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6figs/"Trust the Hamm" greatest hits

Machinator

By Machinator
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Aggy h8tr
Aggy h8tr

You're welcome   

Sejjr
Sejjr
Pato del Muerto
Pato del Muerto

It’s because he predicted that she’d stay with him. 

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Neonmoon

Neonmoon 38130

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, lemonandaturd said:

This old aggy hag from Flarda does not know shit about Texas.  If she thinks this staff is hand wringing she is as clueless as Jimbo is short.  

She moved across country to follow a college football coach. Having a clue went bye bye a looooooong time ago 

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Neonmoon

Neonmoon 38130

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Oh stewardess, I speak Daddy98

"Hamm eats Cheddar to the biggest Cheese supplier. It's not hard to figure out. Sometimes folks don't always know what's going on."

This means

Hamm gets his information from the biggest information supplier (aka the Footwoork King), the person invovled in Shepherd recruitment. It's not hard to figure out because Hamm's main sources are trainers (because he hangs out at their facilities all the time "supplying industry knowledge", talking them up to every player he ever encounters and in return they tell him recruiting knowledge that he sells to his facebook friends. His other sources are A&M players/commits/heavy aggy leans. Sometimes folks (aka the Footwork King) don't always know what's going on. So Daddy 98 is implying the Footwork King doesn't know where Shepherd wants to go or is leaning. 

 

 

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ShowmeyourTDs

ShowmeyourTDs 1160

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I think he means that since the toilet smurf is a fake reporter, recruiting coordinator, realtor, or whatever the hell it is that he fancies himself as this week he doesn’t always have time to eat cheese.  When he does he prefers Velveeta due to its longevity as a major cheese supplier.  However, the smurf doesn’t realize that it is not real cheese.

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rickyspub

rickyspub 801

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1 hour ago, Irwin F Fletcher said:

I believe it translate to......."toilet smurf has recently consumed too much cheese and his bowels are locked up and hasn't been able to shit update his facebook followers in over a week."

I thought it meant that Hamm was eating Karen's moldy snatch and that Daddy's saying, 'Don't knock it till you try it.'

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NameAlreadyInUse

NameAlreadyInUse 5178

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I remember being sad that Hamm got fired from 247 because we were going to lose the comedy.  I haven't looked at this thread in awhile, thinking it must be a bunch of rehashing of his greatest hits, but I'm catching up, still back on page 18, and I needed to respond to the thread to comment that I never should've ever doubted him.  Hamm fucking delivers no matter his platform!

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Katfid54

Katfid54 9005

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3 minutes ago, NameAlreadyInUse said:

I remember being sad that Hamm got fired from 247 because we were going to lose the comedy.  I haven't looked at this thread in awhile, thinking it must be a bunch of rehashing of his greatest hits, but I'm catching up, still back on page 18, and I needed to respond to the thread to comment that I never should've ever doubted him.  Hamm fucking delivers no matter his platform!

And you haven't even gotten to the divorce stuff yet.

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Vertigo

Vertigo 20502

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2 minutes ago, Butch Had Not said:

I love that he still uses crystal balls like he's still getting points. 

Crystal Ball points to Hamm = Rep points to Rocko

 

A measurable sense of self worth to the rest of the world. I would bet Rocko still goes to Shaggy to check his rep. 

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totallynotabuttpirate

totallynotabuttpirate 5492

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Yep, it's been confirmed that Hamm's wife got so sick of him and the rest of the aggies, she filed for divorce started bangin her brother, who's a Longhorn. 

6 minutes ago, NameAlreadyInUse said:

I remember being sad that Hamm got fired from 247 because we were going to lose the comedy.  I haven't looked at this thread in awhile, thinking it must be a bunch of rehashing of his greatest hits, but I'm catching up, still back on page 18, and I needed to respond to the thread to comment that I never should've ever doubted him.  Hamm fucking delivers no matter his platform!

2 minutes ago, Katfid54 said:

And you haven't even gotten to the divorce stuff yet.

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SimkinsMan

SimkinsMan 4555

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8 minutes ago, NameAlreadyInUse said:

I remember being sad that Hamm got fired from 247 because we were going to lose the comedy.  I haven't looked at this thread in awhile, thinking it must be a bunch of rehashing of his greatest hits, but I'm catching up, still back on page 18, and I needed to respond to the thread to comment that I never should've ever doubted him.  Hamm fucking delivers no matter his platform!

It gets weirder in the 20s. Much weirder.

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ShowmeyourTDs

ShowmeyourTDs 1160

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Butch Had Not said:

I love that he still uses crystal balls like he's still getting points. 

G-ma Karen rubs his crystal balls in front of a life size cutout of The Brew-Dawg in a funny hat while Baggins watches with his hands tied behind his back.  It’s magic not science.

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Chopper

Chopper 17450

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Posted

Gotta admit, if I were looking for a house in College Station where I could rub elbows with aggy football players, watch them work out and get sweaty, maybe even spot the Marine sneaking out of one of their bedroom windows every once in a while, you can bet realtor Hamm would be my first call. 

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