Urban Meyer or bust

[Gut Wagon 8,065]

9 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

She’s dead too?!

https://larrybrownsports.com/wag/jose-lima-ex-wife-melissa-engaged-roberto-clemente-jr/156343

[Foosters 17,849]

7 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

This is what happens when you have a professional running the show.

[BrickTop 476]

Further research

Big ole RATS

[Rip76 4,925]

Just now, Foosters said:

This fuck

[Bevo Num1 1,011]

CDC et al are sure running a much tighter ship than in the past. It is remarkable that so little has come out in the last day or two.

This probably explains why that betting line opened with Herman +100. Very few people know what's going on.

[Dr. Teeth 5,844]

17 minutes ago, Mantis Toboggan, MD said:

CDC et al are sure running a much tighter ship than in the past. It is remarkable that so little has come out in the last day or two.

What if nothing is actually happening?

[Mantis Toboggan, MD 1,501]

This probably explains why that betting line opened with Herman +100. Very few people know what's going on.

There was and is no betting line. Some content monkeys at CBS sports line published those odds. It isn’t real action.

[elguapo 4,586]

32 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

Someone should count how many times (and it’s wrong which makes it funny) someone types about the buyout changing drastically on December 1. It’s not a thing but is also seemingly mentioned every page by at least two or three mostly paste eaters. 

I read the buyout drops at precisely 43 seconds after 11:11pm (mountain time)

[dcar00 14,181]

55 minutes ago, JesusSweatDuck said:

Correct, that's why I said it is called Whiskey only because Jack Daniels wanted it that way

In college you order Bourbon and Coke-you get Beam.  You have to order Jack and Coke to get Jack.  no one orders Whiskey and Coke.

[Rhinotx 499]

2 minutes ago, Dr. Teeth said:

What if nothing is actually happening?

Unpossible

[Surly Bevo 24,908]

41 minutes ago, Gil Bang said:

Jose Lima's wife, Melissa

IT'S LIMA TIME!

[MonkeyDoughnut 10,232]

22 minutes ago, Mantis Toboggan, MD said:

CDC et al are sure running a much tighter ship than in the past. It is remarkable that so little has come out in the last day or two.

[Bevo 13,575]

4 minutes ago, dcar00 said:

In college you order Bourbon and Coke-you get Beam.  You have to order Jack and Coke to get Jack.  no one orders Whiskey and Coke.

Crown and Coke

[TexasEd 8,066]

4 minutes ago, dcar00 said:

In college you order Bourbon and Coke-you get Beam.  You have to order Jack and Coke to get Jack.  no one orders Whiskey and Coke.

Jim Beam >>> Jack Daniels

[ShowmeyourTDs 1,141]

I spent the afternoon doing work ... what did I miss?

[Covri 6,247]

Just now, ShowmeyourTDs said:

I spent the afternoon doing work ... what did I miss?

[PatSolitanojr 518]

1 minute ago, ShowmeyourTDs said:

I spent the afternoon doing work ... what did I miss?

The secret aircraft is making promising moves tomorrow.

[nnm 36,360]

1 minute ago, ShowmeyourTDs said:

I spent the afternoon doing work ... what did I miss?

Want to know how we know you’re not Tom Herman?

[El Squared 1,802]

3 hours ago, hornian said:

Well he and Chris Simms had matching butt tattoos or something if IIRC, so there's that. 

From Jon Waters: "Lust in the Dust"

[tx ind 7,011]

31 minutes ago, TejasPedro said:

Best fries evah. 

Hot dogs almost perfect, just needs Cheetos 

[PassiveAggressiveCoach 118]

If that flight plan adds Austin as it final stop tomorrow night many of you are going to jizz. 

[Knighthawk 284]

Maybe Urban is playing a really long game to bring Texas to its knees as payback for getting let go by OSU a couple years ago.   Perhaps in his mind, TH and a complicit Texas took him down to protect recruiting turf.  
 

‘Make the offer.  I’m all in.’   Rumors circulate.     Recruiting nose dives as the season goes south.   TH is a dead man walking.  Players opt out.  Last minute, ‘you know that damn cyst is flaring up and I can’t sign the deal.  Doctors orders.  Really appreciate the offer and good luck to your program.’   
 

And now we’re stuck with a crippled Tom with shit recruits and the BMDs pull the conditional money for the buy out - no UM, no buyout.  
 

Or maybe I’m wrong.  

[brown water 3,777]

40 minutes ago, EZ$ said:

Lima Time as interim HC?  

Interred HC 

[deech 2,274]

2 minutes ago, Knighthawk said:

Maybe Urban is playing a really long game to bring Texas to its knees as payback for getting let go by OSU a couple years ago.   Perhaps in his mind, TH and a complicit Texas took him down to protect recruiting turf.  
 

‘Make the offer.  I’m all in.’   Rumors circulate.     Recruiting nose dives as the season goes south.   TH is a dead man walking.  Players opt out.  Last minute, ‘you know that damn cyst is flaring up and I can’t sign the deal.  Doctors orders.  Really appreciate the offer and good luck to your program.’   
 

And now we’re stuck with a crippled Tom with shit recruits and the BMDs pull the conditional money for the buy out - no UM, no buyout.  
 

Or maybe I’m wrong.  

So you are saying their master plan is to do this as an attempt to sabotage our recruiting efforts?  They will be more than surprised to find out......the TCU and OU results have already done enough.

Edited December 1, 2020 by deech

[TexMexBuddha 987]

 

1 hour ago, JFKFC said:

I was at Nasty's back in the day, shooting pool with Peter Gardere's neighbor. He whipped out a one-hitter that had to be from outer space, or the future...maybe both. I was already in no condition to "herb up," because the bartender at Nasty's sometimes wouldn't stir the grain alcohol into the pitcher of margaritas. it would mostly just sit on the top. If that happened, and you poured yourself the first drink, it was a hammer. That happened to me twice that night. There was also an Asian girl there who kept screaming at me. Apparently, freshman year, I stood up her friend that I was supposed to have taken to a Cult concert. But she doesn't matter. Anywho, I was a wreck. I was close to hallucinating, and needed some air. They had a small patio, and I went out there to collect myself.

One of my friends followed me out, and was drunk rambling about a rode trip to Nuevo Laredo for quasi-legal purposes. Then, a voice from the corner of the patio said, "It's a long road to Laredo." I almost jumped out of my skin. I didn't know anyone else was there. He pulled back the hoodie that was covering his head. It was a white guy with a buzz cut, close to my age. He walked up to me, with a vibe of quiet confidence, and said, "Years from now, when you think the Longhorn football program is dead, I will return. The entire university will receive total consciousness." 

I looked down at the table to grab my drink, looked back at him, and he was gone. I was messed up, so I can't be certain, but I am pretty sure that man was Butch Jones. 

Nasty's and Draught Haus were the only places that let us in as high school juniors on the regular. Cheap Shiner and Everclear margarita pitchers. Hung out there with UT LAX on occasion.

Edited December 1, 2020 by TexMexBuddha

[40acredropout 2,902]

Trying to envision a twist in the plot as dramatic as Tennessee outing their AD in the middle of their search after he tried to hire Leach.

[Gut Wagon 8,065]

4 minutes ago, PassiveAggressiveCoach said:

If that flight plan adds Austin as it final stop tomorrow night many of you are going to CUM. 

Amended

[Gut Wagon 8,065]

nm

Edited December 1, 2020 by Gut Wagon

[Knighthawk 284]

2 minutes ago, deech said:

So you are saying their master plan is to do this as an attempt to sabotage our recruiting efforts?  They will be more than surprised to find out......the TCU and OU results have already done enough.

Well that and get a big raise out of fox in the process and bring down Texas for the next 10 years.  

[El Squared 1,802]

2 hours ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

Is that anything like the Cleveland Steamer? 

I thought a "Cleveland Steamer" was a dump you took outside  during cold weather next to Lake Erie.

[dcar00 14,181]

8 minutes ago, PassiveAggressiveCoach said:

If that flight plan adds Austin as it final stop tomorrow night many of you are going to jizz. 

They will switch planes.  Herman needs to have his head on s swivel for a man with an umbrella as he is walking over the 21st bridge at Waller Creek though.

[NoctambulantBrobdingnagian 530]

2 hours ago, Eggo said:

There's nothing in the bourbon regulations that prevents charcoal filtering. 

I expect this will eventually be settled by a duel.  Hopefully, no fences will be destroyed.

[Happy Gilmore 1,001]

12 minutes ago, Knighthawk said:

Maybe Urban is playing a really long game to bring Texas to its knees as payback for getting let go by OSU a couple years ago.   Perhaps in his mind, TH and a complicit Texas took him down to protect recruiting turf.  
 

‘Make the offer.  I’m all in.’   Rumors circulate.     Recruiting nose dives as the season goes south.   TH is a dead man walking.  Players opt out.  Last minute, ‘you know that damn cyst is flaring up and I can’t sign the deal.  Doctors orders.  Really appreciate the offer and good luck to your program.’   
 

And now we’re stuck with a crippled Tom with shit recruits and the BMDs pull the conditional money for the buy out - no UM, no buyout.  
 

Or maybe I’m wrong.  

 

7 minutes ago, Knighthawk said:

Well that and get a big raise out of fox in the process and bring down Texas for the next 10 years.  

Stop Posting

[closetojumping 62,600]

2 hours ago, GRHorn said:

So what’s your plane doing today CTJ?

In the hangar. Tomorrow, we're taking a round trip around the greater midwest. 

2 hours ago, JesusSweatDuck said:

Because Jack Daniels didn't want it to be.  There's no technical reason for it not to be but it isn't.  It is also trash.  Gentlemen Jack isn't bad but still isn't good.

All of you people howling about Jack Daniels probably turn to Bud Light once you're deep into the cups. If I've had a few Knob Creek rye manhattans or some such and don't feel like making another and I'm watching sports, or I'm at a bar (remember those?) bullshitting with buddies or business partners and past a couple of martinis or manhattans, give me a fucking Jack & Coke, or 10. Fucking @SydneyCarton is a charlatan if he doesn't freely admit that our go-to on the golf course is exactly a Jack & Coke/Diet Coke. 

Getting all hoity-toity with the booze and fast food on this thread has been bizarre to watch. This site is loaded to the brim with poors, degenerates, hustlers, hillbillies, and assclowns. I'm guessing anything beyond the well rotguts at the local Sizzler has most of you priced out of your comfort zone. Also, @Newy25 doth protest too much. I'm guessing he was backing his truck up to the window at McDonald's on a daily basis for years before having a heart attack at 38, a stomach band put in at 42, popped that at 43, and then got religion and lost the weight after the gastro bypass at 45 when the doctor warned him that he was at "the end of the line".

2 hours ago, Hagbard Celine said:

A cigar timeshare on a jetlinx contract is "an alum's plane".

Listen, I hope you're right. All I'm passing on is that this is not the jet we're looking for, apparently. Fuck it, maybe JetLinx has a big swinging dick from UT running shit there and it's all the same. 

2 hours ago, Eggo said:

Urban Meyer as HC.

Coach Boom as DC. 

Mike Leach as OC.

Current buzz out there is that Elko could be a legit HC candidate this offseason and Muschamp takes the DC gig at ATM. He and Jimbo are friends and aggies have short memories once they're validated by someone choosing to work for them who they'd previously hated. 

[TexasEd 8,066]

14 minutes ago, Knighthawk said:

Maybe Urban is playing a really long game to bring Texas to its knees as payback for getting let go by OSU a couple years ago.   Perhaps in his mind, TH and a complicit Texas took him down to protect recruiting turf.  
 

‘Make the offer.  I’m all in.’   Rumors circulate.     Recruiting nose dives as the season goes south.   TH is a dead man walking.  Players opt out.  Last minute, ‘you know that damn cyst is flaring up and I can’t sign the deal.  Doctors orders.  Really appreciate the offer and good luck to your program.’   
 

And now we’re stuck with a crippled Tom with shit recruits and the BMDs pull the conditional money for the buy out - no UM, no buyout.  
 

Or maybe I’m wrong.  

[JesusSweatDuck 17,781]

8 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

All of you people howling about Jack Daniels probably turn to Bud Light once you're deep into the cups. If I've had a few Knob Creek rye manhattans or some such and don't feel like making another and I'm watching sports, or I'm at a bar (remember those?) bullshitting with buddies or business partners and past a couple of martinis or manhattans, give me a fucking Jack & Coke, or 10. Fucking @SydneyCarton is a charlatan if he doesn't freely admit that our go-to on the golf course is exactly a Jack & Coke/Diet Coke.

Currently consuming a Mitchter's Small Batch Bourbon because it's been one of those days.

 

Also, to be fair, if you're going to mix it with coke you better use shit like Jack or Jim Beam

Edited December 1, 2020 by JesusSweatDuck
coke

[senorfussybutt 32]

Ok you surly bastards... there's like 30 more pages since I last checked. And my phone didn't blow up with anything... And I'm not going to read all 30 pages.

 

Anything interesting happen since about, oh, 11:30pm last night?

[CenTex Hill Billy 146]

18 minutes ago, Knighthawk said:

Maybe Urban is playing a really long game to bring Texas to its knees as payback for getting let go by OSU a couple years ago.   Perhaps in his mind, TH and a complicit Texas took him down to protect recruiting turf.  
 

‘Make the offer.  I’m all in.’   Rumors circulate.     Recruiting nose dives as the season goes south.   TH is a dead man walking.  Players opt out.  Last minute, ‘you know that damn cyst is flaring up and I can’t sign the deal.  Doctors orders.  Really appreciate the offer and good luck to your program.’   
 

And now we’re stuck with a crippled Tom with shit recruits and the BMDs pull the conditional money for the buy out - no UM, no buyout.  
 

Or maybe I’m wrong.  

Recruiting died before Urban was even mentioned.

[936horn 910]

1 minute ago, senorfussybutt said:

Ok you surly bastards... there's like 30 more pages since I last checked. And my phone didn't blow up with anything... And I'm not going to read all 30 pages.

 

Anything interesting happen since about, oh, 11:30pm last night?

No

[fatheryeet 1,532]

1 minute ago, senorfussybutt said:

Ok you surly bastards... there's like 30 more pages since I last checked. And my phone didn't blow up with anything... And I'm not going to read all 30 pages.

 

Anything interesting happen since about, oh, 11:30pm last night?

That plane that landed in Austin last night? Flying to Columbus OH tomorrow, after a quick stop in Pittsburgh, before stopping in Cincy

[Mantis Toboggan, MD 1,501]

Ok you surly bastards... there's like 30 more pages since I last checked. And my phone didn't blow up with anything... And I'm not going to read all 30 pages.
 
Anything interesting happen since about, oh, 11:30pm last night?

Yeah. Some weirdo eats miracle whip.

[senorfussybutt 32]

5 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

In the hangar. Tomorrow, we're taking a round trip around the greater midwest. 

All of you people howling about Jack Daniels probably turn to Bud Light once you're deep into the cups. If I've had a few Knob Creek rye manhattans or some such and don't feel like making another and I'm watching sports, or I'm at a bar (remember those?) bullshitting with buddies or business partners and past a couple of martinis or manhattans, give me a fucking Jack & Coke, or 10. Fucking @SydneyCarton is a charlatan if he doesn't freely admit that our go-to on the golf course is exactly a Jack & Coke/Diet Coke. 

Getting all hoity-toity with the booze and fast food on this thread has been bizarre to watch. This site is loaded to the brim with poors, degenerates, hustlers, hillbillies, and assclowns. I'm guessing anything beyond the well rotguts at the local Sizzler has most of you priced out of your comfort zone. Also, @Newy25 doth protest too much. I'm guessing he was backing his truck up to the window at McDonald's on a daily basis for years before having a heart attack at 38, a stomach band put in at 42, popped that at 43, and then got religion and lost the weight after the gastro bypass at 45 when the doctor warned him that he was at "the end of the line".

Listen, I hope you're right. All I'm passing on is that this is not the jet we're looking for, apparently. Fuck it, maybe JetLinx has a big swinging dick from UT running shit there and it's all the same. 

Current buzz out there is that Elko could be a legit HC candidate this offseason and Muschamp takes the DC gig at ATM. He and Jimbo are friends and aggies have short memories once they're validated by someone choosing to work for them who they'd previously hated. 

Why in the everloving fuck would you drink Jack when you could drink Buffalo Trace for the same price?

[deech 2,274]

1 minute ago, senorfussybutt said:

Ok you surly bastards... there's like 30 more pages since I last checked. And my phone didn't blow up with anything... And I'm not going to read all 30 pages.

 

Anything interesting happen since about, oh, 11:30pm last night?

 

 

Nothing.

[The Beast 585]

51 minutes ago, BurntOrange&White said:

I don't agree that 2022 recruiting would be suboptimal, there is always the new coach bump. But I am curious if we have a QB on the roster now that can win a BIG12 championship in 2021. Or, are we thinking 2023 is the break out year?

[JesusSweatDuck 17,781]

2 minutes ago, senorfussybutt said:

Ok you surly bastards... there's like 30 more pages since I last checked. And my phone didn't blow up with anything... And I'm not going to read all 30 pages.

 

Anything interesting happen since about, oh, 11:30pm last night?

Burgers, Bourbon, Whiskey, Whisky, Newsy doesn't like fast food, and there's a plane that we're tracking.

[satyanash 14,481]

1 hour ago, ztejas said:

Years from now I'm going to be locked in an asylum somewhere, rocking back in forth in a padded room wearing a straight-jacket, repeatedly muttering: "Buyout comes down at midnight. Just wait til midnight. Buyout comes down!"

My beautiful wife - hair now grayed from watching me waste away - with our kids beside her will dab a tear away as she says under her breath but loud enough for all to hear, "If only that no good sum bitch Chris Del Conte had've hired Urban Meyer. We'd be a proper family again!"

[UncleBuck 6,453]

Ok you surly bastards... there's like 30 more pages since I last checked. And my phone didn't blow up with anything... And I'm not going to read all 30 pages.
 
Anything interesting happen since about, oh, 11:30pm last night?

Just a buncha glizzing and whatnot.

[TexasEd 8,066]

3 minutes ago, senorfussybutt said:

Ok you surly bastards... there's like 30 more pages since I last checked. And my phone didn't blow up with anything... And I'm not going to read all 30 pages.

 

Anything interesting happen since about, oh, 11:30pm last night?

Bourbon is Whiskey, Scotch is Whisky, Jack Daniels is not Bourbon.

All caught up. (Going to pour myself a Whisky)

[senorfussybutt 32]

1 minute ago, satyanash said:

I got a sensible chuckle out of this one.

[Rimbo 25,919]

37 minutes ago, Foosters said:

We said a professional. Not this clown.

33 minutes ago, Dr. Teeth said:

What if nothing is actually happening?

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. 

3 minutes ago, senorfussybutt said:

Ok you surly bastards... there's like 30 more pages since I last checked. And my phone didn't blow up with anything... And I'm not going to read all 30 pages.

 

Anything interesting happen since about, oh, 11:30pm last night?

Naw.