6figs/"Trust the Hamm" greatest hits

[Napoleon 8,694]

6 hours ago, RandomIdoit said:

My dad is supposedly a tiny extra in a marching scene in this film. 

Graduated from high school, did a bit of JuCo, went to A&M for a semester (hated it to his “core”), got drafted, completed his service, applied to a school out of state and never mentioned that he spent a semester at A&M. 

I have never watched this, but I was an extra in “Gone In 60 Seconds” and 4 episodes of the last season of the original “BH 90210”, so I’m a chip off the ol’ block.

[EP_Texican 377]

Pooooooorrrrr Hamm.

(Sorry, very new to surly. Hamm posts still go here? Or is it just Karen now?)




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[Vertigo 20,306]

I am not sure I like this semi self aware Hamm. I don't want to laugh at his jokes, I want to laugh at HIM. 

[txhorns 2,413]

I mean give Hamm credit.  He is spot on with that.

[Pato del Muerto 52,558]

He’s talking about the braves and his son. How can I steer this to the Aggies and/or myself?

[Scholz 11,956]

The Braves have won it all in modern history. Incorrect, smurf.

[Ricky's one-hitter 9,120]

You fucking wish, Hamm. You've never had a Cobby Box, Hank Aaron, or Chipper Jones. You've never had a Greg Maddux or John Smoltz. You have never won your division in 14 consecutive seasons. 

Revel in your mediocrity for it's own sake. Bandwagoning your ineptitude is futile.

[HtownHorn 14,761]

Meanwhile, Sallee and Travis are both wondering who the midget is in their mentions.

[Sejjr 3,246]

Clay Travis and Taylor Hamm on one fucking tweet. Talk about a shit-stain...

and poor Taylor...he will never get that coveted Blue Check to show the world he has truly arrived.

Edited August 23, 2019 by Sejjr

[Dennis Taylor 18,852]

54 minutes ago, Ricky's one-hitter said:

You fucking wish, Hamm. You've never had a Cobby Box, Hank Aaron, or Chipper Jones. You've never had a Greg Maddux or John Smoltz. You have never won your division in 14 consecutive seasons. 

Revel in your mediocrity for it's own sake. Bandwagoning your ineptitude is futile.

Cobby Box would be a good band name

and is he a better manager than bobby cox? because no one did less with more than bobby cox. and also he beat his wife. and larry was very overrated

Edited August 23, 2019 by Dennis Taylor

[irishtexan 11,522]

Aggy is more like the San Diego Padres.

[Pato del Muerto 52,558]

46 minutes ago, Dennis Taylor said:

Cobby Box would be a good band name

and is he a better manager than bobby cox? because no one did less with more than bobby cox. and also he beat his wife. and larry was very overrated

Chipper, when compared to other 3b or other switch hitters, is not overrated. 

[Scholz 11,956]

aggys are the St Louis Browns. Won a single pennant in the 1940s and then morphed into the Baltimore Orioles. Still shitty.

[Carl Spackler 3,491]

1 hour ago, irishtexan said:

Aggy is more like the San Diego Padres.

Padres at least made a couple World Series that people can actually recall.  Aggy hasn't even finished in the top 4 in football since Hitler blitzkrieged through France.

[pacman 7,369]

2 hours ago, Ricky's one-hitter said:

You fucking wish, Hamm. You've never had a Cobby Box, Hank Aaron, or Chipper Jones. You've never had a Greg Maddux or John Smoltz. You have never won your division in 14 consecutive seasons. 

Revel in your mediocrity for it's own sake. Bandwagoning your ineptitude is futile.

Yeah, as a Braves fan, I don't see that at all. Of course, I grew up a fan in the 80s so I am appreciative of any success the Braves had.

 

A more apt comparison would be the Devil Rays. No history of success, just a glimpse here or there.

[sushihorn 3,233]

2 hours ago, Ricky's one-hitter said:

You fucking wish, Hamm. You've never had a Cobby Box, Hank Aaron, or Chipper Jones. You've never had a Greg Maddux or John Smoltz. You have never won your division in 14 consecutive seasons.

To be fair, aggy has plenty of John Rockers.

[C-Man 27,253]

2 hours ago, Scholz said:

aggys are the St Louis Browns. Won a single pennant in the 1940s and then morphed into the Baltimore Orioles. Still shitty.

The Mariners and Nationals are the only current MLB teams to never reach the World Series. aggy's streak of futility stretches 30 years longer than the oldest of those two clubs' existence.

Edited August 23, 2019 by C-Man

[Viper 12,111]

If we're measuring by championship appearances in the big three sports, aggy is what? 5th in the state? 

[Magus Ossis 2,832]

We Run from This State

[ShowMeALoss 143]

He is equating the Braves' October futility to Aggy's lifetime futility, so he is really not that far off with the analogy.

[lemonandaturd 4,285]

John Rocker is appalled by red ass aggys at Bonfarr  with chain saws, sheets with hoods and jizz jars all while marching  to a Nazi beat.  

[Huckleberry 33,067]

4 hours ago, Viper said:

If we're measuring by championship appearances in the big three sports, aggy is what? 5th in the state? 

 

[HtownHorn 14,761]

Karen is back with a vengeance. Her latest target is Desmond Howard's choke a bitch comment this morning.

[SydneyCarton 48,149]

Can’t wait to hear her take on Wayne Brady too. 

[BurntOrangeCrush 1,022]

3 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

Can’t wait to hear her take on Wayne Brady too. 

 

[EP_Texican 377]

Karen is back with a vengeance. Her latest target is Desmond Howard's choke a bitch comment this morning.

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[texifornia 57,069]

"If it came out of another mouth heads would roll" whatever could she be referring to?

[SydneyCarton 48,149]

Wonder what she thinks about fucking someone straight in the pussy? Wonder how female college football fans should feel about that?

 

oh and rape. 

Edited August 24, 2019 by SydneyCarton

[Butch Had Not 2,992]

2 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

Wonder what she thinks about fucking someone straight in the pussy? Wonder how female college football fans should feel about that?

 

oh and rape. 

Someone needs to tweet that to her.

[RGBIII 22,840]

11 minutes ago, Butch Had Not said:

Someone needs to tweet that to her.

Pretty sure everyone on here is blocked by her on twitter

[Eastwood 4,394]

Her hashtag is one typo away from ending up perfectly placed in an aggy tweet.

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[HtownHorn 14,761]

Lulz, 247 nuked Karen's thread about Howard due to her getting called a hypocrite over her defense of the rapist.

[BurntOrangeCrush 1,022]

1 hour ago, EP_Texican said:

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KKL is a woman?

 

[TheBryMan81 2,515]

1 hour ago, EP_Texican said:

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"And anything about choking a woman should bother you tbh"

Unless you're talking about South Austin's mom, cause she kinda likes it

[Vertigo 20,306]

38 minutes ago, BurntOrangeCrush said:

KKL is a woman?

 

Allegedly. I have not seen definitive proof.

 

[EP_Texican 377]

Allegedly. I have not seen definitive proof.
 

I don’t think I want to see definitive proof. I’ll take her/his word for it.


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[Deej 76,893]

43 minutes ago, Vertigo said:

Allegedly. I have not seen definitive proof.

 

Is she going to have to throw her ovaries down on the table to prove it to you?

[Wishbone 4,772]

1 hour ago, Vertigo said:

Allegedly. I have not seen definitive proof.

 

Hint: She has no ovaries.

[Deej 76,893]

2 minutes ago, Wishbone said:

Hint: She has no ovaries.

Did you check on the table?

[Pato del Muerto 52,558]

4 minutes ago, Wishbone said:

Hint: She has no ovaries.

Maybe they descended 

[lemonandaturd 4,285]

12 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Maybe they descended 

When her balls dropped.  

[Funk Doctor Spock 12,483]

Just now, lemonandaturd said:

When her balls dropped.  

Next to her saggy pancakes titties

[Pato del Muerto 52,558]

1 minute ago, Spider2YBanana said:

Next to her saggy pancakes titties

[Deej 76,893]

23 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Plonsky?

[Spawn of Cthulhu 2,241]

She’s “Never Been Licked”. Instead of permabanning, we should force the shittiest noob (I’m not a noob, BTW) to correction this omission.

[Shaddie 1,651]

19 minutes ago, Spawn of Cthulhu said:

She’s “Never Been Licked”. Instead of permabanning, we should force the shittiest noob (I’m not a noob, BTW) to correction this omission.

You sir are an evil and sadistic son of a bitch. 

 

 

 

I support you 100%. 

[SizzleChest 8,284]

15 hours ago, Wishbone said:

Hint: She has no ovaries.

 

[EP_Texican 377]

Karen:


Also Karen:



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[UDontKnow 10,447]

3 minutes ago, EP_Texican said:

Karen:


Also Karen:



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Dick-less men? She's talking about her beloved Jimbo!

[BigSwingingD 719]

3 hours ago, EP_Texican said:

Karen:


Also Karen:



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There could not be a better representative of Dem Good Ole Texum Aggys!

It's a horse race with Sharp, Chin Pubes, Jizzbo and the Hamminator.

Male cheeleaders! Whoop!