Dallas Cowboys 2020 Offseason Thread -- 25th Anniversary of Mediocrity

[Hate 20,232]

That would be the most Jerry hire ever.

[Junior Miller 1,502]

The fucker's contract is running out. There doesn't have to be some grand announcement and press conference of a firing. Just put out a statement to the press saying Garrett's contract will not be renewed and they are currently in search for a new coaching staff. 

These arky fucksticks could fuck up the simplest of things. 

[michaelpshayes 417]

25 minutes ago, clapclapclap said:

My sources say Garrett will be allowed to wrap up his work tomorrow, things like exit interviews, etc.

 

(But my sources are some spare fill-in hosts on The Ticket about 6:30 tonite, so....)

his work is done...he's been around the franchise for a total of  20 fucking years or something, made millions of dollars got a super bowl ring and now he failed at his job ...it ain't sad ...get the fuck out ,...exit interviews? fuck my life 

that shit ass arkansas hillbilly can't even fire a coach right ....

it's such a fucked up franchise from top to bottom they don't do one thing like a normal NFL team .....

 

[Chico_SA 528]

 

[Surly Bevo 25,655]

This delay is one big "I'm going to do things my way" fuck you to the fans, media, etc.  That or the dumbfuck is really thinking about how he packages keeping him around.  Because unless it is the "fuck you" there is no other logical reason for the delay (to the point above about making a simple announcement of non-renewal and a coaching search for the new guy is under way) . 

Edited December 31, 2019 by Surly Bevo

[Loch Ness Monster 3,533]

Smh. Get rid of him already!!!

[Vic Mackey 47,847]

Go fuck yourself you old senile dumb fucking bitch

 

[Surly Bevo 25,655]

Just now, Vic Mackey said:

Go fuck yourself you old senile dumb fucking bitch

 

No shit Vic, plenty of people step down and "fire" themselves when they realize they no longer have it. Whatever "it" happens to be, talent, desire, time, etc.  Newsflash Jerry you fucking suck.

[JimmyJames 12,271]

21 minutes ago, Vic Mackey said:

Go fuck yourself you old senile dumb fucking bitch

 

That quote from Jerry sums it all up pretty nicely.

Im glad I figured it out several years ago and just stopped caring. I’ll start giving a shit again when Jerry ain’t the GM. Not holding my breath.

[JimmyJames 12,271]

Look boss. I might do better. If I can. Otherwise, you can’t fire me anyway, so whatevs.

[blacklab 12,049]

Quote

you go do it better if you can.

but he can't do any better.

Quote

You don’t fire yourself.

yes, you do. Lots of business owners fire themselves and hire someone else to run their business. It's pretty common.

[mdmost 43,851]

Ha. He’s just going to trade one puppet for a new one. He’s convinced he’s always just one _____ away from that “gloryhole”. Every other GM on the planet gets fired for this much mediocrity. But not when the Jones clan are in charge. I’ve said before, this franchise goes nowhere until Jerry is no longer with us. We are the NFC version of the Oakland Raiders with a better stadium.

Edited December 31, 2019 by mdmost

[Iceman 2,956]

“Hey Jimmy, please respond to my text.  How the hell did you make it look so easy to cut players all the time? I haven’t a clue how to do this...”

[Surly Bevo 25,655]

4 minutes ago, mdmost said:

 with a better stadium.

Not for long...

[Pato del Muerto 53,332]

5 minutes ago, Surly Bevo said:

Not for long...

Ayup

[michaelpshayes 417]

go ahead and just bring that red headed fuckstick back to spite everyone..... he wants to sooooooo bad 

[Randolph Duke 4,034]

1 hour ago, Surly Bevo said:

No shit Vic, plenty of people step down and "fire" themselves when they realize they no longer have it. Whatever "it" happens to be, talent, desire, time, etc.  Newsflash Jerry you fucking suck.

As I have repeatedly stated, Jerry doesn’t have a winning organization for the simple reason Jerry isn’t willing to do everything in his power to win. Winning doesn’t mean enough to him. If he truly was willing to do everything in his power, he would fire himself. 

[dcar00 14,904]

he has to be trolling at this point. you can be dumb and still make money.

[Randolph Duke 4,034]

1 hour ago, Surly Bevo said:

No shit Vic, plenty of people step down and "fire" themselves when they realize they no longer have it. Whatever "it" happens to be, talent, desire, time, etc.  Newsflash Jerry you fucking suck.

As I have repeatedly stated, Jerry doesn’t have a winning organization for the simple reason Jerry isn’t willing to do everything in his power to win. Winning doesn’t mean enough to him. If he truly was willing to do everything in his power, he would fire himself. 

[Junior Miller 1,502]

If the eagles had lost and Garrett backdoored his way into the playoffs no way Jones fires his ass. Hell he's trying to figure out a way to weasel out of firing him now. Cowboys fans need to take a page from redskins fans. Their faans are awesome and just stopped showing up to the point tickets to regular season games were selling for like $6. Do that shit to Jerry and shit would change really fast. Cowboys fans aren't that smart though. 

[Surly Bevo 25,655]

If the tickets are selling for 6 dollars that means they are in the secondary market and Danny has his money.

Unfortunately corporate entertainment is what pays a big part of the bills at Jerryworld and that isn’t going anywhere. Fans have to stop buying gear stop watching to drive ratings down, eschew any place that partners with Jerry turn off media that spends too much time on the Cowboys blah blah blah and if that hasn’t already happened it never will. people love a fucking soap opera.

[dcar00 14,904]

jerry doesn't care about ticket sales to Dallas fans because half the building is the opposing teams fans at this point.  

[ChiTownDoc 21,325]

You don’t fire yourself?  Nobody does?  JFC, he really is senile.  

[youdunnf'dup 2,147]

4 hours ago, Randolph Duke said:

As I have repeatedly stated, Jerry doesn’t have a winning organization for the simple reason Jerry isn’t willing to do everything in his power to win. Winning doesn’t mean enough to him. If he truly was willing to do everything in his power, he would fire himself. 

This is the unfortunate truth. As long as that bottom line results in the most valuable sports franchise on the planet, why the fuck would Jerry fire himself. 

[Landomatic 3,813]

Jerrah gonna hire Urban Meyer.  He finally realizes the only successful coaching hires he ever made were Jimmy and Switzer, so why not recreate the situation.  Given the other candidates out there (or lack thereof), the fact that Urban is basically Jimmy/Switzer 3.0 and sitting there available, and that Urban has straight up already said that if the Cowboys come calling, you take that job all day...this is seems like a no-brainer.  May already be done. 

[Iceman 2,956]

All of the "Jerry hasn't don it yet, and he's fucking with us" posts are making me laugh.

1) as if the motherfucker has ever done things on the schedule of the fans

2) as if it makes a difference as to who replaces Garrett

3) as if some earth-shattering announcement is coming... nothing short of Jerry announcing new head coach will have GM responsibilities and a guaranteed 5 year contract  is going to mean anything significant is changing

[Lidig8r 1,904]

Maybe Garrett is just being reassigned within the athletic department.

He will be placed in charge of alumni relations and ordering hot dogs.

[Viper 12,212]

1 hour ago, Landomatic said:

Jerrah gonna hire Urban Meyer.  He finally realizes the only successful coaching hires he ever made were Jimmy and Switzer, so why not recreate the situation.  Given the other candidates out there (or lack thereof), the fact that Urban is basically Jimmy/Switzer 3.0 and sitting there available, and that Urban has straight up already said that if the Cowboys come calling, you take that job all day...this is seems like a no-brainer.  May already be done. 

wtf? I could have coached that team to a win. and I was 13 at the time.

[Ghost of Shag 2,723]

He’s not gonna get rid of him, is he......

[Irish Wrist Watch 1,470]

Clappy should be saying his goodbyes right about now. Word should reach the street as soon as the first player gets to his cell phone.

[Vic Mackey 47,847]

[Mo Horn 8,933]

26 minutes ago, Irish Wrist Watch said:

Clappy should be saying his goodbyes right about now. Word should reach the street as soon as the first player gets to his cell phone.

Meeting with the team at noon. 

[Vic Mackey 47,847]

Fucking clown show

 

 

[Mo Horn 8,933]

 

[Redneck Mutha 8,158]

So is he gone yet?  And by "he", I mean that shit for brains owner/GM.

[Vic Mackey 47,847]

Exchanging info to keep in touch? How do they not already have that stuff?

[Junior Miller 1,502]

Jane Slater is 100 percent useless without her hotness. She just thought "what would I do if I was about to leave the company" and attributed it to Garrett. Everyone there already had his number. 

[Patrick Bateman 3,966]

I don't really care if they give Garrett a day to say his goodbyes out of respect, but we better be already on the hunt for a new HC with back channeling.  We should be lining up interviews with Riley, Rhule, and whoever else we want to talk to.

[Junior Miller 1,502]

"After self evaluation I uhhhh realized that... in previous years I would have fired the head football coach after uhhhhh... a season this disappointing. Therefore uhhhh.... I have decided to give Jason Garrett a 3 year extension to remain head football coach". 

[Hagbard Celine 11,160]

1 hour ago, Patrick Bateman said:

we better be already on the hunt for a new HC with back channeling.  We should be lining up interviews with Riley, Rhule, and whoever else we want to talk to.

Rhule's name hasn't even been mentioned because the first thing he said was "full control - all or none".  The Browns publicly made him say no, and now the Browns as of this minute look like they are going to ditch their GM.

No doubt Stephen is calling agents... "will your client work for our current GM?"

Rhule's agent clearly said no fucking way.

Until others are named and decline, their agent's response ipso facto has been and is "what does that mean?"

Until clappy is announced as gone my take is clappy is insurance against Joneses landing a big name "willing to work with the current GM".

[tx 3 putt 78,470]

Jerrah about to get some glory hole !!!!!

[Patrick Bateman 3,966]

27 minutes ago, Hagbard Celine said:

Rhule's name hasn't even been mentioned because the first thing he said was "full control - all or none".  The Browns publicly made him say no, and now the Browns as of this minute look like they are going to ditch their GM.

No doubt Stephen is calling agents... "will your client work for our current GM?"

Rhule's agent clearly said no fucking way.

Until others are named and decline, their agent's response ipso facto has been and is "what does that mean?"

Until clappy is announced as gone my take is clappy is insurance against Joneses landing a big name "willing to work with the current GM".

Rhule isn't getting full control in New York with Gettleman staying on but is interviewing with them.  And the Browns are in the midst of a power struggle between two guys who want the GM position and it looks like Dorsey will lose and DePodesta will be the full decision maker.  Not sure if the narrative about him needing full control is bluster, cover, or just misinterpreted.  I don't necessarily think he'll be the next coach of the Cowboys, but I think his agent certainly takes the call and we get an interview, if nothing more to drive up his price.

I knew Roman would get some burn for job openings, but we don't have Lamar Jackson on this roster.  Should/Could Dak's legs be used a little more?  Sure, but nothing like what the Ravens do.  The offense doesn't need to be overhauled, it probably just needs to be tweaked.  Special Teams needs to be overhauled.

 

Edited December 31, 2019 by Patrick Bateman

[Bullneck 19,454]

17 hours ago, Deej said:

We're getting Jeff Fisher, aren't we?

Deej, I've always like you until now.  Don't be spreading the bad Karma.

Edited December 31, 2019 by Bullneck

[Surly Bevo 25,655]

Thumbs up their asses....thumbs up their asses

[Gene Parmesan 4,062]

1 minute ago, Patrick Bateman said:

Rhule isn't getting full control in New York with Gettleman staying on but is interviewing with them.  And the Browns are in the midst of a power struggle between two guys who want the GM position and it looks like Dorsey will lose an DePodesta will be the full decision maker.  Not sure if the narrative about him needing full control is bluster, cover, or just misinterpreted.  I don't necessarily think he'll be the next coach of the Cowboys, but I think his agent certainly takes the call and we get an interview, if nothing more to drive up his price.

I knew Roman would get some burn for job openings, but we don't have Lamar Jackson on this roster.  Should/Could Dak's legs be used a little more?  Sure, but nothing like what the Ravens do.  The offense doesn't need to be overhauled, it probably just needs to be tweaked.  Special Teams needs to be overhauled.

 

Rhule doesn't want GM control, he just wouldn't want to work with Jerry.  That's the point of the fictional play you quoted.

[Junior Miller 1,502]

The old arky fuckstick was on the radio saying the problem with college coaches is their busiest workday is Sunday so they don't watch any NFL and know nothing of NFL personnel. So they take at least a year to get up to speed at NFL level which is why Jimmy went 1-15 year one. Does it mean he's not going with a college coach? Who knows. He's a moron  

[Junior Miller 1,502]

2 minutes ago, Gene Parmesan said:

Rhule doesn't want GM control, he just wouldn't want to work with Jerry.  That's the point of the fictional play you quoted.

Amazingly he apparently wants full control over his own roster to actually choose who plays and who doesn't. The nerve of some people. 

[Hagbard Celine 11,160]

4 minutes ago, Surly Bevo said:

Thumbs up their asses....thumbs up their asses

schechter/espn:

FAMILY.  FAMILY.

FAMILY.

stop confusing us with facts.

FAMILY.

[XYZ 2,154]

Jerrah hiring Jeff Fisher would be the ultimate troll move.

[Hagbard Celine 11,160]

4 minutes ago, Gene Parmesan said:

Rhule doesn't want GM control, he just wouldn't want to work with Jerry.  That's the point of the fictional play you quoted.

Maybe. Maybe not.

Maybe why haven't we heard the names connected?  It's the best possible choice other than Dabo or Belichick (in my opinion).