6figs/"Trust the Hamm" greatest hits

[Scholz 11,943]

17 minutes ago, Sejjr said:

About the same as the over/under on when he will learn to make consumable ribs. I'd lean with "NEVER".

Why she left?

[EZ$ 2,105]

My guess is the ex-wife googled him and found the thread about him on Shaggy. That’s a marriage-ender for sure. 

[SydneyCarton 48,108]

Yeah, I realize I'm partly responsible for this sideways tangent by verbalizing my hunch, but I have to say this is kind of unpleasant to watch unfold. Granted, this guy has repeatedly forced himself to try and be a public figure, and he's going to get roasted, but it sucks seeing someone's personal lives thrown out there for people to see with stark clarity that they haven't volunteered. 

On the other hand, he is a giant twat, and watching this idiot go through a mid life crisis in his 30's should be outstanding entertainment for all of us. 

Edited June 13, 2018 by SydneyCarton

[Carl Spackler 3,483]

4 minutes ago, crash_davis said:

those 2 demented idiots deserve each other.  that whole fucking fan base deserves both of those imbeciles.

[lemonandaturd 4,285]

3 minutes ago, EZ$ said:

My guess is the ex-wife googled him and found the thread about him on Shaggy. That’s a marriage-ender for sure. 

Was there a lot of feces on his Shaggy thread?

[C-Man 27,230]

54 minutes ago, Carl Spackler said:

Sympathy for the kids.

Sympathy for the wife (though she did make the decision to marry the delusional little prick).

Zero sympathy for bathroom smurf.  I can only hope that this does not lessen his delusions of grandeur.  I'd hate to lose what has been an infinite source of laughter up to now.

About where I am on this.

54 minutes ago, GotThatFire said:

How could you watch and film your son crying like that and then just leave to go see a high school boy play football? Not only that, but then be so content with your actions that you decide to post the video on the internet?? Shit makes me ragey. 

 

Meh. Kid is having a mild tantrum. I've seen much worse. But Hamm gargles Ol' Sarge's cock so fuck him sideways.

[GotThatFire 166]

All kids throw tantrums. It's the entire context that bothers me. 

[TexOx 110]

1 hour ago, Hanrahan said:

Hamm’s divorce looks nasty. Bunch of documents under seal and a mutual restraining order.

Don't read too much into that. Mutual restraining orders are pretty standard in a contested divorce, and pretty much everything will be under seal in a family law case involving minor children.

[dingleberryswitzer 2,724]

19 minutes ago, GotThatFire said:

All kids throw tantrums. It's the entire context that bothers me. 

Yeah if the kid is being a brat and crying because he didn't get candy or something,  that's one thing.   Crying because his dad is leaving is just sad.   

[GotThatFire 166]

1 minute ago, dingleberryswitzer said:

Yeah if the kid is being a brat and crying because he didn't get candy or something,  that's one thing.   Crying because his dad is leaving because dad cares more about Joseph Ossai is just sad.   

fify 

[Get ln My Van 927]

Watching Hamm’s Karma unfold is a beautiful sight. 12/10 would watch again.

[jebusshuttlecock 200]

How could you watch and film your son crying like that and then just leave to go see a high school boy play football? Not only that, but then be so content with your actions that you decide to post the video on the internet?? Shit makes me ragey. 
 

Why couldn't he just take the kid to the game? Seems like a very obvious solution if Hamm has to go

[C-Man 27,230]

4 minutes ago, jebusshuttlecock said:

1 hour ago, GotThatFire said:

How could you watch and film your son crying like that and then just leave to go see a high school boy play football? Not only that, but then be so content with your actions that you decide to post the video on the internet?? Shit makes me ragey. 
 

Why couldn't he just take the kid to the game? Seems like a very obvious solution if Hamm has to go

My guess is Hamm fancies himself a member of the press and has worked his way into press box access. No way would I subject people there for more legit reasons than Hammster to a child that young. Then again, he has proved himself to not be the most professional person in this line of business.

[Dbeasy 15,051]

I’m so lost on this thread. Why are embarrassing instant messages between this psycho lady and Hamm showing up publicly? And who is this psycho? I long for the old days when it was just 0 for every pick.

[Orange&White 5,528]

Just now, Dbeasy said:

I long for the old days when it was just 0 for every pick.

Well you're n luck because he still does that!

[BigBenBamboozle 1,952]

We're officially through the looking glass here.  Gotdammit if I can't stop following this irrational rumpus.

[Vertigo 20,287]

2 hours ago, Tired of Lurking said:

I wonder if BC is sliding it in the buns. 

Edited June 13, 2018 by Vertigo

[Vertigo 20,287]

2 hours ago, Hanrahan said:

Hamm’s divorce looks nasty. Bunch of documents under seal and a mutual restraining order.

Let's not do this.. No reason to make anything public. 

[RabidM 2,668]

3 hours ago, Vertigo said:

Could I venture a guess as to why she left? She wants him to grow up and get a big boy job and be home with the kinds and he wants to chase high school boys around the state and be on the road sniffing jocks? Just a guess. Also, what a fucking rube if he actually sacrificed his family for his continued attempts at this worthless industry. I truly hope that is not the case for all of their sakes.

You know she has to be the reason he got his real estate licence in the first place.  She was probably trying to guide him to a better paying career where he could spend more time with his kids.  There's no way he'd do that on his own when he literally thought he was the best out of anyone at his profession anywhere.  He probably made promises while getting his licence and she probably believed him.  But when he gets his licence, he doesn't leave his 247 job... tension in the household.  Then 247 finally fires him and he still doesn't start working in real estate and tries to start some new, crappier paying venture to still cover recruiting... He chooses his obsession over his family.  She gives up.  Him, being who he is, gets highly defensive and feels victimized by her, like he did nothing wrong and goes on the attack being petty, aggressive and extremely viscous... like he does with everyone he perceives as taking a shot at him.  Nasty divorce... kids suffer. 

Edited June 13, 2018 by RabidM

[Hanrahan 1,306]

Let's not do this.. No reason to make anything public. 

It’s already public, by definition. I looked it up on a public database.

[nycHorn 3,011]

Hamm is a douche as well as an aggy.  Isn't that punishment enough?

[UT Lawnghorn 758]

JFC reading the last 3 pages of this thread at once is unbelievably disturbing. Karen drunk texting Hamm she's naked was bad enough but all this creepy divorce speculation took it to another level. 

[UTYoungblood 4]

Hamm is such a stubborn, hard-headed person. All of this stems from him not realizing his mistakes and at least trying to be better. Unfortunately it will only get worse until he puts his ego aside an learns the error of his ways - if ever. 

[Vertigo 20,287]

9 minutes ago, Hanrahan said:

It’s already public, by definition. I looked it up on a public database.

So are your property taxes, but I don't go posting those out on the internet for all to see. 

Edited June 13, 2018 by Vertigo

[Scholz 11,943]

Hey, bathroom boy,

 

 

[Dr. Teeth 5,844]

He gives us enough ammo with his recruiting site and predictions. Probably should leave it at that.

[lemonandaturd 4,285]

Kind of looks like Hamm has his life priorities in this order:

1.  aggy sports

2.  aggy scoop

3. aggy recruit jock sniffing

4.  family

[Pato del Muerto 52,503]

6 minutes ago, lemonandaturd said:

Kind of looks like Hamm has his life priorities in this order:

1.  aggy sports

2.  aggy scoop

3. aggy recruit jock sniffing

worryimg about EJ holland, Bryan carrington, and tom herman

4.  family

Additional content added

[C-Man 27,230]

Hamm is a dumbass who brings a lot of this upon himself. But he doesn't seem to be a malicious person. He's an uber-fan in a job that generally requires at least the air of partisanship. Figurelli, by comparison, is a vile, petty, piece of absolute roach excrement.

[Machinator 32,099]

Courtesy of Frenzy:

"Hamm chat notes

Hamm said Gbenda does not have a spot.

Thanks Karen for the Whiskey. Herman & the Texas staff are very unethical.

Texas 2018 signees are a bunch of me first guys & Thinks class will be a bust.

Texas staff is blatantly lying to recruits & recruits know it "

[Tex Pete 20,354]

3 hours ago, lemonandaturd said:

Kind of looks like Hamm has his life priorities in this order:

1.  aggy sports

2.  aggy scoop

3. aggy recruit jock sniffing

4.  family

Turdition.

Not sure why any of y’all think Hamm’s weirdness is anything but typical for the Aggy of Texas A&M. 

[Chuckie Finster 22,694]

Courtesy of Frenzy:
"Hamm chat notes
Hamm said Gbenda does not have a spot.
Thanks Karen for the Whiskey. Herman & the Texas staff are very unethical.
Texas 2018 signees are a bunch of me first guys & Thinks class will be a bust.
Texas staff is blatantly lying to recruits & recruits know it "

I was legitimately feeling bad for Hamm for a little while, but fuck that guy. He makes it impossible to feel any sympathy for him.

[Radical Larry 28,623]

Magda is going to drunk text him some nudes tonight. 

[williemackgarza 1,826]

Fuck that piece of shit. Post the divorce docs.
Finish him!


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Pro

[Tex Pete 20,354]

5 minutes ago, Radical Larry said:

Magda is going to drunk text him some nudes tonight. 

Exactly who I thought of. Or this chick:

[texasstrong12 4,668]

Texas has a bunch of "me first" guys yet Hamm loves him some Leon O'neal. 

Fucking hilarious. 

[golfclap 6,903]

When that dude was trying to fire up the Cougs247 page he couldn't stop sucking Herman and the entire staff off there and at Aggy247. does he truly think no one remembers that shit? 

 

me-first guys? the Texas 2018 class? wrong fucking tree right there. If you're gonna fabricate some shit at least make sure it doesn't fly in the face of everything that's happening right now on campus. Midget needs to have at least 1 source up at Texas. He could have picked over-rated or something. 9 or 10 of those guys have been here for MONTHS. 

 

lying piece of shit. his kids are better off. 

[tx ind 7,013]

Following high school kids around to the point it causes your family to go bust sounds like me first. 

[Sejjr 3,246]

Me First > aggy first

[texaslong 678]

1 hour ago, texasstrong12 said:

Texas has a bunch of "me first" guys yet Hamm loves him some Leon O'neal. 

Fucking hilarious. 

It's just like listening to aggy tell everyone that Texas is arrogant. Pretty sure I've never met a more arrogant fan base than aggy. They proclaim to be the best, while not winning jack shit.

[Butch Had Not 2,971]

 He just doubles down every time. No wonder his wife left him.  It doesn't matter how often you are right,  your wife is never wrong. Learn that and you will be golden.  Fight it and you will be Taylor Hamm. 

[CL Horn 32]

wonder how Rush feels about hammster posting Karens stuff about being whisky naked for all to see out there...this guy is such a clown and so unprofessional. Good job on the rayburn scoop to aggy too...visit aggy - proceeds to immediate commit to Clemson right after the trip LOL

[Hanrahan 1,306]

His bitch fucks?

[Hanrahan 1,306]

Ex bitch, I guess?

[UDontKnow 10,446]

2 hours ago, Butch Had Not said:

 He just doubles down every time. No wonder his wife left him.  It doesn't matter how often you are right,  your wife is never wrong. Learn that and you will be golden.  Fight it and you will be Taylor Hamm. 

I probably missed this. But did Taylor Hamm's wife actually leave him? 

[Butch Had Not 2,971]

1 minute ago, UDontKnow said:

I probably missed this. But did Taylor Hamm's wife actually leave him? 

 starts on page 22 with krazy Karen announcing she is looking for someone for hammster. 

Enjoy

[UDontKnow 10,446]

27 minutes ago, Butch Had Not said:

 starts on page 22 with krazy Karen announcing she is looking for someone for hammster. 

Enjoy

Welp, that's what I get for missing a day on Surly.

And this is the ex's Twitter page: https://twitter.com/AggieCher

"My day job is in sales, my full time job is being a momma"

EDIT: 

Seems that they were married for about 5 years tops? https://registry.theknot.com/cheryl-livingston-taylor-hamm-march-2013-tx/10332007

The statistics show that leading cause of divorce in most couples is financial issues. Divorced within a year of being shitcanned by 247? Coincidence, I think not. I shouldn't feel sorry for that ass flute, but I pity him for being such a regard. He's lost damn nearly everything and he's still a first class idiot of the most monumental proportions. He will never change.

EDIT2:

Why would Cheryl Livingston possibly go by Cheryl Bonbright?

https://www.whitepages.com/name/Cheryl-Livingston/TX (see the 1st entry...and who is Brian J. Bonbright? Did Taylor Hamm officially become a cuck?)

Edited June 14, 2018 by UDontKnow

[GotThatFire 166]

Taylor Hamm’s kids are already calling Brian Bonbright “Daddy”, just as I suspected. All is well with Mommy and the kiddos. 

Meanwhile,

aggy top coach is a cuck

aggy top fan is a cuck

classic aggy

[RabidM 2,668]

Wow... it's so hard to imagine someone cheating on Taylor Hamm.  Next you'll tell me someone cheated on Helen of Troy too. 

[ShaggyBevo RIP 3,868]

9 hours ago, Machinator said:

Courtesy of Frenzy:

Texas staff is blatantly lying to recruits & recruits know it "

I'm going to guess this is a aggy invention since the 2018 Texas' class pretty much all said Texas was the most open and honest staff they dealt with. 

Edited June 14, 2018 by ShaggyBevo RIP