Dumbass Shit on Nextdoor

[PhillyD 1257]

59 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

I can see it now:

 

Y'all! THERE'S A HUGE SNAPPING TURTLE IN MY YARD!!! DEADLY!!! 

you left out "possibly rabid"

[PilotsError 2287]

A $500 reward?  I'd be turtle napping that damn thing every week.

[Fred Willard 115]

Saw the following thread title: Real State Attorney Needed

Did not click.

[workswithseed 2110]

4 minutes ago, Fred Willard said:

Saw the following thread title: Real State Attorney Needed

Did not click.

She's trying to deal with real staters, and she's tired of doing it herself.

[shakahorn 1645]

2 hours ago, Fred Willard said:

Saw the following thread title: Real State Attorney Needed

Did not click.

Of course they are just looking for a prosecutor or maybe public defender.  A real one, not a fake one.

[Sawbonz 27565]

On 4/25/2018 at 6:12 PM, Sbbruin said:

We live in the foothills, so wildlife in the neighborhood is not unusual.  Lately there have been a number of bears cruising around:

 

People's reactions range from "call the national guard/won't someone think of the children" to "leave them alone, they were here first".  This even made the Today show last week.  

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5634807/Grandmother-quickly-grabs-granddaughter-runs-inside-bear-romps-California-yard.html

But how do they do vs spiral staircases?

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

On 4/28/2018 at 12:46 PM, Fred Willard said:

Saw the following thread title: Real State Attorney Needed

Did not click.

Real States: Texas

Not Real States: Oklahoma

[Apep 645]

This was deleted before I got a screenshot, but there was a great post on my NextDoor this weekend. A woman posted about an attempted carjacking involving her friend. The friend had stopped her car on a residential street to look up an address on her cellphone. Two white men walking down the street "aggressively" approached her car and tried to get in. She put the car in drive and fled. A few posts later, the rest of the story came out.

The men were not walking down the street. This woman happened to stop in front of a man's driveway at exactly the same time as the Uber app showed their Uber as arriving. So the man and his friend walked down the driveway and attempted to board what they thought was their Uber.

[Deej 76797]

And that woman was Ann Kitchen.

[CooterBrown 18014]

On 4/27/2018 at 2:20 PM, jimmyjazz said:

I don't even know what to make of this.  How do you lose a large turtle?  "Bruce" weighs 50 lb and is larger than most throw pillows, but somehow he sped away.

 

Please post that you made a giant pot of turtle gumbo from a turtle you caught on the green belt. 

[TXs 226]

My Nextdoor app is just people selling their used furniture for retail prices. The FB page is usually where the fun is tho. 

 

Edited May 1, 2018 by TXs

[Baboontyme 2812]

Someone just posted this.

 

Anna Lynn, Ferrini

RNM

How can a lawsuit keep keep delaying/continuing SO! say an expensive “eye camera device” is put into your eye and all info in the lawsuit that is to be sent to you via eyecambraindevice is always being moved and damaged by the human body surrounding it to top it off why should your lawsuit continue if the defendant Burned your eyes 2.5 years into an investigation showroom. This outrages me I don’t think lawsuits should continue they’ll lose please tell me if you agree that it should end the day the victims eyes are burned.

Edited 13m ago · 22 neighborhoods in General

[Player 4575]

That sounds like it was posted by someone who stays in Gretna, and who goes by the name of Gidget Lewis.

[Baboontyme 2812]

I replied and asked her to draw a diagram of this and post it. 

[Prepuce of Doom 21074]

16 hours ago, Baboontyme said:

Someone just posted this.

 

Anna Lynn, Ferrini

RNM

How can a lawsuit keep keep delaying/continuing SO! say an expensive “eye camera device” is put into your eye and all info in the lawsuit that is to be sent to you via eyecambraindevice is always being moved and damaged by the human body surrounding it to top it off why should your lawsuit continue if the defendant Burned your eyes 2.5 years into an investigation showroom. This outrages me I don’t think lawsuits should continue they’ll lose please tell me if you agree that it should end the day the victims eyes are burned.

Edited 13m ago · 22 neighborhoods in General

Please figure out where this neighbor lives and then start leaving bits and pieces of old electronics in her yard, mailbox, front porch, etc., then report back with the fireworks that ensue. 

Wear a disguise though - at one time, she probably had security cameras installed. 

Edited May 1, 2018 by Prepuce of Doom

[Prepuce of Doom 21074]

 

[AUS-97HORN 11765]

hot off the neighborhood page:

 

and as you can imagine.... imaginations and panic have run wild in the last 6 hours.

but stuff we know from her original post and the relatively quick follow up post.

#1-  its from THEIR OWN BACK YARD,  cant stress this enough, she posted this shit on the neighborhood forum for a single old dead stump that burned on its own last night

#2, her husband smokes, (we may have a clue here detectives)

and finally #3 it takes a while but her husband finally admits to maybe tossing a cigarette butt into the stump.

AND THEY CALLED THE FIRE DEPARTMENT TO COME BY AND PUT IT OUT:   yes boys and girls a fire buring IN THE GROUND, that obviously burned all night, needs the GD fire department to come out and pour water on the fucking fire, instead of using your fucking hose yourself.

 

but have no fear, we now have run-by arsons going down in the hood, everyone needs to be alert and awake!:

the stupid, it burns.

Gotta give the bonus detective shoutout to Adam Turner... like someone is actually going to sneak into your backyard, do NOTHING ELSE but set a fucking stump on fire and leave?

But hey, he doubles down on the stupid because he acts like he knows what the fuck he's talking about, but doesnt, and then gets confused when the (highly improbable) scenario of spontaneous organic combustion come up and he thinks you need a hot day to have it happen. 

 

it turns out Adam shares a mutual friend with me.... might have to call my friend to tell him Adam might be an idiot.

 

Edited May 1, 2018 by AUS-97HORN

[huge 3793]

<narrator> he is <narrator>

[DigglerontheHoof 21200]

Holy shit, 97horn, that is some impressive stupidity on display....I can't imagine how hard the firemen were laughing as they left. 

[Player 4575]

97 - you need to casually mention that they might want to bring in a firefighter/disaster scientist to get to the bottom of this. 

[gyroprotagonist 2592]

needs a pic of stump before and NEVER FORGET tag.

biggest craze in ours is a fucked up looking dude stealing peoples outdoor cameras/Ring setups.  lots of great photos of the guy, but he obviously DGAF.

[Chuychanga 133]

97 is up in my old ‘hood. Wooten Warrior for life!

[You don't know me 1161]

I hope the fire department sends them a bill.

[KaiserSoze 998]

Edited May 2, 2018 by KaiserSoze

[GSU&UT 1798]

Took me all of a few seconds of browsing just now to see another coyote attack thread on my Nextdoor. Brian's last post is a fucking doozy, I'm ready to troll him at this point.

 

Brian , Embry Hills

 

Coyotes

Coyotes are not uncommon in our neighborhood. I have advocated trapping and removing them. Here is one reason: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/05/01/coyote-attacking-children-on-new-york-playground-throttled-by-off-duty-officer.html

New1d ago · 45 neighborhoods in Crime & Safety

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Reply

 

1 Thank · 1 Reply

 

Courtney

, Woods of Henderson·Edited 1d agoNew

We have a friend who is a park ranger and wildlife expert, and he states that trapping and removal flat out doesn’t work. Because coyotes are so territorial, if one pack is… See more

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4 Thanks

 

Robert

, Kingscliff/Northlake·1d agoNew

I predicted that coyotes would start attacking children. There are coyotes all over these neighborhoods the including Lindmoor Woods

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John

, Candy Heights·1d agoNew

To whom is the trapping assigned? Are you volunteering?

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Brian

, Embry Hills·1d agoNew

Compared to my farmer friends your rancher friend has a defeatist perspective. Farmers often lease their land out to hunters. If we dont cull them down through trapping we will eventually be prisoners in our homes.

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Brian

, Embry Hills·1d agoNew

You have to hire a trapper with a permit I would imagine.

 Thank

 

Lee

, Oakcliff·Edited 11h agoNew

I am from California originally. Coyotes are everywhere out west, and no one is a prisoner in their home. Attacks of humans by coyotes are exceptionally rare - like much rarer than being struck by lightning and you are far more likely to be attacked by a domestic dog. Based on the actual evidence from places who’ve been dealing with a lot of coyotes for a long time, trapping and removal programs have been very ineffective, as have attempts to reduce or eradicate urban coyote populations. Most of the problems humans have with coyotes are because the community hasn’t been properly educated on how to deal with them. People try to feed them, leave garbage out and fail to “haze” them (face them down and make loud noises to scare them away) when they see one. Coyotes are naturally afraid of humans and will simply avoid us if they can, unless they become habituated to seeing humans because the humans are feeding them and not doing our part to let them know this is our territory. Here’s a really good summation from Colorado Wildlife Services. They know a few things about dealing with coyotes in Colorado. https://cpw.state.co.us/Documents/WildlifeSpecies/LivingWithWildlife/FAQs-Urban-Coyotes.pdf

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John

, Candy Heights·1d agoNew

In my limited experience they disappear fast around people.

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Brian

, Embry Hills·1d agoNew

When it comes to vermin that invade my territory and endanger those things I love (such as my pets) I believe in the laws the coyotes follow: When a rival predator invades your territory you drive them off or kill them. In an urban environment I don’t think we should have to babysit our pets constantly. I think it a reasonable expectation that we can leave our dogs outdoors in our fenced backyard and not be concerned for their safety. If you found a copperhead in your backyard - would you just “live with it” or would you kill the threat to your pets? Sorry if this offends you.

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Brian

, Embry Hills·1d agoNew

John- before or after they have killed your pets and eaten them?

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Lee

, Oakcliff·1d agoNew

I’m not offended - just saying that actual evidence shows this is an ineffective approach. Small pets are always in some danger being outdoors unsupervised in an urban environment. Cats and small dogs aren’t just vulnerable to coyotes, they’re also vulnerable to stray dogs, birds of prey, raccoons, and unscrupulous humans. They also often dig under fences and end up being hit by cars. So, I keep my cats indoors, and my dog weighs 50 pounds and can scare off a coyote. Some folks go ahead and take the risk of leaving their pets outdoors, and that’s up to them, but it is and has always been a risk, regardless whether coyotes are around or not.

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9 Thanks

 

Bill

, Northcrest·9h agoNew

That is the first time in my life I have heard of a coyote attack on people. They are good at killing rats and mice. How often to you hear of dog attacks on children and we don't do away with dogs. How many children are killed in car crashes each year.

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Carla

, Kingscliff/Northlake·7h agoNew

That's BS coyotes wouldn't run around attacking children...lol

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Daniela 

, Northwoods·7h agoNew

Keep the coyotes in the woods. This is their home. Nobody is trying to kick us out of our houses because we do so many disgusting things that hurt the environment, hurt animals, and a bunch of other nonsense people do.

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Brian 

, Embry Hills·6h agoNew

Bill : Listen its no skin off my teeth. I have three medium size dogs so as long as they dont get in a three to one situation they are ok. My neighbor on the other hand once had five cats who mostly stayed outside at night. She is down to one now most likely due to coyotes. How I know? In the thirty years we have been in the neighborhood I have gotten up at night to use the loo and on at least five occasions looked out the window to see a coyote stalking their cats in their carport with the cats on top of the car. Again my pets can handle themselves but as far as the rest of you, you are on your own. Fair warning has been offered. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coyote_attacks_on_humans

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1 Thank

 

Lynn 

, Around Sharon Park·6h agoNew

They don't stay in the woods any more.

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Brian 

, Embry Hills·5h agoNew

Daniela: I dont mean to sound snooty but if humans are just another predator species then all we are doing by developing our surroundings is fulfilling our Darwinian destiny.. Other species modify their environments and kill for food without a thought as to how their actions affect other species. You also have to remember that species extinction as a result of natural selection is a feature of evolution. No one however wonders if our often over the top efforts to save a species is in fact interfering with the course of evolution. Just saying.

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Daniela T

, Northwoods·5h agoNew

I've had a an inside/outside cat for 15 years. She's always lived in an area full of coyotes and foxes. I don't leave her outside at night because I love her. She's still well and alive and has never been attacked. If you leave your pets outside at night, then they're not really your pets - they're just animals at that point. As far as people, the minute coyotes start attacking people in droves, I'll be all for taking measures. It doesn't seem to be a huge issue right now. Let's not blow one obscure incident in NY out of proportion. As far as the news source, I would look for other sources in addition to Fox News - don't trust them even one bit but that's out of scope.

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3 Thanks

Brian

, Embry Hills·5h agoNew

There is a reason why in nearly every state its legal to hunt coyotes year round with no limit : http://rapidcityjournal.com/news/state-trapper-has-killed-hundreds-of-coyotes-to-protect-livestock/article_f8de4bd6-c676-5638-ac69-595203439acd.html

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1 Thank

 

Lee

, Oakcliff·Edited 3h agoNew

Brian, it IS legal to hunt coyotes in Georgia year round with no limit. However most urban areas don’t allow hunting of any kind, for good reason. People trying to shoot or trap coyotes in a city pose a greater danger to their neighbors and pets than the coyotes themselves do. Also, nobody here has argued that we shouldn’t hunt or relocate coyotes because we want to “save the species.” Coyotes are not an endangered species, and if an animal is posing a direct threat to me or my pets, I don’t have any moral issue with trapping or killing it. The reasons I’ve stated for being against it are 1) it’s ineffective, and 2) in urban areas, as I just said, trying to trap or hunt coyotes is more of a danger to humans and our pets than the coyotes themselves are. As I and others have already said, this is taking a very isolated incident and overreacting to it, in a way that would cause more problems than it would solve.

4 Thanks

 

Brian

, Embry Hills·4h agoNew

Clearly you didnt read my subsequent citations showing the number of fatal coyote attacks and the annual damage they do to livestock. Again I really dont care what you do with the information that I offered about predator activity in our neighborhood. What you do with it, whether you modify your actions or not, and the consequences of your decisions are of no concern to me. I am glad your cat has avoided the coyotes.

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Jane 

, Ashford Embry Hills·Edited 4h agoNew

Lee  - you are so well informed on this subject matter, are patient, and your diplomacy is commendable. Thank you for the helpful input - sincerely!

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4 Thanks

 

Brian

, Embry Hills·1h agoNew

Lee: Thank you for your reply. Let me offer you a perspective from a 23 year career as an airline instructor pilot and a professional firearms trainer. In both endeavors when we are talking about any threat we use a risk matrix. Frequent risks with low level consequences are deemed low overall risk and the consequences - if those threats are not “trapped” (to use aviator language) - are acceptable. However infrequent threats with low risk levels but high consequence levels are trained for regularly. Eg. Engine failures right at rotation off the runway happen about once in 2.5 million departures. Yet we train for them EVERY year as the consequences of mis-managing that event are all out of proportion to the frequency of the threat. Whether my suggestion is over the top depends on how you rate the consequence of a dead pet or worse young child relative to the possibility of the event occurring. In our self defense classes we ask our students to imagine the unthinkable and to experience the after the fact feelings resulting from not being prepared to manage the threat no matter how unlikely. Imagining what that would feel like drives how we in my careers look at potential threats to our safety. In my career we make these risk assessments and reward trade offs many times a day in the airliner. I have lost seven friends to aviation. I watched two of them burn to death in a crash at the Marietta airport. It changes you - particularly if you have been on the wrong end of a gun unarmed as I have been twice - once in the Big Lots parking lot near my house here in Embry Hills. We live in a nice neighborhood, we dont go THOSE place, we don’t associate with THOSE kinds of people, we don’t do THOSE things. I am a consummate professional pilot - I will never die in a crash. Coyotes attacks are infrequent. Armed robbery in nice neighborhoods is virtually non-existent. It wont happen to me - right? I have personal experience with the consequences of that attitude. Sometimes when I think back about watching Dan and his lovely 14 year old daughter Julie that day 18 years ago tears still come to my eyes. I would be more that happy to offload those memories to someone else to bear. Just wanted you to know that my perspective on possible threats - which is very different from the average citizen’s - has been shaped by my career and my personal experiences. It changes you. When I see a potential threat, my reflexive reaction is to analyze it, figure out how to manage it, or eliminate it, because that is what I have been trained and continue to train to do. Its what I do on the flight deck every day. Now you know where I am coming from with regards to my post. No insult intended in anything I have said however my perspective will not change and I want you to understand that the intent of my original post was to perhaps prevent a neighbor from experiencing a little of what I have experienced.

 Thank

 

[AUS-97HORN 11765]

lol. Brian is a fucking badass

[dufus 9]

On 4/27/2018 at 2:29 PM, Cheeseweasel said:

I can see it now:

 

Y'all! THERE'S A HUGE SNAPPING TURTLE IN MY YARD!!! DEADLY!!! 

Y'all!  There is a huge snapping turtle in my yard - soup for the entire block!

[GSU&UT 1798]

8 minutes ago, AUS-97HORN said:

lol. Brian is a fucking badass

When I deal with vermin I CONSULT MY RISK MATRIX!!!!!!

[Doc Sam Beckett 5793]

1 hour ago, GSU&UT said:

When I deal with vermin I CONSULT MY RISK MATRIX!!!!!!

Brian gives the coyotes an ocular pat down. 

[huge 3793]

This Brian guys sounds like the ideal neighbor

[honolulu horn 6158]

Found a picture of Brian:

Edited May 3, 2018 by honolulu horn

[Player 4575]

Brian’s existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you saves lives. You don’t want the truth. Because deep down in places you don’t talk about at parties, you want him on that wall. You need him on that wall. He uses words like coyote risk matrix...he usss these words as the backbone to a life spent defending something. You use ‘em as a punchline. 

[GSU&UT 1798]

Now Jessica has decided to chime in. She frequently posts videos of "thugs" and other dog-whistle title posts of various people in the neighborhood.

 

Jessica

, Northwoods·40m ago

I posted a video on here of 2 huge coyotes on Chestnut Dr. There is no doubt about it that these wild animals are a public safety concern. I don't care how many coyote huggers on here start a big argument with what I'm about to say. They are not native here and are an invasive species to ga. A pack of 2-3 can take out A deer or two before you can blink. I have video of them running down the street on two different occasions with a neighbors cat and a small dog in their mouths. That's why it is the law in our state to put this invasive and aggressive animal down whenever caught. People who tell you otherwise honestly just have no clue what they are dealing with here. It is a big problem in our neighborhood and it's just a matter of time before someone else's pet disappears or we have another attack like the one in Roswell 7 months ago. Ever wonder why there are so many missing pet posts here on Nextdoor? Here is the link of the two coyotes at my house (NOT the video of them killing neighborhood pets) https://youtu.be/q31q8pPeSD8

[High Plains Drifter 11050]

 Here is the video at Jessica's link. Looks like its time to move.

 

 

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

Jessica's video looks like it was filmed by the guys who did Blair Witch.

[UT Lawnghorn 758]

20 hours ago, KaiserSoze said:

It's a good thing I'm not on NextDoor, otherwise I'd go smear tampons on her windows with ketchup. 

[jimmyjazz 45960]

I hope they dusted the tree stump for fingerprints.

[Buck Strickland 380]

Brian did not watch his buddies die face down in the muck so these fucking coyotes can go terrorizing the neighborhood.

[ABSR 5315]

2 hours ago, Buck Strickland said:

Brian did not watch his buddies die face down in the muck so these fucking coyotes can go terrorizing the neighborhood.

You're damn right Donny!

[The University 851]

On 4/19/2018 at 11:05 PM, kmac30 said:

When I moved from Austin I used her as our realtor and I can see her sleeping around. This was in 2015. She showed up at our house to meet us dressed like she was going out on a Saturday to meet a hookup. But hey, she got my house sold in 2 days for a lot more than I expected and took less than 3% to get the deal done.

just the tip, eh?

[retsevlys 408]

Coyote talk not going away

 

Edited May 4, 2018 by retsevlys

[Trey3216 15346]

On 4/30/2018 at 7:53 PM, Baboontyme said:

Someone just posted this.

 

Anna Lynn, Ferrini

RNM

How can a lawsuit keep keep delaying/continuing SO! say an expensive “eye camera device” is put into your eye and all info in the lawsuit that is to be sent to you via eyecambraindevice is always being moved and damaged by the human body surrounding it to top it off why should your lawsuit continue if the defendant Burned your eyes 2.5 years into an investigation showroom. This outrages me I don’t think lawsuits should continue they’ll lose please tell me if you agree that it should end the day the victims eyes are burned.

Edited 13m ago · 22 neighborhoods in General

WTF am I attempting to read.  My eye camera device can't decipher such nonense

[Trey3216 15346]

On 5/3/2018 at 10:19 AM, jimmyjazz said:

I hope they dusted the tree stump for fingerprints.

Did they check with the fellas down at the crime lab?  Heard they were working in shifts. 

[jw4381 3076]

On 4/20/2018 at 9:41 AM, Saint Tacky said:

My son started selling bags of mulch and compost on Nextdoor as part of his Boy Scout Troop's effort to help Scout's raise money for themselves to pay for Philmont, etc.  His first year he sold 800+ bags and this year he sold over 2,000.  Took us an entire weekend to deliver it all and he'll keep about $1.50 a bag.  It is the only thing I have found Nextdoor to be useful for.

So your son sells bags of weed? Cool.

[Baboontyme 2812]

55 minutes ago, Trey3216 said:

WTF am I attempting to read.  My eye camera device can't decipher such nonense

Her gibberish got deleted the next day. There were a couple of other snarky responses but mine was the best IMO. 

[Trey3216 15346]

3 minutes ago, Baboontyme said:

Her gibberish got deleted the next day. There were a couple of other snarky responses but mine was the best IMO. 

I mean, Lord have mercy.   

[retsevlys 408]

1 hour ago, retsevlys said:

Coyote talk not going away

 

[Jerry Callo 8703]

Is Bob Cats the creepy guy that lives around the corner?

[lateshow 1304]

10 minutes ago, Jerry Callo said:

Is Bob Cats the creepy guy that lives around the corner?

[You don't know me 1161]

Someone needs to get on there as Carl Coyote and complain about all the terrifying people that have moved into the neighborhood.