2020 Coaching Staff

[Hiphopopotamos 20,865]

4 minutes ago, Goodman said:

Tom better lock Ash up before those meathead buckeyes come steal his boy.

There were reports that Ash was waiting to see if the DC at Ohio St opened up before making any decisions on his future. 

[DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt 12,301]

we’re fucking this up, aren’t we?

[Burt Macklin 18,988]

 

2 hours ago, Cap Hooked said:

well no, but yes. I just mean if what Burton is saying is true that’s just a ridiculous hire

You really should've stopped yourself right there. 

[jinx 2,635]

44 minutes ago, Steel Shank said:

I fear if we fuck up the coordinator hires, it will open the window for aggy to realize their full potential as a true elite football powerhouse (i.e. the next Alabama).

This truly is our fear dude

[TexasEd 8,062]

12 hours ago, Orange&White said:

Inflation is a bitch. It was "fitty twice" when I was growing up.

 

14 hours ago, Sock Drawer said:

Young whippersnapper! It was "forty twice" when I first heard this. Imagine, $.79 for a fifth of premium fortified wine, albeit of undisclosed vintage. "The American Classic of Bum Wines." Citrus wine with natural flavors and caramel color… vinted and bottled in Modesto, California.  (Trust your sarcasm meter's in good working order.)

I thought you guys were going to ask me:

What's the reason?

A:  It's Rugby Season

[texifornia 56,434]

13 minutes ago, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:

we’re fucking this up, aren’t we?

[TexasEd 8,062]

2 hours ago, RollLeft said:

I'm going with Harrell has a clause in his contract that he can leave at anytime for a promotion, ala Kliffy, but can't leave 30 days prior to a signing period if for the same position.  

My theory is he gets a bonus paid for being on staff on Dec 19.  

[Minor Orangeblack 112]

2 minutes ago, texifornia said:

Was this old footage of Sonny Cumbie’s reaction when offered the Texas OC job?

[Henry Hill 3,156]

1 hour ago, The Earl of Texas said:

“Emphasis on tackling” well I mean yeah you’d THINK that shit would be a given.

[Fondren & Main 6,658]

1 hour ago, Steel Shank said:

I fear if we fuck up the coordinator hires, it will open the window for aggy to realize their full potential as a true elite football powerhouse (i.e. the next Alabama).

This post has got aggy thinking about some snatch...sheep snatch.

Edited December 14, 2019 by Fondren & Main

[closetohumping 17,380]

3 hours ago, 6th Street said:

I can't wait to boo Herman off the field next year after we give up 70 points to LSU

Won’t be able to hear you.  Games in Baton Rouge.  I will boo him when we lose the game before.  Not sure who were playing but we’ll lose cuz Tom is a loser 

[Rhinotx 499]

50 minutes ago, Minor Orangeblack said:

Is the Rando guy in the back getting buttzecks?

The green arrow?

[williemackgarza 1,826]

Most shitty teams have already fired and hired head cosches, ocs, dcs and assistants.
We just standing around with our pants down dick in hand inside the whore house with a pocket full of money and blue balls.
Damn. Sad

[ruitxn 295]

4 hours ago, Goodman said:

Tom needs someone to tell him how to act like a leader.

CDC maybe???

[Rimbo 25,752]

2 hours ago, Minor Orangeblack said:

Is the Rando guy in the back getting buttzecks?

[Modessit 5,595]

Tom better lock Ash up before those meathead buckeyes come steal his boy.

So if Herman hires Ash then Herman sucks for hiring his buddy who sucks.

There were reports that Ash was waiting to see if the DC at Ohio St opened up before making any decisions on his future. 

But if Ash becomes DC for tOSU then Herman sucks for not hiring Ash right away because obviously Ash is awesome if tOSU wants him.

Do I have that right?

[UncleBuck 6,444]

But if Ash becomes DC for tOSU then Herman sucks for not hiring Ash right away because obviously Ash is awesome if tOSU wants him.

Do I have that right?

Yes. The wringing of pussy over Herman possibly making a comfort hire in Ash has now become a wringing of pussy over Herman not making a comfort hire in Ash based off of zero reports of Ash having done anything.




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[Spawn of Cthulhu 2,241]

3 hours ago, Modessit said:

So if Herman hires Ash then Herman sucks for hiring his buddy who sucks. But if Ash becomes DC for tOSU then Herman sucks for not hiring Ash right away because obviously Ash is awesome if tOSU wants him.

Do I have that right?

Sürlinger's Cat

Edited December 14, 2019 by Spawn of Cthulhu

[Knoxtnhorn 5,928]

1 hour ago, Spawn of Cthulhu said:

Sürlinger's Cat

Well done.

[bigcigar 1,161]

@immamac time to change the banner to nobody hired?

[KYHorn 16,808]

4 hours ago, Modessit said:

So if Herman hires Ash then Herman sucks for hiring his buddy who sucks. But if Ash becomes DC for tOSU then Herman sucks for not hiring Ash right away because obviously Ash is awesome if tOSU wants him.

Do I have that right?

Correct. We need to get tOSU to hire Ash and only then can Herman hire him.

[Tex Long 4,326]

7 hours ago, Rhinotx said:

The green arrow?

Terrible band name, but might be okay for a new line of Glow-in-the-Dark Condoms.

[closetohumping 17,380]

5 hours ago, Modessit said:

So if Herman hires Ash then Herman sucks for hiring his buddy who sucks. But if Ash becomes DC for tOSU then Herman sucks for not hiring Ash right away because obviously Ash is awesome if tOSU wants him.

Do I have that right?

You do. But a shorter way to say it is Herman sucks.  

[Coelenterate Fuccboi 13,010]

Now that the board has completely turned on the head coach, maybe we’ll start winning something significant. 

[LTtxfan 48,928]

^^^ What does "wooooof woof woooo rawr rawr" even mean??  

So for folks who don't want Ash as the next Texas DC, you may get your wish if he goes to ohio state.

[Tex Pete 20,136]

8 minutes ago, LTtxfan said:

^^^ What does "wooooof woof woooo rawr rawr" even mean??  

It’s the sound women make in Ohio. 

[Jebus 1,300]

12 minutes ago, LTtxfan said:

^^^ What does "wooooof woof woooo rawr rawr" even mean??  

you do know that Leroy is a dog, right?  I mean it's right there in his twitter picture.

[PilotsError 2,280]

oh, how silly of us to overlook that.

[LTtxfan 48,928]

10 hours ago, Steel Shank said:

I fear if we fuck up the coordinator hires, it will open the window for aggy to realize their full potential as a true elite football powerhouse (i.e. the next Alabama).

[DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt 12,301]

No news is good news. We’re performing a diligent search that will surface the best candidates for the job and ensure we bring coordinators in that will return Texas to its former glory.

Tom Herman’s got this.

 

[EastTexan 662]

3 minutes ago, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:

No news is good news. We’re performing a diligent search that will surface the best candidates for the job and ensure we bring coordinators in that will return Texas to its former glory.

Tom Herman’s got this.

 

Woof, woof, barf, barf, bow wow. Whatever the fuck.

[Mo Horn 8,795]

47 minutes ago, LTtxfan said:

^^^ What does "wooooof woof woooo rawr rawr" even mean??  

So for folks who don't want Ash as the next Texas DC, you may get your wish if he goes to ohio state.

And many of them will now post about how pissed they are that OSU hired him and we didn't. Because when OSU hires him it will be because they know something and her really is a great coordinator and Tom was to stupid to know that and hire him first. 

TL:DR Surly gonna Surly

[6th Street 6,340]

Chris Ash had some dominant defenses at Rutgers - won 2 Big 10 games in 4 years lol. 

I'm sure Ohio State is falling all over themselves to hire this bum 

[LTtxfan 48,928]

42 minutes ago, Jebus said:

you do know that Leroy is a dog, right?  I mean it's right there in his twitter picture.

[closetojumping 62,131]

13 minutes ago, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:

No news is good news. We’re performing a diligent search that will surface the best candidates for the job and ensure we bring coordinators in that will return Texas to its former glory.

Tom Herman’s got this.

 

Watching your tumbledown on this thread has been a pleasure to watch. 

It’s at the point for me now that I can fathom almost any outcome. Herman could announce himself for all open positions. He could name Bozo the Clown as the new OC. He could bring Zach Smith in as the WR coach. He could just randomly start appearing shirtless and disoriented in public. I think we have to begin to come to terms with the concept that the only certainty here is abject despair. 

[LTtxfan 48,928]

5 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Watching your tumbledown on this thread has been a pleasure to watch. 

It’s at the point for me now that I can fathom almost any outcome. Herman could announce himself for all open positions. He could name Bozo the Clown as the new OC. He could bring Zach Smith in as the WR coach. He could just randomly start appearing shirtless and disoriented in public. I think we have to begin to come to terms with the concept that the only certainty here is abject despair. 

[DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt 12,301]

On 10/26/2019 at 5:35 PM, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:

We’ll see wholesale changes on this staff and it won’t matter. 

Tom Herman is fucked. I think he’s lost this program and doesn’t have any personal equity with the players to win their commitment back.

Shit is about to get ugly and the upcoming coaching searches are going to be a shitshow.

To be fair, @closetojumping, I hit rock bottom on this coaching search in October. 

[Hank Chinaski 6,310]

8 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Herman could announce himself for all open positions.

He could just randomly start appearing shirtless and disoriented in public. 

I can't be the only one on here thinking that this combo would be pretty great?

[Handcruser 2,805]

Correct. We need to get tOSU to hire Ash and only then can Herman hire him.

He will be a sitting P5 coordinator then!


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[Hiphopopotamos 20,865]

28 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

Chris Ash had some dominant defenses at Rutgers - won 2 Big 10 games in 4 years lol. 

I'm sure Ohio State is falling all over themselves to hire this bum 

If only there were some precedent for a shit HC going on to become one of the best and highest paid DCs in college football. 

Edited December 14, 2019 by Hiphopopotamos

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

9 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

I think we have to begin to come to terms with the concept that the only certainty here is abject despair. 

[Tex Long 4,326]

1 minute ago, Walden Ponderer said:

2,3,1

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

4 minutes ago, Tex Long said:

2,3,1

Been a while, huh, Tex?

[PilotsError 2,280]

Well he's not wrong.

[closetojumping 62,131]

14 minutes ago, Hank Chinaski said:

I can't be the only one on here thinking that this combo would be pretty great?

I agree. If this guy is going to damage the program, I’d like for him to do so in unthinkable ways that are so fucking absurd that they border on performance art and make the on-field humiliation more palatable. 

[BigSwingingD 719]

4 hours ago, Spawn of Cthulhu said:

Sürlinger's Cat

Perfect @Spawn of Cthulhu, just what we need...Cat facts.

[HenryJames 65,868]

19 minutes ago, Tex Long said:

2,3,1

Racist, imo.

[Newy25 7,638]

I regretfully checked in with my guy and suffice it to say the perception is not that this is some calculated Mensa move to delay announcing the coaches. There is growing anxiety that we have no idea wtf we are doing. 
 

[satyanash 14,276]

55 minutes ago, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:

No news is good news. We’re performing a diligent search that will surface the best candidates for the job and ensure we bring coordinators in that will return Texas to its former glory.

Tom Herman’s got this.

[closetojumping 62,131]

4 minutes ago, Newy25 said:

I regretfully checked in with my guy and suffice it to say the perception is not that this is some calculated Mensa move to delay announcing the coaches. There is growing anxiety that we have no idea wtf we are doing. 
 

This is a perfectly timed troll. Pos rep.