Alabama’s resume over the decade

[Longboard Horn 40,375]

Saw this posted in the college football smash talk group over on Facebook earlier today and thought it would be something interesting to discuss. 

“2009: Needed to injure Colt McCoy to beat Texas 

2010: Blew a 24-0 lead to Scam Newton 

2011: Needed the BCS to save them after they failed to win their own division

2012: Needed Ohio State to be on a postseason ban to make the title game 

2013: Kick Six choke plus a loss to Chokelahoma in the Sugar Bowl 

2014: Lost to a 3rd string QB with a single digit IQ in the CFP

2015: Needed a gimmick onside kick to beat Clemson 

2016: “Greatest defense ever” chokes against Clemson in the National Championship  

2017: Needed ESPN bias to make the CFP and a Georgia choke job to win the National Championship 

2018: “Greatest team ever” needs another Georgia choke job to win the SEC, then lose 44-16 to a true freshman QB in the National Championship 

2019: Face two quality opponents and lose to both of them 

Dominant? Dynasty?

Lol NOPE!

Roll Fraud!”

Discuss amongst yourselves 

Edited August 18, 2020 by Longboard Horn

[TrashMaster G 17,568]

And if I am Alabama, the only response is: Don't care, won five National Championships

And it is an untrumpable response.

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

[6th Street 6,426]

 

Just now, TrashMaster G said:

And if I am Alabama, the only response is: Don't care, won five National Championships

That'll do it. Lock it up 

[Longboard Horn 40,375]

8 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

And if I am Alabama, the only response is: Don't care, won five National Championships

And it is an untrumpable response.

/thread

[SwanderedTalent 5,761]

10 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

And if I am Alabama, the only response is: Don't care, won five National Championships

And it is an untrumpable response.

this vaguely reminds me of that post about how based on KenPom's metric, Texas is ahead of Connecticut (in basketball) since the turn of the century or something

Alabama is doing college football as well as it can be done right now. Maybe Clemson's close. Ohio State is a distant third. Texas leads in revenue.

[C-Man 27,233]

Fuck Bama. I'll argue 'til the end of time that we were going to beat them before Colt got hurt and the rematch opportunity against LSU was some serious bullshit. The rest were won on the field and, yes, they lost a few times in there (shit happens). They're still on the greatest run I've ever seen a college football program get on and are showing no signs of stopping yet. I'm envious.

(If you really want to do something, debunk some of their claimed-after-the-fact national titles that they use to get to 17.)

[mdmost 43,004]

You want a real kick to the nuts? Do the same for Texas' lost decade. Alabama's decade is where Texas fans thought we'd be after 2009. 

[Guest Lobo]

Yeah, I don't like Alabama but just like Oklahoma...I'd trade recent history and/or coaching staffs with them in a heartbeat.  We've averaged 5 losses per season under Herman and the line for some of y'all to suck his dick is a mile long somehow still.  Alabama, Oklahoma, et. al.  They still care about hardware at those places.  I've finally learned that we just don't.  We're a great fanbase and I love our program, but we just don't actually care as much as we think we do about winning.  This latest Alabama dynasty will be revered for decades and rightfully so.

[David Dennison 18,925]

1 minute ago, mdmost said:

You want a real kick to the nuts? Do the same for Texas' lost decade. Alabama's decade is where Texas fans thought we'd be after 2009. hi

The good news is, this is still very possible.

The bad news is, it's not very probable.

 

[justhookit 4,191]

This is a bad thread and you should feel bad.

[ztejas 43,487]

Stop what you're doing. Roll over. Call for help once you are in a safe place.

You may have contracted a very serious disease known as aggyitis. Common ways to catch this disease include:

- Spending time in BCS

- Spending time on aggy message boards

- Copy/pasting something an aggy has said on the internet 

- Nurturing relationships with barnyard animals

- Saying things like "that one didn't count!" and "you didn't win we ran out of time!"

Please inform anyone you have been in close proximity with recently that you may be a carrier of aggyitis. 

And remember, a world without aggy is a world for our children. 

[Longboard Horn 40,375]

After seeing more of his posts, it’s obvious that the OP who posted this on Facebook is a disgruntled Tennessee fan. 

Edited August 18, 2020 by Longboard Horn

[ztejas 43,487]

5 minutes ago, Longboard Horn said:

After seeing more of his posts, it’s obvious that the OP who posted this on Facebook is a disgruntled Tennessee fan. 

 

[strangulation! 1,716]

that is quite possibly the dumbest post of all time

[Henry Hill 3,156]

[TexArcher 37,983]

Now do "Reasons Why the Patriots Really Aren't That Good In Spite of How Good They Are."

[JWinTX 53]

38 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Yeah, I don't like Alabama but just like Oklahoma...I'd trade recent history and/or coaching staffs with them in a heartbeat.  We've averaged 5 losses per season under Herman and the line for some of y'all to suck his dick is a mile long somehow still.  Alabama, Oklahoma, et. al.  They still care about hardware at those places.  I've finally learned that we just don't.  We're a great fanbase and I love our program, but we just don't actually care as much as we think we do about winning.  This latest Alabama dynasty will be revered for decades and rightfully so.

But how about all those revenues? Rich af...

/sarcasm

[Ghost of Shag 2,614]

I feel bad myself for opening this thread.

[DaggerHorns 3,085]

It just speaks to how the vast majority of teams in nearly every sport need some sort luck to win a title.

If we faced Florida in 2008, we would have beat them. Or....if Gideon knew how to catch, would would have another ring. It never made sense that a team that lost time Ole Miss at home went ahead of us.

If Colt has been one foot to the left on the QB sneak he would have gone on to throw for 300+ yds and got a ring in ‘09.

If Michael Huff would’ve been one foot to the left, Lindale White May have gotten that first down.

Its all part of the sport.

[USNALonghorn 5,078]

I wish we were coming off of a decade where "people" were questioning our 5 titles and 7 title game appearances.

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

32 minutes ago, Longboard Horn said:

After seeing more of his posts, it’s obvious that the OP who posted this on Facebook is a disgruntled Tennessee fan.  Phil Fulmer

 

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

3 minutes ago, DaggerHorns said:

It just speaks to how the vast majority of teams in nearly every sport need some sort luck to win a title.

If we faced Florida in 2008, we would have beat them. Or....if Gideon knew how to catch, would would have another ring. It never made sense that a team that lost time Ole Miss at home went ahead of us.

If Colt has been one foot to the left on the QB sneak he would have gone on to throw for 300+ yds and got a ring in ‘09.

If Michael Huff would’ve been one foot to the left, Lindale White May have gotten that first down.

Its all part of the sport.

If a frog had wings it wouldn't bump its ass when it hopped. 

[Fondren & Main 6,726]

Saban is still 5’4”.  Fuck that short bitch.

Edited August 18, 2020 by Fondren & Main

[ztejas 43,487]

21 minutes ago, TexArcher said:

Now do "Reasons Why the Patriots Really Aren't That Good In Spite of How Good They Are."

Or the Laker's favorite: "The Spurs only won when the Lakers weren't good!"

[TrashMaster G 17,568]

10 minutes ago, ztejas said:

Or the Laker's favorite: "The Spurs only won when the Lakers weren't good!"

Or, the Rockets only won titles when MJ was playing baseball.

Wait, that one is 100% legit.

[ztejas 43,487]

1 minute ago, TrashMaster G said:

Or, the Rockets only won titles when MJ was playing baseball.

Wait, that one is 100% legit.

Well, he had been playing baseball in 95. People forget that Jordan played in the playoffs that season. 

[TexArcher 37,983]

Just now, TrashMaster G said:

Or, the Rockets only won titles when MJ was playing baseball.

Wait, that one is 100% legit.

Except that MJ was back in 1995 and the Bulls lost to the same Orlando team that Houston swept.

Otherwise, really accurate and fresh take.

[HornOnTheBayou 8,936]

I'm one of the biggest Bama haters out there, but I'll still agree that is one dumbass OP. Since we all agree the OP is an idoit, here's something else to discuss. Everyone keeps talking about how hot Elizabeth Hurley is, but let's look at the facts:

1) In the last picture I saw of her, she had some chipped toenail polish on her left middle toe.
2) Her right knee once had an odd-looking blister on it.
3) Her ear lobes are connected to her head.

Listen, y'all drool over her all you want, but I'm staying away. Even if she came begging for sex, I would have to tell her "No thanks".

[TrashMaster G 17,568]

10 minutes ago, ztejas said:

Well, he had been playing baseball in 95. People forget that Jordan played in the playoffs that season. 

 

10 minutes ago, TexArcher said:

Except that MJ was back in 1995 and the Bulls lost to the same Orlando team that Houston swept.

Otherwise, really accurate and fresh take.

Rockets fans are so easy to pull offside. 😂

[Neonmoon 38,129]

Please delete this thread. It's embarrassing. 

[ztejas 43,487]

6 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

 

Rockets fans are so easy to pull offside. 😂

I'm a Spurs fan ese.

Just think that the 94 and 95 title asterisks are some of the lamest out there. Unless you really beleive that the Bulls were capable of winning 8 straight NBA championships in the 90s.

[futureman 22,490]

Just now, ztejas said:

Unless you really beleive that the Bulls were capable of winning 8 straight NBA championships in the 90s.

well, of course.  michael jordan is indisputably the greatest basketball player in the history of the world.  he’d have won 10 straight if he cared enough to do it. 

[TrashMaster G 17,568]

1 minute ago, ztejas said:

I'm a Spurs fan ese.

Just think that the 94 and 95 title asterisks are some of the lamest out there. Unless you really beleive that the Bulls were capable of winning 8 straight NBA championships in the 90s.

Ok, cool.  I really don't give a crap about the NBA.  Just trying to have a little fun on a ridiculous thread in absurd times.

[futureman 22,490]

but it’s nice for houston that he let them have a couple. 

[ztejas 43,487]

Just now, TrashMaster G said:

Ok, cool.  I really don't give a crap about the NBA.  Just trying to have a little fun on a ridiculous thread in absurd times.

Well you called me a Rockets fan. As recently as last night I made it clear that I would be dead before cheering for the Rockets. Just keeping you honest. 

[TrashMaster G 17,568]

4 minutes ago, ztejas said:

Well you called me a Rockets fan. As recently as last night I made it clear that I would be dead before cheering for the Rockets. Just keeping you honest. 

I honestly didn't know that.  I'll refer you back to my comment about not giving a crap about the NBA.

[Kyrie Eleison 9,312]

2 hours ago, Longboard Horn said:

Saw this posted in the college football smash talk group over on Facebook earlier today and thought it would be something interesting to discuss. 

“2009: Needed to injure Colt McCoy to beat Texas 

2010: Blew a 24-0 lead to Scam Newton 

2011: Needed the BCS to save them after they failed to win their own division

2012: Needed Ohio State to be on a postseason ban to make the title game 

2013: Kick Six choke plus a loss to Chokelahoma in the Sugar Bowl 

2014: Lost to a 3rd string QB with a single digit IQ in the CFP

2015: Needed a gimmick onside kick to beat Clemson 

2016: “Greatest defense ever” chokes against Clemson in the National Championship  

2017: Needed ESPN bias to make the CFP and a Georgia choke job to win the National Championship 

2018: “Greatest team ever” needs another Georgia choke job to win the SEC, then lose 44-16 to a true freshman QB in the National Championship 

2019: Face two quality opponents and lose to both of them 

Dominant? Dynasty?

Lol NOPE!

Roll Fraud!”

Discuss amongst yourselves 

[Surly Bevo 25,060]

I'd kill every last one of you motherfuckers for that resume and have zero regrets.

[Henry Hill 3,156]

6 minutes ago, Surly Bevo said:

I'd kill every last one of you motherfuckers for that resume and have zero regrets.

[totallynotabuttpirate 5,400]

OP has to be an aggy. 

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

If Cal Ripken wasn't so healthy, he never would have broken the consecutive game streak of Gehrig's. 

[C-Man 27,233]

1 hour ago, DaggerHorns said:

It just speaks to how the vast majority of teams in nearly every sport need some sort luck to win a title.

If we faced Florida in 2008, we would have beat them. Or....if Gideon knew how to catch, would would have another ring. It never made sense that a team that lost time Ole Miss at home went ahead of us.

If Colt has been one foot to the left on the QB sneak he would have gone on to throw for 300+ yds and got a ring in ‘09.

If Michael Huff would’ve been one foot to the left, Lindale White May have gotten that first down.

Its all part of the sport.

SEC, mang. And the fact that one of Texas or Oklahoma was going -- not both -- and we "lost" the beauty contest against the Sooners despite beating their ass on the field at a neutral site. That will never sit well with me.

1 hour ago, TexArcher said:

Except that MJ was back in 1995 and the Bulls lost to the same Orlando team that Houston swept.

Otherwise, really accurate and fresh take.

MJ returned that spring and played all of 17 games before the playoffs. He was rusty AF (see him having the worst shooting percentage of his career in those games). And he was wearing jersey #45.

56 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

 

Rockets fans are so easy to pull offside. 😂

Olajuwon played the best basketball I'd ever seen anybody play for that month in 1995 when the Rockets won. He embarrassed one of the league's all-time great defenders in David Robinson (who put up some great numbers himself in that series) in the Western Conference Finals. I don't think anybody was beating that team.

['stache 21,823]

aggy af dtbu

[texifornia 57,022]

The level of entitled butthurt in the original post does match up perfectly with most online Tennessee football discourse I've seen

[DaysOff 7,958]

If ifs and buts were candy and nuts we'd all have a Merry Christmas.

[mulletpelini 5,212]

Hurts my soul the amount of woulda coulda shoulda here.  You're Texas!  You're above this!

[Longboard Horn 40,375]

This is the OP that posted that “resume” on Facebook. His stupidity keeps going....







Then on one of the posts, someone screenshot something he had posted earlier in the year asking, “how are you gonna list them as the greatest team of all time when you constantly shit talk them? ”

[Fondren & Main 6,726]

David Bradford should work for ESPN; masterful trolling.  Maybe he and @futureman can do a hot take show together to rile up all the simpletons.

[mulletpelini 5,212]

Pretty sure David Bradford could run the B1G