6figs/"Trust the Hamm" greatest hits

[CHEF RIBS W/ THE HAMM YALL 1267]

26 minutes ago, Tex Pete said:

Hamm isn’t actually bad at his job. His problem is that he can’t keep his mouth shut, which causes him problems with the aggy coaching staff and with some recruits and his employer. He knows how to peddle aggy feel-good bullshit, which is all that moronic fan base wants to read. 

Nm 

Edited August 10, 2019 by CHEF RIBS W/ THE HAMM YALL

[HtownHorn 14754]

3 hours ago, Tex Pete said:

Hamm isn’t actually bad at his job. His problem is that he can’t keep his mouth shut, which causes him problems with the aggy coaching staff and with some recruits and his employer. He knows how to peddle aggy feel-good bullshit, which is all that moronic fan base wants to read. 

He was very bad at his job. Which is why he would get testy on the boards, when things didn't go the way he predicted because his only sources were other recruits. He's only adult source was FWK, but even then, FWK works more with pro athletes than recruitable HS kids, and Texas has ended up signing more than aggy has.

Carter, Shepherd, and Broughton vs. Demas

[CHEF RIBS W/ THE HAMM YALL 1267]

16 minutes ago, HtownHorn said:

He was very bad at his job. Which is why he would get testy on the boards, when things didn't go the way he predicted because his only sources were other recruits. He's only adult source was FWK, but even then, FWK works more with pro athletes than recruitable HS kids, and Texas has ended up signing more than aggy has.

Carter, Shepherd, and Broughton vs. Demas

It depends how you define his job. 

Does he know anything about recruiting?  Not really. 

Is he entertaining? Absolutely, in an extremely self-unaware way. Most of these $9.95ers are entertainers and nothing more, nothing less.

Needless to say, despite being entertaining, everything he touches turns to ashes, so... he finds a way to ruin whatever he has/had going for him. 

[Bevo14 8355]

5 hours ago, CHEF RIBS W/ THE HAMM YALL said:

Needless to say, despite being entertaining, everything he touches turns to ashes, so... he finds a way to ruin whatever he has/had going for him. 

Username checks out

[Longhornfrenzy 5782]

Don't ever change Hamm

[SydneyCarton 48134]

The past 24 hours seems to indicate that Hamm has reached some sort of custody agreement and probably his alimony check. Homeboy is feeling his oats. He’s back!

[Newy25 7703]

16 hours ago, KYHorn said:

no cr

I thought it read exactly like a Trump tweet as well. Hilarious. 

[Rickylovesweed 14532]

11 hours ago, Tex Pete said:

Hamm isn’t actually bad at his job. His problem is that he can’t keep his mouth shut, which causes him problems with the aggy coaching staff and with some recruits and his employer. He knows how to peddle aggy feel-good bullshit, which is all that moronic fan base wants to read. 

Hamm was paid to get intel on recruits and he went 0 for 16 on predictions one time. He was bad at his job. 

[Richter 2261]

He could literally walk into any pool cleaning business in the market and get a job....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then he would get fired.

[Tex Pete 20407]

9 hours ago, HtownHorn said:

He was very bad at his job. Which is why he would get testy on the boards, when things didn't go the way he predicted because his only sources were other recruits. 

At any other school/fan base, I’d agree with you. With aggy, he delivered the Kool-Aid they will pay for. All the aggy sites are pretty similar. His downfall was being a prick and not knowing when to stay off the internet.

Predictions? All aggy say they’re getting everyone. It’s who they are. 

[RabidM 2668]

He was really good at certain aspects of his job and really bad at others. The bad ended up outweighing the good, but he knew how to feed the BS and validation the fanbase so desperately wanted.

I was really sad when 247 let him go. The entertainment he provided was seemingly boundless.

Edited August 10, 2019 by RabidM

[lemonandaturd 4285]

If Hamm is thought of as a clown at his chosen career,  when does he decide to change careers?  Maybe that was the pool cleaner interlude.  He has lost his job multiple times, his wife and family, yet he still wants to argue with random internet aggy dudes about his skill as a recruiting reporter.  Dude is a certified fool.  Best in Jimbo's business.  

[markstanco 12586]

For someone who constantly brings up the aggy network, the aggy network is certainly not helping him. Fired as a pool guy? Maybe some aggy owns an automatic carwash in Cypress.

[texifornia 57032]

Karen's BACK

[Radical Larry 28656]

In a chat room with recruits’ moms. JFC.

[GRHorn 105]

7 minutes ago, Radical Larry said:

In a chat room with recruits’ moms. JFC.

If you have any financial needs come up, just bring it up in the group thread. I’ll run it through the “charity”. 

Again, she is an integral part to Jimbo’s operation. Think how pathetic that is. 

Edited August 13, 2019 by GRHorn

[BruceVonClaude 212]

8 minutes ago, texifornia said:

Karen's BACK

I never implied I had insider info!  Two sentences later, I am in a chat room with recruit's mothers where I am privy to insider info.

[RGBIII 22840]

Guarantee she still uses AOL and dial up

[Neonmoon 38129]

Just a loyal supporter who followed Jimbo from FSU to A&M and is associated with his charity group in a group chat with parents of A&M recruits. Totally normal. 

 

[VirginiaLonghorn 4780]

47 minutes ago, Neonmoon said:

Just a loyal supporter who followed Jimbo from FSU to A&M and is associated with his charity group in a group chat with parents of A&M recruits. Totally normal. 

 

Yes .. totally. 

[texifornia 57032]

Yes Gnome, this is the wagon you've hitched yourself too.

[texifornia 57032]

lord in heaven

[KYHorn 17107]

21 minutes ago, texifornia said:

Yes Gnome, this is the wagon you've hitched yourself too.

Stacks of cash are excellent de-stressors

[Chopper 17241]

1 hour ago, texifornia said:

lord in heaven

 

I'd recommend spoiler'ing that and adding a warning that it may induce vomit upon reading. 

[Leanderman 2275]

Yeah recruits moms, message me privately with how much you need so I can tell dumbo to write a check from the charity account.

[ShaggyBevo RIP 3868]

1 hour ago, KYHorn said:

Stacks of cash are excellent de-stressors

Life is always easier when you can rub some money on your stressors. 

[markstanco 12586]

@longhornnation is picking on the hamster.

[OnAComputer 1405]

[Sabalo 997]

3 hours ago, texifornia said:

lord in heaven

Surely EJ was top 3 before he went to Rivals.

Edited August 13, 2019 by Sabalo

[texifornia 57032]

[Pato del Muerto 52534]

So only half of their classes, since the 3 star moms don’t get invited. 

And why is she at a camp chatting up moms?  

[RomaVicta 29947]

Quote

We laugh 'til we cry.

How exactly does that work in a chat room? How do you actually know what "we" are doing?

She either thinks a chat room is an actual room and she's just making shit up,  or she is actually meeting these women in person and laughing until the cry as the bag is passed.

[NOMAAA 1696]

chat room?

[C-Man 27238]

13 minutes ago, NOMAAA said:

chat room?

Pancho Chat?

[Noah Fence 480]

 

[SameSame 1705]

1 hour ago, texifornia said:

Makes no fucking sense.

And just typical aggy

[irishtexan 11522]

That woman really is the perfect aggy. 

[TrashMaster G 17579]

3 hours ago, markstanco said:

@longhornnation is picking on the hamster.

Internet scavenger hunt time:  Find an example of a time when Hamm was clearly wrong on a prospect that went in UT's favor over aggy, and he admitted he blew it.

[Viper 12109]

23 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

Internet scavenger hunt time:  Find an example of a time when Hamm was clearly wrong on a prospect that went in UT's favor over aggy, and he admitted he blew it.

[Carl Spackler 3488]

[Beau Vine 54311]

1 hour ago, TrashMaster G said:

Internet scavenger hunt time:  Find an example of a time when Hamm was clearly wrong on a prospect that went in UT's favor over aggy, and he admitted he blew it.

[The Earl of Texas 3158]

Can you imagine how much it would suck if your kid was being recruited, so you join a group chat with other moms like you in an attempt to best help your kid, and you find out that in that group is a paid goon loyal to one of the coaches who is interested in your son?  Creepy as fuck.

Like, good luck voicing your concerns to other Moms about how you don’t want your son playing for the same guy who covered up a rape for his star QB at Florida State...

Edited August 14, 2019 by The Earl of Texas

[Richter 2261]

36 minutes ago, The Earl of Texas said:

Can you imagine how much it would suck if your kid was being recruited, so you join a group chat with other moms like you in an attempt to best help your kid, and you find out that in that group is a paid goon loyal to one of the coaches who is interested in your son?  Creepy as fuck.

Like, good luck voicing your concerns to other Moms about how you don’t want you son playing for the same guy who covered up a rape for his star QB at Florida State...

Yeah, that would really suck until she started giving me tons of money.

[Sabalo 997]

I wonder if Mama Broughton was in that chat room? That one certainly didn't turn out the Karen predicted.

[Deej 76858]

4 minutes ago, Sabalo said:

I wonder if Mama Broughton was in that chat room? That one certainly didn't turn out the Karen predicted.

Yeah, she left the chat once Karen put her ovaries on the table.

[derp 764]

6 minutes ago, Deej said:

Yeah, she left the chat once Karen put her ovaries on the table.

I wonder if she openly challenges the mothers to bar fights.

[SHOOTER12 8814]

22 minutes ago, Deej said:

Yeah, she left the chat once Karen put her ovaries on the table.

Yep those crusty, wrinkled, shriveled, hair/fuzz covered rotted ovaries... ( Shivers at the thought).

Would scare anyone off.

[Deej 76858]

6 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Yep those crusty, wrinkled, shriveled, hair/fuzz covered rotted ovaries... ( Shivers at the thought).

Would scare anyone off.

[HtownHorn 14754]

Karen has been awfully quiet on the boards since the Broughton whiff. Maybe she is treating that group chat as therapy since her Jimbo is getting his ass whipped, and she isn't the one doing it.

[SHOOTER12 8814]

14 minutes ago, Deej said:

Damn deej, I am rolling...perfect,. perfect.