Official 2019 bitch about family/holiday drama thread

[Bullneck 19126]

7 hours ago, Penelope said:

Since my ex and I split up this last year, I’m enjoying my first Aggie Free Thanksgiving  in six years (his whole family went to A&M). I’m opening up the bar and spending my day serving booze. 

Is this just plain Penelope or Penelope Witherspoon?

[Bullneck 19126]

6 hours ago, BradInATX said:

I swear to fuck I'm negging every post on this thread that has the word "pie" in it from here out. This isn't the god damned Martha Stewart thread, this is where we laugh and cry about each other's fucked up families.

 

 

 

 

From the NYT:

Quote

PORT NECHES, Texas — It was a Thanksgiving of pies abandoned at homes that had been left in a hurry, turkey eaten in hotel rooms, and naps on cots handed out by Red Cross volunteers.

Doug Hinson had planned to be at his son’s house, gathered with his family. But that was before he and most everyone else in Port Neches, Texas, were jolted awake early Wednesday by a blast at the Texas Petroleum Chemical plant that sent flames shooting into the sky, punched out windows of nearby homes and injured eight people.

He was at work on Wednesday afternoon, a few miles away, when he felt the second explosion. “I got home and said, ‘Let’s go,’” he said, sitting outside an arena in Beaumont that had taken in some of the tens of thousands of people who had been displaced because of the explosions and the fire that still burned at the plant on Thursday.

 

[TrashMaster G 17558]

4 hours ago, GhostOfTomJoad said:

You try this at my house & your phone is getting locked in the garage. Same with playing video games with the sound not muted. That's shit I just don't tolerate.

It drives me absolutely nuts when people do that shit in public, particularly in restaurants.  It astounds me that restaurants don't police that shit.

Makes me ragey 100% of the time. My kids know not to do that in my presence as I will take their phones away, pronto.

[PenelopeWitherspoon 19103]

15 minutes ago, Bullneck said:

Is this just plain Penelope or Penelope Witherspoon?

Not me.  I don't own a bar, live in NYC now, and am currently in Greece at a conference.  So no family drama at all.

[TrashMaster G 17558]

Just now, PenelopeWitherspoon said:

Not me.  I don't own a bar, live in NYC now, and am currently in Greece at a conference.  So no family drama at all.

Greece, huh?  Hmmm....

[CycleTex87 2970]

4 hours ago, SimonBolivar said:

Update:

Arrived after a 30 minute drive to go roughly 10 miles due to construction where we then waited from 10:50 to 12:00 in line to get our cafeteria food. I've never seen a worse spectacle of humanity.

 

 

1.5 hour at this point for these people

 

 

It smelled as bad as it looks in there.

 

[CR] Sure, wear your Trump hat to Thanksgiving [/CR]

 

Shit ton of Aggies everywhere really completed the whole deal.

 

 

If God turns out to be real this is a very good sample of what my eternity will look like near the Lake of Fire.

 

 

I was through that intersection yesterday, and it is indeed a shit show.  And have eaten at that Lubes in times past. Can’t conceive of having thanksgiving dinner there. 

[Bullneck 19126]

6 minutes ago, PenelopeWitherspoon said:

Not me.  I don't own a bar, live in NYC now, and am currently in Greece at a conference.  So no family drama at all.

Are you up early or up late?

[tbone_ 14128]

Are you up early or up late?

Did you mean this for her PM?

[Buzzrock 14922]

Are the things in the upper left sugar cookies that are decorated into turkeys?  If so, that’s where I am heading first, then for a small slice of each one of those pecan pies so that I can determine the winner. 

Yes. Made by children.

[Buzzrock 14922]

Is this before or after the Arsenal v. Eintrach match?  
(There's really no reason for me to bring this up other than to be a dick.  Now you can bitch about that 

Well played

[PenelopeWitherspoon 19103]

1 hour ago, Bullneck said:

Are you up early or up late?

Late.  Not sleepy at all and have to be at the conference at 9:15 AM.  Sigh.  This thread has been highly entertaining.

1 hour ago, TrashMaster G said:

Greece, huh?  Hmmm....

Athens.  The Platts Mediterranean Bunker Fuels Conference.

[UpperWestside 6169]

So I had to work on Thanksgiving. I work every year because I work in a restaurant in mid-town Manhattan and Thursday is my normal day to work. I really don't care. Get a bunch of tourists leaving the parade and whatnot. Meet some interesting folks so it makes the day go by nicely.

My girlfriend decided that this year she would have Thanksgiving in the most northeastern part of the Bronx because one of her sisters cannot travel much due to a serious medical condition. She asked me to come after work. I got off at 6 and I tried, but the trip would've taken an hour and a half. Her family is Dominicans and Brazilians and the Dominicans in that family are so freaking loud. Cultural thing from what I can tell. I did not want to go because why the hell do I want to listen to loud people all day only to hear the same thing tonight? 

I told her mother I could not come because by the time I would get there they would be leaving 30 minutes later and she understood and said she would like to cook us breakfast this weekend. Her mother is from Rio and is just a great person. My girlfriend said very little about me skipping this.She is probably pissed, but I worked all day and either she understands or she doesn't. Not trying to be insensitive to her, but working on this day is very draining and I just really want some nice downtime. Her BIL does not like being around most of them and he endorsed me skipping this. I like that guy. 

I instead spent my evening with my dog at home in Astoria and watched a movie and have had peace and quiet. Best Thanksgiving in God knows how long. 

Edited November 29, 2019 by UpperWestside

[Paper_jam 831]

6 hours ago, SimonBolivar said:

Update:

Arrived after a 30 minute drive to go roughly 10 miles due to construction where we then waited from 10:50 to 12:00 in line to get our cafeteria food. I've never seen a worse spectacle of humanity.

 

 

 

After seeing that line for Luby's, I would've taken my chances at the IHOP in the background. Shit, maybe the Valero has some burritos or something...

 

 

[4th&Five 41558]

Drove by ihop in Austin today and it was fucking packed. 

[Al_4_ISU 12464]

Who is it that has the little nephew that likes to talk shit to his mom? Was it Al?

 

Regardless, I’d like to hear an update on what that cunning linguist has said so far today.

 

Funny, I just came here to update.

 

Yesterday, when they were leaving to come to my mom’s, SIL gave him a pair of socks to put on. He wasn’t interested, and after several demands from her to do so he snapped back “SHUT UP (SIL Real name)!”

 

I successfully convinced him I had turned info a zombie and was going to eat his brains. There was a brief moment of sheer horror cross his face before he realized I was not, in fact, a zombie.

[Sbbruin 21858]

No real drama, but my wife got pissed at her SIL (not openly, but vented to me afterwards).  SIL says it’s a tradition in their family to have Vueve Cliquot champagne (sp?).  So she ordered 2 bottles instead of the martini I wanted.  Whatever.  But the bill comes and we split it evenly between the 3 families.  The champagne was $150/bottle.  I had one glass that probably cost me $100.

But now back on the boat in Avalon harbor by myself, (wife and kids got a hotel room) so all is well.

[Telegraph_it 3357]

8 minutes ago, Sbbruin said:

No real drama, but my wife got pissed at her SIL (not openly, but vented to me afterwards).  SIL says it’s a tradition in their family to have Vueve Cliquot champagne (sp?).  So she ordered 2 bottles instead of the martini I wanted.  Whatever.  But the bill comes and we split it evenly between the 3 families.  The champagne was $150/bottle.  I had one glass that probably cost me $100.

But now back on the boat in Avalon harbor by myself, (wife and kids got a hotel room) so all is well.

That would make me rage a little. Amex has an option now to split a charge from their app. I’d be tempted to send a request $66 or so. But I’m a passive aggressive asshole sometimes. 

[ImGolfn 77]

Some of you guys need to go world star on these shenanigans and post videos for our entertainment 

[Sbbruin 21858]

28 minutes ago, Telegraph_it said:

That would make me rage a little. Amex has an option now to split a charge from their app. I’d be tempted to send a request $66 or so. But I’m a passive aggressive asshole sometimes. 

It’s not the money so much as if I had some bullshit tradition I was thrusting on others, I wouldn’t blink about paying for that.  But women are often clueless about such things.  At least she had her brother and his family out from Louisiana and his wife was is so smoking hot I ogled her all night.  And she’s really cool too.  

[workswithseed 2112]

4 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

Greece, huh?  Hmmm....

Hey, she's gotta eat, and will sell her body for a sandwich.

[PenelopeWitherspoon 19103]

Hey, she's gotta eat, and will sell her body for a sandwich.

Missing that reference.

[ChiTownDoc 21154]

I’ll share our details tomorrow but just had to let Bolivar know the wife and I laughed ourselves to tears seeing those pics.  Hope you survived, my man.  JFC...amazing

[El Diablo 4232]

1 hour ago, Sbbruin said:

It’s not the money so much as if I had some bullshit tradition I was thrusting on others, I wouldn’t blink about paying for that.  But women are often clueless about such things.  At least she had her brother and his family out from Louisiana and his wife was is so smoking hot I ogled her all night.  And she’s really cool too.  

I've refreshed the page a couple of times now and still nope, pics not loading.

[ImissWallyPryor 9046]

7 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

Are the things in the upper left sugar cookies that are decorated into turkeys?  If so, that’s where I am heading first, then for a small slice of each one of those pecan pies so that I can determine the winner. 

It’s no coincidence that only one that’s been cut into is also the only one that isn’t a Marie Calendar’s frozen pie.  But, even that one is a frozen crust. 

Edited November 29, 2019 by ImissWallyPryor

[workswithseed 2112]

59 minutes ago, PenelopeWitherspoon said:

2 hours ago, workswithseed said:

Hey, she's gotta eat, and will sell her body for a sandwich.

Missing that reference.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/young-greek-women-selling-sex-for-the-price-of-a-sandwich-new-study-shows/2015/11/27/c469695e-94d9-11e5-b5e4-279b4501e8a6_story.html

[RollLeft 5045]

11 hours ago, SimonBolivar said:

Update:

Arrived after a 30 minute drive to go roughly 10 miles due to construction where we then waited from 10:50 to 12:00 in line to get our cafeteria food. I've never seen a worse spectacle of humanity.

 

 

1.5 hour at this point for these people

 

 

It smelled as bad as it looks in there.

 

[CR] Sure, wear your Trump hat to Thanksgiving [/CR]

 

Shit ton of Aggies everywhere really completed the whole deal.

 

 

If God turns out to be real this is a very good sample of what my eternity will look like near the Lake of Fire.

 

 

[PenelopeWitherspoon 19103]

https://www.washingtonpost.com/world/young-greek-women-selling-sex-for-the-price-of-a-sandwich-new-study-shows/2015/11/27/c469695e-94d9-11e5-b5e4-279b4501e8a6_story.html

Ah, the old EPI (European Prostitution Index).

Honestly, had never read.

[mulletpelini 5211]

 

9 hours ago, SimonBolivar said:

It was much like what I'd imagine a shelter in West Virginia would be like right after a Nuclear holocaust.

Would there really be a difference?

Two of my nephews came out, one brought his bf.  Other than that, nothing unusual.

I've known both were gay since they were probably 5.

Edited November 29, 2019 by mulletpelini

[Js1 85372]

30 minutes ago, mulletpelini said:

 

Would there really be a difference?

Two of my nephews came out, one brought his bf.  Other than that, nothing unusual.

I've known both were gay since they were probably 5.

Have the single one pm me please 

[LTbear 4170]

Shaggy, the place where love happens.

[Al_4_ISU 12464]

16 hours ago, SimonBolivar said:

Update:

Arrived after a 30 minute drive to go roughly 10 miles due to construction where we then waited from 10:50 to 12:00 in line to get our cafeteria food. I've never seen a worse spectacle of humanity.

 

 

1.5 hour at this point for these people

 

 

It smelled as bad as it looks in there.

 

[CR] Sure, wear your Trump hat to Thanksgiving [/CR]

 

Shit ton of Aggies everywhere really completed the whole deal.

 

 

If God turns out to be real this is a very good sample of what my eternity will look like near the Lake of Fire.

 

 

You deserve some kind of award for not murdering the entire place.

[Mrs Whiggins 13050]

16 hours ago, SimonBolivar said:

Update:

Arrived after a 30 minute drive to go roughly 10 miles due to construction where we then waited from 10:50 to 12:00 in line to get our cafeteria food. I've never seen a worse spectacle of humanity.

 

 

1.5 hour at this point for these people

 

 

It smelled as bad as it looks in there.

 

[CR] Sure, wear your Trump hat to Thanksgiving [/CR]

 

Shit ton of Aggies everywhere really completed the whole deal.

 

 

If God turns out to be real this is a very good sample of what my eternity will look like near the Lake of Fire.

 

 

 

7 minutes ago, Al_4_ISU said:

You deserve some kind of award for not murdering the entire place.

When I read the first post, I was hoping for a scuffle in line, but everyone just looked...tired and a little wrung out. Can't fight without adrenalin.

[GhostOfTomJoad 9331]

Talked to my dad in Ft Collins yesterday to wish him and his evil wildebeast of a wife a happy thanksgiving. They moved there in '02 and have spent thanksgiving alone every year since. They do us all the great favor of not pretending enough to care about family to invite me, my sisters or their families to their huge home for Thanksgiving so we're not put in the awkward position of having to make excuses not to go. They're pretty miserable, but at least they keep to themselves.

They were spending their thanksgiving weekend as they've done for almost 20 years now: roast a turkey breast & have some sides (eating their feast no later than 1PM), take a nap, & then go shopping. His wife's a professional bargain hunter so there's no way she's missing black Friday opportunities. In reality she's a hoarder & fills their place with useless shit they invariably try to sell in a garage sale in the spring when my dad says for the umpteenth time they're "downsizing." Now, Ft Collins got almost a foot of snow earlier this week & he's been shoveling for much of the past few days which is probably not the best thing for an overweight 74 year old with an artificial shoulder & a knee that needs replacing. I asked him what they were shopping for this year. "Oh, Best Buy has some Blu-rays on sale that we'd like to replace our DVD copies with (!!!!), and we might get a new TV for (evil wildebeast's) craft room down in the basement."

 

[Incredulity 11675]

7 hours ago, Sbbruin said:

It’s not the money so much as if I had some bullshit tradition I was thrusting on others, I wouldn’t blink about paying for that.  But women are often clueless about such things.  At least she had her brother and his family out from Louisiana and his wife was is so smoking hot I ogled her all night.  And she’s really cool too.  

Pics not loading.

[Loco 3752]

10 hours ago, UpperWestside said:

My girlfriend decided that this year she would have Thanksgiving in the most northeastern part of the Bronx because one of her sisters cannot travel much due to a serious medical condition. She asked me to come after work. I got off at 6 and I tried, but the trip would've taken an hour and a half. Her family is Dominicans and Brazilians and the Dominicans in that family are so freaking loud. Cultural thing from what I can tell. I did not want to go because why the hell do I want to listen to loud people all day only to hear the same thing tonight? 

Are the pics showing up for anyone else?

 

After action report....  Ate thanksgiving dinner shoulder to shoulder on a leather couch in an 82* room, I checked the t-stat.   No sushi this year... but there was Corned Beef & Cabbage, it was great, then I spent the night crop dusting.

[Loco 3752]

https://www.usnews.com/news/best-states/florida/articles/2019-11-29/1-dead-2-wounded-in-thanksgiving-strip-club-shooting

WEST PALM BEACH, FLA. (AP) — A Thanksgiving Day fight at a Florida strip club left one man dead and two others injured.

Palm Beach County Sheriff’s deputies found three men with gunshot wounds when they arrived at The Rose Gentlemen’s Club after 3 a.m. Once was pronounced dead at the scene and two others were taken to the hospital.

[Iceman 2715]

All i got is that we had about 15 people at the ( new , 1596 sq ft) house, and when I took the turkey out of the oven, everyone decided to congregate in the kitchen.

"Motherfuckers, I will cut you..." I had hot pans and sharp knives and suddenly it was assholes and elbows.  So i broke wind and cleared it out... Not really, but I did have to ask them to GTFO of the kitchen for 20min.  LOLz

No politics were even mentioned. Had lots of great food and 3 pies/ 1 cake/ homemade truffles that were unbelievable. I wore shorts and still ahad to take breaks and go outside as I would repeatedly volunteer to take the doggies out.  I will never understand the " let's turn the furnace up to 80 with all these people in the house" mentality.

I was so buzzed on great booze that nary a cussword left my mouth during the Cowboy game.  I just sat there and grinned when they kept showing the ginger every 10 seconds.

Fixing to go out and pick up the nasty ass, filthy disgusting cigarette butts from the front walk.  They don't miraculously disappear, you stupid motherfuckers.

[Mrs Whiggins 13050]

8 minutes ago, Iceman said:

Fixing to go out and pick up the nasty ass, filthy disgusting cigarette butts from the front walk.  They don't miraculously disappear, you stupid motherfuckers.

I hate butt trash. If you think of it and know of guest smokers in advance, a clay pot or metal bucket filled with sand and profound and repeated hints can sometimes save you a little work.

[G650 14263]

 

[ocugolf 1214]

My mother decided Thanksgiving was the perfect time to buy new doors. So, they took the old ones and put them in one of their rent houses. Problem is that they didn’t have time to get the new doors stained by the time we got into town. So, there are no doors to any of the bedrooms or more importantly, any of the bathrooms. You haven’t lived until you are awakened by your 87 year old grandfather blowing ass at 3:30 in the morning after two thanksgiving meals.

[G650 14263]

I want a postmortem on @NeverMarryAStripper

[Laxtonto 12090]

God bless you all, you bunch of degenerate bastards. In the last 8 days I’ve been in 8 states and then at my in laws for Thanksgiving with a 4 month pregnant wife with a head cold.

Little holiday drama but I am just sick of people and low level bullshit. You guys keep up the good fight, I’m going to start the arduous journey from Texas to SD

Edited November 29, 2019 by Laxtonto

[Loco 3752]

1 hour ago, Mrs Whiggins said:

I hate butt trash. If you think of it and know of guest smokers in advance, a clay pot or metal bucket filled with sand and profound and repeated hints can sometimes save you a little work.

you know what else works?   Not inviting smokers who are assholes.

[Iceman 2715]

1 minute ago, Loco said:

you know what else works?   Not inviting smokers who are assholes.

Done.  Wife's family is out next year...LOlz.

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

No complaints at all other than, there weren't any Brussels sprouts, or collards last night (that will not happen again, never let your wife handle the to do list for eats). Now it's pregaming before the VT UVA game, and the SIL just dropped a quality, "special" brownie in my hand for the game watching festivities.

[Native Horn 3504]

3 hours ago, Al_4_ISU said:

You deserve some kind of award for not murdering the entire place.

Well, it does look kinda like 1991 in there.  #toosoon

[Al_4_ISU 12464]

At the in-laws. Cunt dog was quarantined, which is an amazing development. MIL was determined to be a cunt but my wife and BIL put their foot down immediately. FIL predictability is in love with pecan pie moonshine. We’ve all mixed bloodies and are watching you guys vs. Tech. Wife’s grandpa thinks everyone in said game is an idiot or a pussy. He’s 92, pitched for the White Sox, and has a chunk of North Korean shrapnel in his shoulder, so his crazy old man sports takes are rarely challenged.

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

1 minute ago, Al_4_ISU said:

At the in-laws. Cunt dog was quarantined, which is an amazing development. MIL was determined to be a cunt but my wife and BIL put their foot down immediately. FIL predictability is in love with pecan pie moonshine. We’ve all mixed bloodies and are watching you guys vs. Tech. Wife’s grandpa thinks everyone in said game is an idiot or a pussy. He’s 92, pitched for the White Sox, and has a chunk of North Korean shrapnel in his shoulder, so his crazy old man sports takes are rarely challenged.

The man is a bad ass.

[Al_4_ISU 12464]

The man is a bad ass.

Certifiable. Last fall, he fell over and broke his hip. He got carted to the nursing home, and everyone figured that was it (his wife passed in ‘14). Nope. He rehabbed, and moved back into his house shortly thereafter. He still lives mostly unassisted and drive himself out to the in-laws today, and they’re about 10 miles out of town in the middle of nowhere.

I’m glad my future children will carry his genes.

[Al_4_ISU 12464]

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