Official 2019 bitch about family/holiday drama thread

[MaybeACoordinator 8349]

8 minutes ago, Larry T. Spider said:

Today is a day that will live in infamy.

5 brave people stood up to a reign of terror than has lasted well over 30 years. The 3 children of MIL decided that no more shit will be taken and the the outlandish rudeness will stop and two were supported by spouses. It did not come without many battles throughout the day but she was thwarted at every turn. 

The final battle came around the great fire pit when SIL told her she should return to her dwelling (go to bed) if she is going to be negative and rude. MIL desperately looked for support, which she did not find, before heading to her nest.

For over an hour now the victorious children have celebrated the win and regaled each other with battle stories from the day, something that has never happened before. The battle of breakfast, the battle of prime rib, the aggression of cleaning before guests, the counter insurgence of child rearing criticism, and finally the battle of fire pit.

We may be lean, but for the first time we are unified and organized. The MIL has been put on notice, with a clear directive, that she shall ruin no more holidays. The long game has won. Let freedom ring.

On a more serious note, she was really told repeatedly that she is ruining everyone’s Christmas with her negativity and lashing out. Sounds like everybody has felt the same way for a long time and we finally got organized in supporting each other in putting a stop to it. Hallelujah.

Dude, this is like one of those moments in a slasher flick when they are standing around catching their breath while they are standing over the bleeding and crushed body of the killer after they have shot, stabbed, poisoned and run it over, and at last, they will have peace. 

And then the killer's eye opens, and its hand reaches for that one knife they forgot to kick out of reach....

[MNLonghornFUKM 8822]

Keep us updated how the MIL reacts tomorrow. if shes alive

[Larry T. Spider 1747]

5 minutes ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

Dude, this is like one of those moments in a slasher flick when they are standing around catching their breath while they are standing over the bleeding and crushed body of the killer after they have shot, stabbed, poisoned and run it over, and at last, they will have peace. 

And then the killer's eye opens, and its hand reaches for that one knife they forgot to kick out of reach....

Yeah, I’m sure that will be next Christmas. I actually think it will be an ongoing battle but it will be better now that we are all on the same page. One on one battles were impossible and demoralizing.

[GSU&UT 1798]

54 minutes ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Keep us updated how the MIL reacts tomorrow. if shes alive you're alive

FTFY

[luke duke 6414]

Today is a day that will live in infamy.
5 brave people stood up to a reign of terror than has lasted well over 30 years. The 3 children of MIL decided that no more shit will be taken and the the outlandish rudeness will stop and two were supported by spouses. It did not come without many battles throughout the day but she was thwarted at every turn. 
The final battle came around the great fire pit when SIL told her she should return to her dwelling (go to bed) if she is going to be negative and rude. MIL desperately looked for support, which she did not find, before heading to her nest.
For over an hour now the victorious children have celebrated the win and regaled each other with battle stories from the day, something that has never happened before. The battle of breakfast, the battle of prime rib, the aggression of cleaning before guests, the counter insurgence of child rearing criticism, and finally the battle of fire pit.
We may be lean, but for the first time we are unified and organized. The MIL has been put on notice, with a clear directive, that she shall ruin no more holidays. The long game has won. Let freedom ring.
On a more serious note, she was really told repeatedly that she is ruining everyone’s Christmas with her negativity and lashing out. Sounds like everybody has felt the same way for a long time and we finally got organized in supporting each other in putting a stop to it. Hallelujah.

Sorry about you getting your dick cut off tonight while you sleep.

[luke duke 6414]

My nieces and nephews are talking about college. My nephew is a savage. 
Niece: “if I go to college...”
Nephew interrupts her: “you gonna get a train run on you by all the players on the football team.”

Pics of your niece?

[Iceman 2726]

6 hours ago, Larry T. Spider said:

Today is a day that will live in infamy.

5 brave people stood up to a reign of terror than has lasted well over 30 years. The 3 children of MIL decided that no more shit will be taken and the the outlandish rudeness will stop and two were supported by spouses. It did not come without many battles throughout the day but she was thwarted at every turn. 

The final battle came around the great fire pit when SIL told her she should return to her dwelling (go to bed) if she is going to be negative and rude. MIL desperately looked for support, which she did not find, before heading to her nest.

For over an hour now the victorious children have celebrated the win and regaled each other with battle stories from the day, something that has never happened before. The battle of breakfast, the battle of prime rib, the aggression of cleaning before guests, the counter insurgence of child rearing criticism, and finally the battle of fire pit.

We may be lean, but for the first time we are unified and organized. The MIL has been put on notice, with a clear directive, that she shall ruin no more holidays. The long game has won. Let freedom ring.

On a more serious note, she was really told repeatedly that she is ruining everyone’s Christmas with her negativity and lashing out. Sounds like everybody has felt the same way for a long time and we finally got organized in supporting each other in putting a stop to it. Hallelujah.

Mark my words, coming soon is the self-pity/ sympathy game. It never ends with the manipulator just shutting it down because cooler heads told them to knock it off.

Stay strong for each other, folks-  winter is coming. Very cool how the 'intervention' brought the rest of you together.

[El Diablo 4232]

She'll die during the family get together next year, just to spite everyone. It'll be in her kids heads for eternity that they were somehow to blame for her untimely death. Long game wins.

[Armybrat 40920]

Who is to say it would be untimely?

[G650 14278]

33 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

Who is to say it would be untimely?

Well it hasn't happened yet, so...

[Parliament 14337]

Dude, this is like one of those moments in a slasher flick when they are standing around catching their breath while they are standing over the bleeding and crushed body of the killer after they have shot, stabbed, poisoned and run it over, and at last, they will have peace. 
And then the killer's eye opens, and its hand reaches for that one knife they forgot to kick out of reach....

Maybe not. Many bullies are cowards. Stand up to them once and they're afraid of you. MaC might be in the clear.

[Grade of D as in David 13253]

9 hours ago, Larry T. Spider said:

Today is a day that will live in infamy.

5 brave people stood up to a reign of terror than has lasted well over 30 years. The 3 children of MIL decided that no more shit will be taken and the the outlandish rudeness will stop and two were supported by spouses. It did not come without many battles throughout the day but she was thwarted at every turn. 

The final battle came around the great fire pit when SIL told her she should return to her dwelling (go to bed) if she is going to be negative and rude. MIL desperately looked for support, which she did not find, before heading to her nest.

For over an hour now the victorious children have celebrated the win and regaled each other with battle stories from the day, something that has never happened before. The battle of breakfast, the battle of prime rib, the aggression of cleaning before guests, the counter insurgence of child rearing criticism, and finally the battle of fire pit.

We may be lean, but for the first time we are unified and organized. The MIL has been put on notice, with a clear directive, that she shall ruin no more holidays. The long game has won. Let freedom ring.

On a more serious note, she was really told repeatedly that she is ruining everyone’s Christmas with her negativity and lashing out. Sounds like everybody has felt the same way for a long time and we finally got organized in supporting each other in putting a stop to it. Hallelujah.

Wolverines!

[RollLeft 5045]

On 12/24/2019 at 3:13 PM, Al_4_ISU said:

 

Its a semi legit fire pit. Just had to burn off the pile of leaves and branches that had been raked on top of it

 

Pics of shitty dog not showing up.

[Al_4_ISU 12503]

1 minute ago, RollLeft said:

Pics of shitty dog not showing up.

Next year I'll get a picture of him with his muzzle on.  It's always put on when we show up, and eventually someone thinks maybe this time he's learned, and removes it.  Then he starts growling, barking, and snapping at people, which results in the in-laws yelling at him, which ratchets up his nonsense, and then finally someone puts the muzzle back on and he shuts up.

The cycle repeats itself every couple of hours.  

One of the great ironies in all of this, is they got this dog after the long time family dog my wife grew up with passed.  They named the cunt dog in homage to the first dog.  The first dog was one of the nicest, most well behaved, and well trained dogs I've ever been around.  My FIL is actually pretty good with training dogs (he's got a great bird dog that stays outdoors), but this thing should have been put down years ago.  It's just an irredeemably bad dog, and they've become attached to the damn thing.

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

1 hour ago, El Diablo said:

She'll die during the family get together next year, just to spite everyone. It'll be in her kids heads for eternity that they were somehow to blame for her untimely death. Long game wins.

So they'll be able to take some measure of satisfaction.

[deadshank 24653]

It started back up at 7:45 AM EST.

MIL on post-Christmas rampage.  Clear, clean, box, store, lather, rinse, repeat.  FIL can do nothing right.   

My flight is at 4 PM.  I’m gonna leave for the airport early.   

[Texas St. Armadillos 1381]

28 minutes ago, deadshank said:

It started back up at 7:45 AM EST.

MIL on post-Christmas rampage.  Clear, clean, box, store, lather, rinse, repeat.  FIL can do nothing right.   

My flight is at 4 PM.  I’m gonna leave for the airport early.   

See if there is a Chili's you can hit up.

[deadshank 24653]

3 minutes ago, Texas St. Armadillos said:

See if there is a Chili's you can hit up.

In Charlotte.  Bojangle’s, brah.  Bojangle’s. 

[huge 3795]

39 minutes ago, deadshank said:

In Charlotte.  Bojangle’s, brah.  Bojangle’s. 

I bet the serve ice cold beer there.

[deadshank 24653]

FIL got new $4K hearing aids.  Refuses to turn them up so he can hear. He thinks merely placing the hearing aids in his ears solves the problem.  

Still stuck with explaining a drawn out story with infinite detail for 30+ minutes only to be capped with him saying “do what? Huh?”

[Anastasis 23488]

Just now, deadshank said:

FIL got new $4K hearing aids.  Refuses to turn them up so he can hear. He thinks merely placing the hearing aids in his ears solves the problem.  

Still stuck with explaining a drawn out story with infinite detail for 30+ minutes only to be capped with him saying “do what? Huh?”

It sounds like a self preservation tactic wrt MIL. 

[deadshank 24653]

2 minutes ago, Anastasis said:

It sounds like a self preservation tactic wrt MIL. 

Oh, he hears her all right.  Just like the rest of the neighborhood does.  

[Jameslaw121 4448]

Update on Cracker Barrel for Christmas Eve Lunch.

Turns out, unbeknownst to anyone who bothered to plan this lunch was that there are in fact two Cracker Barrels in Waco. Our plan was to meet at 11:30. Around 12:15, only half the family had arrived. And of course the people hadn't don't have cell phones. So guess who got to drive their ass down to Hewitt and retrieve grandma?

 

 

[Johnny Sack 8397]

4 minutes ago, Jameslaw121 said:

Update on Cracker Barrel for Christmas Eve Lunch.

Turns out, unbeknownst to anyone who bothered to plan this lunch was that there are in fact two Cracker Barrels in Waco. Our plan was to meet at 11:30. Around 12:15, only half the family had arrived. And of course the people hadn't don't have cell phones. So guess who got to drive their ass down to Hewitt and retrieve grandma?

 

 

I hope you grabbed a few tall boys for that chore.

[Jhawk 1075]

Atheist here... Rounded out my xmas fun with a 1 hour sermon and 3 prayers with my dad's side of the family last night.

This almost... ALMOST... makes me want to settle down with a girl again so I have built in excuses to not be around family for the holidays.  Makes me more pissed at the ex for fucking things up.  We got engaged on xmas on Isla Mujeres... we could have been there every year for our "anniversary" and no one would have given it a second thought.

Instead I'm drinking welch's sparkling juice in a lodge either talking politics or god.  What a fucking disaster.

[Guest Lobo]

10 minutes ago, Jhawk said:

Atheist here... Rounded out my xmas fun with a 1 hour sermon and 3 prayers with my dad's side of the family last night.

This almost... ALMOST... makes me want to settle down with a girl again so I have built in excuses to not be around family for the holidays.  Makes me more pissed at the ex for fucking things up.  We got engaged on xmas on Isla Mujeres... we could have been there every year for our "anniversary" and no one would have given it a second thought.

Instead I'm drinking welch's sparkling juice in a lodge either talking politics or god.  What a fucking disaster.

There's a lot to "unpack" here but I can't get past the "Lodge" reference.  I assume we're talking like VFW, Elks, Masonic, Moose, Rotarian, Scottish Rite, et. al.?  I've been to dozens of those across this great nation and I've never, ever been in one that wasn't a raging booze-fest.  If you found yourself in one and couldn't slink off to find some proper refreshment, aside from sparkling grape juice, I'm afraid we can't help you.  Those things are all percolating with alcohol.  

[Kennythetiger 9481]

1 hour ago, deadshank said:

FIL got new $4K hearing aids.  Refuses to turn them up so he can hear. He thinks merely placing the hearing aids in his ears solves the problem.  

Still stuck with explaining a drawn out story with infinite detail for 30+ minutes only to be capped with him saying “do what? Huh?”

You shouldn't be telling half-hour stories.  That's on you.  Just say the important stuff first.

[Parliament 14337]

The wifi at my mother's house. This is medieval.

[EE2B 1565]

I’ll be in Westerville in a couple of weeks, give me your moms address and I’ll swing by and check on it.

[Laxtonto 12121]

3 minutes ago, Parliament said:

The wifi at my mother's house. This is medieval.

Fuck, is that dial up

[Grade of D as in David 13253]

6 minutes ago, Parliament said:

The wifi at my mother's house. This is medieval.

Is she using Magic Jack?

[Pato del Muerto 52618]

11 minutes ago, Parliament said:

The wifi at my mother's house. This is medieval.

You pressed post on Christmas Eve, didn’t you. You can answer when you get home. 

[Pato del Muerto 52618]

12 hours ago, Larry T. Spider said:

Today is a day that will live in infamy.

5 brave people stood up to a reign of terror than has lasted well over 30 years. The 3 children of MIL decided that no more shit will be taken and the the outlandish rudeness will stop and two were supported by spouses. It did not come without many battles throughout the day but she was thwarted at every turn. 

The final battle came around the great fire pit when SIL told her she should return to her dwelling (go to bed) if she is going to be negative and rude. MIL desperately looked for support, which she did not find, before heading to her nest.

For over an hour now the victorious children have celebrated the win and regaled each other with battle stories from the day, something that has never happened before. The battle of breakfast, the battle of prime rib, the aggression of cleaning before guests, the counter insurgence of child rearing criticism, and finally the battle of fire pit.

We may be lean, but for the first time we are unified and organized. The MIL has been put on notice, with a clear directive, that she shall ruin no more holidays. The long game has won. Let freedom ring.

On a more serious note, she was really told repeatedly that she is ruining everyone’s Christmas with her negativity and lashing out. Sounds like everybody has felt the same way for a long time and we finally got organized in supporting each other in putting a stop to it. Hallelujah.

I need to know about today’s wallowing I’m self pity. Has she yet declared that she won’t host Christmas anymore since her family doesn’t want to come see her?  Or that she will see them at the next funeral, even if it’s hers?

[deadshank 24653]

25 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

You shouldn't be telling half-hour stories.  That's on you.  Just say the important stuff first.

My half hour stories are awesome and should be recorded for historical posterity. 

[Lone Star Horn 2018]

19 minutes ago, deadshank said:

My half hour stories are awesome and should be recorded for historical hysterical posterity. 

fify

[Etexhorn13 3053]

I think I enjoy Christmas at my in-laws more than Christmas at my parents’ house. Lots of cousins in the 20-30 age group, lots of fun family traditions, and I’m I’m the only “kid” in-law, so no one really gives me any shit and I just get to get drunk and be a spectator. 

[Larry T. Spider 1747]

45 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

I need to know about today’s wallowing I’m self pity. Has she yet declared that she won’t host Christmas anymore since her family doesn’t want to come see her?  Or that she will see them at the next funeral, even if it’s hers?

It’s about what everyone on here expected. She’s in the foulest of foul moods. BIL and FIL went to work (by choice) so it’s just me, her, wife and SIL. Of course, SIL continues to be great and calls her out on her shitty attitude. Nothing over the top, just incredibly rude to anybody that tries to talk to her. SIL told her at 9:30 this morning that she’s packing up and leaving if it continues. That is actually a threat because MIL like having everybody over. Somehow she hasn’t made the connection that people would come over much more often if she acted like a human. Probably because people keep coming back. I actually think she has a mood disorder or something.

Just a quick story on the rib roast ordeal from yesterday to give you a picture. SIL asks her husband when he is going to start cooking the 3 rib roasts. From across the house MIL rudely yells that he won’t be cooking any of them because she didn’t like the way his turned out last year. He doesn’t care then leaves the kitchen to watch sports. An hour later MIL comes back and yells at him that if he doesn’t start cooking his roast (1 of the 3) that it won’t be ready in time. We all look at each other like WTF. SIL proceeds to give it to MIL about her absurdity. 

He cooks his one roast, she cooks her two. As he’s cutting his up, she makes all types of noises and proclaims his to be raw and that nobody will eat that. 5 minutes later his is gone and only MIL and one other old lady are eating the shoe leather ones. His was actually slightly over cooked unintentionally but still ok. Well this pissed MIL off even more because she’s had mostly an uncontested reign of all things, including the food, until last year. Later she got sent to bed pissed off. 

I don’t really have any hope that it will get better, but it’s much more bearable when all the people in their 30s stick together. 

Edited December 26, 2019 by Larry T. Spider

[Jhawk 1075]

1 hour ago, Lobo said:

There's a lot to "unpack" here but I can't get past the "Lodge" reference.  I assume we're talking like VFW, Elks, Masonic, Moose, Rotarian, Scottish Rite, et. al.?  I've been to dozens of those across this great nation and I've never, ever been in one that wasn't a raging booze-fest.  If you found yourself in one and couldn't slink off to find some proper refreshment, aside from sparkling grape juice, I'm afraid we can't help you.  Those things are all percolating with alcohol.  

This was a rental cabin “event space” called the Hollis Lodge. It is on a bible camp type property that my uncle chose to live next to. A retreat for spiritual wellness if you will. 

I just returned the only gift I got this year. A shitty laptop bag. Grabbing a tumi after I have a few beers and talk to a banker for work. 

[jimmyjazz 46237]

Went to an extended family Xmas lunch yesterday.  One of my wife's sisters hosted.  My stepdaughter, who is 28 years old, was seated at the "teenager table".  Meanwhile, 2 of her cousins, both younger, were seated at the "adult table".

This shit has happened so many times, I wouldn't even know how to count them.  It's ostensibly because my wife is the youngest of 6 kids and was basically ignored most of her life; now, her kids get ignored, including not only my 2 stepkids but my 2 biological kids as well.  (Not that they should be viewed any differently, they're all 4 my wife's biological kids, just trying to put a sense of scale on the problem.)

It's fucking infuriating.

[dirtonia 269]

Having to take the golf cart to go smoke weed with the cows has been about as rough as it’s gotten this year.

[El Diablo 4232]

2 hours ago, Jameslaw121 said:

Update on Cracker Barrel for Christmas Eve Lunch.

Turns out, unbeknownst to anyone who bothered to plan this lunch was that there are in fact two Cracker Barrels in Waco. Our plan was to meet at 11:30. Around 12:15, only half the family had arrived. And of course the people hadn't don't have cell phones. So guess who got to drive their ass down to Hewitt and retrieve grandma?

 

 

You went to the CB across the highway from Luby's. Just an FYI in case y'all want a different location next year. You're welcome.  

[Jameslaw121 4448]

1 minute ago, El Diablo said:

You went to the CB across the highway from Luby's. Just an FYI in case y'all want a different location next year. You're welcome.  

yeah, on my way back I drove by there trying to find any place that sold alcohol....

[Guest Lobo]

2 hours ago, Jameslaw121 said:

Update on Cracker Barrel for Christmas Eve Lunch.

Turns out, unbeknownst to anyone who bothered to plan this lunch was that there are in fact two Cracker Barrels in Waco.

 

 

I read this as Parker Posey and Michael Hitchcock's characters from "Best in Show."  
We met each other at Cracker Barrel.  Not at the same Cracker Barrel.  But we saw each other at different Cracker Barrels, across the interstate from each other.  And Jameslaw got up the courage to go across the highway one Christmas and he thought maybe he should stay at that Cracker Barrel, but then what if the family went to the other Cracker Barrel while he was over at the other one.  

[deadshank 24653]

31 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Went to an extended family Xmas lunch yesterday.  One of my wife's sisters hosted.  My stepdaughter, who is 28 years old, was seated at the "teenager table".  Meanwhile, 2 of her cousins, both younger, were seated at the "adult table".

This shit has happened so many times, I wouldn't even know how to count them.  It's ostensibly because my wife is the youngest of 6 kids and was basically ignored most of her life; now, her kids get ignored, including not only my 2 stepkids but my 2 biological kids as well.  (Not that they should be viewed any differently, they're all 4 my wife's biological kids, just trying to put a sense of scale on the problem.)

It's fucking infuriating.

It’s all because YOU’RE the asshole. 

Or some such. 

[jimmyjazz 46237]

Probably.

[Mitch Cumsteen 18593]

My wife invited her single friend who has three daughters over for tamales on Christmas Eve. Wife starts drinking at lunch, continues to drink, never takes a nap. I tell her from the beginning, "Uh, you might want to pace yourself. Kim is good people and all, but I don't really want to spend Christmas Eve alone with her." So, my wife is heavily buzzed when they get there, proceeds to drunkenly give some expensive designer jacket out of her closet to one of Kim's daughters, continues drinking and disappears to bed midway through dinner. Kim and I hang out for a bit and shoot the shit -- I kill most of a jug of eggnog she brought over, and then she takes her kids and goes home. Wife wakes up two hours later and bitches me out because, "It's inappropriate for you to be hanging out with Kim alone on Christmas Eve." Then we get into a massive, ridiculous fight that she was too drunk to remember the next day. Merry Christmas!

[deadshank 24653]

I made it to CLT Airport.   My old lady is sitting at a different gate than me because I guess she’s mad at me.   Who knows?   

Parting shot with MIL was picking up lunch and bringing back to house.  She wanted a hamburger “all the way.”   I brought her back a “cheeseburger all the way...with no cheese.” (Nod to GMSH).  

That set off another round of Israeli-Arab conflict on the West Bank, Russia invading Outer Mongolia and what have you with other garden variety unrest.   

Humorless people are humorous. 

Also, while picking up said cheeseburger with no cheese, FIL and I ran into his money manager dude.  A sawed-off, grimy little pimp.  FIL introduces me as SoIL from Houston.   Talk turns to things Texas and it turns out grimy pimp money boy is full red-assed ct aggy.  He no happy when he figures out I don’t give a shit about jimbo, aggy football, stupid dogs or bonfire.  I checked to see how much 27-25 still sticks in his grimy craw.   

It do. 

So, the stint ended well.  

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

1 hour ago, dirtonia said:

Having to take the golf cart to go smoke weed with the cows has been about as rough as it’s gotten this year.

That's biscuit, and gravy time brah.

[deadshank 24653]

6 minutes ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

My wife invited her single friend who has three daughters over for tamales on Christmas Eve. Wife starts drinking at lunch, continues to drink, never takes a nap. I tell her from the beginning, "Uh, you might want to pace yourself. Kim is good people and all, but I don't really want to spend Christmas Eve alone with her." So, my wife is heavily buzzed when they get there, proceeds to drunkenly give some expensive designer jacket out of her closet to one of Kim's daughters, continues drinking and disappears to bed midway through dinner. Kim and I hang out for a bit and shoot the shit -- I kill most of a jug of eggnog she brought over, and then she takes her kids and goes home. Wife wakes up two hours later and bitches me out because, "It's inappropriate for you to be hanging out with Kim alone on Christmas Eve." Then we get into a massive, ridiculous fight that she was too drunk to remember the next day. Merry Christmas!

Uh....pics of Kim?  

[NeverMarryAStripper 21946]

17 minutes ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

My wife invited her single friend who has three daughters over for tamales on Christmas Eve. Wife starts drinking at lunch, continues to drink, never takes a nap. I tell her from the beginning, "Uh, you might want to pace yourself. Kim is good people and all, but I don't really want to spend Christmas Eve alone with her." So, my wife is heavily buzzed when they get there, proceeds to drunkenly give some expensive designer jacket out of her closet to one of Kim's daughters, continues drinking and disappears to bed midway through dinner. Kim and I hang out for a bit and shoot the shit -- I kill most of a jug of eggnog she brought over, and then she takes her kids and goes home. Wife wakes up two hours later and bitches me out because, "It's inappropriate for you to be hanging out with Kim alone on Christmas Eve." Then we get into a massive, ridiculous fight that she was too drunk to remember the next day. Merry Christmas!

Sounds to me like it was time for a mother daughters fivesome