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Blippi is a sign that God hates parents and wants us to suffer

Rimbo

By Rimbo
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Pig Bellmont

Pig Bellmont 8745

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13 hours ago, ChickenSandwich said:

Settle a dispute for me. Archer is cool for an 8 year old right?  Sister totally overreacting 

No, dude. 8 year olds shouldn’t know “sploosh” or really all the jokes. Don’t they discuss tentacle porn at one point? Season 4 or 5 is all about running cocaine

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UT_OB1

UT_OB1 2227

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4 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

PBS apps are actually pretty good.  Cat in the House.  Ready Jet Go is a good one as well - bunch of STEM stuff in the app and on the show.

Just spent about 20 minutes on the play and learn with the 5 year old building the machines to move sandwiches while the 3rd grader did her online social studies and math work. This is great. Thank you again. 

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Rimbo

Rimbo 26174

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4 hours ago, Lobo said:

Damn straight.  We still watch Sesame street every now and again.  My youngest (15 months) will be old enough to start engaging and enjoying it in another few months, I'm excited for that.  

The movie parodies they do on HBO are great.  I forget their clever title, but it was based on "Boardwalk Empire."   My wife and I cracked up and watched it a half dozen times while our oldest just stared at us in confusion.  

Their Twilight: Breaking Cookie is absolute brilliance.

There was some AskReddit question... "Choose a movie and an actor; the rest are Muppets." Someone suggested Twilight... after watching everyone's suggestions, I pointed out that not only had it already been done, but it was better than any of their suggestions.

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Viper

Viper 12112

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On 3/28/2020 at 5:03 PM, Js1 said:

Peppa is fucking savage 

 

 

On 3/28/2020 at 6:13 PM, atomheartbevo said:

My favorite episode

 

What about the one with all the dad's getting drunk and setting the BBQ on fire?

 

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Rimbo

Rimbo 26174

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OK, now she wants to watch Shimmer and Shine.

It's... actually really charming.

Also, the "bad guy" in the stories is... really not terrible or bad in any way. We saw an episode where the little brat and her two genies turn themselves into babies, and what does Big Bad Zeta do? She makes them a bed and tucks them in. 

also Zeta might be my type

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Pig Bellmont

Pig Bellmont 8745

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4 hours ago, Rimbo said:

OK, now she wants to watch Shimmer and Shine.

It's... actually really charming.

Also, the "bad guy" in the stories is... really not terrible or bad in any way. We saw an episode where the little brat and her two genies turn themselves into babies, and what does Big Bad Zeta do? She makes them a bed and tucks them in. 

also Zeta might be my type

Basically anything on Nick Jr is what my daughter watches. It’s not terrible and I prefer it over most of the kids shows on Netflix 

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'stache

'stache 21895

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Haha, my 2 year old son is obsessed with Blippi. He doesn't bother me as much as he used to, and some of the songs are kind of catchy. He at least tries to pretend there is "educational" content, and my son does follow along sometimes with letters and numbers. I'm ready for him to move on though, hopefully to something on PBS Kids. 

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Mole

Mole 4333

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His songs are extremely ear-wormy and the bridge to the excavator song sounds like “Every Breath You Take.” Its pretend educational. It’s not the worst kid stuff out there, but it’s in the bottom half. It sure has some magic kid dust to keep their attention though.

I’m a fan of story bots on Netflix. The guest stars are awesome and it’s actually educational. Snoop is the guest on How Do Computers Work. 

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Rimbo

Rimbo 26174

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On 7/5/2020 at 1:15 PM, Rimbo said:

OK, now she wants to watch Shimmer and Shine.

It's... actually really charming.

Also, the "bad guy" in the stories is... really not terrible or bad in any way. We saw an episode where the little brat and her two genies turn themselves into babies, and what does Big Bad Zeta do? She makes them a bed and tucks them in. 

also Zeta might be my type

I just found out who voices Zeta.

MV5BMTU1Nzc3NzAwMl5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNzY1

Yes. She is definitely my type.

(Lacey Chabert, if you didn't know.)

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'stache

'stache 21895

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On 7/7/2020 at 7:40 PM, Mole said:

His songs are extremely ear-wormy and the bridge to the excavator song sounds like “Every Breath You Take.” Its pretend educational. It’s not the worst kid stuff out there, but it’s in the bottom half. It sure has some magic kid dust to keep their attention though.

I’m a fan of story bots on Netflix. The guest stars are awesome and it’s actually educational. Snoop is the guest on How Do Computers Work. 

"Hey Dirt!  See ya later...." Yeah, every minute of every day in my head. My 8 year old daughter really likes Story Bots, hope they have some new stuff soon. She also loved Brainchild. She got into PBS kids at about the age of my son so we're hoping he makes the switch soon.

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Gourmand

Gourmand 7774

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This thread hits me right square in the nuts. My two year old is crazy about Blippi to the point where I know all the songs and get earworms from him watching it.

I hate Blippi so very much but props to him for making a fortune doing stupid kid videos on YouTube.

Sent from my Pixel 3a using Tapatalk

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Mkost

Mkost 2

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On 3/28/2020 at 5:26 PM, Rimbo said:

This is the dumbest motherfucking godawful children's tv show I've ever had the misfortune of having to suffer through. And I've lived through both Barney and the Teletubbies with my elder child.

I mean, at least Barney had songs, and some semblance of dignity preserved by hiding inside a purple dinosaur costume.

And Teletubbies had songs, too, and children thankfully outgrew it within moments.

This is just episode after episode of this orange and purple wearing asshole dancing like a fucking dipshit in playgrounds intended for kids a fraction of his age, as if he belongs there.

Seriously, folks. Where the fuck is Chris Hansens now that we fucking need him the most? Is he "social distancing" his ass away from Blippi?

Praise God that there aren't liquor shortages in the stores. But there isn't enough liquor in the entire British Isles to make this dumbfuck shittery tolerable.

Fuck. FUUUUUCK. IT'S FREE ON AMAZON PRIME VIDEO. I should cancel my Prime account, just so my daughter can't ask to watch this fucking asshole any more. I can tell her, "Sorry, we had to cut back, can't see him any more. How about Peppa Pig?"

I fucking love Peppa Pig. At least Peppa Pig has some fantastic jokes in it just for the parents. Like the episode with the Wolf kid's birthday party, where the Wolves keep making subtle suggestions towards the sheep kid and her parents. Or the Halloween episode, where one of the kids dresses up as a vampire, the teacher says "That reminds me of the old country," and the Narrator helpfully points out that she isn't casting a reflection in the mirror. See, that's not much, but it's something.

Like we are now on our second episode of this fuckshitdickless dumbfuck playing around with toy trucks and making squeaky noises.

I can feel it, Dave. My mind is going.

OK, I've typed enough, time to see how much whiskey I have left. God.... 

Reading this made me feel slightly better.  I’ve been losing my god damn mind over this fucking guy for MONTHS.  My kids LOVE him and my love for my kids translates to tolerance I didn’t think I had and while I don’t know where it comes from I can tell you that all this magical tolerance does is inspire thoughts like .. oh I don’t know.. buying a plane ticket and a cab ride, knocking on his stupid door and strangling him with his own fucking suspenders.  At THAT point and ONLY that point would it be acceptable for him to make that fucking dipshit dumb fucking squeaky noise and would mark the first and ONLY time I will ever be happy to hear it.  Months of hearing this fucking queef squeal like the tip of a dick has just breached the rim of his asshole has without a fraction of a damn doubt eroded my mind irreparably.  All that squeal does is incite a dog like instinct to chase and kill.
 

Sometimes I can power through a few episodes by daydreaming about suddenly seeing my third person self blasting into the camera frame like a fucking superhero (truly) and just ... laying absolute fucking WASTE to his shitty, squeaky, douchebag, garbage body.  Happy thoughts.

 

I would kill for my kids to love peppa pig this much.  Peppa Pig is a great show.  Blippi .... grumble mumble god dammit son of a bitch GRRRRRRRRRR!!  How is this fucking cunt a millionaire? 
 

Ok, I’m done ranting.  Maybe I’ll take a tip and get my ass to the liquor store.  Lol

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Rimbo

Rimbo 26174

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4 hours ago, Mkost said:

Reading this made me feel slightly better.  I’ve been losing my god damn mind over this fucking guy for MONTHS.  My kids LOVE him and my love for my kids translates to tolerance I didn’t think I had and while I don’t know where it comes from I can tell you that all this magical tolerance does is inspire thoughts like .. oh I don’t know.. buying a plane ticket and a cab ride, knocking on his stupid door and strangling him with his own fucking suspenders.

Can you imagine the sounds he would make while you were doing it? See, I'd skip the strangling and go for a long-distance sniper rifle. With earmuffs. So I wouldn't have to hear that.

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BigOrange1

BigOrange1 6476

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my nephews (2 and 3) fucking love blippi.  i just can't believe we live in a world where a guy can make millions of dollars/year doing...that.

my 3 year old nephew was in town over the weekend and there is a new youtube show he couldn't stop watching that was a fucking hamster going through obstacle courses.  the shit kids watch...

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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89895

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1 hour ago, BigOrange1 said:

my nephews (2 and 3) fucking love blippi.  i just can't believe we live in a world where a guy can make millions of dollars/year doing...that..

A guy who, not too long ago, was literally had himself filmed while shitting on his friend's chest while doing the Harlem Shake or whatever.

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Nivek

Nivek 17016

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Can you imagine the sounds he would make while you were doing it? See, I'd skip the strangling and go for a long-distance sniper rifle. With earmuffs. So I wouldn't have to hear that.

You would skip the strangle cause Blippi would likely kick your ass. My kid loved Blippi when he was 3 and his Garbage Truck toy is pretty well made.
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Mkost

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10 hours ago, Nivek said:


You would skip the strangle cause Blippi would likely kick your ass. My kid loved Blippi when he was 3 and his Garbage Truck toy is pretty well made.

Yeah I’m sure he’d do that side kick bitch run thing with his arms flopping all over the place while squealing like a child the entire time until 5 feet away, where what, he switches channels and goes full Bruce Lee?  
 

I’m completely confident the actual Bruce Lee would appear out of thin air in this scenario and instantly end him on the spot for attempting to “bitchify” Jeet Kune Do. 

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Nivek

Nivek 17016

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16 hours ago, Mkost said:

Yeah I’m sure he’d do that side kick bitch run thing with his arms flopping all over the place while squealing like a child the entire time until 5 feet away, where what, he switches channels and goes full Bruce Lee?  
 

I’m completely confident the actual Bruce Lee would appear out of thin air in this scenario and instantly end him on the spot for attempting to “bitchify” Jeet Kune Do. 

Blippi makes Wayne Brady look like Malcom X.

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Rimbo

Rimbo 26174

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On 2/7/2021 at 5:47 PM, Okie State said:

My kids are obsessed with Bluey. It's actually pretty good so can't really complain about it.

I started her on it tonight, but she was only meh with it. At least she asked for something good after that. Or at least not Blippi.

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Wanker Bob

Wanker Bob 379

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Our niece that lives with us is now a teenager so no more kids shows, but about 8 years ago this girl I was living with had a 7-8 yr old brother we'd watch on Saturday mornings for her parents. At the time he loved watching Regular Show and I'll be damned if that isn't probably the best kids cartoon I've seen. All the nostalgic call backs and parodies were great. I lost it when they did Weekend at Bernie's with the pepper eating contest. 

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NotActuallyALonghorn

NotActuallyALonghorn 4979

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I still don't get the hate, other than it is mildly annoying to hear/see a grown man act like that, but he does educational type videos and likes to sing songs about construction equipment and stuff. Do y'all have a secret hate for excavators? Would you rather your kid watch Ryan or some other kid unboxing a bunch of toys that your kid doesn't need?

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MNLonghornFUKM

MNLonghornFUKM 8835

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I still don't get the hate, other than it is mildly annoying to hear/see a grown man act like that, but he does educational type videos and likes to sing songs about construction equipment and stuff. Do y'all have a secret hate for excavators? Would you rather your kid watch Ryan or some other kid unboxing a bunch of toys that your kid doesn't need?

Neither. My favorite is ninja kids. They just uploaded a video of a house(mansion) tour that we paid for with views. Impeccable backyard view of the Utah mountains and a bad ass pool.

Not only do they have the family channel but every individual kid has their own channel with x00k subscribers themselves.


DoNt FoRgEt To HiT lIkE aNd SuBsCrIbE bElOw

Fuck off
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Doc Holliday

Doc Holliday 199

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Best friend's son LOVES this show.  The kiddo is less than 2 years old and I went to hangout for a weekend and could only stand 18 hours straight of Blippi in the living room, some other show in their kitchen, and all the screaming to be heard over the TVs. 

It was that weekend when I realized how lucky I am to not have to be tortured everyday by Blippi, Peppa, or any of the other shows out there.

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Homercles

Homercles 10206

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Thankfully Blippi was short lived around here.  Now my 7yo loves some English or Aussie kid who uses his toys to tell stories in some awful hackney accent that makes my ears smoke...my 4yo is all over the map though.  
 

I am sad that they both outgrew Peppa quickly.  Hell my ringtone on my phone is the Peppa theme song, my avatar on Slack is Daddy pig with a briefcase and Pedro Pony is my jam.  I wish my kids were still into it, I’d gladly watch it with them as English humor is always spot on and as noted they leave nuggets for the adults.  
 

The UN, whistling, baby Alexander, turtle in a tree and glitter episodes are hilarious.  Believe Ms Rabbit got an award from the queen IRL due to the many jobs she has in town.  
 

I had the feels here starting the 2:00 mark

 

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Gene Parmesan

Gene Parmesan 4016

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My older kids grew up with the sprout channel, and I miss fantasizing about Nina during the goodnight show.  Of the shit on that channel Caillou was the absolute worst and obviously the one mine liked the best.  Our youngest grew up in the cord cut era and loved Blippi and Ryan both.  Blippi never bothered me, but Ryan was ridiculous and even more so if you look up what he's worth.  YouTube kids is like crack though.  My youngest will end up on stuff that's not even in English but glued to the screen.  Even the kids version of youtube has some weird shit on it, it's best to not even start that path.  I would rather catch my kids watching porn then some of the stuff they get into on youtube.

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BradInATX

BradInATX 9208

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1 hour ago, Doc Holliday said:

Best friend's son LOVES this show.  The kiddo is less than 2 years old and I went to hangout for a weekend and could only stand 18 hours straight of Blippi in the living room, some other show in their kitchen, and all the screaming to be heard over the TVs. 

It was that weekend when I realized how lucky I am to not have to be tortured everyday by Blippi, Peppa, or any of the other shows out there.

 

Peppa and Blippy shouldn't ever be in the same sentence. Peppa is semi-educational and is pretty quiet and low key. Blippy is loud trash TV, the child equivalent of the Kardashian reality show. Also Peppa doesn't shit all over her friends for social media likes. 

Only issue with Peppa is my kid calling Christmas ornaments "baubles" all holiday season. 

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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89895

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1 hour ago, BradInATX said:

Peppa is semi-educational and is pretty quiet and low key.

I am perfectly fine with Peppa, or Ben and Holly (a cool fantasy series from the people behind Peppa Pig).  Peppa is honest.  

Q: Why do you want to be a queen/teacher/firefighter/police officer/etc.?

A: So we can tell people what to do!

 

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