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Wulaw Horn

By Wulaw Horn
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Wulaw Horn
Wulaw Horn

Welp, I got some bad news today that is going to put a bullet in the head of this whole thing- repair bill came back at $37k and timeline to fix came back at 3 plus months.  it looks like the insura

Wulaw Horn
Wulaw Horn

Today was a travel day. Garner state park to Big Bend.  when you travel shit flies around if it’s not locked down tight. I put my money in an envelope, $578.86 in the microwave because fuck it- we’v

Wulaw Horn
Wulaw Horn

Houston, but yeah- the consensus over under seems to be 2-3 months.  Me to wife- how much was the bill at Walmart her- $400.  Me- what the fuck- you had like 9 bags of groceries is all

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Wulaw Horn

Wulaw Horn 19059

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Today was a travel day. Garner state park to Big Bend. 
when you travel shit flies around if it’s not locked down tight. I put my money in an envelope, $578.86 in the microwave because fuck it- we’ve never once used the microwave in the entirety of the time we owned the RV. Told my wife that was where the money was. 
went outside to drink 5 beers before bedtime after a long ass travel day. 
just got a text from the wife- the 11 year old girl decided she was going to make herself a s’more in the microwave (seriously what the fuck- who makes microwave s’mores?) and ignored the fact that there was a giant fucking envelope in the microwave, started it up to make her smore, and caught the envelope on fire, burning said $578.86 and ruining the microwave. Then she ate the fucking s’more even though, you know, it was in a microwave on fire with metal coins. 

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FartingMonk

FartingMonk 3606

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21 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

Today was a travel day. Garner state park to Big Bend. 
when you travel shit flies around if it’s not locked down tight. I put my money in an envelope, $578.86 in the microwave because fuck it- we’ve never once used the microwave in the entirety of the time we owned the RV. Told my wife that was where the money was. 
went outside to drink 5 beers before bedtime after a long ass travel day. 
just got a text from the wife- the 11 year old girl decided she was going to make herself a s’more in the microwave (seriously what the fuck- who makes microwave s’mores?) and ignored the fact that there was a giant fucking envelope in the microwave, started it up to make her smore, and caught the envelope on fire, burning said $578.86 and ruining the microwave. Then she ate the fucking s’more even though, you know, it was in a microwave on fire with metal coins. 

Holy shit.  That is some funny shit.

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phdhorn

phdhorn 6224

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1 hour ago, Wulaw Horn said:

Today was a travel day. Garner state park to Big Bend. 
when you travel shit flies around if it’s not locked down tight. I put my money in an envelope, $578.86 in the microwave because fuck it- we’ve never once used the microwave in the entirety of the time we owned the RV. Told my wife that was where the money was. 
went outside to drink 5 beers before bedtime after a long ass travel day. 
just got a text from the wife- the 11 year old girl decided she was going to make herself a s’more in the microwave (seriously what the fuck- who makes microwave s’mores?) and ignored the fact that there was a giant fucking envelope in the microwave, started it up to make her smore, and caught the envelope on fire, burning said $578.86 and ruining the microwave. Then she ate the fucking s’more even though, you know, it was in a microwave on fire with metal coins. 

Man, you're not looking on the bright side.  Now you know the microwave works like a charm!

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Wulaw Horn

Wulaw Horn 19059

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5 hours ago, markstanco said:

Weird place to put money. No way I would do that with kids. Or without kids. Only if I was single in an RV and nobody else on board. The cabinet to the left would be my choice with others around.

I swear we have never used the damn thing once. We cook everything (and we cook a lot) on a flat top grill that is electric and plugged in. I just wanted it someplace that wouldn’t come open (like the drawers do) or that the kids wouldn’t get into (like the cabinets if they are going for clothes and/or food) where they’d stuff it down somewhere I couldn’t find it. In retrospect maybe the oven would have been better, but yeah- I didn’t ever for a moment think she was going to do that. 
it wasn’t in my wallet bc that was like 33 bills and a pain in the ass (literally) to carry all that around in my back pocket.  
 

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Wulaw Horn

Wulaw Horn 19059

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7 hours ago, rage-a-holic said:

I hope you beat the fuck out of your daughter.

Too many little girls are growing up these days significantly dumber than their extremely stupid mothers, mostly due to lack of training and discipline. 

I did not beat her. She was crying and hysterical and I gave her a hug and told her I loved her and it was ok. 

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dcbc

dcbc 14453

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No matter what other fuckery Wulaw may bring this board, he has given us
Sex Tent
Can-opener RV treatment
Literally lighting money on fire
 
And for those, he is a Longhorn Legend.
Please, someone make a mock LHN Longhorn Legend commercial for Wulawhorn.
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Wulaw Horn

Wulaw Horn 19059

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46 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

No matter what other fuckery Wulaw may bring this board, he has given us

Sex Tent

Can-opener RV treatment

Literally lighting money on fire

 

And for those, he is a Longhorn Legend.

Also gave away playoff tickets to every Astros playoff game last year plus $750 free money for the NCAA tournament. We will be doing a football prediction giveaway contest as well. 

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TexasEd

TexasEd 8066

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59 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

No matter what other fuckery Wulaw may bring this board, he has given us

Sex Tent

Can-opener RV treatment

Literally lighting money on fire

 

And for those, he is a Longhorn Legend.

can we get hot links to each of these posts?  You know shortcuts to save surfing through 26 pages.

 

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Sbbruin

Sbbruin 21809

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12 hours ago, rage-a-holic said:

I hope you beat the fuck out of your daughter.

Too many little girls are growing up these days significantly dumber than their extremely stupid mothers, mostly due to lack of training and discipline. 

Username and wutnot

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utee94

utee94 15772

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3 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

No matter what other fuckery Wulaw may bring this board, he has given us

Sex Tent

Can-opener RV treatment

Literally lighting money on fire

 

And for those, he is a Longhorn Legend.

And a Real Man of Genius.

Here's to you, Mr. Driving the RV Into a Bridge Guy!

 

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KYHorn

KYHorn 16948

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16 hours ago, rage-a-holic said:

I hope you beat the fuck out of your daughter.

Too many little girls are growing up these days significantly dumber than their extremely stupid mothers, mostly due to lack of training and discipline. 

Username...

Awkward Season 4 GIF by The Office

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irishtexan

irishtexan 11469

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16 hours ago, rage-a-holic said:

I hope you beat the fuck out of your daughter.

Too many little girls are growing up these days significantly dumber than their extremely stupid mothers, mostly due to lack of training and discipline. 

user name definitely checks out.

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Wulaw Horn

Wulaw Horn 19059

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It’s only 112 degrees right now in big bend at the camp site. I don’t understand why summer is their low season!

I’m enjoying it. Going to Macdonald observatory tonight. Wife is less than impressed. I’m going in the car. She chose to stay in RV with our 7 year old. I’m taking the 9 and 11 to observatory. 

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Updawg

Updawg 2263

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It’s only 112 degrees right now in big bend at the camp site. I don’t understand why summer is their low season!
I’m enjoying it. Going to Macdonald observatory tonight. Wife is less than impressed. I’m going in the car. She chose to stay in RV with our 7 year old. I’m taking the 9 and 11 to observatory. 

You driving all the way from big bend to the observatory?
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Wulaw Horn

Wulaw Horn 19059

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26 minutes ago, Updawg said:


You driving all the way from big bend to the observatory?

We took the car so we are in that. It’s like 2.5 hours. 
because we took the car the travel to and fro places is fine, but the travel around when we are there is the regular run of the mill shit show. 

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sidis

sidis 9805

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53 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

We took the car so we are in that. It’s like 2.5 hours. 
because we took the car the travel to and fro places is fine, but the travel around when we are there is the regular run of the mill shit show. 

@4th&Five and I did that 15 years ago. Drove up and had dinner in alpine and then on to the observatory. Drive up was easy. Problem was coming back after the 2.5 pot brownies my lightweight ass ate kicked in on the switchbacks coming back down at 1:30. Complete fucking meltdown paranoia induced freak out. Made it to Ft Savis at about 11mph the whole way and stopped in a gravel lot at some place in FD. Freaked out some more about how I was going to drive a friend’s aircraft carrier of a Cadillac off the side of the mountain and kill them all, then proceeded to barf all over that parking lot for a few minutes. Felt fine after that and drove everyone back to the chisos basin campground and arrived just as the sun was rising. Proceeded to hike emory peak that morning. Was great, no regrets.

Not recommended though. 

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Incredulity

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10 hours ago, sidis said:

@4th&Five and I did that 15 years ago. Drove up and had dinner in alpine and then on to the observatory. Drive up was easy. Problem was coming back after the 2.5 pot brownies my lightweight ass ate kicked in on the switchbacks coming back down at 1:30. Complete fucking meltdown paranoia induced freak out. Made it to Ft Savis at about 11mph the whole way and stopped in a gravel lot at some place in FD. Freaked out some more about how I was going to drive a friend’s aircraft carrier of a Cadillac off the side of the mountain and kill them all, then proceeded to barf all over that parking lot for a few minutes. Felt fine after that and drove everyone back to the chisos basin campground and arrived just as the sun was rising. Proceeded to hike emory peak that morning. Was great, no regrets.

Not recommended though. 

No great stories begin with, “I got a solid 9hrs sleep….”

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RPM

RPM 26302

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On 6/7/2022 at 9:57 AM, Brisketexan said:

No matter what other fuckery Wulaw may bring this board, he has given us

Sex Tent

Can-opener RV treatment

Literally lighting money on fire

 

And for those, he is a Longhorn Legend.

I'm thinking @henrygandorf needs to make a deal for the movie rights.

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Wulaw Horn

Wulaw Horn 19059

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I’m trying to teach the boy (9 YO) about responsibility and how to take care of things and the like and grow him up and become a man. Mehta could be more manly than dumping the sewage tank, right?

He’s been doing it with me for the last 3 times on the trip. We go out there and he says, dad- I’ve got this, I can’t do the hose so if you could do that I will do every thing else. 
me beaming- proud of you boy, good for you. 
I go over to move the hose from city water to black tank flush. I turn off the water as he’s hauls out the slinky. Start transferring over the hose. He pulls off the cap and before he hooks the hose up he pulls all the levers and just covers us with 4 days of our own shit and piss. It’s 108 degrees so the smell is even better than you’d think. He added a pile of vomit to the piss and shit. We bore down and got it done. Now we took a shower and threw away our clothes and flip flops. 
he was so upset, thought I was going to be mad at him. We laughed and told him that’s how We learn and if he’s as smart as I think he is we won’t end up covered in shit again because he will learn  from that. 

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Brisketexan

Brisketexan 104905

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I’m trying to teach the boy (9 YO) about responsibility and how to take care of things and the like and grow him up and become a man. Mehta could be more manly than dumping the sewage tank, right?
He’s been doing it with me for the last 3 times on the trip. We go out there and he says, dad- I’ve got this, I can’t do the hose so if you could do that I will do every thing else. 
me beaming- proud of you boy, good for you. 
I go over to move the hose from city water to black tank flush. I turn off the water as he’s hauls out the slinky. Start transferring over the hose. He pulls off the cap and before he hooks the hose up he pulls all the levers and just covers us with 4 days of our own shit and piss. It’s 108 degrees so the smell is even better than you’d think. He added a pile of vomit to the piss and shit. We bore down and got it done. Now we took a shower and threw away our clothes and flip flops. 
he was so upset, thought I was going to be mad at him. We laughed and told him that’s how We learn and if he’s as smart as I think he is we won’t end up covered in shit again because he will learn  from that. 

Like I said….Wulaw: longhorn. LEGEND.
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