Fitlump fucking won a Austin City Council seat, Now on to Congress 2026!

[RamjetFDO 10577]

1 hour ago, Jive Turkey said:

i'm stunned.  i'm pissed.  it's Fitlump.

 

1 hour ago, smuggs said:

Would make a fantastic T-shirt.

 

 

/nobert

Edited December 16, 2020 by RamjetFDO

[Armybrat 40914]

28 minutes ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

So when she posted her tits and said it wasn't like she was running for office, which one of you degenerates planted the seed and said she should totally run for office? Because I think we can blame him.

I imagine more than one Shagger planted seeds in her.

[drt 640]

[Shaggy3.0 1695]

59 minutes ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

What’s the recall process? I could see an attempt to get her recalled down the road. After she shows up hammered and wearing a random cast or bandage a few dozen times.

 

I hope someone doesn't attempt to short-circuit the shaggy/surly master plan for world domination.   Hell, we tolerated Lump and her friends from the Island of Misfits.  We groomed her.  Do not limit our opportunities for LULZZZZ.  This is our time.  Shaggy/Surly has a better track record of producing knuckle-dragging rock throwers and city council seat members than picking football coaches.  Think about that.

  

[Ghost of LL 15540]

6 hours ago, DaysOff said:

Austin has always seemed the most poorly managed of all the large Texas cities. Now I know why.

I guess it depends on your definition of "large."  But there's no doubt that Corpus Christi is worse run than Austin.  I'd probably make the argument that Dallas and Fort Worth are both worse run.

6 hours ago, BradInATX said:

6 hours ago, DaysOff said:

Austin has always seemed the most poorly managed of all the large Texas cities. Now I know why.

Good observation. Austin is hurting real bad. It's basically Detroit now.

And maybe that raises the question about how much good city government matters in the scheme of things.  Because I think most people who are in the know in such things would agree that San Antonio is the best-run city in Texas.  But I don't think anybody would trade Austin's growth or economy for San Antonio's.

[Foggy Notion 1202]

5 hours ago, phdhorn said:

Does anyone have a full-size gif of her doing her "football fast step" workout?  We need to post that prominently.

The only thing that's left to make this a perfect world is to find out down the line that Greg Casar is fucking around with her.  Please Number One, make it happen!

Not sure if this is full size, but here’s one that found and posted a while back in the thread.

[phdhorn 6224]

Yes! Thank you!!!

This needs to be posted a lot everywhere in the next 6 months.

[Shaggy3.0 1695]

5 minutes ago, Foggy Notion said:

Not sure if this is full size, but here’s one that found and posted a while back in the thread.

Looks like a brute-force algo touching every element in the array.

Time & Space complexity = O(n^goofy!)

Edited December 16, 2020 by Shaggy3.0
im covid day drinking

[Hank Scorpio 17731]

I’m hearing that Txtow is going to be her chief of staff. 

[davidg 4038]

1 hour ago, RamjetFDO said:

 

 

 

/nobert

Please redo with appropriate sized skull lump.

[crash_davis 23115]

I'm still laughing at the absolute batshittiness of this. But again, she would've never had a chance to get elected if the City Council wasn't already fucked up whereby making someone like her a viable option. Holy shit, we were fucked before with the existing CC. Now we are proper fucked.

[atomheartbevo 89805]

wrong thread

Edited December 16, 2020 by atomheartbevo

[CooterBrown 18031]

2 hours ago, dingleberryswitzer said:

So will this be the highest paying and most stable job she's ever had?

Hope she doesn't spend it all on paint and fake Harvard certificates.

I would guess this doubles the salary of the highest paying job she's ever held.  May even be able to move out of the in-law's garage and into a studio apartment up at Anderson Mill.

 

[phdhorn 6224]

Remember how 30 years ago you saw this movie and thought, "it's a really good, funny way out there fantasy. But it could never really happen."

Uh, yeah. Sure. Never.

[NorthLoop 14248]

We could do something fun with this no? 

[RamjetFDO 10577]

35 minutes ago, NorthLoop said:

We could do something fun with this no? 

 

[Gourmand 7774]

Anyone have an idea of Fitlump's whereabouts yesterday afternoon?

https://www.kxan.com/news/crime/fire-investigators-search-for-2-women-who-bought-gasoline-set-fire-to-homeless-encampment-in-northwest-austin/

 

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

Surprised to see Bert that easily.

[Anastasis 23484]

No Lance Armstrong cut out?

[Biff Tannen 45742]

Holy fuck what did I miss?  This really happened?  

[RamjetFDO 10577]

1 hour ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Surprised to see Bert that easily.

#MerryChristmas

[atomheartbevo 89805]

11 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

Holy fuck what did I miss?  This really happened?  

So is this you?

[BearSchlong 8114]

@RamjetFDOthanks for the new microsoft teams background.  Guys at work are gonna wtf?

Edited December 16, 2020 by BearSchlong

[atomheartbevo 89805]

The reddit thread is interesting, lot of good info - low turnout, she won Travis, but lost Williamson, etc.

 

[ulukinatme 1765]

5 hours ago, Pasken said:

She's not going to give up a guaranteed salary.  I think it's more likely she's indicted by the end of her term.

Giving up salaries and being indicted at the end of their term?  Is this Fit-Trump?

[washparkhorn 9939]

Have Austin's bond ratings suffered yet? 

[phdhorn 6224]

10 minutes ago, washparkhorn said:

Have Austin's bond ratings suffered yet? 

Not yet, but the bondage ratings are way up.

[ulukinatme 1765]

7 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

I just spammed all her support tweets with the archive link

 

https://archive.is/ivW52

Jeebus...I remember some of this on the old site, but her crazy knows no bounds.  

[Brisketexan 105352]

9 minutes ago, phdhorn said:

Not yet, but the bondage ratings are way up.

[NAVY 6747]

Fucking fitLump is being discussed on the local news. JFC 

[Pasken 1309]

3 minutes ago, NAVY said:

Fucking fitLump is being discussed on the local news. JFC 

Should have happened before the election. 

[demos 3011]

Fuck it, just gonna lay back and enjoy.

[atomheartbevo 89805]

35 minutes ago, NAVY said:

Fucking fitLump is being discussed on the local news. JFC 

[Brisketexan 105352]

14 minutes ago, atomheartbevo said:

You know all of those horrible Hollywood vanity comedies a few years back, where literally every disaster occurred in sequence, and the heroes had to deal with all of them?  Earthquakes, fires, tornadoes, sharknadoes, demons rising.....all of it?

We're living in that shittacular script, in the real world.  It's fucking amazing.  It's become so outlandish that I'm actually almost coming all the way back around from kicking back and enjoying watching it all unfold, just to see what fucking happens next.

[SHOOTER12 8829]

2 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

The reddit thread is interesting, lot of good info - low turnout, she won Travis, but lost Williamson, etc.

 

Lord just when I thought she couldn't take a worse picture.

[DCA_HORN 725]

Well if Rob Lowe can save austin from an active volcano this isn't so far fetched.

[SHOOTER12 8829]

6 hours ago, Anastasis said:

El Terrón Grande coming through. 

Fify

[FORTY NINE TO ZERO 2652]

Bahahahahahaah 

[TexasEd 8077]

8 hours ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

So when she posted her tits and said it wasn't like she was running for office, which one of you degenerates planted the seed and said she should totally run for office? Because I think we can blame him.

Can I plead the fifth?  I need to pour another glass of Bourbon.

 

Edited December 17, 2020 by TexasEd

[Wally Fairway 5587]

6 hours ago, RamjetFDO said:

 

 

 

/nobert

How about a tee shirt that says Mackenzie Kelly (aka CamGirl Faith, FitLive/Fitlump) showed me her tits

 

[Homercles 10206]

Not sure I’d brag about that.  These look more natural than hers. 

Edited December 17, 2020 by Homercles

[markstanco 12612]

It wasn't a CR post you stupid cunt. FitLump has shown on this very board that she's unstable and stupid. Do you disagree?

Wow, why so angry with the name calling? We both know the reference.

[BradInATX 9208]

Wow, why so angry with the name calling? We both know the reference.

No idea what you're talking about. Now kindly fuck off.

[markstanco 12612]

No idea what you're talking about. Now kindly fuck off.

Proof you do.

[Underdog 28773]

6 hours ago, NorthLoop said:

We could do something fun with this no? 

Seeing a Gritty opportunity here. 

3 hours ago, NAVY said:

Fucking fitLump is being discussed on the local news. JFC 

Are they discusiing if she's any good?  Dead fish in bed?  A moaner/screamer/squirter? 

[Chewbacca 7786]

I've been looking for that gif for awhile now. Can't find it anywhere.

Paging @Ramjet.

[XYZ 2154]

Why “fitlump”?

[KaiserSoze 998]

1 minute ago, XYZ said:

Why “fitlump”?

She originally posted as FitLove on Shaggy- back when she was spending time at the gym with Ricky the Pedo, "fitness modeling", cam whoring etc. and she has a horn/lump on her forehead, hence FitLump/fitlump

[DougO 5256]

23 hours ago, bolverk said:

Cont'd:

"From standing courageously behind our law enforcement community to demanding safer conditions for our homeless population to fighting for transparency at City Hall, the voice of Northwest Austin is [sic] has been heard," she wrote. "Considering the stark differences between my campaign's priorities and the platform of the incumbent, their united voice is resoundingly clear this evening."

Her first official press release had a typo...or she could've been rambling drunk. [Sic] not added by me.

 

That photo makes it look like she botoxed her whole face in effort to bring it to the altitude of the great horn of cray. But it's still there.

[DougO 5256]

10 hours ago, Covri said:

 

 

I think blueface is considered acceptable.