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6figs/"Trust the Hamm" greatest hits

Machinator

By Machinator
in 🤫$9.95🤫

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Aggy h8tr
Aggy h8tr

You're welcome   

Sejjr
Sejjr
Pato del Muerto
Pato del Muerto

It’s because he predicted that she’d stay with him. 

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Pato del Muerto

Pato del Muerto 52571

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8 minutes ago, Viper said:

She's no longer listed on the real estate website Hamm is on.

http://search.kwnortheasthouston.com/idx/roster

and HammReality is no more

https://www.har.com/HammRealty

 

Jesus, there’s like 200 agents at that place.  And when I clicked in current and sold listings for Mr. Hamm, I get zero results. 

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Viper

Viper 12112

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10 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

I also know that both he and his wife used to be present on their agent search page. So either:

 

1.) He's gone with another agency

2.) She's gone with another agency and/or switched jobs

3.) She's reverted to her maiden name and she's still on there.

 

http://search.kwnortheasthouston.com/idx/roster

Taylor is still on that page, and Cheryl isn't. 

Also https://www.har.com/HammRealty was still up as of last week. It's gone now.

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Butch Had Not

Butch Had Not 2992

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4 minutes ago, crash_davis said:

we're getting awfully personal here.  i hate the douchebag but this is getting uncomfortable.

You don't think he hasn't gotten personal with 9.95s, recruits,  coaches? He wanted to be a public figure and not a likeable one at that.  Sucks for him but he's signed up for all kinds of scrutiny.

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I Plead Da Fif

I Plead Da Fif 293

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So to recap, Crazy Karen was coming on to Hamm by saying she was going to get whiskey drunk, naked, and in those texts she ended her text with her name and number, even though they were texts over the phone.

What in the ever loving fuck?

I now see how they’re trying to charge 9.95. You are paying to see Real World with Aggy fairy dust mixed in, except this idiocy is not staged, the people are really that deluded and insane.

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Hank Scorpio

Hank Scorpio 17729

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If you read between the lines in the recruiting updates he was posting you could tell that something was up. It's pretty subtle. 

From 5/3: There's no truth to the rumors that Leal is looking around, he's made a commitment and he knows how important commitments are and would never break the vows he's made, unlike some people I know. 

From 5/15: Hearing that Taurean Carter and Jeffrey Carter are a package deal, because they understand the importance of keeping a family together and won't split up simply because Jeffrey  is too good for Taurean and has much better options available to him. 

From 6/10: The commitment of Kenyon Green is a huge get for Jimbo and he's really an impressive young man. I think that when this is all over me and him should get an apartment together. 

From 6/11: Three star offensive tackle Blake Trainor committed immediately after receiving his offer, because he knows that loyalty is the most important thing even if he had better offers out there. 

 

 

 

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Quasimofo

Quasimofo 406

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That old heifer emasculates him at every turn, and now he has doxxed her. And somewhere in there, she tried to Mrs. Robinson him with some Woodford. You could start to feel sorry for him, but then you remember how childish and petty he is. Bryan Carrington is on the other end of it now. And you get all this for $10 a month! Or free, if you follow LHF.

Sucks for his kids, though. Wouldn't wish that on any kids.

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I Plead Da Fif

I Plead Da Fif 293

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4 minutes ago, Hank Scorpio said:

If you read between the lines in the recruiting updates he was posting you could tell that something was up. It's pretty subtle. 

From 5/3: There's no truth to the rumors that Leal is looking around, he's made a commitment and he knows how important commitments are and would never break the vows he's made, unlike some people I know. 

From 5/15: Hearing that Taurean Carter and Jeffrey Carter are a package deal, because they understand the importance of keeping a family together and won't split up simply because Jeffrey  is too good for Taurean and has much better options available to him. 

From 6/10: The commitment of Kenyon Green is a huge get for Jimbo and he's really an impressive young man. I think that when this is all over me and him should get an apartment together. 

From 6/11: Three star offensive tackle Blake Trainor committed immediately after receiving his offer, because he knows that loyalty is the most important thing even if he had better offers out there. 

 

 

 

So is she hot or did she just wake up and decide she doesn’t want a 5’9” beta male with a needle dick?

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GotThatFire

GotThatFire 166

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Ya ya sucks for the kids and all, but Mommy has probably already found a real man and they are calling him Daddy. They'll be fine. Every morning she watched Hamm walk out on his crying screaming kids so he could go watch high school boys and try to convince them to play at A&M. No self respecting woman will put up with that for very long. Those kids deserve a real Dad.

 

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Vertigo

Vertigo 20312

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46 minutes ago, Lobwedgephil said:

And for the record, she filed for divorce in March. Sucks for him as I don't wish that on anybody. 

Could I venture a guess as to why she left? She wants him to grow up and get a big boy job and be home with the kinds and he wants to chase high school boys around the state and be on the road sniffing jocks? Just a guess. Also, what a fucking rube if he actually sacrificed his family for his continued attempts at this worthless industry. I truly hope that is not the case for all of their sakes.

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Sejjr

Sejjr 3246

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It was 100% inevitable that Hamm's relationship with Stalker Karen would back-fire stupendously. We all knew it was coming. But I really expected that we'd need the season underway and aggy decommit season started before it reached Cherynobl proportions. 

One thing Hammster has shown over the years, he is a mental midget when it comes to social media slap fights. My money right now is on the old broad.

Either way, what a fun off-season bonus for all of us.

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Fud

Fud 9552

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45 minutes ago, Hank Scorpio said:

If you read between the lines in the recruiting updates he was posting you could tell that something was up. It's pretty subtle. 

From 5/3: There's no truth to the rumors that Leal is looking around, he's made a commitment and he knows how important commitments are and would never break the vows he's made, unlike some people I know. 

From 5/15: Hearing that Taurean Carter and Jeffrey Carter are a package deal, because they understand the importance of keeping a family together and won't split up simply because Jeffrey  is too good for Taurean and has much better options available to him. 

From 6/10: The commitment of Kenyon Green is a huge get for Jimbo and he's really an impressive young man. I think that when this is all over me and him should get an apartment together. 

From 6/11: Three star offensive tackle Blake Trainor committed immediately after receiving his offer, because he knows that loyalty is the most important thing even if he had better offers out there. 

 

 

 

Image result for survivor smile gif

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RomaVicta

RomaVicta 29988

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Karen seems to be a world class trolling catfisher. The glories of A&M post is clearly made up and the drinking naked post is further bait. She's fun enough to read but clearly not to be believed. 

The only reason I'd care about the fact of Hamm's divorce is if his ex is Karen showing him what being an internet operator looks like.

Otherwise, I don't care much about Hamm's personal life including his kids. It's none of my business. That his public life indicates a sick obsession with being famous and important by association with Texas A&M football recruiting (no matter how distant and tenuous) does interest me as a fan of train wrecks.

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GotThatFire

GotThatFire 166

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28 minutes ago, Vertigo said:

Could I venture a guess as to why she left? She wants him to grow up and get a big boy job and be home with the kinds and he wants to chase high school boys around the state and be on the road sniffing jocks? Just a guess. Also, what a fucking rube if he actually sacrificed his family for his continued attempts at this worthless industry. I truly hope that is not the case for all of their sakes.

Yup. If I had to guess... If I was Hamm, what would it take to make my wife take the kids and leave? it would probably be...the picture of him at a waterpark with little boys, the fact that he followed little boys into a bathroom and this twitter post, which he posted online for the world to see because I don't know?? 

 

 

After all that, she started thinking her kids need a real Dad, not a jock sniffing, bathroom stalking midget fanboy that's going to embarrass her and the kids their entire lives.. They probably got into some arguments and every single one of them ended with Hamm leaving the house to follow little boys around. What an asshole

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Tired of Lurking

Tired of Lurking 637

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38 minutes ago, GotThatFire said:

Ya ya sucks for the kids and all, but Mommy has probably already found a real man and they are calling him Daddy. They'll be fine. Every morning she watched Hamm walk out on his crying screaming kids so he could go watch high school boys and try to convince them to play at A&M. No self respecting woman will put up with that for very long. Those kids deserve a real Dad.

 

I wonder if BC is sliding it in the buns. 

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sidis

sidis 9832

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1 minute ago, Hanrahan said:

restraining order.

anyone who needed a softball placed squarely on a tee for the Kody Clemens treatment?

sad news about his family breaking up.  perhaps that's why he's acting like such a petulant twat towards Carrington and his own followers (based entirely on reading the last few pages).

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Carl Spackler

Carl Spackler 3498

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Sympathy for the kids.

Sympathy for the wife (though she did make the decision to marry the delusional little prick).

Zero sympathy for bathroom smurf.  I can only hope that this does not lessen his delusions of grandeur.  I'd hate to lose what has been an infinite source of laughter up to now.

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Dr. Teeth

Dr. Teeth 5845

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25 minutes ago, GotThatFire said:

Yup. If I had to guess... If I was Hamm, what would it take to make my wife take the kids and leave? it would probably be...the picture of him at a waterpark with little boys, the fact that he followed little boys into a bathroom and this twitter post, which he posted online for the world to see because I don't know?? 

 

 

After all that, she started thinking her kids need a real Dad, not a jock sniffing, bathroom stalking midget fanboy that's going to embarrass her and the kids their entire lives.. They probably got into some arguments and every single one of them ended with Hamm leaving the house to follow little boys around. What an asshole 

Hey, it all worked out well. We got Ossai.

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BurntOrangeCrush

BurntOrangeCrush 1024

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16 minutes ago, GotThatFire said:

How could you watch and film your son crying like that and then just leave to go see a high school boy play football? Not only that, but then be so content with your actions that you decide to post the video on the internet?? Shit makes me ragey. 

 

Agreed. As a dad myself, that is way out of line. What a d-bag

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Sejjr

Sejjr 3246

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1 minute ago, GotThatFire said:

Over/under on whether Taylor sees the error of his ways, quits his ridiculously childish job, and gets his family back??

About the same as the over/under on when he will learn to make consumable ribs. I'd lean with "NEVER".

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