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Fitlump fucking won a Austin City Council seat, Now on to Congress 2026!

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By atomheartbevo
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I personally have no idea what you're referring to, but I did see this online.

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NotActuallyALonghorn

NotActuallyALonghorn 4962

Posted
Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, Orange&White said:

Why not? Everyone in Austin that bitches incessantly about affordability, turns around and votes yes for every fucking bond thrown at them and continually re-elects the same shitbags time and time again.

 

With that said, I didn't vote for Kelly, and couldn't anyway because I live in D10. Either way, I wouldn't piss on her if she was on fire because I actually know more about her than what is public and what is known on these boards and, as crazy as it may sound, she is actually even far worse of a person than she is portrayed here. Let that sink in.

 

What does it say about a person if the regulars at the Water Tank shun them?

 

 

Like when she comes and picks the kid up from you she's never on time? 

Edited by NotActuallyALonghorn
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Wally Pryor

Wally Pryor 5217

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1 hour ago, Orange&White said:

...continually re-elects the same shitbags time and time again.

 

 

 

We'll see what the next cycle holds.  Kelly's election promises great entertainment value and a ratings increase for the public info channel but she's not going to change anything of substance.  Possibly her dress on occasion, but that's it.  And that's not a given at all.   Assuming the mindlessness of the council continues, Ellis (my district) is destined to be one and done.  Not especially liked and doesn't engage at all with constituents.  Troxy may decide to re-boot with her kids getting a little older.  But less than 50/50 chance of that.  

I see where Caesar is likely to be mayor pro tem.  Guessing since he bowed out of a state seat his next plan is to be the next mayor when the wet rag's term expires in Jan '23. 

 

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Jerry Callo

Jerry Callo 8638

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, tbone_ said:


Don’t mean to cloak this up but seems to me the red bloods in Wilco have such a hard on for the right wing party line she spewed that it got this complete fucking vapid moron elected.

Guess that’s our world.

Nice try.  Travis County owns this shit.

https://www.wilco.org/Portals/0/Departments/Elections/1220/2020DECEMBER Official - Election Day Results Summary Report_web.pdf

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Deej

Deej 76299

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Armybrat said:

Her opposition to the crazy city council homeless fiasco & “defund APD” is what got her elected. That is hardly a rightwing party line. Plenty of leftwingnuts around town don’t like that madness either.

So they elect a homeless person. Crazy. 

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OWLVIS

OWLVIS 557

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

You know... we all made mistakes when we were younger. Perhaps Lump has turned over a new leaf? Maybe she's seen the error of her ways? This country loves a comeback story. And let's face it, there is no greater comeback story than a fake tit posting, alcoholic, absentee parent, Lance Armstrong clock choking, Harvard educated, Romeo Rose trolling, cam girl Faith posing, lingerie football playing, attention whoring, injury faking, shitting on the homeless, gamergating, plagiarizing, fake fire fighting, disaster sciencing, ripping off the elderly, physically deformed, pathological liar ascending to public office.

It's the gotdam American dream, a classic redemption story, and you guys are shitting all over her. She's an inspiration. If Lump can turn her life around, maybe there is hope for the rest of us? Maybe one day I will actually read an entire Randolph Duke post? Maybe Spider2Ybanana will have an insightful comment? Maybe futureman will stop trolling? Maybe Phlegm will make a coherent post? Maybe closetojumping will finally admit that he's Greg Davis? Maybe Katfid will stop judging people by the color of their skin instead of the content of their character? Maybe NowThis will come out of hiding? 

classis rags to riches story. We've all heard it a thousand times

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

Posted
Posted (edited)

Wait, Romeo Rose is a real guy?  I thought that was just some shorthand for some shit y'all made up about FitLump?  

He looks like the first Englishmen of minor title/royalty to die in a medieval period piece who somehow got down's syndrome right before the scene.

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Pescado_Rojo

Pescado_Rojo 19282

Posted
Posted

Do we need some prop bets for her term? I'm thinking something like:  

Gets a DWI during her term?

Gets knocked up during her term? 

Fakes an injury?

Gets sued?

Gets arrested for personal misconduct? (bar fight, theft not related to city resources, etc)

Gets arrested for fraud/money laundering/ theft involving city resources?

Shows up randomly with an eye patch?

Regains custody of her kid (hahahahahahahaha!)

Has an affair with/ruins marriage of a well known Republican politician or power broker?

 

What are some other good ones? 

 

 

 

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Pasken

Pasken 1309

Posted
Posted
Just now, Pescado_Rojo said:

Do we need some prop bets for her term? I'm thinking something like:  

Gets a DWI during her term?

Gets knocked up during her term? 

Fakes an injury?

Gets sued?

Gets arrested for personal misconduct? (bar fight, theft not related to city resources, etc)

Gets arrested for fraud/money laundering/ theft involving city resources?

Shows up randomly with an eye patch?

Regains custody of her kid (hahahahahahahaha!)

Has an affair with/ruins marriage of a well known Republican politician or power broker?

 

What are some other good ones? 

 

 

 

She is going to get caught for some kind of financial corruption. 

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J.R. Juniors Junior Jr.

J.R. Juniors Junior Jr. 1084

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

Do we need some prop bets for her term? I'm thinking something like:  

Gets a DWI during her term?

Gets knocked up during her term? 

Fakes an injury?

Gets sued?

Gets arrested for personal misconduct? (bar fight, theft not related to city resources, etc)

Gets arrested for fraud/money laundering/ theft involving city resources?

Shows up randomly with an eye patch?

Regains custody of her kid (hahahahahahahaha!)

Has an affair with/ruins marriage of a well known Republican politician or power broker?

 

What are some other good ones? 

 

 

 

Loses the current lawsuit against her from a former employer while in office?

Gets the 'rona at a political event?

Gets evicted from her in-laws' joint, no longer lives in the district?

Is found to be the woman that set fire to the homeless camp this week?

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Orange&White

Orange&White 5510

Posted
Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

Do we need some prop bets for her term? I'm thinking something like:  

Gets a DWI during her term?

Gets knocked up during her term? 

Fakes an injury?

Gets sued?

Gets arrested for personal misconduct? (bar fight, theft not related to city resources, etc)

Gets arrested for fraud/money laundering/ theft involving city resources?

Shows up randomly with an eye patch?

Regains custody of her kid (hahahahahahahaha!)

Has an affair with/ruins marriage of a well known Republican politician or power broker?

 

What are some other good ones? 

 

 

 

I doubt she gets a DWI. She's the only member of the Council that actively and vocally supports APD. I'd be surprised if an APD cop hauled her in.

1 hour ago, Pasken said:

She is going to get caught for some kind of financial corruption. 

This would be my guess if anything were to happen.

 

I think the reality is she will serve out her term and be a laughing stock by everyone with a brain just like Zimmerman was and then get voted out after one term.

She has hidden herself very well for having just won a campaign. The real fun will be starting now that she can't hide her stupidity every time a camera is in her face and she starts talking without cue cards from Mackowiak.

Edited by Orange&White
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NorthLoop

NorthLoop 14027

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

Do we need some prop bets for her term? I'm thinking something like:  

Gets a DWI during her term?

Gets knocked up during her term? 

Fakes an injury?

Gets sued?

Gets arrested for personal misconduct? (bar fight, theft not related to city resources, etc)

Gets arrested for fraud/money laundering/ theft involving city resources?

Shows up randomly with an eye patch?

Regains custody of her kid (hahahahahahahaha!)

Has an affair with/ruins marriage of a well known Republican politician or power broker?

 

What are some other good ones? 

 

 

 

 

PAiqQho.jpg

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Biff Tannen

Biff Tannen 45383

Posted
Posted
5 hours ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

Do we need some prop bets for her term? I'm thinking something like:  

Gets a DWI during her term?

Gets knocked up during her term? 

Fakes an injury?

Gets sued?

Gets arrested for personal misconduct? (bar fight, theft not related to city resources, etc)

Gets arrested for fraud/money laundering/ theft involving city resources?

Shows up randomly with an eye patch?

Regains custody of her kid (hahahahahahahaha!)

Has an affair with/ruins marriage of a well known Republican politician or power broker?

 

What are some other good ones? 

 

 

 

I think we should take bets on who can facilitate these items. Come on surly. We have the resources and the wherewithal. This is a sham. Let’s make sure it is seen as such. 

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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89279

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She's getting interviewed by the media.   The darkest timeline.

https://www.kxan.com/news/local/austin/newly-elected-austin-city-council-member-mackenzie-kelly-speaks-after-win/

Quote

Newly-elected Austin City Council Member Mackenzie Kelly speaks after win

Kelly says she is honored to be selected, and that she’s ready to represent the northwest Austin area.

“The first challenge I see is trying to overcome the narrative that my opponent expressed about me during the campaign,” she said. “I want everyone to know that I am very inclusive of people of all different backgrounds, and I want to make sure they are represented in the correct way.”

She will be inaugurated January 6th.

 

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South Austin

South Austin 51903

Posted
Posted
15 hours ago, Lobo said:

Wait, Romeo Rose is a real guy? 

So I actually knew Romeo Rose was a real guy, but had thought Fitlove, k/n/a Fitlump, was a work of fiction, some internet troll talking about "her" boob job to get a bunch of posters all worked up.  Not only is she real, but she's now on our City Council.  Jesus Christ.

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

Posted
Posted (edited)

Oh, I knew she was real.  I still don't know, on purpose, all of the stories from the old days about her on this site and TOS.  Or all that Take Back Austin shit.  

But I got serious about this thread once City Council started buying up properties at 3x market value that somebody was gonna come along and "disrupt" the process.  I figured it'd be somebody normal.  But nope, 2020 bitches!  

I know our Surly resident Austin NIMBY liberals who don't actually care about solving homelessness will disagree with me.  But you can disagree, as I did, with Don Zimmerman's approach, but he understood simple maths.  Ellen and Sherri rubbed people the wrong way as social conservatives but they care about the city and its citizens.  I don't give a fuck about your progressive visions for Austin because some of it is ruining this city and I know from working inside the sausage factory.  You need a few adults on that dais to keep us left, but center-left and on course and fiscally responsible.  That rudder has been gone for the last 2-4 years.  And what does 2020 deliver us?  A lone "conservative" voice in the form of fucking FitLump?  This is a sick fucking joke.  Again, I know most of you didn't like her but a councilwoman like Ellen Troxclair?  She was measured, educated, respectable, knew the processes, passionate about doing her small part, respectful of her colleagues and of the position.  And then you get Mackenzie who thinks a William F. Buckley is something you do in the parking lot of the Water Tank for $80 an a 5-star rating.  

I know many around the city, regardless of district, wanted her up there as their conduit voice.  But Kelly is not the right way to do this.  We are so fucked. 

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Wally Pryor

Wally Pryor 5217

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20 minutes ago, Lobo said:

You need a few adults on that dais to keep us left, but center-left and on course and fiscally responsible.  That rudder has been gone for the last 2-4 years.  And what does 2020 deliver us?  A lone "conservative" voice in the form of fucking FitLump?  This is a sick fucking joke.  Again, I know most of you didn't like her but a councilwoman like Ellen Troxclair?  She was measured, educated, respectable, knew the processes, passionate about doing her small part, respectful of her colleagues and of the position.  And then you get Mackenzie who thinks a William F. Buckley is something you do in the parking lot of the Water Tank for $80 an a 5-star rating.  

I know many around the city, regardless of district, wanted her up there as their conduit voice.  But Kelly is not the right way to do this.  We are so fucked. 

Yes, bodies that are centered, moderate and most importantly, more sensible.  And some fiscal responsibility would be nice vs. the Oh, it's-just-Monopoly-money attitude that currently exists.  Extremism, in either direction, sucks.   And so the change we get is Kelly ?   We used to think the idea of Cochran being on council was comedic...

All of those things regarding Troxclair are true.  And if you did or still don't like her then you don't give a shit about really good representation for the city.  It's still two years out but I'm still hopeful she's going to throw her hat back in the ring.   

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BearSchlong

BearSchlong 8067

Posted
Posted (edited)

https://www.facebook.com/ToddandDon/posts/10158077153624200

Whoever has a burner facebook account needs to do work.

Some of the comments are gold. . ."Mackenzie cares, she doesn't want us to become seattle, san francisco, LA. . ."

The microcosm of the new GOP - zero principles, zero ideology, just hitch your wagon to the grift horse.

Edited by BearSchlong
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Eskimohorn

Eskimohorn 5587

Posted
Posted
I'd love to see the camping ban reinstated, but what good does it do if it was never enforced even when it was originally in place? There have been homeless camps under overpasses in Austin for the last 8 years.

There have been significant changes in the last several years in correlation to the repeal of the camping ban. We have also seen a correlation with an increase in long-term homeless. But to your point, dudes have been camping their for decades.
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Wally Pryor

Wally Pryor 5217

Posted
Posted (edited)
14 minutes ago, Orange&White said:

I'd love to see the camping ban reinstated, but what good does it do if it was never enforced even when it was originally in place? There have been homeless camps under overpasses in Austin for the last 8 years.

I've driven Ben White east toward 35 pretty much every day for the last 12 years.   There have been tents here and there for the last couple years.   There's now villages of tents and all the underpasses are maxed out so the villages are expanding to the embankments.  Big difference. 

The guys under the Ben White and Manchaca have upped their game over those near Strait Music.  The latter just have a big screen, the former now have a tv and pinball machine.  It's not a full sized one but still.  I don't see how they've gotten cable for either screen but with $65MM no reason we can't help them out there. 

Edited by Wally Pryor
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Orange&White

Orange&White 5510

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, Wally Pryor said:

I've driven Ben White west to 35 pretty much every day for the last 12 years.   There have been tents here and there for the last couple years.   There's now villages of tents and all the underpasses are maxed out so the villages are expanding to the embankments.  Big difference. 

The guys under the Ben White and Manchaca have upped their game over those near Strait Music.  The latter just have a big screen, the former now have a tv and pinball machine.  It's not a full sized one but still.  I don't see how they've gotten cable for either screen but with $65MM no reason we can't help them out there. 

I understand that there are more now than there were 8-10 years ago, but what good is a law if it is not enforced or only selectively enforced? It's not like if the ban is reinstated all of this is going to magically disappear. Especially when the elected leaders will not allow the Police Chief to enforce.

 

I support reinstating the ban, but just placing another law on the book won't fix this. Changing out the elected leaders that allow it will.

 

So basically, we're fucked because Austin voters are idiots.

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