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Posted

"911 what is your emergency?"

 

"yeah I just got to my VIP cabana at ACL and they don't have the flavor of White Claw I prefer.  Why won't the cops allow Ubers closer to the gate so we can hit up Central Market?"  

  • Like 6
  • Haha 2
Posted
Used to think Liv Tyler was pretty hot. Now her face is Meg Ryan.
 
Edit: not watching, but I saw promos because they have been pimping for a while.
Yeah, she looks weird. Like an elf or
  • Like 1
Posted
20 minutes ago, longhornmatt said:

I flipped over to this for 5 minutes and saw some scenario that involved a baby in a car seat being launched from a rolling vehicle and landing in a tree unharmed.   Not the actual scene of that happening, which could have been amusing in a Sharknado way at least, but rather the aftermath where they’re just climbing a ladder to take a baby out of a fucking tree.

That was some the most cringeworthy television I’ve ever seen.  I mean, even with today’s low standards, I have to ask ... is this supposed to be serious?

Medical Police on Netflix is better written and produced.  

Posted

I mean its on FOX what did yall expect lol

The one chick got big tittays at least.

I enjoyed EMS and Fire fighting at the scene when a dude is dying from eating 1 bite of a pepper

Posted
1 hour ago, austingirl said:

Me: At least there's no one wearing a cowboy hat yet.

LS911: Texas Gerry Bertier rolls up with a white cowboy hat.

Me:

I just realized it's the guy who played Hoyt on True Blood and not the guy from Remember the Titans. My bad.

  • Like 2
Posted
2 hours ago, Red Five said:

I don't know what y'all are talking about, but whatever this is, I now really want to watch it. 

Well you are in luck good sir because this is a fabulous 2 night premiere event and you can catch another episode tonight at 7. 

  • Like 1
Posted

Why hasn't the success of Netflix, Hulu, and other streaming platforms caused a shakeup in the public channels to get better programming on the air? Shit shows like this only play into the hands of streaming services who rally around the idea that you need to pay for quality television.

Posted
24 minutes ago, HRSchenker said:

Why hasn't the success of Netflix, Hulu, and other streaming platforms caused a shakeup in the public channels to get better programming on the air? 

You've never lived out in the sticks where your internet speed is so shitty that streaming isn't an option? 

Posted

^

that reminds me, although it's a holiday...my shift at the oil refinery on Enfield starts in a few minutes.  Better get going.  

Posted
19 minutes ago, longhornmatt said:

The fuck?  How?

In tonight's episode, there is a plane crash caused by drunk cowboys in first class firing their guns into the air like Yosemite Sam, which causes the cabin to lose pressure.   Nobody is killed in the crash, but several people are hurt.  We then see exciting rescue scenes of moving small pieces of debris, unbuckling seatbelts, and putting those people onto stretchers.  But wait!   A group of orphaned child refugees from Syria were on the plane (as they were being relocated by a kind New York family that recently moved to Austin, despite protests by the locals).   They are missing!  What has happened to them?

It turns out that as the plane was going down, they were sucked out of the windows and went into freefall until they all landed on the top of an exhaust tower of an oil refinery in downtown Austin.  They seem to be unharmed, but in only 10 minutes the refinery is going to start up with the ... uh,  you know, refining process, and all that entails and such ... well, look, they're about to be roasted by an open flame of pollution.  The audience doesn't see any of this, but we are told what happened when our heroes arrive to the scene. 

Finally, in the big dramatic rescue scene, we will see Rob Lowe climbing up a ladder, and then ... walking out of the refinery with the kids, everything having gone according to plan.  There's a new sheriff in town, from New York, and he's going to teach Texans that they shouldn't shoot their guns on airplanes or kill children in refinery accidents anymore.  Everyone has learned a valuable lesson today.  They end the episode with the other firefighters ordering a bagel instead of a breakfast burrito, and Rob Lowe feels pride knowing that he's getting through to them.

Wait. Is that really the plot?  Or are you making this up?  I can’t tell 

Posted
15 minutes ago, Xian said:

Wait. Is that really the plot?  Or are you making this up?  I can’t tell 

You are not alone.  Based on how absolutely fucking terrible the first episode was, nothing would be a surprise.  

Posted
31 minutes ago, Deej said:

You've never lived out in the sticks where your internet speed is so shitty that streaming isn't an option? 

My parents still have dial up internet. I don't think my hometown is representative of most American households. Could be wrong but I doubt it.

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