn't have to get up for daycare. genuinely sleeps deeper/longer than our 2 y/o

Edited March 15 by NoName

[Celery Man 20966]

I think this is the metric that most correlates to my quality of life. Longest period of continuous night sleep -

 

pretty good for a 3 month old. That short line is the day when I was complaining, he definitely had a little cold or something going on.

[Al_4_ISU 12464]

9 minutes ago, Celery Man said:

I think this is the metric that most correlates to my quality of life. Longest period of continuous night sleep -

 

pretty good for a 3 month old. That short line is the day when I was complaining, he definitely had a little cold or something going on.

My daughter is 7 months and I don't know if it's teething related, or a sleep regression, but the last two weeks I've gotten maybe two full nights of sleep.  She wakes up screaming at least once a night, and a lot of nights 2-3 times.  She calms down immediately when she's held, but it takes about a minimum of 30 minutes just holding her to guarantee she won't wake up in a rage the second she hits the crib.  This is all from a kid that slept straight through the night from birth until recently.

And as soon as she starts thrashing, her Owlet has a hard time getting readings and starts into it's "Hush Little Baby" alarm tone.  That song is going to bring me to break some shit at some point.

[Etexhorn13 3051]

We’ve got pee and poop in the potty! We learned pretty quickly yesterday to roll the rug up, but doing very well today. 

[Etexhorn13 3051]

After a long couple days of potty training, we’ve had some good success and plenty of accidents… we are doing the three day deal starting with no pants, then adding shirts, then finally adding underwear and shirts tomorrow. It’s a slog but at the very least we seem to have perfected the boy’s hookem. Mom went to Baylor and hates that he much prefers saying “Go Horns!!!” 😁

[ocugolf 1214]

Well IVF worked! Since our previous disaster and our age, we will be considered high risk. Lots of blood work and ultrasounds coming up. Stress level has risen considerably. Google is the worst invention of all time. Way too much information at the tip of my fingers. Lol. Due date is going to be right around the day we lost our first daughter. We are excited and cautiously optimistic. All the positive vibes would be appreciated. Thanks for all the support and kind words over the years! 

[Dish Boggett 67]

5 hours ago, ocugolf said:

Well IVF worked! Since our previous disaster and our age, we will be considered high risk. Lots of blood work and ultrasounds coming up. Stress level has risen considerably. Google is the worst invention of all time. Way too much information at the tip of my fingers. Lol. Due date is going to be right around the day we lost our first daughter. We are excited and cautiously optimistic. All the positive vibes would be appreciated. Thanks for all the support and kind words over the years! 

Awesome news OCU, sending out positive vibes wishing you two the best.    Stay positive for her.  You got this. 

Edited March 18 by Dish Boggett

[Celery Man 20966]

good shit all around

[orange dream 1254]

On 3/8/2024 at 10:54 AM, Celery Man said:

I was trying to remember how expensive this thing was and so I looked it up - like 1600, worth it. Curious how much I get for it after we move kid 2 to the crib and a disconnect my balls.

Story time...

First kids were born in 2000 and 2002, both were poor sleepers early on.  Fast forward 11 years and our bonus baby was born in 2013 when we were in our 40s.

A friend told us about the Fisher Price Rock 'n Play Sleeper (caveman version of the device above, that ultimately was recalled over safety concerns).

The bonus baby slept great from the jump.  Only problem was, because he was in the exact same position all night, every night he ended up with a flat back of his dome.  Not a problem a little cranial helmet for a few weeks couldn't overcome.

That boy now has the most perfectly shaped head in North Texas.  Would I do the exact same thing again so my old ass could get some much-needed sleep to deal with teenagers and infants at the same time...

 

[McFly 606]

Glad it all turned out ok but we had one of those and they were not supposed to sleep long in there. 

We recently started using a Yoto player at night for ours (3,5) and it has worked wonders. Highly recommend. 

[Celery Man 20966]

2 hours ago, McFly said:

Glad it all turned out ok but we had one of those and they were not supposed to sleep long in there. 

We recently started using a Yoto player at night for ours (3,5) and it has worked wonders. Highly recommend. 

oh yeah we have a tonie box and it's such a fucking obvious racket, but also.... meh. Part of the nighttime ritual is lifting Rory up to pick her character from the shelf. Read her a couple of books, tuck her in, she puts the pirate or elsa or stitch or whoever it is on the box and peace i'm audi

[hookem2010 2624]

This pregnancy has been an absolute ass-kicking for the wife (anybody else's 2nd seem so much harder than the 1st?), and we had a brief scare earlier this week, but the 12-week US looked great! Now that the baby looks like something and we will know the sex soon, shit is starting to feel real again.

[locodos 5387]

32 minutes ago, hookem2010 said:

This pregnancy has been an absolute ass-kicking for the wife (anybody else's 2nd seem so much harder than the 1st?), and we had a brief scare earlier this week, but the 12-week US looked great! Now that the baby looks like something and we will know the sex soon, shit is starting to feel real again.

No, but let me hit you with something you know, but don't understand.   At some point with kid two, you are going to be thinking about how much extra work your doing while your partner is also feeling that they are doing a lot more work too.  You're both right.

Well guess what?  You have twice the kids and that means twice the work for a while.

And maybe you already internalized this, but my wife and I, only internalized this in about month 2.  Luckily my daughter slept a lot and was generally much easier.  I hope your second is too.

 

My best Dad pro tip:  Whatever your partner asks you to do, do it happily, and don't bitch even if it was tough or really reallly OU level sucked.  Embrace the challenge and take it on with a smile, and perhaps a little shit, on your face.  Don't be a blackhole of bitchassedness, everyone knows it's tough and you'll just set a shitty tone for everyone.

Edited March 21 by locodos

[Jerry Callo 8704]

2 hours ago, locodos said:

You have twice the kids and that means twice the work for a while.

With two under two it seemed exponentially more difficult.

[Dish Boggett 67]

3 hours ago, locodos said:

My best Dad pro tip:  Whatever your partner asks you to do, do it happily, and don't bitch even if it was tough or really reallly OU level sucked.  Embrace the challenge and take it on with a smile, and perhaps a little shit, on your face.  Don't be a blackhole of bitchassedness, everyone knows it's tough and you'll just set a shitty tone for everyone.

Listen to this man

[BurntOrange&White 39934]

I didn't know this thread exist and now that my wife and I are expecting our first kid in July I'll be here for advice and such. We are having a baby boy and can't be more excited after some fertility problems for two years and a miscarriage following the fetility issues. 

[YGIFS 19452]

Congrats man!  We were in a similar situation.  D&C and ensuing fertility issues.  As you can tell this thread is binary.  Either we're all experts or scared shitless.  Depending on the amount of sleep we got.  Gonna reiterate what I tell every new dad.  You're gonna get nothing but advice and worthless crap that just takes up space in your house.  That's all anybody can do for you, they mean well.  But in the end, it's all bullshit from words to wisdom to stuff.  

Having said that, I carry around pieces of information with me always and offer them to any new parent who'll listen.

-The old adage couldn't be more true.  The Days are Long, and the Years are Short.  

-Learn to swaddle.  Swaddle like the wind!  Learn to do it upside down, in the dark, left-handed, half-drunk, on no sleep while the mommy is getting much needed rest.  You'll three be happy when you change the baby, feed it, and get it back to sleep so mommy can get  some sleep.  But they don't go over swaddling in the prenatal courses.  You see the blanket, you know the blanket, you feel the blanket.  But fucking game the shit outta that with a doll or a cat or something.  If you can swaddle that little guy quietly in any condition or lighting with one hand tied behind your back and keep him quiet and back to sleep without a sound...................you're a fucking jukebox hero.  You'll pick up everything else along the way.  Practice now.  And practice drunk.  

[BurntOrange&White 39934]

13 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

Congrats man!  We were in a similar situation.  D&C and ensuing fertility issues.  As you can tell this thread is binary.  Either we're all experts or scared shitless.  Depending on the amount of sleep we got.  Gonna reiterate what I tell every new dad.  You're gonna get nothing but advice and worthless crap that just takes up space in your house.  That's all anybody can do for you, they mean well.  But in the end, it's all bullshit from words to wisdom to stuff.  

Having said that, I carry around pieces of information with me always and offer them to any new parent who'll listen.

-The old adage couldn't be more true.  The Days are Long, and the Years are Short.  

-Learn to swaddle.  Swaddle like the wind!  Learn to do it upside down, in the dark, left-handed, half-drunk, on no sleep while the mommy is getting much needed rest.  You'll three be happy when you change the baby, feed it, and get it back to sleep so mommy can get  some sleep.  But they don't go over swaddling in the prenatal courses.  You see the blanket, you know the blanket, you feel the blanket.  But fucking game the shit outta that with a doll or a cat or something.  If you can swaddle that little guy quietly in any condition or lighting with one hand tied behind your back and keep him quiet and back to sleep without a sound...................you're a fucking jukebox hero.  You'll pick up everything else along the way.  Practice now.  And practice drunk.  

Thanks for the words...we got some of these gifted to us already by some friends who swear by them:

 

We're still debating on this item for our registry:

 

Edited March 21 by BurntOrange&White

[YGIFS 19452]

Then quit dicking around posting on here and get to practicing.  Everything else makes sense from feeding to diapers to rocking them to sleep.  But dammit if it didn't take me weeks to learn to swaddle properly.  It's not hard logistically if you're well-rested, it's broad fucking daylight and your wife is in a pleasant mood.  It's those 3am scenarios where she needs sleep, you don't know what fucking planet you're on, you gotta be quiet, you can't fumble around and grunt, it's pitch black because lightbulbs bother baby as they are not accustomed to them, and oh yeah...if you swaddle baby wrong and he screams/cries and wakes up mommy and she freaks out from being suddenly waken from a deep slumber, you freak the fuck out and fumble the baby...it's a Class C felony.   But hey, other than that........no pressure brutha.  I mean do the infant CPR and prenatal classes 'n shit.............but sleep is so fucking key.  You'll do your part.  Practice.  You got this. . All else is commentary.  

[EE2B 1565]

We bought the Owlet for our second kid and used for about a week. The first time it went off in the middle of the night when the sock came off, we stopped using it. If they have changed the way the sock fits, it might be worth it. Otherwise, it’s going to cause you to have a heart attack the first time it comes off their foot in the middle of the night. 

[InkaUtexas 25981]

6 hours ago, hookem2010 said:

This pregnancy has been an absolute ass-kicking for the wife (anybody else's 2nd seem so much harder than the 1st?), and we had a brief scare earlier this week, but the 12-week US looked great! Now that the baby looks like something and we will know the sex soon, shit is starting to feel real again.

Yep, ex's second was a beating. She was in labor for about 72 hours and almost bled out. Rough times, and took time to recover. So hang in there and get ready for whatever is needed as others have. Just remember the blessing to have a second.

[Foosters 17858]

15 minutes ago, EE2B said:

We bought the Owlet for our second kid and used for about a week. The first time it went off in the middle of the night when the sock came off, we stopped using it. If they have changed the way the sock fits, it might be worth it. Otherwise, it’s going to cause you to have a heart attack the first time it comes off their foot in the middle of the night. 

same experience with us

[Da Fino 2783]

The swaddle game has changed @YGIFS. The new ones are very easy. I wouldn't bother with the socks @BurntOrange&White. Everyone I know that tried them stopped using them pretty quick. 

[BurntOrange&White 39934]

https://www.amazon.com/Nanit-Smart-Baby-Monitor-Stand/dp/B0B9ZVST99?ref_=ast_sto_dp&th=1&psc=1

 

What are yall's thoughts on these instead of the sock?

[Celery Man 20966]

I have the Nanit as a monitor. It seems fairly good. What do I have going on now…..

Ez is on my legs getting fed right now. I love the split screen. I didn’t use the sensor thing, and I think you can buy the monitor without it. I had the same experience as everyone else with the owlet sock, but I do know people who use it. I’m curious if the Nanit thing works in a Snoo. I haven’t been particularly worried about night breath tracking.

 

 You may like those swaddles. I still swear by the double batwing, and my wife makes me swaddle every nap I’m available for because he sleeps longer and quieter when I bundle that fucker up

Spoiler

My latest iteration of the swaddle, I fold up the bottom of both blankets simultaneously and then wrap. I’ve also switched to the hospital striped blankets for the bottom layer because they are huge. I can fold the first side all the way under and around the other side. He’s down 30 seconds after I get to the Snoo.

 

Oh btw that thing he’s in is called a dock a tot, they’re outrageously expensive for what they are and completely worth it. If I had thought more about it I would have bought a second before Ez was born.

Edited March 22 by Celery Man

[hookem2010 2624]

#2 is going to be another boy! Due 28 months after his big brother.

[Daddy Fat Sax 53]

On 3/8/2024 at 11:36 AM, closetojumping said:

My 8th grader got into St. John's! The counselor told me about it last night, early, because he was excited to get him. The boy has been diagnosed with autism and is enduring his third straight year in public junior high of being called the "school retard" and being fucked with in general. He's had his lunch kit and drinking bottle, new versions each time, stolen from him 3 times in the past week. It's been hard for a kid who really loves school and learning but has no idea how to handle many human interactions. Anyway, he tested off the charts for private school and his grades are absurd, so he somehow overcame the interviewing process and got his #1 pick. My wife cried with happiness and relief. 

Congrats. Don't know Houston but sounds like a good fit. Middle school is tough on spectrum kids. My son was going through lunch money quickly. We figured out kids were making him buy them snacks. He ended up becoming the school mascot so he would sit with the cheerleaders. Sounds great to normies but they were just the kids that were nice to him. 

Fortunately it seems like high school has gotten a little better. I think bully kids have moved on and matured slightly. He's generally well liked but he definitely has trouble making more than surface connections. 

Ok venting done. All that is to say that the battles change and continue, but fortunately middle school appears to be the worst. You and your wife seem to be on the right track.  Good luck. 

[BurntOrange&White 39934]

I think we decided not to go the smart baby monitor route. Instead we are going with the Eufy Spaceview Pro and will get a well reviewed stand similar to the Nanit Pro stand so that way we can move it from our bedroom to the nursery once we make that transition. We will be able to add another camera to this monitor as well if we have another kid. 

 

To get the most out of the breathing monitors for Nanit you need to buy their swaddles and wraps.

The Owlet as mentioned here has issues with the sock being kicked off.

Edited March 26 by BurntOrange&White

[hookem2010 2624]

Anyone else with 2 boys about 2 years apart? I've got to imagine that the time from the little one becoming mobile to the older one starting school is going to an absolute whirlwind. I wouldn't describe the big boy as a chill dude, so I think we'll be holding on for dear life for a while.

[NoName 16354]

On 3/21/2024 at 12:39 PM, BurntOrange&amp;White said:

Thanks for the words...we got some of these gifted to us already by some friends who swear by them:

 

We're still debating on this item for our registry:

 

i use those swaddles, there are a million of them now and the brand doesn't really matter.  but what 100% does matter is that you get the style like that one above with the 2 ears on it. NOT the style where it's one piece.

you want this style, and i like the comfy cub ones:

NOT THIS STYLE:

when you wash/dry them it curls up and makes it much less useful.

-

re: owlet - we got a great deal on one when kid #1 was born and little, wife used it a good bit. we have used it 0 times in 5 months with kid #2. its a nice thing to have but it's annoying as hell to actually use on a day to day basis.

-

re: monitor - i very strongly recommend the eufy spaceview pro. it uses basically the same cam and doesn't require a network which is a live saver. it also has a large battery on the monitor and you can turn it off while still having the sound on. if you need something network connected just get a cheap cam and use that. but not having to have wifi makes life SO MUCH EASIER when you are anywhere that isn't home - and even at home you don't have to worry about if the network goes down for a few minutes, etc. you can add a second cam to the setup.

https://www.amazon.com/eufy-Security-BabyCare-SpaceView-Ultra-Long/dp/B08G8MBWZ8

-

other specific things/recs you didn't ask for but that i am going to recommend anyway

these specific muslin burp cloths - buy a million of them. you can't have enough. don't get distracted by the copper pearl ones or the thick ones or those that look good. these are the shit, these specific comfy cub ones.

https://www.amazon.com/Muslin-Burp-Cloths-Baby-Boy-Girl-Burping/dp/B08CBJ2SSQ/

the ubbi steel diaper pail. don't use the ones that require a specific brand of bags for it. this uses kitchen trash bags. shit is gonna smell no matter what. put it in a dog pop bag, then drop it in here and it makes a huge difference.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00821FLT4/

you will get a ton of recommendations on baby bottles: we tried a bunch and ended up with the boon nursh system. it's all interchangeable, you have different sized nipples, you can use sippy cup lids, they have a straw conversion top lid - you can buy individual pieces too. very highly recommend them

if you end up using formula, just buy one of the formula mixing pitchers, there are a bunch of them that are all basically the same. makes life SO EASY. also if end up on formula, buy from costco/sams. the dollar difference per OZ is shocking and you will pay for the costco membership out of your formula savings alone in the first 30 days of having it.

Spoiler

 

final recommendation: buy the longhorn wubbanub now so you have it when you go to the hospital lol

https://www.amazon.com/WubbaNub-W32331-Longhorn-Bull-Pacifier/dp/B0028J2EQY

 

[hornian 5219]

6 minutes ago, hookem2010 said:

Anyone else with 2 boys about 2 years apart? I've got to imagine that the time from the little one becoming mobile to the older one starting school is going to an absolute whirlwind. I wouldn't describe the big boy as a chill dude, so I think we'll be holding on for dear life for a while.

I've got 3 girls, 3 years apart each. My oldest is now 8 (2nd grade), middle 5 (pre-K), youngest 2.

Luckily we are out of diapers completely (except pull ups at night for the 2 year old), but right now with music, sports, school, kids birthdays on the weekends, etc. it's non stop.

 

[locodos 5387]

5 minutes ago, hornian said:

I've got 3 girls, 3 years apart each. My oldest is now 8 (2nd grade), middle 5 (pre-K), youngest 2.

Luckily we are out of diapers completely (except pull ups at night for the 2 year old), but right now with music, sports, school, kids birthdays on the weekends, etc. it's non stop.

 

3?  Can't play man, gotta play zone

[BurntOrange&White 39934]

38 minutes ago, NoName said:

i use those swaddles, there are a million of them now and the brand doesn't really matter.  but what 100% does matter is that you get the style like that one above with the 2 ears on it. NOT the style where it's one piece.

you want this style, and i like the comfy cub ones:

NOT THIS STYLE:

when you wash/dry them it curls up and makes it much less useful.

-

re: owlet - we got a great deal on one when kid #1 was born and little, wife used it a good bit. we have used it 0 times in 5 months with kid #2. its a nice thing to have but it's annoying as hell to actually use on a day to day basis.

-

re: monitor - i very strongly recommend the eufy spaceview pro. it uses basically the same cam and doesn't require a network which is a live saver. it also has a large battery on the monitor and you can turn it off while still having the sound on. if you need something network connected just get a cheap cam and use that. but not having to have wifi makes life SO MUCH EASIER when you are anywhere that isn't home - and even at home you don't have to worry about if the network goes down for a few minutes, etc. you can add a second cam to the setup.

https://www.amazon.com/eufy-Security-BabyCare-SpaceView-Ultra-Long/dp/B08G8MBWZ8

-

other specific things/recs you didn't ask for but that i am going to recommend anyway

these specific muslin burp cloths - buy a million of them. you can't have enough. don't get distracted by the copper pearl ones or the thick ones or those that look good. these are the shit, these specific comfy cub ones.

https://www.amazon.com/Muslin-Burp-Cloths-Baby-Boy-Girl-Burping/dp/B08CBJ2SSQ/

the ubbi steel diaper pail. don't use the ones that require a specific brand of bags for it. this uses kitchen trash bags. shit is gonna smell no matter what. put it in a dog pop bag, then drop it in here and it makes a huge difference.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00821FLT4/

you will get a ton of recommendations on baby bottles: we tried a bunch and ended up with the boon nursh system. it's all interchangeable, you have different sized nipples, you can use sippy cup lids, they have a straw conversion top lid - you can buy individual pieces too. very highly recommend them

if you end up using formula, just buy one of the formula mixing pitchers, there are a bunch of them that are all basically the same. makes life SO EASY. also if end up on formula, buy from costco/sams. the dollar difference per OZ is shocking and you will pay for the costco membership out of your formula savings alone in the first 30 days of having it.

  Reveal hidden contents

 

final recommendation: buy the longhorn wubbanub now so you have it when you go to the hospital lol

https://www.amazon.com/WubbaNub-W32331-Longhorn-Bull-Pacifier/dp/B0028J2EQY

 

Yeah we're definitely going Spaceview Pro if you see my reasoning on a later post and we have this as a "must have" on our registry for travel Travel Monitor

I love that pacifier. I'll be buying that myself! We also plan to get this for him: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09CX41F9R?psc=1&tag=blvisitor-20&th=1
 

We had that trash can you posted on the registry already. All of our friends swear by it and agree on "fuck the proprietary trash bag style." 

If we are going to have to do formula I think we decided on this but we have also heard good things about the Kirkland's pro care.

 

Edited March 26 by BurntOrange&White

[Celery Man 20966]

on the diaper pale thing - i know people like the one linked above and I wish we had gotten that one instead of a... whatever it is we have, one of those fuckers with the proprietary bags. With kid #1, the changing table was in her bedroom, which is on the second floor. I emptied the diaper genie every day to make it not retchworthy. Kid 2, we have a little table attachment set up on the pack and play that we keep set up downstairs (in addition to the one on his dresser upstairs) and I change 95% of his diapers downstairs. Kitchen trash is right there and I chuck them in there - typing that, maybe I'd be grossed out if it was an under counter thing, but it's just on the periphery of the kitchen in an open 1st floor. I empty that trash every day and the diaper genie doesn't get used much this time around. Much prefer it. My convoluted advice summed up here really is - make a changing station near where the action in your house is. And buy wipes in bulk.

For bottles, I feel like the kid kinda chose the bottle, although we settled on the same bottles for kid 2 so maybe we're influencing that more than we think. These are what we wound up with and they're a little bit of a pain (6 parts counting the lid - base, gasket, body, top, nipple, lid) but I'm like Forrest Gump cleaning his rifle with these - 

 

what I wish for you is that you find the bottle that works for you well without buying every goddamn bottle on the market

Look at this 3 month old. He was holding his head up almost immediately and desperately wants to stand 

Edited March 26 by Celery Man

[NoName 16354]

10 minutes ago, BurntOrange&amp;White said:

Yeah we're definitely going Spaceview Pro if you see my reasoning on a later post. 

I love that pacifier. I'll be buying that myself! We also plan to get this for him: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09CX41F9R?psc=1&tag=blvisitor-20&th=1
 

We had that trash can you posted on the registry already. All of our friends swear by it and agree on "fuck the proprietary trash bag style." 

If we are going to have to do formula I think we decided on this but we have also heard good things about the Kirkland's pro care.

 

going to spoiler this, but realize none of this is judgemental just trying to be educational
 

Spoiler

wirecutter goes into it but basically all formula in the usa is from 1 of 4 companies

https://www.nytimes.com/wirecutter/reviews/best-baby-formula/

Quote

Four companies manufacture the vast majority of baby formula for sale in the US. Those companies are Mead Johnson (Enfamil), Abbott Nutrition (Similac), Nestlé (Gerber), and Perrigo (which makes generic formulas sold in many grocery and pharmacy chains and by other brands, including Earth’s Best and Bobbie). A few smaller manufacturers have more recently entered the market: ByHeart (made in the US), Kendamil (made in the UK), and Aussie Bubs (made in Australia).

and

Quote

Brand-name and store-name formulas are nearly identical. A 2017 article on infant feeding in the journal Pediatrics states this. Pediatricians Jenny Thomas and Anthony Porto both told us that parents should feel comfortable using store-brand or generic infant formulas because they contain all of the same FDA-required nutrients and ingredients as formulas made by Enfamil, Similac, and Gerber (which cost two to three times as much).

Perrigo makes basically all the generic formula you see and you can tell across the board based on top color/box style. they are the same no matter where you buy it. this gets super important if we have another formula shortage and their website has all their products on the top and you can click on it to see what is what and where to find it.

here's an example for their "advantage premium" formula (silver top) https://www.perrigopediatrics.com/advantage/

we use the kirklands, can't recommend it enough - during the formula shortage it was hard to find anywhere so we did some switching out/around but Kirklands was stocked way better/more than everyone else.

looks like Perrigo makes the formula you showed above, but just know you are spending a fuckload, literally, for that vs something like Procare or "generic" formula.

that Bobbie is about $1.84 per powder oz (i'm sure there is some savings if you order ahead/subscribe or whatever) while Kirklands Procare is $0.69 per oz - the advantage premiums above are somewhere in the $0.70-$0.80 per oz range depending on what you get and where you get it.

here is some work someone on reddit did on a big comparison across the board last year on cost: https://old.reddit.com/r/FormulaFeeders/comments/yrhehr/i_did_a_comparison_of_all_the_big_brand_name/

• bobbie organic is at about $0.93 per 4 oz bottle, ballpark at 8 per day for 32 oz / day = 240 bottles per month = ~$223/month
• kirklands procare is at about $0.35 per 4 oz bottle, ballpark at 8 per day for 32 oz of formula / day = 240 bottles per month = ~$84/month

if you are 100% in on organic, the wirecutter article i linked above has some more info in it and offers an option that is much less expensive on a per oz basis - somewhere around the $1.39 / oz range

again - no judgement here around what you end up doing or organic vs non organic or formula vs breast feeding. just trying to educate.

don't let fucking anyone bully you around formula vs breast feeding. nurses at hospital will ask but that's only because they have to. if you go exclusive formula feed from day 1 there is no downside to the baby. if you want more info on the "value" of breast feeding Emily Oster touches a bunch on it in Cribsheet

be ready for the olds to ask you what you are doing, folks you don't know, everyone. EVERYONE HAS AN OPINION. just lie to their faces if they are old, you don't know them well and they ask - just say you are breastfeeding the baby

 

[hornian 5219]

1 hour ago, locodos said:

3?  Can't play man, gotta play zone

I'm getting the snip so I'm done at three, but to be honest, once you have 3, you could have 5 with no big life changes (other than vehicles). When the older ones have friends over, it's honestly much easier. 

[NoName 16354]

2 minutes ago, Celery Man said:

And buy wipes in bulk

again costco is awesome for this (same for sams) on a cost standpoint. BUY A BUNCH.

[BurntOrange&White 39934]

5 minutes ago, NoName said:

going to spoiler this, but realize none of this is judgemental just trying to be educational
 

  Hide contents

wirecutter goes into it but basically all formula in the usa is from 1 of 4 companies

https://www.nytimes.com/wirecutter/reviews/best-baby-formula/

 

and

 

Perrigo makes basically all the generic formula you see and you can tell across the board based on top color/box style. they are the same no matter where you buy it. this gets super important if we have another formula shortage and their website has all their products on the top and you can click on it to see what is what and where to find it.

here's an example for their "advantage premium" formula (silver top) https://www.perrigopediatrics.com/advantage/

we use the kirklands, can't recommend it enough - during the formula shortage it was hard to find anywhere so we did some switching out/around but Kirklands was stocked way better/more than everyone else.

looks like Perrigo makes the formula you showed above, but just know you are spending a fuckload, literally, for that vs something like Procare or "generic" formula.

that Bobbie is about $1.84 per powder oz (i'm sure there is some savings if you order ahead/subscribe or whatever) while Kirklands Procare is $0.69 per oz - the advantage premiums above are somewhere in the $0.70-$0.80 per oz range depending on what you get and where you get it.

here is some work someone on reddit did on a big comparison across the board last year on cost: https://old.reddit.com/r/FormulaFeeders/comments/yrhehr/i_did_a_comparison_of_all_the_big_brand_name/

• bobbie organic is at about $0.93 per 4 oz bottle, ballpark at 8 per day for 32 oz / day = 240 bottles per month = ~$223/month
• kirklands procare is at about $0.35 per 4 oz bottle, ballpark at 8 per day for 32 oz of formula / day = 240 bottles per month = ~$84/month

if you are 100% in on organic, the wirecutter article i linked above has some more info in it and offers an option that is much less expensive on a per oz basis - somewhere around the $1.39 / oz range

again - no judgement here around what you end up doing or organic vs non organic or formula vs breast feeding. just trying to educate.

don't let fucking anyone bully you around formula vs breast feeding. nurses at hospital will ask but that's only because they have to. if you go exclusive formula feed from day 1 there is no downside to the baby. if you want more info on the "value" of breast feeding Emily Oster touches a bunch on it in Cribsheet

be ready for the olds to ask you what you are doing, folks you don't know, everyone. EVERYONE HAS AN OPINION. just lie to their faces if they are old, you don't know them well and they ask - just say you are breastfeeding the baby

 

She wants to breastfeed, if possible. If not, then we'll do formula. I think it will also depend on how much work the pumping every 2 hours is for her but it's 100% her decision.

Edited March 26 by BurntOrange&White

[hookem2010 2624]

12 minutes ago, Celery Man said:

on the diaper pale thing - i know people like the one linked above and I wish we had gotten that one instead of a... whatever it is we have, one of those fuckers with the proprietary bags. With kid #1, the changing table was in her bedroom, which is on the second floor. I emptied the diaper genie every day to make it not retchworthy. Kid 2, we have a little table attachment set up on the pack and play that we keep set up downstairs (in addition to the one on his dresser upstairs) and I change 95% of his diapers downstairs. Kitchen trash is right there and I chuck them in there - typing that, maybe I'd be grossed out if it was an under counter thing, but it's just on the periphery of the kitchen in an open 1st floor. I empty that trash every day and the diaper genie doesn't get used much this time around. Much prefer it. My convoluted advice summed up here really is - make a changing station near where the action in your house is. And buy wipes in bulk.

For bottles, I feel like the kid kinda chose the bottle, although we settled on the same bottles for kid 2 so maybe we're influencing that more than we think. These are what we wound up with and they're a little bit of a pain (6 parts counting the lid - base, gasket, body, top, nipple, lid) but I'm like Forrest Gump cleaning his rifle with these - 

 

what I wish for you is that you find the bottle that works for you well without buying every goddamn bottle on the market

Look at this 3 month old. He was holding his head up almost immediately and desperately wants to stand 

Very jealous of those kitchen cabinets as I work to salvage mine from the 1990's. Oh, and cute kid!

[Daddy Fat Sax 53]

14 minutes ago, hornian said:

I'm getting the snip so I'm done at three, but to be honest, once you have 3, you could have 5 with no big life changes (other than vehicles). When the older ones have friends over, it's honestly much easier. 

Ooh I’m afraid that's not true. 

I'm reminded of the Jim Gaffigan line about having 4 kids. Imagine you're drowning and then someone throws you a baby. 

Some definite changes happen. You can convince yourself to try to squeeze 5 into a bigger hotel room or one with a pullout couch or whatever. But once you hit 6 family members travel anywhere becomes a connected rooms/jumbo suite big deal. 

Of course, the cost of living goes up. We just recently became a 2lb family. When we make spaghetti now, we need 2lb of ground beef and more sauce to feed everyone. 

Also as they older, every added kid and their activities pile up. Our youngest just turned 6 and ever since he's gotten into sports the schedule complexity has blown up. Looking forward to the oldest being able to drive. 

This isn't to discourage people from 4. It's a fun, wild ride. 

[Da Fino 2783]

14 minutes ago, BurntOrange&amp;White said:

She wants to breastfeed, if possible. If not, then we'll do formula. I think it will also depend on how much work the pumping every 2 hours is for her but it's 100% her decision.

Keep in mind that if feeding/latching is an issue while in the hospital, you can tell them to bring in the donor milk or formula. Fed baby is best baby. 

[Celery Man 20966]

12 minutes ago, hookem2010 said:

Very jealous of those kitchen cabinets as I work to salvage mine from the 1990's. Oh, and cute kid!

I guess they weren't as rough as I remember maybe but when we bought the house, kitchen looked like this - 

 

i have zero regrets paying whatever company it was a bunch of money to sand/plug/paint/install hardware/etc the existing cabinets. although right when the project was done my wife made a comment about how maybe we should change the doors on the cabinets and it was one of the rare moments where she saw my face and never spoke about it again

[Dish Boggett 67]

24 minutes ago, NoName said:

again costco is awesome for this (same for sams) on a cost standpoint. BUY A BUNCH.

Can't imagine the cost of diapers currently. In the early Obama years we had 3 in diapers at the same time. 

At the time the cheapest way to get them was through amazon subscribe and save. unit costs were about $.25/each

[BurntOrange&White 39934]

6 minutes ago, Da Fino said:

Keep in mind that if feeding/latching is an issue while in the hospital, you can tell them to bring in the donor milk or formula. Fed baby is best baby. 

We have watched some videos and they say if you want a specific formula if Brest feeding isn't possible to bring it in your hospital bag. Also say in the videos to take everything they give you in the hospital in the room is yours and to take it. Also mentioned asking for an extra dermaplast?

 

1 minute ago, Dish Boggett said:

Can't imagine the cost of diapers currently. In the early Obama years we had 3 in diapers at the same time. 

At the time the cheapest way to get them was through amazon subscribe and save. unit costs were about $.25/each

We are going kirkland diapers as they are made in the huggies factory. I think size 1-3 of Kirkland for 190ish diapers it's 35$ for 4-6 they are 45$ for 170ish