That time you found a band-aid in your food

[Bozo_Casanova 26488]

I found a a band-aid in a burrito at Allsups in 1995.

It was dawn in the Panhandle and we had driven all night, after deciding to go skiing when the bars closed on 6th street.

When I was taking my second bite I felt something on my lip that didn't feel like food, looked, and there was a band-aid, with a red/green splotch on the pad.  I considered my options for a moment, then I picked it out, finished the burrito, and we drove straight through to Denver. 

Edited October 10, 2019 by Bozo_Casanova
too much brain tonic

[Sbbruin 21861]

I've pulled hair out of my food and ate it.  Band-aid?  You're fucking sick.

[DaysOff 7951]

During my boy scout order of the arrow initiation weekend I cut the shit out of my hand while carving my arrow. They put me on kitchen patrol for the remainder and had me stir a giant pot of cole slaw by hand for the Saturday night meal. I looked down and the band aid was gone. Somebody got a bloody bandage in their slaw, but they weren't allowed to talk.

[Marfa Low Crown 2546]

52 minutes ago, Bozo_Casanova said:

 I considered my options for a moment, then I picked it out, finished the burrito, and we drove straight through to Denver. 

That's disgusting.

Rep. 

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

Does it count if I found it in a finger sandwich?

[RPM 26322]

Never found a BandAid, but I did find birdshot in my meatloaf at a rural Kentucky truck stop. They don't kill cows with birdshot.

[WhatTheBuck 28788]

Must have been Paco's day off. 

[mulletpelini 5212]

Chinese place, had it delivered.  Found the band-aid, immediately felt sick.  Called the place, woman is incredulous, says "I be right rare".  3 minutes later she's rear, hands me $10 cash (#23 was $7) grabs the #23 (I was holding it with one hand and pointing at the band aid with the other as I explained the situation) out of my hand and runs out to her car and leaves.

[markstanco 12577]

Profit!

[futureman 22485]

1 hour ago, mulletpelini said:

Chinese place, had it delivered.  Found the band-aid, immediately felt sick.  Called the place, woman is incredulous, says "I be right rare".  3 minutes later she's rear, hands me $10 cash (#23 was $7) grabs the #23 (I was holding it with one hand and pointing at the band aid with the other as I explained the situation) out of my hand and runs out to her car and leaves.

sounds like the wolf.  she solves problems. 

[futureman 22485]

5 hours ago, Bozo_Casanova said:

I found a a band-aid in a burrito at Allsups in 1995.

It was dawn in the Panhandle and we had driven all night, after deciding to go skiing when the bars closed on 6th street.

When I was taking my second bite I felt something on my lip that didn't feel like food, looked, and there was a band-aid, with a red/green splotch on the pad.  I considered my options for a moment, then I picked it out, finished the burrito, and we drove straight through to Denver. 

 nasty.  but any biohazards on that bandaid were fried to death in the oil.  I still would’ve tossed it though.  

[Anastasis 23475]

I did a lot of shit in 1995 that I don't want to repeat in polite company.

Eating a fucking allsups bandaid burrito isn't one of them. 

 

[SquishMitten 10415]

On 10/10/2019 at 6:58 PM, RPM said:

Never found a BandAid, but I did find birdshot in my meatloaf at a rural Kentucky truck stop. They don't kill cows with birdshot.

It's actually not that uncommon. Big packing companies have special equipment to detect bird/buckshot before it gets sent out. Likely comes from hunters missing their target or drunk ranchers popping off a shot to get a stubborn cow to move along. I'd guess that truck stop gets it's meat from a local butcher that doesn't have any fancy equipment.

[Wally Fairway 5559]

On 10/10/2019 at 5:17 PM, Bozo_Casanova said:

I found a a band-aid in a burrito at Allsups in 1995.

It was dawn in the Panhandle and we had driven all night, after deciding to go skiing when the bars closed on 6th street.

When I was taking my second bite I felt something on my lip that didn't feel like food, looked, and there was a band-aid, with a red/green splotch on the pad.  I considered my options for a moment, then I picked it out, finished the burrito, and we drove straight through to Denver. 

And that is how I got Aids/Hep C/Gonorrhea

I finished your story for you.

{no way I would have been able to continue eating that, unless falling down drunk or stupidly high}

[tantric superman 4667]

Heard this story from my mom about my wonderful niece.  The kid was maybe 10ish at the time.

She was eating tortilla soup at Jim's in San Antonio (the Bandera one in Leon Valley).  She found a rubber band in said tortilla soup.

They apologized, and asked her if she would like anything else.

She thought and then said "tortilla soup".

[tantric superman 4667]

 

[WhatTheBuck 28788]

11 hours ago, tantric superman said:

Heard this story from my mom about my wonderful niece.  The kid was maybe 10ish at the time.

She was eating tortilla soup at Jim's in San Antonio (the Bandera one in Leon Valley).  She found a rubber band in said tortilla soup.

They apologized, and asked her if she would like anything else.

She thought and then said "tortilla soup".

Paco!

[Spaulding Smails 1553]

A few weeks ago we were down in South Padre for a friend's birthday party.  Staying at The Pearl.  First time I'd been there in probably 15+ years.  Hadn't changed a bit.  Literally.  Nothing had been updated.  But, we were mostly drunk most of the time, so it worked.

After a day of fishing then an hour or two on the beach, we went back to the pool to drink and swim before heading to dinner.  I jumped in the pool to cool off and swam underwater from one end to the other.  When I came up, I had a band aid (not mine) stuck to my forehead.  I guess it was floating in the water and I intercepted it.  

I chunked it into the flowerbed, chugged my shitty rum drink and decided that was enough swimming for the day.

[RDCanecutter 26452]

On 10/10/2019 at 7:54 PM, mulletpelini said:

Chinese place, had it delivered.  Found the band-aid, immediately felt sick.  Called the place, woman is incredulous, says "I be right rare".  3 minutes later she's rear, hands me $10 cash (#23 was $7) grabs the #23 (I was holding it with one hand and pointing at the band aid with the other as I explained the situation) out of my hand and runs out to her car and leaves.

Speed is of the essence if you're gonna resell #23.

[RDCanecutter 26452]

A'ight, this one time? In Mexico? I'm standin outside this nightclub in Colima called "Olimpus" or "Olimpia" or some shit. and I'm tryin to buy a hotdog.

Hotdog stand is a simple pushcart with open condiment buckets, run by a simple little guy, under a bare light bulb, which attracted moths and bugs.

Little guy is fixing me my hotdog, little this, little that, when this BIG FUCKING RHINO BEETLE swoops past my head like a damn 6-legged sparrow. WTF? Little guy keeps on prepping the hot dog.

Then TORA TORA TORA, the Big Fucking Rhino Beetle (BFRB) nose-dive gloops into the mayonnaise. Submerged.

I immediately lose all ability to speak Spanish or English. I just point at the mayonnaise container going "Ah. Ah. Ah." You can see the BFRB doing backstrokes right under the surface if you look hard. Little Guy doesn't look hard. He just figures I want mayonnaise, so he sticks that long metal spoon with the twirly handle into the goop, shoving the BFRB back and forth, then spreads mayonnaise on my dog. I'm like "Aw! No! Ah Ah Ah," and keep pointing.

I mean, BFRB is so big, like, maybe it's got a soul. I feel like I'm watching a puppy drown.

Finally, Little Guy picks up on BFRB's presence, and scoops him out with a kung-fu spoon flick. BFRB hits the cobblestones and wanders off leaving a jizz trail.

Little Guy hands me a hotdog covered in unwanted probably expired definitely Big Beetle shit-in and no doubt grave of generations of bugs mayonnaise.

It was good.

[Armybrat 40851]

No extra charge for the bug shit?

whadda deal!

[HenryJames 66121]

[Incredulity 11675]

On 10/10/2019 at 4:58 PM, RPM said:

Never found a BandAid, but I did find birdshot in my meatloaf at a rural Kentucky truck stop. They don't kill cows with birdshot.

pretty common in beef.  Some ranchers like to motivate cattle with shotguns.  Also, rural a-holes love peppering cattle with buckshot.

 

https://www.beefmagazine.com/mag/beef_gut_shot

[HenryJames 66121]

I read Beef Magazine for the articles.

[ulukinatme 1764]

Never found a band-aid in my food, but a few years ago I got a Spicy Chicken sandwich from Wendy's.  I took a bite and felt something smooth and plastic moving back and forth against my teeth.  Somehow the big label with date information that they put on their food containers managed to find it's way onto my sandwich.  How the hell that happens and nobody notices, I don't know.  It may not have been a bloody band-aid, but I was still grossed out and threw the whole thing out.  The whole feeling of that label sliding across my teeth put me in a weird place.

[RPM 26322]

I found an oak leaf in a Royale with Cheese once when I was in Jr High. Pretty sure it wasn't randomly blown in the kitchen door and managed to land on the burger during prep unnoticed because there wasn't an oak tree within a mile of the place.

[RDCanecutter 26452]

35 minutes ago, RPM said:

I found an oak leaf in a Royale with Cheese once when I was in Jr High. Pretty sure it wasn't randomly blown in the kitchen door and managed to land on the burger during prep unnoticed because there wasn't an oak tree within a mile of the place.

Oak leaf sounds like the kind of thing that'd stick to a man's shoe after he stepped in some cow shit, and then it ended up on the slaughterhouse floor gettin scooped up with the flat-head shovel.

[Girdwood 118]