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The Batshit Insane QAnon Conspiracy Theory

Hugo Stiglitz

By Hugo Stiglitz
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is texags still up?

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My eyes have been opened to several things over the last four years: The U.S. is A LOT more racist than I thought. U.S. citizens are a lot dumber than I thought. Destroying the ent

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Gil Bang

Gil Bang 25944

Posted
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5 hours ago, Horn Under a Bad Sign said:

If you looked anything like JFK Jr. you could walk through that crowd and take them for all they are worth.

 

If I looked like JFK Jr. I'd be so busy with prime pussy I wouldn't have time for these assholes.

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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Do the Q-dipshits have an explanation for what happened to his wife?  I mean, was the whole plane crash faked and she's also alive?  Or was he the only one who made it out of the crash?  Or did they both survive a legit plane crash and then he killed her so as to re-establish his family's regime, unfettered?  Or was his plane fettered?  

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Pato del Muerto

Pato del Muerto 52489

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11 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Do the Q-dipshits have an explanation for what happened to his wife?  I mean, was the whole plane crash faked and she's also alive?  Or was he the only one who made it out of the crash?  Or did they both survive a legit plane crash and then he killed her so as to re-establish his family's regime, unfettered?  Or was his plane fettered?  

Wasn’t the faked crash conspiracy a thing pretty much right after it happened?  Strange radar, no wreckage found or some shit?  I feel like Q just co-opts existing nut job theories and incorporates them into whatever this is that they have going. 

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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I don't remember.  I didn't care at the time and still don't.  But I guess that would make sense because I have been wondering why they attached themselves to that particular "high profile faked death."  Why latch onto their "conservative" movement to a family that was fiscally conservative, but very progressive in many other respects?  I guess they just needed to find some big political name to pretend was their Q, somebody who get inside-baseball intel from D.C.  

You'd think though...that if you wanted to infiltrate a child blood-drinking political Swamp cartel, walking in there looking exactly like JFK, Jr. would be kind of a giveaway.  

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Bevo14

Bevo14 8304

Posted
Posted (edited)
50 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Do the Q-dipshits have an explanation for what happened to his wife?  I mean, was the whole plane crash faked and she's also alive?  Or was he the only one who made it out of the crash?  Or did they both survive a legit plane crash and then he killed her so as to re-establish his family's regime, unfettered?  Or was his plane fettered?  

Come on, man. How could you forget the facts like this. Obviously the martians kidnapped her before the flight and replaced her with a hologram. She'll be descending on us with an army of Sardaukar and Ulysses Grant sitting on her shoulders, ready to wage war in the name of Trump.

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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 105095

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So...to recap today.  I got an assistant football coach at my beloved University's football program, who is common-law married to a stripper who claims her "emotional support" monkey is legally allowed to dance on-stage with her and eat children.  I got the Rolling Stones working in league with JFK, Jr. tonight at the Cotton Bowl, where said football program's season went off the rails, to reinstall the most failed President in U.S. history.  And I just got invited by Mackowiak to a downtown rally tonight, to protest the City of Austin's Prop A election results in the event they don't win (and it's looking that way).  
Just another fucking Timeline Tuesday.  

The most unbelievable part of that post is that we live in a world where Mackowiak exists.

And one in which he used to be my friend. Wtf?
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ROFL BOX

ROFL BOX 6649

Posted
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2 hours ago, Brisketexan said:


The most unbelievable part of that post is that we live in a world where Mackowiak exists.

And one in which he used to be my friend. Wtf?

I would occasionally see back & forth posts between the two of you on FB (with my old / pre-Borked-by-FB 12 year old profile)... was there a serious falling out between the two of you?  Did he finally just go ahead & eat the [Trumper] Orange pill?

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hookemATL

hookemATL 11714

Posted
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2 minutes ago, ROFL BOX said:

I would occasionally see back & forth posts between the two of you on FB (with my old / pre-Borked-by-FB 12 year old profile)... was there a serious falling out between the two of you?  Did he finally just go ahead & eat the [Trumper] Orange pill?

Sex always complicates things. Should have kept it platonic. 

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Gatorubet

Gatorubet 30213

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I literally went into the attic of a disgusting (hoarding conditions) mentally ill persons house today to make sure there wasn’t people living in her attic or stealing parts from her car. This lady is more sane than these Q fucks.

Wow.

Sounds like what somebody who got hit by a guy swinging a muffler in an attic would say.
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MaybeACoordinator

MaybeACoordinator 8349

Posted
Posted (edited)
11 hours ago, Lobo said:

I don't remember.  I didn't care at the time and still don't.  But I guess that would make sense because I have been wondering why they attached themselves to that particular "high profile faked death."  Why latch onto their "conservative" movement to a family that was fiscally conservative, but very progressive in many other respects?  I guess they just needed to find some big political name to pretend was their Q, somebody who get inside-baseball intel from D.C.  

You'd think though...that if you wanted to infiltrate a child blood-drinking political Swamp cartel, walking in there looking exactly like JFK, Jr. would be kind of a giveaway.  

There is this one pic taken at Mar-A-Lago in '96

portrait-of-american-lawyer-and-publishe

 

If you can remember the NY media back in 1996, one or both of those dudes was in every other picture that made it out of there. Not quite Kardashian level but similar -- everybody knew who JFK Jr was even though he hadn't really done anything of note but win the daddy lottery, slay high class East Coast pussy by the yachtload, and run a mediocre Vanity Fair-type magazine. He had a charmed life. 

I think this was around the time Trump was bottoming out -- long before The Apprentice doomed us to his big comeback. By this time he was more famous for being famous and as a shill than any kind of real dealmaker. They were both famous for being famous and those kinds of people tend to have their pictures taken a lot, apart and together...

But these idiots have allowed this one pic to spawn an entire branch of the Q faith. One sort of encouraging thing is that there are many sects already in the Q religion -- some of them think the whole JFK Jr thing is as crazy as it seems to normal people. We can but hope that they might descend into savage internecine warfare, as we sometimes see from Shia vs Sunni and Catholics vs Protestants. 

 

Edited by MaybeACoordinator
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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89650

Posted
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1 hour ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

But these idiots have allowed this one pic to spawn an entire branch of the Q faith. One sort of encouraging thing is that there are many sects already in the Q religion -- some of them think the whole JFK Jr thing is as crazy as it seems to normal people. We can but hope that they might descend into savage internecine warfare, as we sometimes see from Shia vs Sunni and Catholics vs Protestants. 

Asked the Qanon in-law and her bf if they were in Dallas for JFK Jr's unveiling, and her response was "no, if you look at the official Qanon outlets, this is a fake operation created by the media."

My next question: "Do you believe JFK Jr is still alive?"

Qanon in-law: *crickets chirp*

Me: "So you believe he's alive, and the people in Dallas believe he's alive, and so now we are just discussing where he actually is."

Qanon in-law: *crickets chirp*

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MaybeACoordinator

MaybeACoordinator 8349

Posted
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I feel for y'all in Dallas proper, I really do...Y'all need to coordinate regionwide and create one single northern 'burb to herd them all into so they can be monitored and perhaps turned against each other. Give them quasi-freedom, similar to a tribal nation, and partially revoke their US citizenship. They must get Q Passports and pay to leave their little lunatic nation for their jobs here. Or maybe they will just all sell each other real estate constantly.

 

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Pescado_Rojo

Pescado_Rojo 19416

Posted
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48 minutes ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

I feel for y'all in Dallas proper, I really do...Y'all need to coordinate regionwide and create one single northern 'burb to herd them all into so they can be monitored and perhaps turned against each other. Give them quasi-freedom, similar to a tribal nation, and partially revoke their US citizenship. They must get Q Passports and pay to leave their little lunatic nation for their jobs here. Or maybe they will just all sell each other real estate constantly.

 

Isn't that the entire Wine Mom MLM economy in a nutshell? 

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ROFL BOX

ROFL BOX 6649

Posted
Posted




My next question: "Do you believe JFK Jr is still alive?"
Qanon in-law: *crickets chirp*
Me: "So you believe he's alive, and the people in Dallas believe he's alive, and so now we are just discussing where he actually is."
Qanon in-law: *crickets chirp*


Reminds me of this old joke:

Guy @ hotel bar, chats up attractive girl / lady:
"Hey, for $ 15,000.00, would you come up to my room for some sex?

Lady: "Um... what? Hmm, I'd have to think about that..."

Guy: "What about for $ 100?"

Lady: "What?? One hundred? What kind of woman do you think I am?"

Guy: "We have already established that, now we're just haggling."

Sent from my SM-G950U1 using Tapatalk

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Genco

Genco 3040

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Posted
2 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

Me: "So you believe he's alive, and the people in Dallas believe he's alive, and so now we are just discussing where he actually is."

Qanon in-law: *crickets chirp*

Remind her that there is a referenceable Q drop that specifically debunks the JFK Jr. is alive conspiracy. Or maybe she doubts the plan and Q himself.

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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That's fucking awesome.  

By the way, kind of on-topic...but if Steve is already in Texas right now for the Dealey Plaza reveal...we've got a monkey situation that's kinda time-sensitive.  

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Bevo14

Bevo14 8304

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On 11/2/2021 at 6:43 PM, Leeroy Jenkins said:


I am not sure of that. But apparently people break into her shit infested house (which is in a really nice subdivision) and have orgies.

Still more sane than these Q fucks.

You better be the first one there every time or username does not check out.

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Shaddie

Shaddie 1651

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I will admit that maybe I choose to believe most of these people are not mentally ill, but doing a bit. Am I that far off base? Like the chick in the interview. Has to be a bit right? 
 

Has there been a documentary on these people? I would watch it just to answer my own questions. 

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Lurch

Lurch 5930

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I will admit that maybe I choose to believe most of these people are not mentally ill, but doing a bit. Am I that far off base? Like the chick in the interview. Has to be a bit right? 
 
Has there been a documentary on these people? I would watch it just to answer my own questions. 

Doc is on HBO
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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89650

Posted
Posted
4 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Lotta moving parts to this one. I do worry that some countries might mistakenly take the global martial law declaration and attempts to arrest their leaders as an act of war. 

Depends on if their leaders are gay or not. Or maybe it's if those countries are gay.  I always mix up the two.   Lots of Q stuff revolves around hating the gays.

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Shaddie

Shaddie 1651

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8 minutes ago, atomheartbevo said:

Depends on if their leaders are gay or not. Or maybe it's if those countries are gay.  I always mix up the two.   Lots of Q stuff revolves around hating the gays.

Dude, don’t you realize gays peeing in non gay restrooms cause the world to tilt out of bounds thus causing global warming that non gays refute because lizard people tell them it isn’t happening because lizard people are waiting for JFK jr. to rule the world. Do some fucking research and you will see the light. 

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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89650

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9 minutes ago, Shaddie said:

Holy shit. Just realized something. 

I just realized that every time I think about writing some batshit stuff to feed my qanon relative, it's far too tame compared to what's actually out there.

Like if I wrote "UT football will win 10 games next season!", it's a little believable to some.

But if I thought like a qanon grifter, I would would write "UT football will win 23 games next season!"  Now that's physically impossible, but that's just it - they aren't invested in in the mundane shit that is bound by reality.  The more unbelievable the better, because in their minds, they aren't thinking "that's physically impossible", they are thinking "well that is such a wild number that I don't think he'd say that unless he had inside information that is going to blow everybody's minds when it's revealed!"

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