Paris zoo unveils the "blob", an organism with no brain but (almost) 720 sexes

[clapclapclap 9,000]

There's a fungus among us?

https://www.reuters.com/article/us-france-zoo-blob/paris-zoo-unveils-the-blob-an-organism-with-no-brain-but-720-sexes-idUSKBN1WV2AD

Spoiler

PARIS (Reuters) - A Paris zoo showcased a mysterious new organism on Wednesday, dubbed the “blob”, a yellowish unicellular small living being which looks like a fungus but acts like an animal.

This newest exhibit of the Paris Zoological Park, which goes on display to the public on Saturday, has no mouth, no stomach, no eyes, yet it can detect food and digest it.

The blob also has almost 720 sexes, can move without legs or wings and heals itself in two minutes if cut in half.

“The blob is a living being which belongs to one of nature’s mysteries”, said Bruno David, director of the Paris Museum of Natural History, of which the Zoological Park is part.

“It surprises us because it has no brain but is able to learn (...) and if you merge two blobs, the one that has learned will transmit its knowledge to the other,” David added.

The blob was named after a 1958 science-fiction horror B-movie, starring a young Steve McQueen, in which an alien life form - The Blob - consumes everything in its path in a small Pennsylvania town.

“We know for sure it is not a plant but we don’t really if it’s an animal or a fungus,” said David.

“It behaves very surprisingly for something that looks like a mushroom (...) it has the behavior of an animal, it is able to learn.”

 

Edited October 17, 2019 by clapclapclap

[workswithseed 2,204]

Also how does it have so much sex? It must not be married.

[Samson's Wig 3,230]

It's like staring at humanity's eventual demise, and while it can't stare back it knows someday it's coming for us. 

[BabaYaga 15,624]

Bet that's super exciting to watch.  It sit there.  Doing nothing....

[4th and 5 5,005]

Like everyone else on surly

[InkaUtexas 26,869]

Aggy? 

[crash_davis 23,470]

aggy is evolving?

['stache 22,131]

"The blob also has almost 720 sexes"

What does this even mean? Seriously, I guess i'm not "woke" on fungi gender identification.

[Longhornfan1024 1,707]

Everything they just described also describes an alien being that will eventually take over the world and end humanity.  Along with this and AI robots, has not one scientist seen a fucking sci fi movie?  Kill it with fire.

[Blotto 24,016]

5 minutes ago, 'stache said:

"The blob also has almost 720 sexes"

What does this even mean? Seriously, I guess i'm not "woke" on fungi gender identification.

Let's get you started at a remedial level

[Apep 645]

Here is a better article. It's just a type of slime mould.

[Brian Fantana 6,864]

14 minutes ago, 'stache said:

"The blob also has almost 720 sexes"

What does this even mean? Seriously, I guess i'm not "woke" on fungi gender identification.

The short answer is each cell has something like 3 different sets of genes with 16 variations apiece that all have to line up for one cell to mingle with another. 720 sexes is just an analogy.

Edit: Also it's not a fungus

Edited October 17, 2019 by Brian Fantana

[El Diablo 4,232]

14 minutes ago, 'stache said:

"The blob also has almost 720 sexes"

What does this even mean? Seriously, I guess i'm not "woke" on fungi gender identification.

It means more pron.

[Trey3216 15,452]

Egon would be enthralled 

[bernorange 8,385]

3 minutes ago, Apep said:

... It's just a type of slime mould.

[NeverMarryAStripper 22,294]

Just keep it out of the ice machine

[futureman 22,698]

47 minutes ago, Brian Fantana said:

The short answer is each cell has something like 3 different sets of genes with 16 variations apiece that all have to line up for one cell to mingle with another. 720 sexes is just an analogy.

Edit: Also it's not a fungus

 

1 hour ago, clapclapclap said:

PARIS (Reuters) - A Paris zoo showcased a mysterious new organism on Wednesday, dubbed the “blob”, a yellowish unicellular small living being which looks like a fungus but acts like an animal.

 

[Brian Fantana 6,864]

7 minutes ago, futureman said:

 

 

[clapclapclap 9,000]

"Use the cocktail stick!" (720 different ways)

[smuggs 9,397]

1 hour ago, Apep said:

It's just a type of slime mould.

Like Jade's chili.

[futureman 22,698]

29 minutes ago, Brian Fantana said:

don’t feel bad.

[Fuck Tim Beck 3,904]

They are late to the party. We discovered fitlump years ago 

[Pato del Muerto 53,474]

Did they name it Lena McDunhamface?

[Trey3216 15,452]

7 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Did they name it Lena McDunhamface?

Nah.  Melissa McMoldy 

[crash_davis 23,470]

2 hours ago, Brian Fantana said:

The short answer is each cell has something like 3 different sets of genes with 16 variations apiece that all have to line up for one cell to mingle with another. 720 sexes is just an analogy.

Edit: Also it's not a fungus

[El Diablo 4,232]

I don't care what it's name is, someone will stick their dick in that.

[TKthunder2 5,059]

1 hour ago, El Diablo said:

I don't care what it's name is, someone will stick their dick in that.

Tuck the sack back and slap a little rouge on it...

Edited October 17, 2019 by TKthunder2

[Loco 3,754]

congrats on your mom's exhibit

[RPM 26,623]

3 hours ago, Brian Fantana said:

The short answer is each cell has something like 3 different sets of genes with 16 variations apiece that all have to line up for one cell to mingle with another. 

Doesn't care, had sex

[The University 852]

19 hours ago, 'stache said:

"The blob also has almost 720 sexes"

What does this even mean? Seriously, I guess i'm not "woke" on fungi gender identification.

[Beau Vine 55,863]

I for one welcome our new blob overlords!

[Continental Op 3,934]

Here is a better article. It's just a type of slime mould.

Hey you leave Husker Du out of this.

[clapclapclap 9,000]

the "blob", an organism with no brain but (almost) 720 sexes

 

Edited October 18, 2019 by clapclapclap

[Grade of D as in David 13,255]

On 10/17/2019 at 12:38 PM, Longhornfan1024 said:

Everything they just described also describes an alien being that will eventually take over the world and end humanity.  Along with this and AI robots, has not one scientist seen a fucking sci fi movie?  Kill it with fire.

Use the ai robots to fight the aliens.

 

[RDCanecutter 26,881]

Paris zoo unveils the "blob", an organism with no brain but (almost) 720 sexes

aka clientele of any Euro club playing Kylie Minogue.

[High Plains Drifter 11,187]

On 10/17/2019 at 12:32 PM, 'stache said:

"The blob also has almost 720 sexes"

What does this even mean? Seriously, I guess i'm not "woke" on fungi gender identification.

 

 Lets see:

1) male, female, neither, both, other

2) cis, trans

3) queer, straight, bi, asexual, curious, neutered,

pick one of each, thats 5 x 2 x 6 = 60 permutations.

 

That's all I got. Somebody else needs to come up with the other 660 possibilities.

 

[High Plains Drifter 11,187]

 

What do you call a mindless blob with 720 sexes?

 

 

A fungi to be with!

['stache 22,131]

7 minutes ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

 Lets see:

1) male, female, neither, both, other

2) cis, trans

3) queer, straight, bi, asexual, curious, neutered,

pick one of each, thats 5 x 2 x 6 = 60 permutations.

 

That's all I got. Somebody else needs to come up with the other 660 possibilities.

 

Incel? 659 to go.

[EMAWesome 101]

Paris zoo unveils the "blob", an organism with no brain but (almost) 720 sexes

Scientific name Democratus Partius Currentus.

[Bolero88 286]

1 hour ago, EMAWesome said:

Paris zoo unveils the "blob", an organism with no brain but (almost) 720 sexes

Scientific name Democratus Partius Currentus.

Wow, you're so smart

[Prepuce of Doom 21,285]

2 hours ago, EMAWesome said:

Paris zoo unveils the "blob", an organism with no brain but (almost) 720 sexes

Scientific name Democratus Partius Currentus.

Poop in your pants.