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DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt

By DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt
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Vito Andolini

Vito Andolini 9459

Posted
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15 hours ago, Bobby_Batronic said:

We can’t screw this up. We just have to decide whether we want to go ahead and jump in the freezing water and die of hypothermia, or head back to our cabin and wait for it to implode as the Tomtanic plunges into the icy depths.  

The Meyerpathia wants no part of this rescue effort until the tragedy has played out. 

At what minute mark does Kate Winslett show her tits?

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Minor Orangeblack
Minor Orangeblack

Blue Bell is announcing the release of a new flavor, Gordita Latina to be served exclusively at Texas Athletic facilities and DKR, it will feature hints of Canela, White Apples and Mexican vanilla. 

closetojumping
closetojumping

A few things: -If Harrell is the OC, and the rumors are legit but don’t take anything for granted until ink is dry, then Traylor could make a return. Herman would be admitting to a mistake in let

satyanash
satyanash

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Fud

Fud 9724

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35 minutes ago, Burt Macklin said:

He’d probably be my favorite of the names on the list so far, but he’s not a home run hire either. He did a great job at Memphis, then inherited a top 10 defense at Mixzou and kept them there for a year as DC, then really fell off for 2 years as HC and then got them back up to solid his last two years. He has a pretty good resume, but there are still some question marks with him.  He’s only been a P5 DC for one year and hasn’t faced much in the way of quality offenses while at Missouri.
 

Other note about Odom is that Most of the Mixzou fans seemed to like him even after he was fired. If you compare their comments about Odom as a person/coach compared to Ash and Rutgers, it’s about as stark of a contrast as Jersey Man and South Austin’s mom’s sexual histories. 

Here’s Odom’s numbers as DC/HC:

Memphis 

2011 (year before he was DC. They were like 2-10 this year, so talent level Odom inherited was low): 113 in FEI, 111 in S&P

2012: 65, 73

2013: 64, 50

2014: 27, 32

2015 (year after he left): 59, 82

Mizzou:

2014 (year before): 11, 8

2015: 8, 3. One thing I’d note about the 2015 numbers is that 8 of the top 16 defenses that year were in the SEC (including aggy lulz), so either their defenses were just that elite or facing shitty, basic offenses can really inflate even “adjusted” defensive rankings. I’ll let you decide which conclusion to draw.

2016 (became HC): 90, 85

2017: 88, 61

2018: 25, 25

2019: 34.

 

I don't like that Odom and Ash don't have a ton of experience in heavy spread leagues (Odom does have a little from his AAC time), but I like the idea of potentially having two ex P5 HCs as co-DCs and an ex DC as a position coach if we can land Odom, Ash, and Walters. I have no idea how plausible that is though. 

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Longhorn01

Longhorn01 32

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chicken-sandwich-image*600xx1772-1181-0-296.jpg
The mania over the Popeye's chicken sandwich, stoked by some timely tweets from Austin-based marketing firm GSD&M, has created more than $110 million in earned value for the fried chicken chain.


Please quit. You’re embarrassing yourself. Go back to your direct response traffic driving emails and hard-working display ads. Quit pretending to be Don Draper.
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HtownHorn

HtownHorn 15231

Posted
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1 hour ago, Fud said:

I don't like that Odom and Ash don't have a ton of experience in heavy spread leagues (Odom does have a little from his AAC time), but I like the idea of potentially having two ex P5 HCs as co-DCs and an ex DC as a position coach if we can land Odom, Ash, and Walters. I have no idea how plausible that is though. 

Now that would be interesting. Odom and Ash as CoDC's like Ash did it at OSU with Fickell, and Walters is the other DB coach. Then you would look to bring in another DL coach with Giles.

Odom, Ash, Giles, Okam/Haley, Walters would be a salty defensive staff.

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Chopper

Chopper 17436

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23 minutes ago, Eggo said:

I haven't read every one of the 4200 posts, but did Iowa State give Jon Heacock a raise or something? Wondering why we're not pursuing him more aggressively. 

If you did read every single one of the 4200 posts you'd know that nobody knows who we're pursuing, except for the most obvious of the obvious.

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Eggo

Eggo 4026

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Just now, Chopper said:

If you did read every single one of the 4200 posts you'd know that nobody knows who we're pursuing, except for the most obvious of the obvious.

Let me rephrase: Why aren't we talking about pursuing Heacock more aggressively? 

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Huckleberry

Huckleberry 34720

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I have to say, I'm actually encouraged by the fact this is taking a while. I was resigned to the fact that Herman would make more comfort hires because that's who he is.

But think about it. Let's all pretend for a minute that this hiring process is going exactly how we wanted it to go. Herman is not making comfort hires while only considering people he already knows. He is researching candidates, determining best fits for the program, interviewing the top candidates, and deciding from there. In this crazy world where Texas football is actually doing something right, where would we be 10 days after announcing we're making changes and 4 days after the regular season ends for all potential candidates?

We'd be right where we are. Rumors of candidates but no leaks from inside Bellmont. Internet fans who were whining 10 days ago about how we were going to make stupid comfort hires quickly now whining about how we haven't hired anyone yet so we're doomed. Don't get me wrong, I still don't see Herman surviving here long-term, but shouldn't we all admit that this might be going exactly how we wanted it to go when the Tech game went final?

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Tex Long

Tex Long 4667

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Can't believe how you dumbasses can't crack this code - it obviously means we're getting Urban, and MensaTom is moving down to OC.

Popeyes = Pope Yes.

MensaTom will be back on OJT for the next couple of years. The OC part, he's got already, but he has a lot to learn from Urban. It's a win-win-win for errbody.

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Vertigo

Vertigo 20500

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6 minutes ago, Huckleberry said:

I have to say, I'm actually encouraged by the fact this is taking a while. I was resigned to the fact that Herman would make more comfort hires because that's who he is.

But think about it. Let's all pretend for a minute that this hiring process is going exactly how we wanted it to go. Herman is not making comfort hires while only considering people he already knows. He is researching candidates, determining best fits for the program, interviewing the top candidates, and deciding from there. In this crazy world where Texas football is actually doing something right, where would we be 10 days after announcing we're making changes and 4 days after the regular season ends for all potential candidates?

We'd be right where we are. Rumors of candidates but no leaks from inside Bellmont. Internet fans who were whining 10 days ago about how we were going to make stupid comfort hires quickly now whining about how we haven't hired anyone yet so we're doomed. Don't get me wrong, I still don't see Herman surviving here long-term, but shouldn't we all admit that this might be going exactly how we wanted it to go when the Tech game went final?

I'll grant you that. Interestingly, Herman made a good hire in Hand when forced to go outside of his circle last season. Who knows, maybe Herman can actually hire the right people when he is objectively evaluating people for the job. We know he is a very good evaluator of recruiting talent, I would imagine he could be a pretty good evaluator of coaches that he doesn't have personal relationships with if he were to use the same process. 

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MoJames

MoJames 8258

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10 minutes ago, Eggo said:

Let me rephrase: Why aren't we talking about pursuing Heacock more aggressively? 

I called Herman and CDC this morning and asked this question. They explained the situation with a very appropriate discussion of koalas. Koalas are fucking horrible animals. They have one of the smallest brain to body ratios of any mammal, additionally - their brains are smooth. A brain is folded to increase the surface area for neurons. If you present a koala with leaves plucked from a branch, laid on a flat surface, the koala will not recognize it as food. They are too thick to adapt their feeding behavior to cope with change. In a room full of potential food, they can literally starve to death. This is not the token of an animal that is winning at life. Speaking of stupidity and food, one of the likely reasons for their primitive brains is the fact that additionally to being poisonous, eucalyptus leaves (the only thing they eat) have almost no nutritional value. They can't afford the extra energy to think, they sleep more than 80% of their fucking lives. When they are awake all they do is eat, shit and occasionally scream like fucking satan. Because eucalyptus leaves hold such little nutritional value, koalas have to ferment the leaves in their guts for days on end. Unlike their brains, they have the largest hind gut to body ratio of any mammal. Many herbivorous mammals have adaptations to cope with harsh plant life taking its toll on their teeth, rodents for instance have teeth that never stop growing, some animals only have teeth on their lower jaw, grinding plant matter on bony plates in the tops of their mouths, others have enlarged molars that distribute the wear and break down plant matter more efficiently... Koalas are no exception, when their teeth erode down to nothing, they resolve the situation by starving to death, because they're fucking terrible animals. Being mammals, koalas raise their joeys on milk (admittedly, one of the lowest milk yields to body ratio... There's a trend here). When the young joey needs to transition from rich, nourishing substances like milk, to eucalyptus (a plant that seems to be making it abundantly clear that it doesn't want to be eaten), it finds it does not have the necessary gut flora to digest the leaves. To remedy this, the young joey begins nuzzling its mother's anus until she leaks a little diarrhoea (actually fecal pap, slightly less digested), which he then proceeds to slurp on. This partially digested plant matter gives him just what he needs to start developing his digestive system. Of course, he may not even have needed to bother nuzzling his mother. She may have been suffering from incontinence. Why? Because koalas are riddled with chlamydia. In some areas the infection rate is 80% or higher. This statistic isn't helped by the fact that one of the few other activities koalas will spend their precious energy on is rape. Despite being seasonal breeders, males seem to either not know or care, and will simply overpower a female regardless of whether she is ovulating. If she fights back, he may drag them both out of the tree, which brings us full circle back to the brain: Koalas have a higher than average quantity of cerebrospinal fluid in their brains. This is to protect their brains from injury... should they fall from a tree. An animal so thick it has its own little built in special ed helmet. I fucking hate them.

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HtownHorn

HtownHorn 15231

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1 minute ago, Vertigo said:

I'll grant you that. Interestingly, Herman made a good hire in Hand when forced to go outside of his circle last season. Who knows, maybe Herman can actually hire the right people when he is objectively evaluating people for the job. We know he is a very good evaluator of recruiting talent, I would imagine he could be a pretty good evaluator of coaches that he doesn't have personal relationships with if he were to use the same process. 

Hand shouldn't be put in the good hire category. That he was better than Warehime isn't a standard that leads to this conclusion. The OL was awful for the back half of the schedule.

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Bevo14

Bevo14 8469

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Posted (edited)
8 minutes ago, Vertigo said:

I'll grant you that. Interestingly, Herman made a good hire in Hand when forced to go outside of his circle last season. Who knows, maybe Herman can actually hire the right people when he is objectively evaluating people for the job. We know he is a very good evaluator of recruiting talent, I would imagine he could be a pretty good evaluator of coaches that he doesn't have personal relationships with if he were to use the same process. 

Herman does certain things well enough to make me believe he can succeed here in the long run. He has a good big picture view of the program and how to take advantage of the resources available. His first staff was a rushed misfire but we'll see what happens next.

Edited by Bevo14
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closetohumping

closetohumping 17825

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20 minutes ago, HtownHorn said:

Now that would be interesting. Odom and Ash as CoDC's like Ash did it at OSU with Fickell, and Walters is the other DB coach. Then you would look to bring in another DL coach with Giles.

Odom, Ash, Giles, Okam/Haley, Walters would be a salty defensive staff.

You got one dl coach per lineman

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Skipper

Skipper 6412

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16 minutes ago, UncleBuck said:

Could be the "official" news Harrell was waiting on before committing to returning/leaving

I haven't seen anything saying that he is, but if he happens to be on the radar for FAU or Memphis he'll hold out for those.  Or if he thinks a coach that will take those jobs will create an opening he'll wait.   Waiting out HC jobs before declaring one way or the other is really the only thing that makes any sense.

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UncleBuck

UncleBuck 6455

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Just now, Skipper said:

I haven't seen anything saying that he is, but if he happens to be on the radar for FAU or Memphis he'll hold out for those.  Or if he thinks a coach that will take those jobs will create an opening he'll wait.   Waiting out HC jobs before declaring one way or the other is really the only thing that makes any sense.

Hmm, could be.  I just know UTSA and UNLV were the two HC jobs he had interviewed for, and those are now officially closed. Haven't heard him linked to the other two, but you're right.

As for waiting for one of those jobs to open up an OC position once they've settled on their new HC, I still imagine he'd shoot higher than those (USC/UT).

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Skipper

Skipper 6412

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1 minute ago, UncleBuck said:

Hmm, could be.  I just know UTSA and UNLV were the two HC jobs he had interviewed for, and those are now officially closed. Haven't heard him linked to the other two, but you're right.

As for waiting for one of those jobs to open up an OC position once they've settled on their new HC, I still imagine he'd shoot higher than those (USC/UT).

I meant that if he hears through his agent circles that a current HC may take one of those jobs, and he's interested in that job opening, he may hold up for that opening.  But doesn't seem like there will be many more dominoes to fall at this point.

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closetohumping

closetohumping 17825

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16 minutes ago, Skipper said:

I haven't seen anything saying that he is, but if he happens to be on the radar for FAU or Memphis he'll hold out for those.  Or if he thinks a coach that will take those jobs will create an opening he'll wait.   Waiting out HC jobs before declaring one way or the other is really the only thing that makes any sense.

I doubt he’s established enough to land one of those 

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